Chapter 3

"What is wrong with you?" Hermione exclaimed.

Ron laughed darkly, "What is wrong with me? The better question is what is wrong with you?"

"You have been the biggest asshole since I've seen you on the train. There is only so much that I can take Ron before I start talking back!" she yelled.

"There at least we're yelling at each other, this is somewhat normal. You have been acting like a completely different person, but hey I'm supposed to be oblivious," Ron shouted, "I'm sick and tired of this. Either the Hermione I know comes back or I'm finished. I have no desire to be friends with this new version of you."

"Looks like we're not friends anymore then," Hermione said softly, "I'm not going to change who I am or who I've become because it doesn't meet your approval."

Hermione walked up the stairs into the girl's dorm before he had a chance to respond. Hermione tore open the curtains around her bed and started looking for her pajamas. She was so angry with Ron. Ever since the train ride, he had been acting like she's wronged him in some way. Hermione knew that it would be easier on everybody if she just told them she had recently found out she was adopted. Part of her wondered why she didn't just go on and do that. Another part of her, the more dominant part, didn't want to tell anyone. If she kept it to herself, she could do whatever she wanted with that information. Hermione could ignore it and pretend nothing had changed or if she wanted to she could find out who her biological parents were. Talking to Professor Dumbledore would be an easy way to figure it out.

The truth of the matter was that she wasn't ready. As soon as someone else knew, they would pressure her to make a decision. Harry, Ron, and Ginny would look at her differently. Others might have disagreed, but ever since her discovery, Hermione saw a different person in the mirror. She saw a lie, because that's what her appearance was. Hermione Granger was known for her bushy light brown hair, brown eyes, and freckles. If she looked at herself differently, everyone else would. Could she handle the judgment she would receive if this got out? Was she strong enough?

Hermione shook her head to clear the thoughts away. She would stick to her decision not to tell anyone for the time being. Hermione would keep trying to act normal, but she knew that was going to be practically impossible. The image of Hermione Granger, the model student, had blown up and set the bar higher than ever before. She was under a lot of pressure to keep receiving Outstandings, to answer every question in class, and to help others with homework. It almost wasn't fair that she should get held to a higher standard than anyone else. In the past, keeping up that image was a fulltime job. Now that she was Head Girl and was researching her adoption, it was going to crumble. That's why Ron could tell she was different just like Harry could. Instead of shunning her like Ron did, Harry still stood by her side even if he did it silently.

"Are you okay?" Ginny asked Hermione quietly as she entered the room, "Don't worry it's just you and me."

"I think I'll survive, I'm just angry," Hermione admitted.

"It's understandable, Ron can be a moron sometimes," she smiled.

"I know. He's always been this way; he's rotten at dealing with his issues," Hermione laughed sadly.

"It's because he likes you. He likes you more than a friend and he thought that things were going well last term, but then you disappeared for the summer and you've been a little off this year. He's just angry that the chance he saw with you is slipping away," Ginny explained as she sat down on Hermione's bed.

"I never knew that," she commented shocked.

"Yeah, I figured as much. That's why he was yelling at you earlier. Ron doesn't really know how to deal with what's going on," Ginny said, "Do you feel the same way?"

Hermione sighed, "Last year I did have a little crush on him. I never thought he would be interested in me and so all that energy just went into fighting with him. If he had said something before summer started, I would have probably agreed to date him."

"And now?" Ginny asked knowingly.

"I couldn't. I'm not that same girl anymore and I have so much on my plate. I wouldn't be good to anyone if I was in a relationship right now," Hermione answered.

"That's what I thought. He'll get over you if you give him time, but he'll probably be distant for a little while," she told her.

Hermione felt like punching something, "So what am I supposed to do about you guys? It's like you and Harry are going to have to choose sides. Wait, you're going to choose his aren't you?"

"I know it's hard to understand, but Ron needs us right now. You've disappeared from our group of friends for months Hermione. Didn't you realize there were going to be consequences?" Ginny asked exasperated.

"But what if I need you guys right now?" Hermione asked suddenly.

"Well what's going on? Are you finally going to tell us?" Ginny asked.

Hermione didn't answer, because she couldn't. She felt the sadness bubbling in her and she desperately wished she could have voiced what was going on. The thing was she couldn't. Something was keeping her quiet and she didn't know what was. Hermione felt that if she started talking, she would start crying and it would never end. Ginny gave her one final look before disappearing down the stairs.

It wasn't fair. Hermione knew that you were never supposed to get involved romantically with friends, because the friendship would never be the same and it caused problems. It didn't matter that this was completely one sided, but because of Ron's feelings she had to deal with this situation. Hermione had always thought that if it ever came to that Harry and Ginny would stay neutral. Obviously it was a foolish thought, because Ginny was Ron's sister and family stuck together through thick and thin. Harry liked to make the easier choice and because he had feelings for Ginny, he wouldn't dare make her angry. She knew that if she needed him to be there he would be there for her in a heartbeat, but he would stick with Ron while they were out in public. Ginny was right; this was the consequences to keeping the adoption to herself.

Hermione changed and put on her pajamas hoping that at any moment Ginny would enter changing her mind. Someone entered the dorm, but to her disappointment it was Lavender and Parvati giggling about something. Anger filled her, why was Ron so upset when she had seen him being friendly with Lavender? Hermione decided that boys were ridiculously immature and that she had had enough of it. That was her last thought before she fell into a fitful sleep.

"She looks terrible," someone whispered quite loudly when Hermione sat down at the Gryffindor table.

"I heard she cheated on Ron," another voice said.

Hermione groaned as she heard the rumors that had already been spread. She looked over and saw that Ron, Ginny, and Lavender were joking around. Harry glanced at her concerned and she gave him a small smile. It made her feel better that he wasn't okay with the arrangement. They both knew that Ron would never forgive Harry for sitting with Hermione, because that meant that he was betraying Ron. It was ridiculous, but what could she do? Other than tell them about the adoption, which she wasn't willing to do.

She spent the rest of the week in complete solitude. Even though she had somewhat caught up on the material she hadn't studied, Hermione still didn't answer the questions the professors asked. Everyone thought it was strangely out of character for her to do so, but she didn't want to draw any attention to herself. Everyone made it clear that they didn't care about her, so any attention she did receive was negative. Thankfully the professors didn't mark on participation like muggle schools tended to do, so her grades weren't affected. It was just ridiculous and Hermione was happy she could lose herself in Head duties, schoolwork, or researching glamour charms. So far Hermione hadn't had any luck with the glamour charms, but she was going to keep trying. Professor Dumbledore was barely at school these days away on ministry business for weeks at a time so even if she did want to ask him about it, he wasn't available. Hermione was finishing up an essay, when a voice interrupted her.

"What are you doing?" Pansy Parkinson asked her.

"Writing an essay, what does it look like I'm doing?" Hermione replied grumpy.

"It looks like you're wasting your life away," she answered sitting down across from her, "Seriously, what the hell happened to you Granger?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said.

Parkinson huffed, "You know what I'm talking about. You're not that annoying brat who always answers every single question in class like her life depends on it, you're no longer hanging with those pathetic Gryffindors, and you went from being the second most popular girl to being shunned by the school."

"Well thanks for noticing," Hermione commented dryly, "Who was the most popular girl last year?"

"Me obviously," she laughed, "We need to change this. I will not be competing with Lavender Brown of all people in popularity. You are my rival and what happens to you reflects on me."

"You realize that makes no sense right?" she pointed out.

"Whatever. You need a friend, so we're going to fix you up," Parkinson stated.

"What if I refuse?" Hermione said blankly.

"You have no choice," Parkinson smiled, "We'll start improving your image this weekend in Hogsmeade.

"My image isn't a factor here!" Hermione would have yelled, but she was in the library.

"What is?" she asked curiously.

"I don't know," she huffed.

"Well then we'll start with your image and go from there," Parkinson smiled.

"Why are you trying to help me?" Hermione asked confused.

"I knew a girl who was in a similar situation. You remind me of her," she replied not going into details, "I'll see you Saturday at ten in front of the Great Hall."

Before Hermione had a chance to respond, Pansy Parkinson disappeared. Hermione was confused. They always hated each other; they were rivals. Hermione supposed that if she saw Pansy in a tough position, she would help her no matter how much she hated her. She also admitted that she hadn't been taking very good care of herself and if Parkinson noticed, then everyone else noticed. Harry had been giving her more concerned looks lately, but he still hadn't approached her. It made her angry to think that he hadn't been there for her. He may have felt guilty about leaving her, but he still laughed with them. It killed her that Lavender was taking her position in the group. They used to all think that Lavender was pathetic with all her giggling and simpering. She ached when she thought of how much fun she used to have with the boys. Ron wasn't even close to forgiving her. Pushing those thoughts out of her head, she continued her essay hoping to have it finished before dinner was served.

After eating dinner by herself, Hermione returned to the common room before the Heads meeting she had to attend. As soon as she walked through the portrait, she heard familiar laughter. Deciding to peek before entering, she noticed that it was Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Lavender. Lavender was telling them something using huge hand gestures to add to her story. Everyone looked interested and Hermione was sad to notice that she had Harry's full attention as well. After her story was finished, Ginny started talking. Ron looked warmly at Lavender and she met his gaze smiling. Ron grabbed her hand and kissed it tenderly. Harry was smiling at them and Hermione's stomach dropped. Sadness overwhelmed her to the point that she had to leave the common room. She rushed to classroom 105 just so she could get away from that scene she walked in on. How could sadness overwhelm her this much, but tears refused to come? That couldn't be healthy.

"Why are you so upset," a voice interrupted her thoughts, "If you need to talk about it, talk so I don't need to deal with a moody Granger all meeting."

"I'm just thinking that's all," she answered Malfoy softly.

Malfoy sat across from her, "What are you thinking about?"

Hermione wasn't going to answer at first, but Malfoy had been the only person other than Pansy Parkinson that had been nice to her. It was sad; because it wasn't that he was nice necessarily. He was his usual self, but he was polite. During their Heads meeting he always listened and respected her opinion. Malfoy did insert stupid comments here or there, but he relatively just kept to himself. That was the only reason that she decided to confide in him. He was the only one that was a constant in her life this school year so far. So she made the choice to confide her troubles with Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Lavender to Draco Malfoy of all people.

"That could have been me," Hermione said softly.

"Why isn't it you?" Malfoy asked honestly.

"I'm not that girl anymore," she answered sadly.

"Well then let it go. That was the old you. It's time to move on, it's been blatantly obvious you've been stuck in the past," he told her.

"What if I can't let it go?" Hermione asked scared.

"You're going to have to. You've had the option of going back, but you haven't taken it. There's a reason for that. Just forget about it all. Start over. That's the only advice I can give you," Malfoy said simply.

"Thank you," she smiled sadly.

"We're both Heads. I guess this is what we're supposed to do," he replied uncomfortable.

"I just hate Lavender," Hermione muttered.

"That's probably normal," he answered.

"I'm going to take Parkinson up on her offer. I need to snap out of this phase I've been in. I need to be stronger and more confident. How could I let everything slip? I'm Hermione Granger and if Lavender Brown thinks she can replace me, she's terribly wrong," Hermione said as she quickly left the room forgetting that Malfoy was still there.

Draco Malfoy sighed at the news that Pansy was helping Hermione Granger. He had a feeling he'd be seeing a lot more of Granger and that wasn't something he was sure he wanted. She wasn't that bad now that they've gotten to know each other as Head Boy and Head Girl, but he knew that Pansy would want to be friends with Granger. The world really was becoming a strange place.

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