A/N: I know that in no way is Ashley a lesbian in the series, but she just wrote herself like this, I can't even take credit for it. It came fully formed out of the ether as I wrote. It wouldn't have worked using Kaidan, he didn't have the personality for the relationship described in the following pages. So take it with a grain of salt and understand that I have given her a different set of motivations. That is all!

Music: If You Fear Death, One Day as a Lion

I'm the crescent, the sickle, so sharp the blade
I'm the flick of the shank that opened your veins
I'm the dusk, I'm the frightening calm
I'm a hole in the pipeline, I'm a road side bomb

Bioware owns these characters.


Earth Alliance Headquarters

James had come to collect her for something urgent, something not having to do with the tribunal. People were running around the building like something serious was going down. She ran to keep up with Vega, having a pretty good idea about what was going on. Anderson filled her in when they met up, Vega trailing behind with an ear out for details.

"There's something coming, Shepard. Something big."

"Fuck. I knew it. We aren't even close to prepared, David. Shall I go ahead and practice my too-little-too-late speech?"

"They're just scared, Shepard. They haven't seen what you've seen. You know more about this enemy than anyone. You've faced down a reaper. Hell, you spoke to one – and then you blew the damn thing up."

"Doesn't help us now." Politicians ruined everything. All this time, wasted.

They walked into the hallway preceding the meeting room and Vega put his hand out. "Good luck in there, Shepard." He said. Their eyes met and she nodded. Could be the last time she saw him, if they gave her ship back. A shame. She'd gotten used to him decorating her room, trying to cheer her up.

"Anderson." A familiar voice said. The three of them turned and saw a pretty girl in blue armor walking toward them. She saw Shepard and stopped, shock on her face. "Oh, um, I didn't realize that-"

"That I was on Earth, in jail? Get real, Ash. Not unless you live under a rock. And from the looks of it, you don't." Shepard eyed her up and down, finally resting her eyes on her feet. "Seriously? Heels on your armor?"

"What?" Ashley Williams said defensively. "I can still fight in it."

Shepard just shook her head as Anderson said, "Lieutenant Commander, how did it go in there?"

"Just waiting for a decision. We'll see what they say to her. Guess I'll know soon enough."

"The Reapers are coming, you know. Put on some real shoes before you twist an ankle and fall down a flight of stairs." Shepard said. There was some unresolved business between the two of them that had obviously not gotten any better.

"Bitter much, Shep? You know I look good."

"Only when you're not wearing a costume. Or anything at all, when it comes right down to it." She pointed look she gave Williams had James coughing to cover up a surprised laugh as she turned and walked into the meeting room.

"Bitch." Ashley muttered, her face red. But her tone belied other feelings.

"You know the Commander well, I take it?" James asked, wondering how much Shepard's comment had been hinting at.

"You figure that out all by yourself?" Ashley said. She turned to the Lieutenant and looked him over. "Hmmph." She turned and walked away, a clear case of sour grapes. "Come on. I've been told to take you with me." She called over her shoulder.


Tribunal Meeting Room

"You brought me here to confirm what you already know. The reapers are here." The murmurs of surprise made her shake her head. "We've wasted all our preparation time with this tribunal jackassery. We need help, and lots of it!"

Before anyone could respond, the window went dark and a several reaper destroyers lowered into her view, landing a distance away.

"Get down!" She screamed, diving for cover. Anderson immediately complied, but the most turned around to look out the large window. A destroyer's laser cannon lit up, casting a faint red glow across the room. The concussive blast blew Shepard back into something hard, knocking her senseless for a few seconds, a deep boom reaching them a moment later. Forcing herself back into full consciousness, she fumbled around to find out which way was up again, finally rising to her knees. She shook her head.

Dimly, through ringing ears, she heard David's voice calling her name. A hand pulled her arm until she was on her feet again, still unsteady but pulling herself together. She and Anderson made their way out of the building, checking for survivors as they went, but finding none. After locating a small weapons cache, they fought a few husks and cannibals; nothing they couldn't handle. The biggest fight was the internal one, watching their home planet being invaded. Shepard had rarely been to Earth, aside from her training periods and of course the last six months, but it still pissed her off.

She'd warned them. Fuckin' civvies aren't worth the trouble sometimes. Even as she thought that, she knew it wasn't fair. But the extent of her bitterness over this turn of events was deep and well-founded.

A part of her was relieved, though, if she were being honest with herself. The fight was back on, and she was in her element after months of frustration. Being able to run, to kill her enemies, to feel the sting of returned fire made her heart pound with excitement. She couldn't deny that it felt really good. If only it hadn't happened like this.

Reapers were everywhere, blasting into the building they were trying to escape from. Without her armor Shepard felt incredibly vulnerable, especially scaling the rooftops like they were. An enormous reaper landed in the bay just beyond them and began laying waste to the opposite shore, destroying a dreadnaught. The concussive blast blew the front off of the disintegrating building they were climbing down, and she slid several stories to the ground.

Without wasting a moment, she hopped to her feet, taking the first few steps carefully in case she'd broken something. She and Anderson then ran to the water line, with fire and fallout raining all around. They found a radio to contact the Normandy and gave them their location, then held the line for a few intense minutes against repeated cannibal attacks.

Nothing good ever came from a Batarian, Shepard thought as she sent a combat drone into the pack. Those things just prove it.

They finally saw the Normandy sweeping in like a vision from heaven. Elated to be boarding her ship again, Shepard took a flying leap into the open cargo hold where it hovered a few feet away. Inside, she could see other soldiers, Ashley and James Vega among them. Turning back to Anderson, she called out, "Come on! Let's go!"

To her surprise, Anderson shook his head. "No, Shepard!" he shouted back. "Get to the Citadel and get all of the support you can, then come back. I'm staying here." He tossed her a set of dog tags. "You're reinstated as of this morning. Now go!" He ran in the other direction.

She watched him for a few seconds, then backed off as the door closed, the surface of Earth rapidly dropping away. "You heard him. Let's move!"

Vega came charging up to her. "We're leaving? How can you-"

"Stand down, Lieutenant!" Shepard commanded. They had become very buddy-buddy while she had been in lockdown, but he needed to know he was on her ship now. "I don't have any problem going on suicide missions, but only if they'll actually accomplish something. It's not time for that yet. We're going to get help and then we're coming back, like Anderson said."

"Fuck that, he wouldn't order us away. This is loco! We need to go back, to f-"

She got right up in his face. Despite the fact that he towered over her, he backed away a step. "That's enough! I don't want to leave either, but there are things we have to do first. Grab a bunk and settle in. If you don't want to stay, you can catch a ride back from the Citadel."

Joker's voice came in over the comm. "Got a message coming in from Hackett. It's pretty distorted, but EDI's trying to clean it up. Sending it your way."

Shepard walked to the terminal, ignoring James' roar of frustration as she punched up the message. He'd have to deal with it by himself. Commander Shepard was no nose-wiper. She had her ship back and a war to fight. He'd shape up or he'd wash out, as many had before him.

Hackett was ordering them to Mars… where she would see an old friend. "Suit up, guys. We have a quick stop to make."

James took the next hour during their flight to Mars to calm down, to mentally prepare himself for the fight. Checking his armor and weapons usually did the trick, and this day was no exception. Eventually he decided he would just talk to Shepard about it later, that way he could just focus on the mission. That was the immediate thing, and James Vega was all about the present moment.

Ashley walked up and leaned against the shuttle in her form-fitting armor, studiously ignoring James where he loomed on the other side of the doorway. He wondered what was up with her jealous attitude. It's not like the Commander did more than idle flirting with him, and whatever had happened between her and Shepard was obviously way over. He couldn't help taking a jab at her.

"So Ash, how long have you known the Commander?" He asked.

She glared at him. "Why are you talking to me like you know me, meathead?"

"Because it makes you show your bitch, Ash. Maybe you shouldn't make it so easy for him." Shepard walked up, loading her rifle. She motioned for them to enter ahead of her and James settled in to pilot them to the surface of Mars.

A part of Shepard was ecstatic to be in action again. Being on her ship again, in command no less, was far more than she'd hoped for when she woke up this morning. In fact, she'd stopped hoping for anything for a long time.

Seeing James in full armor for the first time, she got the feeling that he was always going to end up on her team. From the very beginning she had felt way too comfortable talking to him, which lent itself to the kind of forced intimacy that long-term missions with a small team provided. That thought brought her to the uncomfortable presence of Ashley, who obviously was considering James a threat. She couldn't figure out why; did she think they'd get back together, after what happened after Virmire? Good soldiers shouldn't be delusional.

At this moment, Ashley spoke up. "I don't like this, Shep. Going into this with no Intel, you haven't seen action in six months and who knows what his deal is," She jerked her head toward the cockpit. "The situation is far from ideal."

"Ideal?" Shepard looked at her like she was crazy. "Earth just got invaded by Reapers and you're wondering if I-" she pointed at her chest, "have lost my edge, and about his service record? If anything, I should be wondering how the hell it is that you got promoted for sitting around and decorating your armor while I got arrested. I bet there's a hell of a story behind that.

"So how about this for the situation: I was born ready, so was James, and you'll follow my goddamn orders when we get there without all the paranoid bullshit."

Ashley shook her head. "You've changed. Hell, it might not even be you in there. I can't help but wonder if Cerberus-"

Shepard interrupted, stepping so close that Ashley backed up. "I told Cerberus to go fuck themselves - literally. Do you want me to say the same to you?"

Ashley didn't say anything, just turned away with an expression of doubt still painted across her face. In the cockpit, James smiled in satisfaction.


Three days later

James was still pissed, checking his gear with angry, abrupt motions. His work table was a mess and he had no patience to clean it up right then.

He had really gotten to like the Commander over the last few months, but the last few days had shattered all of his illusions. Leaving Earth, getting chewed out in front of everyone, and then the way she hadn't let him fight on Mars, taking instead the one who accused her of colluding with Cerberus.

Though Ashley'd gotten some karmic backlash big time with that cyborg in the end. He almost felt sorry for her.

It also didn't help that he knew Shepard was probably right about it all. He couldn't fault her for following orders, but she was Shepard, for fuck's sake. He'd imagined that she could tell the brass to go piss up a rope from time to time. Especially now that she had her ship back, the command line weakened to the breaking point, he'd assumed she'd just do whatever the hell she felt like to win against the Reapers. Hell, she was even a Spectre. James wished she'd act like it a bit more.

But she hadn't. She'd followed orders like a good girl. Instead of rushing into the battle with all guns blazing, she had them running all over the place collecting resources like it was a new hobby. Where was the fun in that? It was like he'd stepped out of the real world and into some crazy alternate universe.

Their brief stop at the Citadel had shown him how precarious their position was. Seeing the bright, clean Presidium for the first time had turned his stomach. No way were these soft bureaucrats gonna understand what was going on on Earth. It had been just that, though, that had convinced him to stay on the Normandy. Since Shepard was dead-set on collecting resources from all over the galaxy, she was probably going to some pretty rough places. He had a feeling that these people would double-cross her in a second.

He was still pretty disappointed with the first days of his TDY on the Normandy. The most action he'd seen, aside from a few Cerberus kills and a shuttle crash, was when she agreed to spar him. He hadn't ever seen her as hot as she was down in the cargo bay, bleeding from his fist. He smirked, thinking about the fat lip she'd sported the next day. What a woman. She reminded him of an older girl at his high school who kept getting into fights, Lola. He'd called Shepard that, and she seemed to like it. Didn't help with how disappointed he was with this turn of events. He was definitely conflicted when it came to her.

At least they were on their way to Palaven, which was also being pummeled by the Reapers. But they were only there to rescue one person, a politician no less. He was surprised she hadn't learned her lesson on Earth, so there must be a good reason for it that he wasn't privy to. Maybe after they finished there, he'd finally get some answers.


Palaven: Menae

Palavin was glowing in swaths of burning red as Cortez stealthily flew them to its moon, Menae. Shepard found herself wishing that wherever Garrus was, he was okay. A look at Liara told her that she was thinking the same thing. They landed in sober silence, clearing the landing area of husks before Shepard ran up to a Turian soldier to ask for directions to the command post.

Despite the sight of Palavin burning overhead, it felt good to fight alongside Turians again. The human prejudice against them for what was really just a misunderstanding, and one decades old, had always bothered her. They worked well alongside humans since then. It was just unfortunate that so many of her own kind held grudges.

Shepard was glad that she didn't. Cerberus didn't count. Or the Collectors. Well... no grudges in this case, anyway.

They fought their way to the base, the adrenaline giving her a rise like it always did. Sprinting for cover, tossing grenades down the rock face, watching husks burst like popcorn… it was great to be back. This kind of thing wasn't Liara's strength, but she was still a solid fighter and kept up with them just fine. James howled and raced after her, obviously enjoying himself too. She liked fighting with him already; it was rare to see someone get as charged up as she got in a firefight.

As she stepped through the barricade onto the command post, she looked up to the burning planet hanging in the sky above them and tried to send Garrus good vibes, wherever he was.

They found General Corinthus in one of the prefab shelters near the center of the base, hunched over a terminal readout. "Commander Shepard! They said you'd come, but I didn't believe it."

"I'm here for the Primarch. We're trying to put together an alliance to fight the Reapers." Shepard said, getting right to business.

The General shook his head. "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but his transport was shot down not too long ago. He was… a good friend."

"I'm sorry for your loss. But that's all the more reason why we need to band together and drive the Reapers back where they came from." Shepard spoke passionately. "Who is next in line?"

"The line of succession is very clear," the General said. "But our losses have been heavy. I'm not sure who's alive or MIA."

"I can help with that." A familiar voice said from behind them. The other Turian saluted Garrus as he walked up the ramp into the shelter.

"Garrus!" Relief washed over Shepard. "You're alive." She reached out a hand to him, which he took in both of his. They looked at each other for a moment, Shepard finally breaking into a smile she couldn't contain. Seeing him there gave her a sudden feeling of invincibility, as if the universe had been spinning wildly but was now put to rights.

She motioned James forward. "James, this is Garrus Vakarian. He helped us stop the Collectors. He's a hell of a soldier."

The two shook hands, Garrus wondering if they had cross-bred a krogan with a human to produce this one. Then he greeted Liara and turned back to Shepard, answering her question from before. "The next in line is Victus."

"That name has come across my desk." Liara spoke up. "He's known for results, but not well liked by command."

Garrus nodded in agreement, still looking at Shepard. "He tends to play loose with regs. Sometimes he pulls off risky maneuvers, and you know how command feels about that."

She sure did. Before she could reply, James said, "Sounds like one of our people. I like him already."

She looked quickly at the Lieutenant. That had literally been what she was just thinking. James shrugged, thinking her wide eyes were a reprimand.

"Where can we find him?" Shepard began, turning back to the task at hand. But before Garrus could answer, Joker came over the comm.

"Commander, we have a situation. The ship is shutting down and turning on systems randomly – and EDI's not responding!"

"Shit. We need you standing by in case we need to bug out, Joker. Liara, go back to the Normandy and see what you can do to help." Liara nodded to Shepard and ran off.

They were about to depart to where Garrus had been fighting alongside Victus that morning when Corinthus reported an enormous wave coming in. "We can't lose this position," Garrus said. "Come on!"

They ran to the barricade, where a turret waited. Delighted at the chance to use heavy equipment, she leaped up to it with a cheer as the first wave came streaming down from the sky and began to mow them down. She heard James echo her cry, tossing carnage into the pit beneath them, and behind all that racket, Garrus was announcing headshots with his usual flair.

Shepard hadn't had this much fun since before the Collector Base. The husks didn't stand a chance against their firepower; they never even got close enough to use their considerable melee power. Then a fireball landed that shook the barrier, a huge beast roaring from inside as the smoke cleared. Whatever it had once been, it was a monster now. It tore at the barrier with tremendous force, knocking her out of the turret and onto the ground below.

She heard her team cuss and shout her name as she rolled and ran for the nearest cover, pulling out her Mattock rifle. She popped her head up once, long enough to send out a combat drone, only to see the juggernaut charging her. She bolted out of her cover and made for the next one; the beast, too large to change directions quickly, skidded against the rock outcropping, sending pieces of stone flying. The brute was tough, but once her team made it to where she was the three of them quickly pulled it together, whittling down its armor.

She whooped in satisfaction as it roared its farewell. "Now we're having fun!" She shouted. She slapped palms with Garrus. "It's good to fight with you again. And you seem to be keeping up, James."

He gave her a sardonic look, standing as he was with husks all around his feet. She just laughed and turned to the south. "James, is that you breathing so heavy?"

"The atmosphere is a little thinner than I'm used to. I'll be alright. Adrenaline is better than oxygen any day."

Shepard shook her head. That was so like him, to say just what she would have said. The second time today, no less. She'd long thought that you never really got to know someone until you've fought alongside them, and James was certainly proving that.

They headed south from the base to where Garrus said he had last seen Victus. The going had been mostly quiet, the only action they saw was a few straggler husks and one Turian fighter crashing a few feet from them. James decided that now was as good a time as any to get some answers.

"Hey Lola, you really think this alliance is going to work? The Turians and the Salarians, the Asari, okay… but what about the Krogan and the Batarians? Where's the meat?"

Garrus answered. "The Batarians were hit first and are in no mood to play nice with anything the humans do, thanks to our fearless leader." At this, Shepard tossed him a semi-serious dirty look. "The Krogan we'll have to see about, but they don't have good relations with the races that inflicted the genophage on them."

"We've got to try, James. Working together is the only way to have a chance." Shepard said, sliding down a hill towards the camp, which they could finally see ahead.

"I don't know. When I think of those husks running all over New York, I wish I had never left." James said.

"There was no way to prepare for this. We just have to do our best." Shepard didn't want him to start getting down. He was turning out to be a great team member. He fought beside her and Garrus like he'd been doing it all along.

As they walked up the final incline to the camp, Garrus signaling a hold-fire, she looked across at James. He was indeed breathing heavy, his bulky armor lifting visibly as he trucked up the slope. He looked over at her just as she flicked her eyes up and down him with a little smile. She jogged ahead, leaving him to wonder what that had been all about.

Garrus heard her approach. "It's really good to see you, Shep. Sorry it had to take the Reapers to get you out of lockup."

"Thanks for writing, Garrus. It meant a lot to me to hear from you. Not many did."

"Of course. You've always been there for me, so it's the least I could do. I would have visited if it had been possible. Have you heard from Tali?"

She shook her head sympathetically. "Not since Earth. I get the impression she's pretty tied up with the Quarian government now, and you know how they are about aliens."

Garrus breathed heavily. "Yeah."

She grinned and put her hand on his shoulder. "You'll find each other again. I'd bet my life on it."

"Small comfort. You'd bet your life on a varren match if it gave you a thrill." Garrus waved at the guard to open the barrier.

"You know me well!" Shepard laughed. Then she looked up at Palaven and shook her head. "Why do we only meet at times like these?"

"Because we're the kind of beings that live on the crest of the wave, Shepard. We're the first to crash on the rocks."

She cocked her head to the side as they passed through the gate. "Why, Garrus, that's almost… poetic."

"I've been reading a lot. Tali secretly loves the arts, you know." Garrus raised his arm and pointed a tapered finger ahead. "That's Victus. Come on."

Shepard waved James forward, who had been lagging behind. The way she touched Garrus made him think they were very well acquainted. In fact, it seemed like she'd allow herself to get close to just about anyone… except him.


Thanks to the new reviews and follows. Con/crit still welcome.