Chapter 3
I myself needed the advice of a dead man; whilst the counsel given by his portrait may have been the same; I did take all of half a minute at his marble tomb. That as it had done for almost a year ago guarded Hogwarts. And although the headmasters office may be my office, I still called it his; this was much to Minerva's annoyance.
It was in the headmaster's office that she had finally found me, I had been wondering the grounds waiting – no hoping - for some divine inspiration may occur to me – but the gods were as stubborn as always – and since Minerva McGonagall was one person who I had no wish to speak to at a time when I would have preferred to be at the top of the astronomy tower. Still I had to listen to her opinion; maybe she would think of something I had not.
"Severus? Headmaster, you have been somewhat distant since returning from Bill and Fleur's wedding." She waited for a reply which was not uttered. "For God's sake Snape speak to me! What's going on inside that head of yours?" I briefly looked at her as I attempted to turn away and look at anything else at all. I could feel myself subconsciously pinching the dark mark; whatever message I was sending, she seemed to receive and understand. "What's he done now?" I'd only ever heard Albus use the annoyed parent tone when trying to deal with the dark lord's plans. Once it would have been amusing, but not today.
"He's given me an ultimatum, Minerva; either re-join the ranks or let Hogwarts be destroyed. I find myself between a rock and a hard place." Our eyes met for a moment I knew she could see the what-should-I-do scream from my eyes. She sighed.
"What did Albus say?" She pointed to the now sleeping portrait of Albus Dumbledore who hung directly behind the chair I avoided sitting in at all cost.
"The same as usual; do what you believe to be right, my boy. Remember your decision will shape you, mould you, make you more than you are. I always knew that one day you would to choose between what is right and what is easy."
"He said that to me once," Minerva scrutinized the sleeping portrait.
"You said that to all of us didn't you?" I myself turned an accusing glance at the painted headmaster. Still he slept.
"What are you doing to do?" it seemed a fairly obvious question; so simple yet so difficult to answer.
"I've got ten more hours Minerva I can put this off a little longer, can't I?"
"If you must, headmaster; but not too long. I don't want to be replacing you just yet." Despite the almost warning tone she had used I could tell Minerva meant it in a light-hearted manner.
Maybe I could convince myself to go to Godric's Hallow – maybe Lily could talk some sense into me. As unlikely as that last part was, I hadn't been to her grave since Albus died; I couldn't make myself believe that both the ones I loved most had been forcibly taken from me.
I took a Thestral to Godric's Hallow – no matter which one I took it always knew to land outside the ruined house of the late Potter's. I allowed the creature to graze the back streets for leftover meat; whilst I went directly to the grave of Lily Evans; I was not looking forward to the mental conversation I would be having.
I always knew it would be a dark evening even without my melancholy attitude. The sky matched the clouds, which in turn matched the silent eeriness of the empty churchyard. No matter how I looked at this; they all screamed danger is coming, even my unnaturally dark eyes. I ignored the warnings that would have forced me away from this grave; her grave, Lily's grave. As usual I placed a lily on her grave and a black rose on James' – it was my form of an apology; the only sign of Slytherin sentimentality.
"Lily I need help," as usual there was no audible response but in my mind I heard a rather sarcastic: I know.
"You know what he's asked of me?"
"Of course I do, Sev."
"What should I do?"
"What did Albus say?"
"The usual," I was deliberately vague.
"Than that is what you do,"
"What do you mean?"
"Do what is right, or what is easy," in my mind I could see her lifting her right and left hands respectively.
"What is right is never easy,"
"Exactly."
"So I do what is right?"
"If you think it is,"
"Do you think its right?"
"Depends if your drunk or not,"
"For once not."
"Than its right," I saw her in mind, smiling; well more like grinning like a Cheshire cat. I subconsciously checked my
watch, and was immediately pleased that I had done so; I only had two hours left.
I didn't really care if my time keeping had gotten worse; I just knew that I had a reply to give to the dark lord. After apologising to both Lily and James for keeping them from their rest, I ran back to the Thestral; which glared at me – probably for taking too long – as I ordered it back to Hogwarts. I could feel myself beginning to panic rather ominously.
"Minerva!" I yelled as I gave the Thestral back to Hagrid. I saw her graceful appearance before one of the large stones that gave the front gates its magnificence. "Has there been any word?"
"Only this, Severus." I knew I was running out of time before Hogwarts was damaged; Voldemort never gave additional time to anyone – least of all someone who had `betrayed' him. I didn't betray him, I spied on him; I infiltrated his inner circle, I lied to him. But in doing so I became less of the human I was.
I gasped slightly as she handed me the overly folded parchment; it read: "I hope you have made up your mind Severus. Or else Hogwarts will find its headmaster meeting a grisly death, again. You have half an hour to meet us at Malfoy Manor, Snape." We both stared at the parchment for a moment; I decided almost immediately to floo to Malfoy Manor; I didn't need the trauma of dealing with all the Malfoys. However, given the circumstances it was inevitable.
