Grandpa Joe couldn't stand it. Not one bit. The other parents were absolutely revolting, always trying to one up each other. You have a woman who fattens her son up like a pig, a Man with way too much money spoiling her daughter rotten, a know-it-all father with not an inkling of original thought, and, probably worst of all, a mother who loves her daughter's trophies probably more than her daughter herself. It's a small miracle that the children didn't end up just like them. Not one of them said anything about loving their kid, or how fun the day was going to be.
Any time they tried to get Grandpa Joe to talk, it was usually to find something that they would consider humiliating so that they can laugh at him and his family. That is the main reason he kept to himself most of the stay, and is also why he was dreading the trip to the factory. Sharing a car with the parents would be hell on earth. He'd rather be with the children. In fact...
"Right. So here is how this is going to work." Mr. Salt said to the other parents as if training a bunch of new employees. "Andrew will be driving the children to the factory in the first limo."
Mr. Harrison gives a curt nod. "The children are in good hands."
"Yes. Well, as i was saying, following them will be us being driven by Perkins. The press will want to interview the children first, so let them. We get our free publicity shortly after."
Mr. Teevee raises an eyebrow. "It seems like you've done this before, Mr. Salt.
Mr. Salt smirks at Mr. Teevee. "How do you Yanks say it? 'This isn't my first Rodeo.' Now are there any questions?" Grandpa Joe raises his hand. "Good lord, Bucket! This isn't Primary School! What is it?"
"Well, I was wondering if i could ride with the kids instead?"
"Too good for us, are you Bucket?" Mrs. Beauregarde implied.
"You better not come un centemetre near mien little Augustus!" Mrs. Gloop scolded accusingly whilst the other parents snickered at Mrs. Gloop claim of Augustus being "Little."
"No, no Mrs. Gloop. I simply want to spend more time with Charlie." The four other parents stare at Grandpa Joe as if he just spat out Gobbledegook.
"Why on earth would you want that?" Mrs. Beauregarde asked. "You'll be spending an entire day with him."
"Well, Charlie and I are awfully close. And I barely saw him much seeing he's been with the other children these past few days."
"It's important for children to have their space from their parental figures," Mr. Teevee said in a chastising voice. "It builds their character."
Builds their- does he even listen to what comes out of his mouth? Grandpa Joe thought to himself as he worked hard to keep the disgust off his face.
"Now, now. No need to criticize Mr. Bucket." Mr. Salt said with fake kindness. "Of course he can spend time with his Grandson. There's plenty of room." Grandpa Joe smiled and walked to the other limo. Mr. Harrison opened the door to let Grandpa Joe in, and tipped his hat.
It was like night and day going from the obnoxious parents, to their... surprisingly normal kids. Grandpa Joe saw how the kids were from the beginning, and, aside from Veruca who was actually rather sweet from the start of the excursion, they were nothing like what they were in the beginning. Mike, who seemed like this desensitized violent know-it-all is now a rather open-minded yet still snarky teenager that is constantly referencing movies and TV. While Violet still had a bit of a competitive demeanor to her, it was more playful than it was on the telly. Augustus, while he still eats a lot, seems to be in much more control of what he eats than he let on when he first laid his eyes on him. He made the right choice, especially with Charlie becoming such quick friends with this lot.
"So what do you think he's like?" Veruca asked. "Willy Wonka, I mean."
"Probably like un mad scientist," Augustus said as he reached for a soda. "Like Einstein."
"I always pictured him as a more whimsical person," Charlie added. "Almost like a magician, but more... real."
"Magic ain't real, Chuck," Mike pointed out as he tossed a piece of popcorn in the air, catching it in his mouth.
"If you hated chocolate, and yet loved a Wonka Bar, that's magic right there." Veruca suggested.
"That's not magic. That's a recipe that just got everything right. Besides, all magic is is just an event that you don't know how to explain with the evidence given to you."
"So what?" asked Violet as she tossed two pieces of popcorn in the air, catching both of them. Mike raised an eyebrow. "Are you saying that people shouldn't believe in magic?"
"I never said that," Mike said pointing a finger at her. He then grabbed four pieces of popcorn and tried to outdo her. He caught all four with ease. The four spectators gazed at each other smirking out of confusion. "They just have to be ready for the man behind the curtain when he finally reveals his tricks."
Violet smirked, and grabbed eight pieces of popcorn. Mike snickered, thinking there was no way she could catch them all. Lo and behold, that's exactly what she did. Mike's jaw dropped. "A good magician never reveals his tricks, Mike."
"Very impressive, young lady," Grandpa Joe finally spoke up. Violet blushed a bit, something she had never done at the sound of praise. "You may not believe in magic now, Mike, but you will once you meet Willy Wonka."
"You talk as if you knew him," Mike prodded.
"Indeed. I knew him. I used to work for Willy Wonka." That got all of the children's attention. "Before he opened up that grand factory, he had a small candy shop on Cherry Street. We had these treats called chocolate birds, where if you put the egg in your mouth, a live chocolate bird would hatch before going still after, oh... five minutes or so."
"That's impossible," Mike said "You can't have multi-cell life without a brain, a circulatory system, a respiratory system-"
"But Willy Wonka did it. And how do you explain when the impossible happens?" Grandpa Joe made a POOF sound and waved his hands in front of Mike. "Magic." The four children laughed as Mike scowled.
"So Mr. Bucket," Veruca asked, "What was Willy Wonka like?"
The elderly man laughed to himself for a second. "He was a mad genius. Eccentric as they came. Quite the smooth talker, very witty. He has a reason for every single thing he does, and every single thing he says." His tone becomes more serious. "He is a man who must never be questioned. Even when it sounds trivial."
"How come grandpa?" Charlie asked, never hearing of this side of the famous Chocolatier before.
"Are any of you familiar with the tale of Prince Pondicherry?" All five children shake their head no, and Grandpa Joe clears his voice. "There was once a prince located in India by the name of Prince Pondicherry who hired Willy Wonka to build him a magnificent palace made entirely out of chocolate. Wonka asked to be paid in rare spices that the Prince had in his collection so he could discover new recipes. The prince accepted without hesitation. It had over 100 rooms, all made out of either dark or milk chocolate. The bricks, cement, ceilings, even the carpets were all pure chocolate. When it was finished, Wonka told the naive prince that he best start eating right away, but Prince Pondicherry had no intentions of ever eating his beloved palace. He intended to live in it. And so, he gave Wonka his spices, and sent him on his way."
"Vat happened next" Augustus asked.
"It was an especially hot day, and Prince Pondicherry took a nap on his throne. He woke to see his beloved Palace was melting. He attempted to make an escape but the doors had become giant mounds of melting chocolate. A few days later, the palace was nearly completely gone, with few structures surviving. One of said structures was a statue that crushed the Prince in his own throne room." The silence was palpable. "Willy Wonka warned the prince, but his own hubris was his demise. Willy Wonka is an expert on candy, especially his own, so the moral is this: if Willy Wonka tells you to do something or especially not to do something, you head his warning to the letter. Am I understood?" The five children nod silently. Grandpa Joe smiles. "Good! I think I'll take a quick snooze. Wake me up when we get there."
Violet waited 20 minutes before she spoke up again. "So what did Slugworth tell you all about the Everlasting Gobstopper?"
A/N: I had a good chunk of this chapter written half a year ago, but it was lost. I can't remember how similar this is to what i originally wrote, but i had this idea with Prince Pondicherry being, instead of a fun yet slightly tragic anecdote, a cautionary tale. This obviously required the prince to meet a more dire fate, but after watching that scene from the 05 movie, it seemed plausible that the prince could have died the way I have him die in this. My one regret is i'll probably not be able to use Grandpa Joe in the fizzy lifting drink scene anymore, but i have a solution. Anywho, please review, and I'll try not to take another year. So much time and so little to do- strike that. Reverse it.
