"Well, this looks quaint. And cold. Mostly cold." Wade stepped out of the truck into the mountain hill side looking at a snow camouflaged deer blind. "You better keep me warm at night."
"No, we will be sleeping in shifts." She walked past him and entered the blind that didn't have any kind of security.
With a heavy sigh, he followed after and was again shocked with what she could do with little. On one corner was a stack of more C4 that looked like her formula, three tv monitors with surveillance videos, a small fridge on the back wall and several wool blankets lined the walls and floor. It wasn't until he closed the door behind him he smiled. She had a small stock pile of six cases of bullets, five hunting knives, four hand guns, three high power rifles, two black katanas , and a partridge in a pear tree.
She opened the fridge and removed two bottles of water. She tossed one at him and sat down in front of the first monitor. She pulled out an electronic tablet and adjusted the setting on one of the televisions.
"Sweet, movie time. I vote for House of a Thousand Corpses. Rob Zombie has a magical way of displaying the ostricities of the suburban life in a way that would show the extradental fear that permeates from what can only be described as a redneck hillbilly."
She wasn't listening to him anymore. She began to watch the last four days of surveillance in impossible fast forward. The shift changes occurred every three hours with no one leaving what looked like a snow drift. However, in the right sunlight, you could see the muzzles of the guards weapons. A second camera watched the entrance of the building. It looked like a regular mining operation, except for the men who were wearing expensive shoes and were dressed for a day behind the desk and not in the soot. The third camera monitored their parking lot. She was able to see which vehicles the people drove making it easier to figure out where people went thanks to the University of Michigan's online-real time traffic cameras that were available to the public.
"Oh thank you Apple. All my games downloaded before we left that last Podunk town we were in. Alright. It's about to be on bubble blast. 'Cuz, you know, you're so much fun, Literal Laura." She watched the video without hearing him. And hour and a half went by with him humming to himself and carrying on full conversations with the voices. "Okay, now I'm board." He put his phone in a belt pocket and watched her monitor the TVs, stopping occasionally to make a note on the tablet. "So, what do you like to do?"
"Pardon?" She asked monotone, not looking at him.
"For fun. You know, that thing people sometimes do? Fun."
She paused watching the monitors. "Train, I suppose."
Deadpool threw his head back. "See, that's exactly what I'm talking about. So dull."
"I am a teenager, Deadpool, very little is legally available to me."
"Still, that car. You could be racing that in New York."
She made a note on the tablet. "Daken welded a governor to the engine block. I would have to remove, sauder, and rebuild the entire engine for me to race it." Deadpool had a look of dumb found. "Daken is a dick."
He sighed. "There's no other shangans you could get into?"
"No."
Deadpool sighed. "So…what was it like to be an X-Men?"
"It was made clear to me that I was never an X-man."
Deadpool rolled his eyes. "Fine. What was it like with them?"
Laura paused, seeming to find the right words. "Confusing"
Deadpool waited for her to continue. "Because."
"I found their policies to be hypocritical. Everyone is special and unique but you should strive for normal. An X-Men never kills, but you should be ready to do so when the moment arrives. If a pat on the back is not warranted, you have to give penance. An X-Man stands for the equality of all, but mutants come first. Be kind to your fellow mutant, but laugh at the mutants that do not have offensive powers. Utopia is a sovereign country, but there was no declaration, formal laws, nor a representative of it at the UN. All mutants are welcome, but Frost made it explicitly clear to me where I belonged. It reminded me of Animal Farm. I am sure when Xeavier started it, it had noble intentions. But when the pigs began to wear clothing, the whole purpose was perverted into Summers gain of power and his fear of losing it."
"Oh bo-ho, at least they accepted you."
She sighed. "If you call shunning, mocking, pitying, and cowering 'acceptance', then I suppose. The only time I felt peace was when I was on X Force, and even then, with Logan's paternal glare, it made it difficult to enjoy what I was doing."
"You were on X Force? Cool, so am I."
"Am?" She said to herself. She leaned back and reflected on the meaning of his simple sentence. Of course X Force is still in existence. Logan would never let it end because the war is never ending. She shook her head in shame. She was a fool for believing otherwise. She felt a twinge in her stomach and decided that that is what jealously must feel like.
"So I've noticed you haven't told me the plan yet. Any reason for that?"
She quickly went over the plan to him. Just before dawn, they would sneak up, take out the cameras near the snow drift. Take out the guards, and cut a hole in the defensive wall. Sneak in, plant C4 at all exits, load bearing walls, labs, and in the doctors who know too much of the formula. She would then take the flash drive that had an encrypted virus on it failing the computer systems in less than five minutes, tracing it back to where the information was to be retrieved. The computer virus would then set a trail for all the computers that had access to the facility's research, allowing her to put an end to weapon X once and for all. Then exit, get back to the safe house and go home.
"I like it. Lots of stuff that go boom."
She arched a brow. "I figured. I left out a lot of details because your insanity and 'surprise factor.' At four hundred hours, we will split…" she looked up at a monitor and stopped talking. A dark haired, dark skinned woman came out of the mine entrance and welcomed a guest that had severe scarring on his face. It was the man from Madridpore.
Deadpool leaned in close to the screen. "Holy fuck, is that Colcord? How is he still alive?"
"My question exactly."
She began to recalculate the plan. Her anger and need for vengeance rose like a bile in the back of her throat. But another part wanted to cower and run. She was here. Any move Laura made, she would anticipate. And when it came to Kimura, it was best to give her what she wanted.
"The plan has changed. Get in the truck. I will explain on the way."
XxXxXxXx
"That's your plan. Go in the front door?"
"It has worked well for me in the past. But you will require an entrance, which is why we are here." Laura turned the truck into a parking lot of a small shop in the middle of nowhere.
"And this is, what, a door depot?"
She turned off the engine and reached into the back seat of the truck. "A man who works for the facility comes here every Thursday while his wife is at her friends with friends drinking wine and ignoring the children."
"So…she's at book club?"
"Perhaps. We need to subdue the target with as little catteral damage as possible, and figure out his access code to allow you entrance into the laborites and computer programs."
Deadpool leaned forward to read the name of the establishment. Wild Foxes Gentlemen's Club. She handed him a bank roll of ones, fives, and twenties. He hugged her in a moment leaving her surprised at his actions. Her claws were extended and ready to strike. "BEST! PARTNER! EVER!" He screamed, setting off her already sensitive hearing.
"Please stop touching me."
He released her and took her money. "So the plan here is to put these girls through college?"
"No. I need you to distract the women, guards, and bartenders while I interrogate the target."
"By…"
"Being yourself."
"Full of tactium, suave, and an impressive impersonation of Berry White." He gave two thumbs up at himself.
She blinked in silence. "That is far more polite than what I would have said."
Deadpool shrugged. "Eh. Stick to angry and brutally honest. It's more your thing."
XxXxXxXx
Deadpool loves his job. After this little excursion, he decided to work for this little girl more often. He had women on either side of him, a bartender who made plenty sure his blood alcohol level was well above legal, and a bouncer who was making sure he wasn't roughing up the women that were surrounding him. Not bad looking women either. Who knew, especially for Montana.
Best. Job. Ever.
Business started to pick up in the small strip club a few minutes after they arrived. With the employees making sure their highest paying customer was happy and taken care of, they didn't pay much attention to the other customers who arrived. Even less to the legality of the dancers.
He noticed a female dancing but didn't connect the dots until she showed some upper body strength on the pole. Black and blue corset with matching panties and chastity belt. Black fishnet stockings and black pumps. Deadpool arched a brow. Her makeup was professionally done but she left her chocker on. He gently pushed a woman out of his view as he pulled out his phone to recorded Laura dancing on stage.
This has got to count as kiddy porn somewhere.
Homma homma homma
Bold!
What? I can totally use this as black mail later. For her or her dad. Sorry, 'originator.'
Her legs were wrapped around the pole as she hung upside down. She slowly spun on the pole while removing her corset one snap at a time.
Deadpool, this is wrong, look away.
"Can't. Hips so hypnotic. How did she even learn how to do that? "
Talk about shaking what yo mamma gave ya. Know what would totally embarrass her dude?
"Seeing this recorded on my phone?"
No, you paying her.
Okay, that does sound like fun. Go go go.
"Okay."
He left the confines of the women around him and went to the side of the stage with a shit eating grin and twenty folding in his fingers as the song ended. She smiled at a client then turned to walk off stage as she saw Deadpool, paying her. He could see the anger in her face. Blow cover by not accepting money or accepting the payment with a smile. With an internal growl, she took his hand, not his money, and used it as a handle for her to get off the stage. She pulled his head down to her and gave a quite snarl.
"Love it when you go feral."
"Get back to work." She left him to retire to the back room and reapplied the corset and makeup.
Deadpool kept an eye on her the rest of the evening. She made a good waitress. If she would smile more, it would seem normal. But she did to one client. She even gave him a lap dance.
"Gezus, I wish I was in the Weapon X program when she was."
Why do you say that?
"Because I'd love to be there when she was trained to do that." She actually looked like she was enjoying herself on his lap. Her motions were fluid and full of what can only be described as sexual repression. At least, that's what he wanted it to be.
You think we can buy one? For, ya know, informational purposes.
Such as…
A play by play on how Wolverines' daughter gave us a lap dance for 100 bucks. Fuck, I bet that will piss him off. Do it!
She whispered something in his ear but he shook his head. She shrugged and got off of him. He went back to watching the dancer on center stage for a few seconds. He looked franticly around himself but when he looked up, he saw Laura suggestively holding a leather wallet between her teeth. She moved past the back door to give him reason to follow. To which he did. Deadpool smiled. The ultimate predator.
XxXxXxXxXx
Deadpool was dancing to himself while standing next to Laura, who was waiting patiently for the target to awaken. "Don't trust a hoe. Never trust a hoe. Won't trust a…know wont trust me. She wants to touch me wahh she'll never leave me. Wahh. She wants to love me wahh, ah, oh ho. Dont trust a hoe. Never trust a hoe. Won't trust a…know wont trust me."
"Be quite."
"New favorite song by the way. X's on the back of your hands." Deadpool clapped twice. "Wash them in the bathroom to drink like the band."
"Shut up."
"No. And the set list, set list, you stole off the stage." Two claps "has red and purple lip stick all over the page. Ba-ba-ba- bruises, cover your arms."
"Did you get his identification yet?"
"yea, like ten minutes ago. Shaking in your fingers with the bottle in your palm. And the best is. Best is. No one knows who you are. Just another girl, alone at the bar."
"Remove that from your phone or I cannot be held responsible for what I will do to you."
"Aw what, you got beef? 'Cuz I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fuckin' sacred of you."
She released a growl. "He's awake."
"How much did he pay you anyway?"
"That is irrelevant."
He leaned in close to her ear. "Aww, was it less than 20?"
"It is irrelevant because it has nothing to do with the mission."
"I don't know. It could by tacos tonight."
"No."
"Oh come on, I'm hungry."
"No because I grow tired of tacos. Perhaps a pasta with scallop and garlic alfredo."
Deadpool squinted a questionable eye at her. "Thats so un American."
"I am Canadian and you will require the carbohydrates tonight. Mr Feltting. Are you conscious?" He gave a moaning response.
"Jeez, did you give him a roufy or something."
"He has, what I believe you call, a glass chin."
"Totally neglecting the fact that you have a metal skeleton?"
She paused in her reaction. "That may have been a factor."
"Ya think?"
Fletting rose his head enough to see Laura and a masked man behind her. "What's…what's going on?" He asked dazed. He tried to life his hand to his head only to realize he was tied up to a chair. His hands were behind him and his ankles were tied to the legs of the chair. "The fuck is going on, stripper?" He asked less groggy.
He heard the SNIK of her extending her claws as she stepped into the light. She showed her claws to him. "Do you know who I am?"
He swallowed loudly. But didn't say anything.
"I will take that as a yes. I am going to ask you one simple question. If I get board torturing you for the answer, I will allow my associate his turn. I assume you have heard of Deadpool?" Feltting eyes went from her to him in a state of panic. "He's far more imaginative than I am. So you would do best to answer my question."
"And if I refuse?"
Laura arched a brow. "You are a responsible man, Mr Feltting. You will do what is necessary for the well being of your family. Stephine did not make it to Margrets this evening. And your children Alexis and Amanda were rerouted from their friends home this evening as well."
"How did you-"
"Facebook, myspace, and twitter. Technology has only made it easier for monsters like me to track your blood line."
Feltting paused as he looked at her. She could smell his fear and reveled in it. "Prove it."
She picked up his phone and accessed an online web feed. Two screens showed him his wife and daughters held at knife and gun point by gloved hands. The women were all bound and gagged with tears in their eyes. They looked like they were screaming into the camera.
"Answer my question, and they will go unharmed."
He looked into his family's face's of horror. "But you'll still kill me."
"Of course. But your family will not need to die as well." He stared at the phones screen looking helplessly into his family's face. She turned the phone off and set it down near him. "What are your accesss codes into the facility mainframe."
He looked at her with malice. "Fuck you. You're nothing more than a monster. A weapon used to kill. I'd rather see my family fall than give you an advantage."
Laura nodded. "You are brave as well. In the face of death, you refuse. Fruitless, though it is. Deadpool, you may leave."
"Can I stay?" He asked excited.
"If you like." She returned her attentions back to the facility manager. "The codes." He spat at her feet. "Do not make this more difficult than it needs to be. Just give me the codes and I will make it quick and painless."
"Fuck you."
With a sigh, Laura grabbed a bottle cleaning solution that was on a nearby rack. With a single punch, she dislocated his jaw. He tried to scream out but she poured the cleaning solution down his throat, causing him to choke and cough. Laura extended one claw and held his dangling chin in her other hand. She forced his head back and used her claw to remove a molar. She reattached his jaw and let him cry in the pain.
"The codes." Three more times he refused and she forcibly removed six more teeth. She sighed. "Your wife or your daughters, My Feltting. Decide." She picked up his phone and entered a text message.
He spat some blood onto the floor. "Neither."
"If I kill your daughters, you will no longer have a reason to live. So I will order to have your wife beaten. Unless you want to give me the codes now." He looked at her with only anger in his eyes. "As you wish." She hit another button on the phone and turned it to him to watch his wife be beaten down. "Watch Mr Fletting. Just give me the codes and I can end this now." He shut his eyes and looked away. "Watch, Mr Fletting. This is what your stubbornness is causing. Your children are frightened, your wife is in pain. End this by giving me three simple codes."
"STOP IT." He tried to force his way out of the ropes by moving the chair a few inches.
"No, Mr Feltting. Three codes is all I require. Give them to me, and I will set your family free."
He looked up at her. This is what they trained her for. This is what she is meant to do. She does it well. HE looked down in shame. "Fine." She turned the phone and texted to stop the punishment.
"The codes." He spout off some numbers and letters to her. What he didn't count on was her checking them with the laptop he kept in his vehicle. "They verify." She turned his laptop off and sat it across the room. "Thank you for your cooperation, Mr Feltting. As your reward, you will die knowing your family is safe."
"Battered and bruised perhaps."
She shook her head. "No. They were never taken captive." He looked her with a swollen eye and split face. She erased the history on his phone and called Stephine, his wife. On loud speaker he could hear her.
"Hello."
"Stephine?"
"It is on mute, Mr Feltting." Laura stated.
"Hello, Steve?" His wife said again. She sighed. "I think you just butt called me….Hello."
"Why do people insist on doing that?" Laura asked as she hung up the phone. "They know you cannot hear them yet they continue to talk." She looked back at Steve. "Would you prefer I shoot you in the head or liver?"
He didn't say anything but looked at her with malice for lying to him about the whereabouts of his family. "If I shoot you in the head, it will be instantious but you will require a closed casket. A shot in the heart
"And you're to blame." Deadpool sang to himself. "You give love, a bad name."
Laura sighed. "It will show a professtial appearance. And seeing as how Deadpool is in here with us, the local police will not pursue. But, if I shoot you in the liver, you will die in twenty minutes in excoriating pain but someone will be arrested because of this. Not me, but someone. Choose." Laura loaded a gun and waited.
"Is this your idea of a joke?"
"No, it is my idea of kindness."
Feltting scoffed. "Surprise me."
Laura nodded and with three muscles, Laura pulled the trigger. The bullet hit him the brain and killed him instantly.
Deadpool sighed. "Well, that was anticlimactic."
Laura looked at the corpse she created. "It is how I prefer it."
"What did you show him on the phone?"
"I Photoshoped his families pictures that were listed on their facebook pages to look like they were taken captive and posted it on youtube."
Deadpool was silent. "Damn I gotta try that." She removed the magazine from the gun slowly and removed the round that was in the chamber. The sound of the club overran everything. No one heard a thing. "Why did you want to be kind to him?"
She put on a black tank top, her jeans, and zipped up the bag, hiding the gun the best she could. She turned and looked at Stevens body again. She only choose him because he was an easy target. And now he is dead because he dared to love. "It is something I know no one will give me."
She walked past him to leave the club as soon as possible. Deadpool rolled his eyes. "Emo's."
