White
She paints furiously, blending, slashing and slicing with colour. Kara stares resignedly at her blue-red-yellow monstrosity – the same image that has haunted her since childhood. She gazes at it angrily for a moment longer, before grabbing the white paint and slapping it to the wall violently – white the colour of purity, covering her sin. Caught up in destroying her own creation, she does not notice – doesn't pay any mind – to the creeping male shadow slinking towards her from behind, stopping her hand from continuing its futile movements of desecration. She turns, so aroused that she really only expects one person – Le-oben?!
Like some cosmic pun, she is instead entangled with and embraced by Leoben – and is enjoying her tumble in white paint very much. White, the colour of purity, colours her madness.
Waking with a start, she feels guilty for dreaming of - and enjoying – a Cylon's company in the basest of ways. Her mind flutters to Lee for a heartbeat, thinking of how – yet again – his marriage is in dire straits. The poor fool. And yet, for once, she feels no jealousy towards Dee for possessing that which she cannot. No anger at Lee for refusing to cheat. Just loneliness.
On a backdrop of white, she is the conspicuous speck of grey that stands surrounded, and yet completely isolated.
Silver
The chain of her tags rubs gently against her sweaty neck. She lifts the charred tags in her hand before her eyes, confusion caressing Kara's features, darkened by anger and fear. Staring on with little attention, she turns the paradox hat is her own being over in her mind. Swaying peacefully, the tags sway as they are pushed by air currents, and Kara glares at them with disgust for complicating her already-complex life. For creating an even greater rift between herself and Lee. She hates Baltar for exposing her – all for the sake of his frakking religion no less. Footsteps rouse her from her thoughts, and Kara realises that she has been sitting motionless in one of the causeways for nearly an hour in an attempt to hide from the rest of Galactica. This new information about herself has only frakked up her relationship with Lee further. She's just so frustrated and perplexed – she wants him – wants a simplicity that allows them to become a 'them'. When Baltar ousted her secret, Kara could see the pain in Lee's eyes, could see that he thought she had picked that frak-weasel Baltar over him. Again.
Lee sits alone in his quarters, hair dripping quietly onto the floor, mulling over Baltar's recent revelation about Kara. He supposes that the knowledge should force them apart – further than the slim silver band she wears around her neck already has – but he can't help thinking about her with the same longing and desire as usual. Even if she is an 'angel', she is still his loveable frak-up. If he's honest with himself, Lee knows that there is no hope of any relationship between them, even if it weren't for the obtrusive silver barrier hanging from her ivory neck.
Blue
His azure eyes meet her evergreens across the bars she stands behind so expertly.
"What's the charge this time?" he asks, half amused, half exasperated at his friend's antics.
"Striking a superior asshole," she replies cheekily.
"And I bet you've been waiting all day to use that one," he replies, amused.
"Most of the afternoon, yeah," she boasts, her eyes twinkling mischievously.
Too soon, their talk becomes serious, and mentions of Zak's name sends Lee into darkness, his eyes becoming molten sapphire through anger. He leaves her sitting in the brig - storming out like a petulant child – leaving Kara with the blue imprint of his eyes in her mind, and scorning their very existence. Hating him for making her love him. Hating the guilt that he makes her feel with each longing stare – with each hungry gaze that roams that little bit lower each time it passes over his frame.
Swaying teasingly in her sky blue dress, Kara is the picture of utter sexiness and mischief – wrapped into one gorgeous bundle. And Lee can't keep his eyes off her – no matter how hard he tries. Smiling in the low light, his teeth glint just enough for Starbuck to find it charming. A lame comment about the state of her knee is passed, and Kara grins – full of flirtatious confidence, and stalking as many prey as possible. Although right now, a dance with Lee sounds…perfect.
Later that evening, as Kara sees the dress pool on the floor beside Baltar's hastily shucked off clothing, guilt rides through her in cool blue waves – how often had she wished that she could do this very deed with Lee? And instead, she is acting like the stupid frak-up she always is – and is about to sleep with the ship's most reputed playboy and current Vice-President – Gaius Frakkin' Baltar.
She knows that she'll regret this deeply come morning.
Green
The grassy plains stretch before him, and for all his talk of doing frak-all once humanity has found a home, Lee can't possibly imagine ignoring the exciting new prospects facing him. Squinting into the sunlight, his eyes follow the raptor's path for a few lingering seconds before finding Kara's evergreens almost boring into his soul. He talks to her properly for what feels like the first time in months, his face lighting up with a boyish grin that is almost child-like with eagerness. And then suddenly, she's gone. Of course, the invincible Starbuck who knew no rules and no bounds has been missing for quite some time, the fall maturing her slightly, her death leaving behind a broken woman in search of peace and fulfilment. He hopes for her sake that if she's finally gone this time, it's because she has found what she was looking for. Because she has found peace.
Still, he can't help but feel a twinge of sadness at the finality of her loss. This time – this time there's no turning back or sudden resurrections – he can feel it. In response to his question, the wind blows back, ruffling his hair – and deep within himself, he knows that although her body is gone, she is still with him. Always.
New Caprica was a bitch, a grey, dreary bitch of a time. But that shred of green – the one instance of light amongst the grey, with Lee on the green summer grass kept her going. Though she 'loved' Sam, she would always have a soft spot – a secret yearning – for Lee Adama, no matter how stupid it was.
Leaving him on the grassy plains by himself had been both the hardest and easiest decision of her life. She would always love him, and though she wanted immediate reciprocation, she knows that the only way to succeed is to wait for him to return to her. Thus, she departed, peaceful at last.
I'm sorry it's been so long! Thank you for reading this chapter, and if you enjoyed it, please review! Thanks to Tel Nokshock and Guest for reviewing last chapter - and thank you for waiting so patiently for this chapter! I hope you liked it :) (I had to make a few minor fixes, so the chapter will appear as a "repost" - sorry!)
