Grimmjow woke with his head pounding. Prying his eyes open to observe his surroundings, he found himself half naked with drawings all over his torso. These doodles included spirals around his nipples and giants smiley faces on each pectoral. His belly button was colored in and there was some incomprehensible handwriting all over his abs. 'Fuuuuck, is this sharpie? God it's gonna take for fuckin' ever to get off!' Grimmjow groaned and rolled over only to find he couldn't. He shot straight up, bad idea by the way, and whipped his head side to side, also a bad idea.
Gripping his head trying to stop the pounding he found that he had crashed on his bed and was sandwiched by his two best friends Stark and Ulquiorra. Stark had a penis drawn on his face along with harry potter glasses and the classic curly mustache; wearing nothing but the Hello Kitty boxers he had received as a gag gift from his boyfriend Shinji. He turned to Ulquiorra and let a bark of laughter escape his lips. 'So, Qui's the prankster, huh?' he thought groggily as he pried Ulquiorra's hands open to reveal the weapon. Clutched in his hands was a black sharpie.
Chuckling to himself, Grimmjow crawled off the bed and attempted to stand. 'Damn, my stomach and head are killing me. Urgh, need aspirin. And a toilet.' he thought as he rushed to the bathroom in his apartment and threw open the lid to the toilet, allowing his stomach to unload its contents. Huffing and puffing he grabbed some toilet paper and wiped his mouth, flushing the toilet afterwards.
He stood, head still throbbing like it was the bass speaker in a club, but his stomach felt somewhat better. Opening his mirror cabinet in the bathroom, he grabbed the aspirin bottle and shut the door and stopped, frozen by his reflection.
"WHAT THE FUUUUUCK!" Grimmjow screamed. He had every right to because staring back at him was a total freak. His hair, oh god his gorgeous blue hair had PINK FUCKIN' HIGHLIGHTS!
"FUUUUCK! I'M GONNA MURDER YOU GUYS! RIP OPEN YOUR STOMACHS AND FEAST ON THE ENTRAI-!" Grimmjow's roaring and fuming was cut short when he stomped into the kitchen to see Ulquiorra's long time girlfriend, Orihime, cooking breakfast in just her bra and panties.
"Good morning, Grimmjow! Would you like some bacon and eggs? The waffles are almost done!" she chirped, dancing about the kitchen like she owned the place. Grimmjow wasn't stopped by the fact that an almost completely naked bodacious babe was giving him a free show, he didn't swing hat way believe it or not, no, it was because she had the same ridiculous bubble-gum pink colored streaks in her hair.
Orihime piled a plate high with bacon, eggs, and a couple of waffles covered in butter and syrup and danced over to Grimmjow, pecking his cheek and ushering his confused ass over to a chair at the bar in front of the sink. "Now eat." She demanded. And he did what he was told, but he was still utterly confused.
First of all, why was Hime cooking breakfast? Everyone knew she was a terrible cook and the only person in the world besides herself that could stomach her food was Qui. But right now, he was starving and the food smelled and looked to good to be true, so he wasn't going to complain. Secondly, who dyed their hair? And last but not least, why wasn't she wearing any clothes?
As he took an aspirin and began to cut into one of the waffles, it all came rushing back. Like a movie, scenes flashed before his eyes. Last night went a little something like this:
He arrived home to find his last paycheck had bee mailed to him. He grinned widely, recalling the days events. Excited, pumped and ready to get a move on, he barged into his apartment and threw everything in the small coffee table in his living room/kitchen area, rushing to the shower, stripping his clothes off as he went.
After finishing, Grimmjow remembered getting dressed and hearing banging on his door. It was Nnoitra and his girlfriend Neliel along with Stark and Shinji. Qui and Orihime followed soon after.
After they had a couple of beers in Grimm's apartment; they headed out around seven o'clock. After hitting up multiple bars and clubs until two in the morning, Nnoitra and Nel left claiming they had urgent business to attend. 'Psh, yeah right, unless fucking each other senseless is urgent business.' Grimmjow had thought. Shinji left when everyone reached Grimm's apartment giving the 'I need at least six solid hours of sleep before I go to work tomorrow, and I know I'm not going to get any if I stay with the horn-dog of a boyfriend much longer' excuse.
On their way home they had picked up two twelve packs of Red Stripe beer and a couple different tequilas. As soon as they entered the apartment Orihime grabbed the tequila and bet Grimmjow she could drink him under the table and if he lost the bet, she could dye his hair whatever color she wanted. Grimmjow being the proud male he was, didn't back down. After a series of shots Grimmjow caved, not knowing how he had lost to that little twig of a girl.
Apparently he had stated his thought out loud because Stark replied "I think she stores it in her boobs." setting Grimm into a fit of laughter, until he saw Orihime disappear and come back with a hair dye box. 'Shit, had she been planning this the entire time?' Grimmjow thought as fear crawled up his spine. "Don't worry, I wasssn gonna… always plan…uhh… I was gonna do this in my hair, but now*hic*now we can do it TOGETHER!" the devil women exclaimed drunkenly as she grabbed Grimmjow by the forearm and dragged him into the bathroom. Stark and Qui followed, a wide grin on Stark's face and amusement sparkling in Ulquiorra's deep green eyes.
Grumbling, Grimmjow allowed nasty smelling goo to be run through his hair and sat patiently for the 15 minutes, all the while shooting death glares at his friends who were snickering and taking pictures with their phones. When the timer went off, both Hime and Grimmjow rinsed their hair, he didn't even dare look at himself in the mirror. He stormed to the kitchen and grabbed a beer, sat on the coach and pouted 'I can't believe I just let her dye my hair. Fuck, I don't even wanna know what I look like!'
The rest of the gang followed his example, minus the pouting part when Orihime jumped up onto the coffee table, her now orange and pink hair billowing around her making her look adorable and frightening at the same time.
Orihime claimed that since she was the champion of all things alcoholic, she got to choose what game they played next. The guys murmured their agreement.
"I wanna play ssstrip poker!" she slurred out, a blush spreading across both her and Qui's faces. Grimmjow just laughed, his mood instantly lightening when poker was mentioned. Grimmjow loved poker, even though he was only okay at it.
The game ensued with Ulquiorra being the winner still completely clothed in his tight black v-neck, dark blue skinny jeans, and white converse. Grimmjow came in second only losing his Grey polo, black pumas and army green cloth belt, faded blue jeans still on. Orihime and Stark tied for last, both left in their underwear. Stark would have been third if Ulquiorra hadn't stopped Orihime from taking off her bra, claiming that those were for his eyes only. Grimmjow went off, laughing so hard he almost peed himself, tears flowing freely from his eyes. Stark would have laughed too, only he had passed out, head hitting the table with a solid 'thunk'.
Qui helped Grimmjow lug the brown haired narcoleptic to Grimm's room, tossing him on the bed. Grimmjow flopped right next to him and immediately passed out.
Grimmjow glared at his empty plate having eaten the waffles and eggs; practically inhaling the bacon. He was shaken from his trance when Stark followed by Ulquiorra entered the kitchen.
Stark sat next to Grimm after shoveling waffles and bacon onto his plate and began to dig in. "You know" Grimm stated "you really should get some eggs, filled with protein and vitamins and shit." Through a mouthful of waffle, Stark mumbled back "Hate eggs."
Chuckling, Grimmjow said "That's probably why you're so fuckin' tired all the time, you don't get enough protein or any of your essential vitamins."
Ulquiorra, who had been silent up until that moment, said "I do believe that's not it, Grimmjow. I'm fairly positive it has to do with a certain blond that the narcoleptic can't seem to leave alone." A light smirk playing at his lips, Stark replied "Bull's-eye."
Orihime giggled as Ulquiorra grabbed her and pulled her in for a chaste kiss. Once they broke apart, Ulquiorra took off his shirt and wrangled Orihime into it, the latter giggling the entire time.
Grimmjow laughed at the scene before him. 'God, I love my friends' he thought as he ran his hand through his hair… his hair… "Wait one goddamn minute! What the hell am I supposed to do about my hair, you guys? I can't go outside looking like fuckin' cotton candy!" Grimmjow practically whined. Practically, because Grimmjow Jaegerjaques DIDN'T whine.
"It's called a hat." Stark said through a yawn that he had attempted to stifle. Both Qui and Hime laughed at that, because it was soooo fuckin' funny.
"Screw you guys, I hate all of you."Grimmjow grumbled as he went to go fetch a baseball cap. Maybe he could wash it out before the weekend was over, but from the grins on his friend's faces, he doubted it would happen.
AN
Sorry, Orihime is a bit ooc in this chapter, but hey I needed someone to be the initiator and I love Ulquiorra and Orihime together, they're just too adorable ;P
Also, you pronounce Grimm's nickname for Ulquiorra like this: kwee. Just fyi :)
I figured Grimm probably likes to tease his friends (though he seems to be teased the most in this chapter) so having him give Ulquiorra a girly/cutesy nickname seemed to fit :D
GrimmIchiness is gonna go down in the next chapter, so be patient babes and know that Kat loves you 3
(=^.^=)
