Raven's eyes fluttered open half an hour before sunrise, like they did every morning. Countless hours of meditation meant she had much more control over her conscious and subconscious states. She had established the routine for most of her life, but what she did after waking up varied based on her mood. Sometimes she would stay in bed and get through a few more chapters of a book while the sun shined through her window, and other times she would head for the roof for a few moments of peace with the sunrise. As a night showerer and generally nighttime person, she didn't take long to get ready and generally slept light as well.
The young sorceress, already dressed in her leotard, draped on her cloak, clipping it together with her communicator underneath. Slipping on her boots, she stopped for a moment to survey her room. Her living quarters were always neat, not because she cleaned often but because she didn't have many possessions to begin with. It is a little dark in here, even for me, she mused. Maybe now that I have some time I should redecorate…just a little bit. Exiting, she headed for the rooftop, determined to spend some more time turning over the dilemmas she had stored away the night before.
It was a clear, albeit slightly chilly, morning in Jump City. Raven walked towards the end and sat down, draping her legs over the edge. There was first the matter of her emotions and what was causing the change in them. And to resolve it, she'd have to trace it back to the biggest day of her life.
"I'm definitely gonna regret this," she murmured to herself, as she braced for the flashbacks. Being consumed…falling down endlessly as the light above grew smaller…waking up in an eternal hell. She grimaced, opening her eyes again. This was what she was destined for, since birth. Everyone feared or worried about her, and over time she resorted to being reluctantly accepting of her fate. That is, until it started to become more and more of a reality. The small glimmer of hope she still held onto, until it was crushed once more. But then…
She opened her eyes, stroking her chin. Until someone, that stubborn, almost comically brave someone, had held onto hope for her.
I guess…I'll just have to have enough hope for the two of us.
Hope is a powerful feeling, she thought wistfully. And from that strand, she took control of her destiny. She thought back to that final moment, when she felt…no, when she knew she was taking her life back.
What do I need to feel Starbolts?
Righteous fury!
Righteous fury indeed, she thought with a wry smile. Maybe sometimes, letting go of your emotions isn't so bad. She thought back to her conversation with Beast Boy.
Having that thing inside of you doesn't make you bad. Knowing when to release it…that's what makes you a man. Interesting. Maybe she could utilize some of her own advice. My powers are controlled by my emotions, but maybe if I learn to loosen up just a little…it'll help me even more. Perhaps that was why she felt calmer. Not only was she free of her curse, but she also knew now that her emotions could be used for good things. Her friends certainly hadn't minded her stoic, dry nature before, as much minor friction as it caused. They were always asking her to join in "fun" things. And she had to admit, that supposed last day was a bit more enjoyable for her than she had expected.
He's green, half of me is metal, and she's from space. You fit in just fine.
"Come here often?" a voice behind her came. She turned around to see none other than the Boy Wonder, striding up to her spot on the edge.
"Not at all," she remarked with her usual dryness. "Would've never expected to see you here."
"It's a popular place," he replied. "You'll need a reservation soon." She rolled her eyes as he took a seat next to her on the edge. The two of them often ran into each other, either late at night or early in the morning. As the two thinkers of the group, they often squeezed out odd hours for alone time. Raven never thought much of it, as it felt natural to be near Robin, even in complete silence. Likewise, Robin felt the same since Raven was never the talkative type to begin with.
"Don't you ever get tired of sunrise?" she asked.
"Not particularly," he responded. "That'd be like saying if you ever got tired of meditating."
"Way different," she snorted. "Unless I suppose you've invented some new solar-powered gadget."
"It has a calming effect. Gives me time to reflect. To contemplate." He gazed at the ocean, the rays from the sun reflecting off the water and brightening the bay.
"Reflect on what?" Raven asked. Robin furrowed his brow.
"It's nothing."
"If it's about Slade, we've had this conversation before." She put her hand on his shoulder, while he continued looking down.
"Partly."
"Are you going to tell me the other part?"
"I don't really feel like talking about it," he muttered, brushing her shoulder off.
"You know," she said, gazing into the distance, "You remind me of someone familiar."
"Who would that be?"
"Myself."
"Charming," he sighed, folding his arms. "What's your point?"
"My point is it's probably a bad sign if I'm the one telling you to open up."
"I don't know if you're the right person to talk to," he admitted. "It's not anything against you. It's just…an awkward situation. I don't know that I'd be comfortable talking to anyone here about it."
"It's about Starfire, isn't it?" Robin looked up in shock, staring at Raven's ever-stoic facial expression.
"How do you know?"
"Your emotions are going crazy. Didn't you ever get trained how to not reveal something like that?" Raven immediately regretted adding the last part, but relaxed when he gave a small smile.
"You know I'm not lying when I say you know me better than anyone."
"Likewise to you."
"I don't know if you'll be able to do anything. It won't bother me if you can't. It might help me to get this off my chest though." He frowned and looked up to meet her expectant violet eyes.
"I'm not a relationship counselor, so you got that part right."
"Thanks for doing this, Raven."
"Just get on with it."
After spending a few minutes briefly describing his feelings, he gazed at Raven to see her reaction. She was looking into space, probably deep in thought. He waited a few minutes for her to finish processing everything, as he knew she often did. Above them, the sun was fully above the horizon, washing the bay in light.
"I understand how you came to feel like this," she said finally. "And you're right. I'm not quite sure what to do. But whatever you decide to end up doing, don't rush it. That's the best help I can give you."
"I know," he replied. "And I'm confused. I can fight villains, save the world, overthrow a whole organization of evil. But I don't know what to do right now."
"Patience," she said simply. "You'll know what to do when the time is right."
"Always the serious one," he chuckled. "Thanks for listening, Rae."
"Maybe you should take some time off. Stop thinking about everything."
"Not gonna happen," he said, shaking his head. "As long as Slade is out there, I need to be on guard."
"You can take a day off," she insisted.
"Since when have you been the endorser of fun?" he said, smirking. She stopped and took a step back, blushing a little.
"I-I'm worried about you, Robin. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself." He stepped towards her and looked into her eyes.
"I'll be fine. You're always here and you understand me the best." She smiled at him and they both felt at ease, if only momentarily.
"We've overstayed our sunrise. It's time to start the day," he decided, going back towards the door.
"Wait," she called after him, stopping him in his tracks. "Before you leave. I had…a question for you."
"Sure. What is it?" he asked, turning around.
"Uh…um…" she looked away momentarily, before composing herself. "Sometime…could you maybe teach me…how to you know, talk to people?"
"Talk…to people?" he said with a quizzical expression.
"Like people you don't know," she clarified. "How to talk to them. Sorry for asking."
"No, no, it's fine," he quickly reassured her. "Come find me sometime today. I can give you a few pointers, although I'm not as good as Cyborg."
"I'd rather learn from you, if that's okay."
"It's a deal then."
After Cyborg cooked up a big continental breakfast, the Titans again departed for their own endeavors. Beast Boy and Cyborg hopped on the couch for another round of Smash Bros, while Starfire tried and failed to convince Robin to go shopping with her (he promised her time in the afternoon), resorting to exploring the many intricacies of social media on her newly-bought laptop. Robin had gone outside to do some more training, and Raven retreated to her room.
Raven removed her communicator from under her cloak and opened it, initiating a call. It'd been three months since they had taken down the Brotherhood of Evil, and while Raven wasn't usually one to get sentimental, she felt a certain attachment to some friends she had made on the Titans' worldwide journey.
"Who's calling this late at night? It's past Bobby's bedtime," a squeaky voice answered.
"I hope I'm not bothering you guys," Raven answered, smiling. "Just checking on you all. Are you staying out of trouble?"
"Raven!" Melvin exclaimed. She was quickly joined on the other end by Timmy and Teether. "Boy, are we excited to see you."
"And I'm excited to see my kids as well," she said, grinning widely for what seemed like the first time in forever. "What have you all been up to?"
"We've been staying at the monastery," Melvin replied. "The monks are really nice here. They feed Bobby lots of tasty food." In the background, two brown legs appeared behind the three children.
"That's great to hear," Raven said. "And you all are getting along okay?" As if on cue, she saw Teether take a huge chomp into Timmy's blanket, who then started screaming at the top of his lungs. Melvin yelled at them to stop and Raven sighed, shaking her head.
"Kids!" Raven snapped. All three stopped fighting and turned to face her. "Behave yourselves."
"Sorry, Raven," Melvin apologized. "It won't happen again, trust me." She yawned and her eyelids started to droop. "It's getting late here. They're both tired."
"Got it," she responded. "Sorry for keeping you up late. I'll call you some other time when it's easier. Let me know if you need anything, okay?"
"You got it!" Melvin answered, holding up a big thumbs up. "We're all gonna go to bed soon. You know, you're kind of like a mom. Thanks for taking care of us!" The screen went black and Raven raised an eyebrow.
"I am not a mom."
"And then my K'Norfka said, that cannot possibly be a Throknar! Hahaha!"
"Uh, that's great, Star." Robin sighed as they walked along the street to the mall. Robin had promised her more time, and tried to keep an open mind still about their relationship. Maybe it wasn't all that bad. But he was starting to realize they didn't have that much in common. She was an alien with a lovable immaturity and emotions-on-the-sleeves type of personality. He was a righteous, borderline-obsessive crime-fighter dedicated to his craft, with a chill teenager demeanor in the few moments he could afford to relax.
"You do not find my joke…amusing?" Starfire asked, concerned yet again.
"You…didn't quite explain to me what all the Tamaranian meant," he quickly replied. "If you did, I'm sure I would've found it funny."
"Oh, of course! How foolish of me!" Starfire exclaimed, hugging Robin and unknowingly depriving him of air. He patted Starfire's back rapidly, indicating he wanted out, and she released him.
"So, uh, what are we shopping for?" he asked as they entered the mall.
"I have watched the moving pictures on the computer, and I am ready to try this 'makeup' by myself!" Starfire declared, dragging him into a cosmetics store.
"Uh, I'll wait outside," he said, letting go of her hand. "I don't think I'm much use to you here."
"Very well. I shall be quick!"
Meanwhile, back at the Tower, Cyborg was whipping up dinner. He had grown tired of eating takeout the past few days and wanted to try some new recipes. Raven watched with mild interest as he hopped from stove to sink to fridge, juggling many utensils and dishes at once.
"So what do you have cooking in the oven?"
"It's my world-famous, CyBQ sauce slathered, baby back ribs!" he exclaimed. "Art takes time. I've been working on this since this morning."
"Interesting," Raven muttered. "And what about the pans you have going there?"
"That's spaghetti, shrimp, and my soul-friendly chicken noodle soup!" Cyborg explained excitedly. He opened up the oven, taking a whiff of the ribs and grinned widely.
"These are some interesting recipes," Raven mused, flipping through the cookbook.
"Cookbooks are for amateurs," Cyborg declared. "I'll use the ingredients, but real cooking—" He paused, clearing his throat. "—is made with the special love of the chef!"
"I don't suppose cars are made the same way either?"
"How did you know?" Cyborg turned around, seeming genuinely surprised.
"Just a wild hunch," Raven muttered, shrugging sarcastically. She flipped the page and found a recipe that interested her. "How about this fruitcake for dessert?"
"Don't have time to make it. Plus I've already got dessert planned. Maybe tomorrow."
"I could try."
"Oh no you don't," Cyborg said, wagging his finger. "Do you remember what happened the last time you tried to cook?"
"The end of the world?"
"Uh, well…that, but what else?!" Cyborg demanded. Raven shrugged.
"The pancakes looked fine to me."
"That's because you didn't eat any of them!"
"It was kind of an improvised thing. I'll do better this time. I'll read the instructions."
"Eh, I suppose," Cyborg conceded. "You can try tomorrow. But I'll be taste-checking every step of the way!"
"Works for me," Raven said, nodding.
"But you'll have to wait until I finish up with my baby first."
"Cyborg, is it really necessary to wax the T-Car every day?" Cyborg turned around with an exasperated expression on his face.
"You don't understand, Rae! My baby is top of the line. If I ever sold her commercially—which I never will, by the way—she'd easily go for over 100 million dollars."
"Whatever you say. Just let me know if you need help building a new one if this one gets blown to bits."
"It's not getting blown up," he said indignantly. "I've installed all the latest armor. My baby is protected better than this tower is."
"What's cooking, my dudes?" Beast Boy emerged from the stairs, sniffing the air dramatically. "Wait…you're making ribs, aren't you?" Cyborg nodded and Beast Boy started to look a little sick. "Ew. I'll stick to my tofu dogs."
"Yum!" the three Titans had barely enough time to turn around before a bright blur made a lap around the main room and stopped in front of them. When they lowered their arms from blocking the wind, they saw none other than a boy in a bright yellow and red jumpsuit with a big grin.
"Dude, we told you to stop doing that!" Beast Boy yelled.
"Yeah, there's a doorbell for a reason!" Cyborg added. "Stop dropping in like this!"
"Chill out guys," Kid Flash responded, raising his hands. "I smelled great cooking. And I need a place to hang out for a little bit."
"What did you do this time?" Raven asked, folding her arms.
"I beat Mas y Menos in another race. I'm on a four race winning streak now. I'm not exactly someone they want to see right now."
Raven smirked. "There's gotta be more to it than that." Kid Flash looked at her innocently.
"I swear, guys, I didn't do anything." Cyborg raised his eyebrow and Beast Boy stared at him. "Okay, okay, so I might have tied their fingers together while they were charging up. But it's their fault for falling for it!"
"You're a real riot," Cyborg said, shaking his head. "Nice of you to drop by, but you gotta go now."
"Aw, but I just got here!" Kid Flash protested. He disappeared again and reappeared with a rib in his hand.
"Hey!" Cyborg roared. "That's not—"
"Too late, you can have seconds," Kid Flash interrupted, taking a big bite. He immediately turned pale and spat it out.
"—done." Beast Boy snickered as Kid Flash ran to the sink, filling his mouth with water.
"How Jinx converted and found him, the world will never know," Raven remarked.
"You sure you don't wanna donate some of this equipment to me?" Kid Flash asked, reappearing. "I mean, I'm sure you've got a new shipment of chips coming in tomorrow or something. By the way, where are Robin and Starfire? On a date?"
"I don't know if anyone knows, actually," Cyborg said, scratching his head.
"This tech is awesome!" Kid Flash commented, holding up a hard drive from the main computer as the three Titans stared in horror.
"Dude, just get out already. I'm tired watching you run around," Beast Boy muttered.
"Nice to know I'm welcome around here too."
"You're always welcome," Raven said suddenly. "Just don't drop in on us like this anymore. Let us know ahead of time."
"Will do," Kid Flash responded, saluting. "Let me know next time you're having ribs!" And with that, he sped out of the tower.
"Raven being welcoming?" Beast Boy asked, confused. "Is there some second prophecy you didn't tell us about?"
"No second prophecy," Raven stated. "Can't I be…welcoming?" Cyborg and Beast Boy looked at each other, and decided to drop the issue for now. They smiled at her and Cyborg went back to cooking while Beast Boy hopped on the couch to watch TV. Raven sighed and brewed herself some herbal tea, then went back to her room to meditate.
After accompanying Starfire on their trip to the mall, Robin breathed a sigh of relief as she decided they were done in town for the day. They came back to a delicious feast cooked by Cyborg and dug in ravenously, Starfire slathering all of her food with mustard. Afterwards, the Titans decided to watch the new Fast and Furious movie that Cyborg had specially ordered for their TV, during which Robin, Cyborg, and Beast Boy were transfixed to the screen, Starfire captivated by just the parts with big explosions and Raven rolling her eyes throughout. Once the movie ended, Beast Boy promptly retreated to get some sleep, Cyborg initiated lockdown and went to sleep as well, and after Robin gave Starfire a goodnight kiss, he stayed in the main room with Raven. Raven poured herself another mug of tea and started reading again, while Robin gazed at the bay through the giant glass windows.
"So how was your day?" Robin asked, turning around. Raven glanced up from her book.
"Fine. Kid Flash dropped in again. What about you?"
"Eh." He walked over and took a seat on the couch a few feet away from her. "Starfire discovered makeup. So that was interesting." He was slightly surprised to hear a chuckle out of Raven.
"Must have been the time of your life."
"Didn't you say you wanted some pointers on how to talk to people?" Robin realized, almost forgetting that he made the promise at sunrise.
"Oh, uh, yeah…if you're not too busy right now."
"It's just us two, Rae," Robin laughed. "I'm happy to teach you."
"Right. Well, what do you start with?"
"Hmm. I suppose we could…" Robin trailed off, thinking. "I know! Let's pretend we've never met before. We can keep the same names. What are you going to say in this situation?" He extended his hand and Raven reluctantly took it, shaking it.
"I'm Raven."
"And I'm Robin. Nice to meet you." He let go of her hand. "Where are you from?"
"A parallel dimension called Azarath." Robin frowned.
"Not like that."
"What? I'm telling the truth."
"Yeah, but—" Robin hesitated.
"But what?" Raven asked impatiently.
"You don't have to be so—black and white, sometimes. Especially when you're meeting new people. You could say something like, I'm not originally from here, but I live here in Titans Tower now."
"Whatever."
"Let's try again?" Robin asked, extending his hand. Raven took it once more, and they began.
"I'm not originally from here, but I—I live here now."
"That's cool. I'm not from here either. I come from the East. So what are you doing here?"
I fight supervillains and monsters to keep people safe, Raven thought, but she knew Robin would get upset if she said that. "I—I'm here just to, you know, help out with the police force. They could use somebody with my—powers."
"That's great! I'm actually here to do that too." The two talked for a few more minutes before Robin decided to break character.
"There, you see? Not that hard," he encouraged. Raven shrugged, per usual.
"Sometimes I wanna claw my eyes out with what I say."
"That's not uncommon," Robin replied. "But that's the basic gist of it. Just be polite, don't be blunt, and if all else fails, talk about the weather." Raven nodded in understanding.
"Thanks, Robin."
"No problem. Why were you wondering about this? If you don't mind me asking." She shifted a little at his words, but then turned to face him.
"I…don't really know how to explain this."
"You can try." He scooted closer to her on the couch. "You were there for me. I'll be here for you."
"I don't know what to do anymore. That's the simplest way I can put it."
"What to do with what?"
"You know…" she trailed off. Robin nodded.
"Your emotions?" he asked. Raven looked up.
"How did you—"
"I know how hard it was for you to go through that. I know why you kept it from us. It's always been like that for you, hasn't it?"
"Yeah," she murmured. "Always worried. Always having to keep everything to myself. Living in fear."
"Your father is gone now," he said. "We beat the odds. We did the impossible."
"You don't get it," she sighed, shaking her head. "Even if he's gone, he'll always be part of me. He just makes the worst parts of me that much more evil."
"Maybe. But that doesn't mean you need to think about him anymore," Robin surmised. "You don't have to do some drastic change of yourself to free yourself. You just have to focus on what makes you special." He watched as the empath went deep into thought yet again, and sat for a few moments in silence.
"You're right. I don't have to live with this burden anymore," she realized. "I can…have a life. Try new things."
"And make new friends by talking to them," Robin joked. "You should definitely explore. Go out into the city more. Maybe play video games with us sometime."
"I'm not wasting time on video games," came the sharp reply.
"Some things never change." Robin stood up and looked at the windows, a bit of night rain starting to splash against the glass. "It's getting late. I'm going to go get some rest."
"I'll stay up. I don't need that much sleep anyway."
"Alright, just don't wear yourself out."
"Robin?" Raven called out.
"Yeah?"
"Thank you," she said, giving him a small smile.
"No. Thank you," he said, and disappeared into the hallway. Raven thought about his words. It was true that she had already began trying new things. After their talk in the morning, she had made a promise to herself to pay more attention to her friends, to be more open, and to generally just relax. In truth, her meditation sessions were getting shorter and shorter, since the turmoil that stormed inside her for so long was beginning to calm. It was more of her own conscious worrying that caused stress now. She hovered over to the counter, pouring the last of the tea. Taking a sip, she gazed out the window. The rain had stayed at a constant drizzle, and a small crescent moon illuminated the bay. She turned her palms upward, looking at her hands and wrists. No red symbols. No burning sensation. And there weren't any to come, either. She saw her own reflection in the glass, the normally bland expression staring back at her. But there was something different about it. It seemed a little more free. A little more peaceful. A little more hopeful. Drinking the last of the tea, she put her hood up and walked back to the stairs. She took one last look behind her at the moon, then closed the door.
