Happy Sad Singles Awareness Day to one and all. I haven't updated in a while do to the fact that I was battling some depression but I am doing better and in celebration of this Hallmark Holiday, I bring you Chapter 3 of Leaves of Lothlorien. Oh yeah and if you do not like this I respect your opinion but PLEASE DO NOT FLAME ME. I really don't like being mean to people might really be nice people but if you insult me I will defend myself with an equally if not more cruel response and I am not a mean person, really. Before you read, I would like to stress that this story is a PARODY based loosely on Cassandra Claire's Very Secret Diaries which are based on the movies. It is not for the serious book reading Tolkien fans, especially ones with NO SENSE OF HUMOR WHATSOEVER. Anyways, thank you to my loyal readers. This chapter was written by Nimhithriel and I sometime in August, it was inviting me to one of our movie nights that our group loves to have in celebration of the release of the extended version of the Two Towers. We got dressed up and watched the movie then went on a slight adventure through the beach and woods near our friends house, it was a lot of fun.

Nimhithriel: Thank you for being the best best friend in the whole world and for picking me up when certain cold, frigid, evil people made me feel bad. I love you more than words can say.

Haldir's Heart and Soul: Yes a little imagination can go a long way ;)

Nevdoiel: I am so sorry if what I write made you feel the need to release the contents of your stomach for the world to see. If you had read the subject matter carefully which I suspect that you didn't, you would have seen that it was a PARODY. I think that it is unfair of you to accuse me of "butchering characters" when I couldn't possibly have butchered them as have not even read the books yet. But I have started and am currently somewhere in the middle of chapter one. Your review also led me to think that if you even do have a sense of humor which I am suspecting you don't, it sucks. Your review was really encouraging to a first time author. Would love to hear what you think but since I have blocked you from reviewing my stories, I won't. I hope that you don't take it personally. A little constructive criticism has made me even more determined to finish posting it. Thanks.

Midnight Lady: By your short review of um... I suspect that you are confused and I am sorry if it is not clear and I will try and improve on making it clear. My real friends and I all have roles of LotR characters that is mainly what this is about. This story actually started as emails between my best friend and I. We get really bored and live in a semi small town so this is what we do instead of drugs and other destructive kind of things. Thank you for reading anyways and I hope that this makes it a little more clear. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Ah the battle of Helms Deep, that was most entertaining to watch. It looked a lot like the mortal sport of football. Although it was a shame that so many elves had to die among men. Was a little afraid for my march warden when he "fell down" and had to be embraced by that dirty human who is supposedly the heir of Isildur. But never fear, Haldir will recover he is currently recovering in Rivendell until he is strong enough to be returned to his home. Time passed slowly for me without letters from my dear prince I fell into despair until finally, a letter. It was an invitation to join Legolas, Arwen, Pippen and Aragorn, Strider or whatever his name is at a party or "council" as my son-in-law likes to call them, was a little sore that I was not invited to the last council but at least Elrond will not be in attendance.

Darling Galadriel - I feel I must warn you. The flea infested dirt-bag who is unfit to wear anything, much less the crown of Gondor, and I are attempting to organize a gathering in honor of the release of our favorite adventure (august). We plan on inviting the young hobbit, Pippin (who is always SO much fun...), Your Highness, and Lady Arwen - the latter is in grave peril. The human feels that he ought to get some form of revenge for Lady Arwen's last letter, which was rather scathing if I remember correctly....so, umm - I think care should be taken to hide our letters and not mention anything to the mortals, though Arwen, indeed should be made acquainted with them. I remain, ever yours,
the Prettiest,
Prince of Mirkwood,
your Legolas.

My Dearest Legolas, I very much look forward to seeing you for this celebration. As for the human, if he lays so much as a finger on my grand daughter, I will shove the horn of Gondor straight up his ass, then we'll see how kingly he is. As for

the hobbit, I have never experienced just how fun he can be, but I have heard stories. He better watch his back because the last time that I saw him, he was claiming that you were his, when you clearly belong only to myself and Haldir. I am counting the days until I see you again. Your loving, Galadriel Lady of the Golden Wood

Queen of Lothlorien

and Prettiest Female.

***************************************************************** Here, communication was once again interrupted as the hard, uncertain times and new events made it impossible to send letters to distant lands
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