I'm Here For You
It was now 11.30pm and the room was filled with a chorus of snores. Rory sighed and shifted so he was laying on his right side; he was yet to fall asleep. He had tried to sleep, but his mind was racing with thoughts. He had been going over dance steps in his head, which then lead to him thinking about his self-punishment for messing them up. That then drew his attention to the pain in his wrist. He then went over his interaction with Blaine in the bathroom. He was angry at himself for crying in front of Blaine. But he had felt so comfortable and safe in Blaine's arms, he had breathed in his scent and felt his heartbeat, it felt like all the pain in his life had disappeared
He rolled over again, his back getting sore from sleeping on the hard floor. This was getting ridiculous, the more he lay here the more uncomfortable he got. And the more uncomfortable he was the harder it was to go to sleep. He decided that there was no way he would be getting to sleep anytime soon, and he was sick of lying down, so he got up and quietly left the room.
He wandered the corridors for a while. It was the first time he felt safe walking around the school because there was nobody else around to harass or bully him. After completing a full tour of the school he decided to find a comfortable spot to sit and rest. He chose the library where he knew, from his hours of hiding from bullies, there were comfy couches. He settled down into one and curled up, the soft cushions being much more comfortable than his place on the floor. His eyes were heavy and they slowly drifted shut and he fell into a deep sleep.
...zzzz...
"You! Get out of my sight. I always knew something was wrong with you! You were a mistake after all. The larger man yelled at him, waving his hands around for dramatic effect.
Rory sighed and hung his head. He had just told his parents the truth. The secret he had kept from them for a whole year now. He hadn't told them yet because he knew this would be the reaction he received, but he had no choice but to tell them now because they had basically found out for themselves.
This whole thing started about a year ago. Rory had had a few girlfriends and he had really liked them, but he also noticed that he was attracted to guys as well. At first he had pushed those feelings aside and would curse at himself every time he would subconsciously start checking out a guy, but he eventually grew to accept the fact that he was bi.
His attraction towards one of his friends, Blake, was discovered to be mutual and they had quickly developed a secret relationship. It was a fairly open relationship, mostly they just became really good friends, but they often had heavy make out sessions. That is how his parents had found out. Rory had invited Blake over to play video games. They had started playing Mario Kart, but they soon forgot the game, snuggled together and started snogging. That is how they were found when his mother walked in with a pile of his clean washing.
He sent Blake home as his mother went downstairs and talked to his father. He had been called down a few minutes later and asked to explain himself. That was when he told them the truth. His mother sat with an expression that looked like a cross between shock and confusion. His father's face was clearly full of disgust and rage. That was when Rory knew that he was in for a rough night.
His father continued to hurl verbal abuse at him while he stood there with his head down.
"Didn't you hear me boy! I said get out of my sight!"
With that Rory stumbled backwards out of the room and ran upstairs to his bedroom. He closed the door and lay down on his bed and let the tears flow. He tried to stay quiet, but his sobs were loud. He cried like that for half an hour, tiring himself out, until he fell asleep. He was woken up hours later by the sound of heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. He listened as they came towards his door, paused, then his door was wrenched open. Rory lay as still as he could, pretending to be asleep, hoping that he would be left alone. Unfortunately his father moved closer and clasped his large hand roughly on Rory's shoulder, causing him to flinch, and turned him over so that he could look at him. Rory could smell the alcohol on his father and braced for the pain which he knew was about to come.
"You're a disgrace to this family!" Mr. Flanagan yelled as he pulled Rory up off of his bed.
Rory knew from past experience that there was no use in fighting back, it was better to just take the abuse.
Mr. Flanagan raised his arm and formed a fist, giving Rory a split second to brace himself for the impact. Within seconds the fist connected to his face with such force that Rory was sent flying backwards into his dresser and landed in a heap on the ground. His father stepped towards him, drew his leg back and dug his foot into Rory's side. Rory gasped at the pain, and felt tears fall from his eyes. His father got in few more good kicks before grabbing his arm and pulling him up to his feet.
"Never again will you bring a boy into this house and do disgraceful acts! Not anywhere else either. If I ever see you with that boy, or any other boy, again expect pain."
Rory could see his mother standing in the doorway looking conflicted. Rory could see that she didn't want to watch her child being beaten up, but he knew that she would not get in the way of his father. He was controlling and his mother couldn't stand up for herself, let alone Rory. His father gave him one last punch to the face and left the room taking Rory's mother with him.
...zzz...
Rory woke with a start. His breathing was sporadic and his face wet from tears. He was very familiar with this dream, this nightmare. That was because it was not just a dream, but a memory in dream form, which kept replaying in his head about once a week. He took a few deep breaths in an attempt to get his breathing back to normal. He had almost calmed down when a firm hand placed itself on his shoulder. Rory instinctively flinched and curled up into the fetal position to protect himself.
"Rory?" he heard a soft, soothing voice say, "Rory, it's me, Blaine."
Rory slowly uncurled and looked up at Blaine, his eyes still wet and full of fear.
"What are you doing in here? I woke up and you were gone and I got worried. I have been walking around looking for you for the past fifteen minutes." Blaine asked examining Rory's face.
"I couldn't sleep so I went for a walk, then I decided that this couch was more comfortable than the choir room floor."
"Yeah, I don't blame you." Blaine laughed and sat down on the opposite couch.
They sat in silence for a moment. Blaine looked like he needed to say something, but was worried about whether it was appropriate. He finally seemed to make his decision and addressed Rory.
"You seemed to be having a pretty bad dream. You were crying and rolling around."
Rory was immediately embarrassed. Why was it always Blaine that found him at his weakest? He quickly formulated a cover.
"Yeah, I was dreaming about…my family. I dreamt they got hurt." Rory falsely explained.
Blaine stared deep into his eyes, searching for the truth. Rory had never been a good liar.
"I hope you don't think I'm being too pushy or rude, but I think you're lying." Blaine said, continuing to stare at Rory, who looked away and started to fidget with some stitching on the sofa. "And why did you flinch so badly when I touched you."
Rory was silent for a while as he debated whether he should tell Blaine the truth. He didn't want to tell anybody about his past, but he knew that Blaine wouldn't fall for any lies he made up.
"My dream was actually a memory from a while ago. It has been haunting me for months now."
He paused and took a deep breath before revealing his secret.
"Its about when my parents found out the truth, about my sexuality. I'm bisexual." Rory admitted.
Blaine smiled and gave him an encouraging look.
"They caught me with another boy. And they certainly didn't approve." Rory finished.
Blaine sat for a moment to take in this new information.
"I'm really sorry your parents aren't supportive. I kind of understand how they feels, you know I'm gay right? My parents have never physically said they disapprove, but I can tell by the way they act that they aren't thrilled about it."
Blaine stood up and moved to sit next to Rory and put his arm around him in comfort.
"How come you didn't tell anybody here? I mean, you didn't have to tell the whole school, but you should tell the Glee Club. They are all very supportive of me and of Kurt. And you've seen the way that we supported Santana and Brittany recently. Both of Rachel's dads are gay. And you can trust us not to tell anybody else. We would never intentionally tell a secret like that if you weren't ready for it to be known."
Rory looked at Blaine with tears in his eyes.
"I know, I just don't like people knowing my secrets. They always end up getting spread around."
Blaine took Rory's face in his hands and carefully wiped his tears away.
"How did things end up with the boy?" Blaine asked inquisitively.
Rory sighed and replied, "Yeah, our relationship disintegrated after that."
"Wait a minute, this still doesn't explain why you flinched when I touched you. Is there something else that you're not telling me?"
Rory tried to hide his face so Blaine wouldn't see the look of humiliation on it.
"My father was fond of violent discipline. The night that I came out I received one of the worst beatings I had ever had."
Rory looked across at Blaine who was sitting there with a look that appeared to be a cross between shock and sympathy.
"That is one of the reasons I came here on exchange. I couldn't stand living with him any longer. I wanted to get as far away as I could."
"That is horrible. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Have you ever talked to anybody else about it? What about your mother? What does she do?" Blaine asked.
"My mother is too afraid to stand up for herself or go against my father. So my brother and I have to fend for ourselves. And no, I haven't told anybody else. There is no point; they wouldn't be able to help."
Blaine leaned towards Rory, embracing him in a hug. Rory felt the same feeling of security he had felt when Blaine had held him earlier. He didn't understand what it was about Blaine that made him feel so comfortable, but for the first time in his life he felt like he could trust somebody with all of his secrets that he worked so hard to keep.
Blaine pulled back and looked Rory on the eye, deep hazel to bright blue.
"I'm here for you. If you need to talk or vent some emotions, or have any other problems, I'm happy to help."
It was now 2am and the pair decided that they had better get back to bed or they would be too tired to practice tomorrow. So they returned to the choir room and went to their respective beds, both falling asleep within minutes.
A/N:
Thanks for the reviews, they are lovely and encouraging. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. As I was writing it I just wanted to giver poor Rory a hug. :(
Damian McGinty is quite possibly the most adorable man ever. :) I work at a music store and I had to re organise the CDs today. I spent a signifcant amount of time in the Celtic Thunder section just staring at his gorgous face. :)
