"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much, Methinks"
By: Dozen and One Stars
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Disclaimer: I do not own Eyeshield 21.
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Suzuna sat on the sidelines and watched Deimon's own little soap opera unfold. Apparently Hiruma had done something in infer the wrath of the football manager so they were once again locked in a battle on bullets and broomsticks. She let out a happy sigh as the two continued swapping jibes without regard for the fact that they were making a scene. "It's so romantic..."
"What's romantic?" Monta asked as he munched on a banana.
"Those two are." Suzuna waved at the clearly infuriated two. "They're perfect for each other."
The catching star inhaled his banana at her words and started promptly choking. Kurita had seen Monta turning an unnatural shade of blue and had immediately started a panicked version of the Heimlich maneuver. The banana was successfully dislodged and he was once again was able so breath. Can you guess what his fist words were? "Are you out of you're mind!"
"No. What's eating you?" She looked up at him from her spot on the bench.
He pointed an accusing finger at her. "You! How can you even think that sweet Mamori would even consider... what kind of girl do you take her for? They're completely wrong for each other! It's maxi wrong!"
"Mamori and Hiruma?" Kurita looked at them nervously. "Do you really think they'd go out?"
Suzuna's glare changed to a reassuring smile. "They would. I wouldn't be surprised if they were already dating..."
"Who's dating?" The three turned around to find Musashi standing behind them with a water bottle in hand and a towel draped around his neck. He raised an eyebrow as he lifted the drink to his mouth. "What are you three talking about?"
"Those two!" Monta pointed a visibly shaky finger at the arguing football manager and quarter back. He then shifted it to roller skating teen that was sitting on the bench next to him with obvious distress in his voice. "She has this maxi crazy idea that those two make a cute couple! Tell her she's crazy! Tell her how wrong it is! Be the beacon of all that is just and right and tell her those two would never make it!"
The sixty yard magnum put down his water bottle and watched the two duel out whatever their fight was about with words and attempted physical injury. He reached out and patted the newly acquired team supporter on the head. "I hope you're right kid. She'd be good for him."
Monta's mouth dropped as Musashi walked away.
"Ha! How'd you liked that monkey boy?" Suzuna smiled triumphantly and pumped a fist into the air at his dumbfounded and slack jawed expression.
The catcher of the Devil bats dropped to his knees and pulled at his hair in obvious emotional anguish. Staring up into the blue sky he appeared to be pleading to whatever higher force he thought as listening. "Has the world gone mad? Just take a look at them! They do nothing but yell at each other! They're polar opposites! She's such a loving angel and he's a- a- it's just not right!"
"Stop being such a drama queen about it. If you knew anything at all about girls like Mamori then you would know that they love the bad boy type. And well-" She glanced back at the fighting couple and waved a hand in their general direction. "Look at him! He's the definition of bad boy! Of coarse she'd fall for him! Haven't you ever heard the saying 'opposites attract'? They compliment each other and that's why they go so well! Like peanut butter and jelly!"
At this point Monta couldn't take it anymore and promptly plugged his ears with his fingers. If he didn't hear her logic then it's not true, right? "Lies! All lies! I'm not listening to you anymore! You hear me? No more lies! I can't hear you!"
Sena picked this particular moment to walk into their little conversation. The poor running back was so confused. Mamori and Hiruma were in one of their little battles. Nothing-new there. Though Monta singing loudly with his ears plugged and Suzuna yelling something about being an idiot and how she was right was strange, quite the feat considering what he saw on a daily basis. "Uh, guys?"
Suzuna looked up at the sound of Sena's nervous voice. Seeing him she skated over and threw an arm around his shoulders. "Sena! I'm glad you're here!"
"You are?" His face became slightly red as he noticed her arm was draped over him. Together they walked to where Monta was still singing loudly to himself, he had yet to notice the arrival of his friend.
"Hey, what are you blushing for? Tell me, why are you turning red? Come on there's no need to feel embarrassed." She never could resist teasing him. It was just too fun. "Anyway as I said I'm glad your here. You see-"
Monta finally saw Sena and he quickly took his fingers out of his ears. "Sena! Talk some sense into this crazy woman! She won't listen to reason!"
"Shut up you banana brain! You're the one who can't handle the truth." Suzuna left Monta with steam practically shooting out of his ears. "So as I was saying Mamori and Hiruma make a great couple. Don't you agree?"
The running back stared at her like he thought he hadn't heard her right.
The raven-haired girl waved a hand in front of his face. Her facial expression displayed confusion and slight concern for her friend. "Sena? Did you hear me? I asked you what you thought of Mamori and Hiruma? Hello? Hey you okay?"
"Hiruma and Mamori?" He echoed. "But they hate each other... they're always yelling and fighting..."
"Thank you!" Monta's cheering could be heard in the background as he jumped for joy. "There you have it! He agrees with me!"
Suzuna sent a glare only an angered teenage girl could muster at the gleeful number eighty and snapped at him. "Oh shut up! It's called sexual tension you narrow-minded monkey! Just you wait! One minute they'll be arguing and the next they'll be kissing!"
"Argh!" The catcher's hands flew to cover his eyes as if something was wrong with them. "My eyes! They burn!"
"Oh grow up!" Suzuna sighed and shook her head. Her health teacher was right; girls do mature faster then boys. "Can't you be happy for them? After all love is a wonderful thing and they are lucky enough to have found each other! Don't you want her to be happy? What kind of man are you?"
And so the two continued their verbal spar until Hiruma noticed that they had stopped their work out with out his permission, which started another round of screaming and firearms. Mamori had a lot of holes to patch up in the players uniforms. Which leads us to a few hours later in the clubhouse where the said manager was diligently sewing away at various jerseys and pants.
The only ones in the room were the Deimon manager and self-appointed cheerleader. Everyone else had gone home with the exception on Hiruma, who had gone done to the store to pick up a few things for the team fridge. Opportunity was knocking and who was Suzuna to deny entrance. "So, what's with you and Hiruma?"
"What are you talking about?" Mamori stopped and looked up.
Suzuna nudged the auburn teen with her elbow. "You know what I'm talking about. Come on it's just us girls now you don't have to hide anything."
"I don't know what you're talking about." The poor girl had no idea what she was talking about. Looking back down she continued on with her thread and needle. After all those bullet holes weren't going to fix themselves.
"Oh please." She rolled her eyes in obvious sarcasm. "I know that you like Hiruma."
"What?!" Mamori's voice became more of a squeak than anything. The shock of the statement also caused her hand to slip and jab the pin into her finger. "Ow!"
The concerned roller skater watched as the other girl instinctively put her injured finger into her mouth. "You okay?"
"I'm fine." After taking her finger out of her mouth the football manager mumbled as she examined her finger. A small drop of blood indicated where she had stuck herself. "Just a slip of the needle. Now what did you say?"
The light bulb went back on in the cheerleader's head. "Oh right! So when are you going to tell Hiruma that you like him? I mean it's completely obvious that you two are perfect for each other and you can't rely on him to make the first move-"
"Whoa. Back up. I do not like Hiruma." Mamori protested. "We're friends if that. More like acquaintances really."
"Who are you trying to fool?" Suzuna demanded. "You can lie to those boneheads out there and you can trick yourself into believing that bogus story you've made up but you can't pull a wool over my eyes. I may not act like it all the time but I am a girl and as a girl I have that special gift of reading people's feelings. Face it you have a crush on him! I can't really blame you either. Once you get past the murderous attitude he's kind of cute."
"I hadn't noticed." Mamori had a slight red flush to her face. "Anyway I don't like him that way so you can just stop trying to drag it out of me."
The other girl let out a small smirk. "If you don't like him then why are you blushing?"
"I am not!" Mamori turned her head away so it wasn't visible to the younger Taki sibling.
The glee could not be kept out of her voice as she spoke. "Yes you are! Admit it!"
"No I don't! Why on earth would I have a crush on him of all people? He's rude, selfish, and loud! He curses constantly and has an unhealthy liking to violence and explosions! Who cares if he's cute? That fact of the matter is he has a bad temper and uncontrollable. What sane girl would go out with a guy who is obviously dangerous?" Mamori ranted as she continually stabbed the poor patch with her needle.
"So..." Suzuna said slyly. "You think he's cute?"
"Argh!" Poor Mamori was fighting a losing battle.
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A snippet from the next one shot chapter: The world had stopped turning. Hell had frozen over. Pigs could fly. Anything was possible and the end of the world was upon us. Everyone present could not believe their ears. Jaws were dropped and eyes were bugged out. One poor student had fainted. Another started on a prayer. Even Hiruma was shocked at the statement she had made. And he showed it.
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Thanks for all the reviews and to all the readers who continue to support me. Good tidings to you and whoever you may meet.
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