TRTSS15: Thanks for the Memories!
Disclaimer: R1/2, SM, ST and other genres belong to their respective owners.
Note: This is a multi-genre story.
Special: This is a semi-retelling of the movie and OAVs of the Ranma ½ series. Enjoy!
Part 3: "Not-So-Great Expectations".
Meanwhile, Ranma was having lunch with Kirin…
"How is it?" Kirin asked, as he ate his meal. "As my future bride, I want to make sure that you become accustomed to your 'treats'."
"I can pretty eat anything," Ranma replied between bites. "I remember when I hate nothing more than moss and grub to survive on, when I was going through my own intense, physical training moments. This? Piece of cake."
"I see…"
Pause.
"I must say that you're willingness to come with me is surprising," Kirin said, as his servants Yin and Yang, a pair of twins who typically spar as a pair, served pickled, vegetarian additions to a primary rice diet.
"Why is that?" Ranma asked, as he ate his meal. It wasn't the worst thing he has eaten in his long life, but he was cordial about accepting an invitation to dinner. "I want to get to know the person who I or some else will eventually defeat."
"Interesting outlook," Kirin said.
"Yes, it's a basic stratagem in warfare that, if one accepts an invitation to dine with a potential enemy, one takes it."
"To study the motives and behavior patterns."
"Precisely. Because I am telling you right now: I'm not going to marry you without a reason to do so."
"Which means that you would marry me out of necessity, than out of love."
"Precisely. I'm surprised that you didn't go out with Monlon over there…"
Kirin glances over towards one of his warriors Monlon, who was gently playing music with her Chinese lute.
"Well, um, she is a servant and a valued warrior, nothing more."
"You mean, you haven't even tried to…you know."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, a healthy young man like yourself should be able to 'date' any attractive lady, and I see one sitting…over there."
Monlon giggles a bit, as she continue to strum her instrument…
"You know, if you don't want to ask her for a night cap, I think I will-"
BAM!
Kirin stabs the table with his chopsticks.
"I will forbid it," Kirin said. "You are to be MY bride-"
"About that, man," Ranma said. "Do I even LOOK like a girl? I mean, unless…I don't know…you're into men…"
"No, I'm not!" Kirin said. "If fate brought me here to you because you have your half of the special scroll, it is because I am to marry your female form. And as soon as I contact the Musk Dynasty, I will make sure that I will consummate our marriage…as man and wife."
"And you think that I would let THAT happen? You want to marry me, but you are offering NOTHING that I want. Money? I can make more than you as a pit fighter on the streets of Tokyo. Fame? Prestige? I can gain all that on more own. And as for having a royal title: there are plenty of royal babes all over the world that I can sweep off their feet, including those in my own country. So, give me something to work with."
"I see…"
Kirin thinks for a moment, before an idea dawns the Prince of Nekonron.
"I and my fellow warriors can teach you are martial arts style."
"Now, you're talking my language," Ranma said. "Go on."
"By the dawn of the second day of our stay in Nekonron, we are to be married," said Kirin. "If you have not mastered our Art, you are to accept me as your husband willingly."
"Hey, why not?" Ranma said sarcastically. However, mentality, he was salivating at the chance to learn from the Seven Lucky God Martial Artists. He knew that they weren't the Seven Lucky Gods themselves, but were mortals who patterned their style off of the real deal…
"But, if I accept your proposal, that means that I can have the run of this place?" Ranma asked.
"You may, if you honor our agreement."
"With no unreasonable request turned down?"
"IF you honor our agreement."
"Okay, but if I can just ask for ONE MORE THING…?"
"WHAT is it?" Kirin said tiredly.
"I want it to be allowed that anyone who so deems it necessary, he or she have the right to claim my hand in mortal combat, at the wedding itself. And…if no one challenges your claim to my hand in marriage—ugh—then I am yours in full."
"You think someone will challenge me…for YOU?"
"Yep. If I know Akane, she is on her way to get me back."
"You are referring to the cute, yet scowling, girl that you stood next to back in your homeland?"
"Yes, yes I am."
Kirin laughs, however…
"Very well, you shall have your conditions honored."
"Thank you, Prince Kirin," Ranma said, as he bowed his head slightly. He then gets up.
"Where are you going?" Kirin asked, in a confused manner.
"Going to bed early," Ranma said, as he stretched his limbs. "After all, I only have one day to learn seven martial arts styles."
"Oh, I see. Then good night."
"'Night," Ranma said. He then turns towards Monlon.
"Shall we have a night cap?"
"We shall," Monlon said, as she gets up from her cushion.
"Wait, where are YOU going, Monlon?" Kirin asked, though he already knew what Ranma's intentions were.
"I will have…a night cap, of course, Lord Kirin."
"No, I forbid it-"
"Kirin, did you not agree to my proposal?" Ranma asked. "Is a prince a man of his word?"
"But…I want you pure when we wed!"
"Oh, don't worry, guy. You'll get my VIRGINAL girl side soon enough. Tonight, Monlon gets the male side. And besides, if you want me to sacrifice my life and liberty for you, I should be at least be allowed to enjoy my last…meal, as I am."
Kirin grits his teeth.
"Fine. GO!"
"Thank you, My Lord," Monlon said with a bow.
"Yeah, thanks, Kirin," Ranma said, as he slips his arms around Monlon's waist. "And you never know…she might show ME a few things that I might be able to use on our wedding night. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA-!"
And with that, Ranma and Monlon walk out of the dining room of Kirin's airship.
"Insolence!" Kirin said. "If the fates did not deem us to marry, I would slay him for his insult!"
Ebiten Wu, a small, mustached man whose martial arts involve fishing poles lean over towards a lightly armored, beard wearing man whose style involves the spear and halberd.
"Our Prince's future wife is GOOD, Daihakusei," Ebiten said.
"Indeed," said the spear wielder. "It will be curious how these events will unfold…
Young Ranma woke up, expecting to feel pain, though not as much as the pain that his so-called "un-cute fiancée" might give him.
"Ah, man," Y. Ranma said, as he tried to move, only to realize that he was being held in place. "What the-?"
"My apologies for your discomfort, Ranma," said as woman, as she stepped up from the shadows. She appeared to have a wrinkled nose of some kind, while sporting medium-length hair that was combed back a bit. On her right earlobe was some sort of ornamental jewelry, while she wore a similar black/gray jumpsuit with color around the collar area, where four, tiny "pips" were. On her chest, above her left breast was some sort of gold/silver arrowhead…
"But I could not run the risk of you injuring yourself or others."
"Where the hell I am, lady?" Y. Ranma demanded. "And what's wrong with your nose?"
"My…nose?"
"Yeah, it's all wrinkled and stuff."
"Ah," the woman said, as she smiles while nodding her head. "I was born like this, since I am…Bajoran."
"What's that?"
"It's…a different type of human, like the many types found on your home planet."
"'Planet'?" Y. Ranma said. Then something clicked in his head.
"You're…you're an alien?"
"Well, to you Terrans, yes. But here in my home star system, you are the aliens."
"Wow…"
Pause.
"Um, you're not going to, um, probe my butt or anything, are you?"
"Pardon?"
"Well, I read and heard that aliens would kidnap people for examination, which includes probing their butts."
"Well, rest assured, the people of Bajor do NOT probe…'butts'. Well, unless is for sexual gratification, I think…"
Y. Ranma blanches a bit at such a visual.
"But, I don't want to keep you here in Sickbay any longer than necessary."
"Okay, lady, then get me out of here."
"Only if I have your word that you do not cause trouble for anyone here, or attempt to escape this place."
"This…place?"
"Yes, right now, you are on a space station, far from your home planet of Earth."
"Wait, how did I get here, then?" Ranma asked.
"We're investigating a variety of possibilities. But, I don't think you need to be stuck here in the place…"
The woman then steps forward.
"I want your word of honor that you won't give me any headaches, until we resolve this crisis," the woman said.
"Um…"
"It's that, or you stay put, and be under the watch of Nurse Crusher."
"Who?"
"Me, Ranma-sama," Kodachi said with a smile, as she enters Sickbay, while putting away data modules called "Isolinear Chips".
"Gah!" Y. Ranma said.
"Kodachi, I wanted to talk to Ranma alone, first," said the woman.
"I apologize, Captain, but Counselor Dax is ready to see Ranma-sama," Kodachi said. "I just wanted to tell you that."
"Thank you," the woman said, as she turns to face Y. Ranma again. "We want to see if you are mature enough to be responsible for your actions, which is why I want you to see a counselor."
"You mean 'a shrink'?"
"Yes."
"Well, if it gets me out of here, fine."
"I want your word, Ranma. No causing trouble."
Y. Ranma sighed.
"Fine. You have my word that I WILL behave…for now."
"Thank you," the woman said, as she tapped a featureless panel, deactivating the force field that held Y. Ranma in place.
BLIP!
Y. Ranma felt the pressure on his body disappear.
"Hey, neat," Y. Ranma said, as he sits up, before moving his arms by stretching them.
"By the way, my name is 'Kira Nerys'," Kira said. "I am the commanding officer of this space station."
"Oh, so that's why Kodachi called you…'Captain'," Y. Ranma said, as he looks at a happily busy Kodachi, who was humming a pleasant tune.
"That is correct," Kira said. She then motions for the security chief to step forth.
"I believe you as Chief Kiima know each other," Kira said.
"Yeah, I do," Y. Ranma said with suspicion. "She kidnapped my…um, friend, took her face as a disguise, and almost killed her."
Kira looks over towards Kiima, who shrugged her shoulders.
"It was a long time ago, Captain," Kiima said.
"No, that was a few months ago!" Ranma yelled.
"Ranma, those events that you are associating Commander Kiima with occurred a few centuries ago," said a familiar voice.
All eyes turned towards Nodoka and Sasami. Having heard about the incident, they returned from Bajor to see to Ranma's well being, not knowing what was happening.
"M-Mom?" Y. Ranma said in surprise.
"Oh, my son," Nodoka said, as she rushed to hold her child. "Thank the Great Maker that you are safe."
"Um, thanks?" Y. Ranma replied.
"Ranma, my darling," said Sasami said, as she hugged Y. Ranma. "Never worry me so again."
"Um, excuse me?" Y. Ranma said, in a confused look. "Who are you, lady?"
"L-lady?" Sasami said, as she was taken aback a bit. "But, Ranma…don't tell me you've forgotten me…YOUR WIFE?"
"What?" Ranma exclaimed.
Tbc.
