Chapter 3: It's all Fine
A/N: Sorry for the very long delay. I got distracted from this by other things and I just wasn't sure what to write next. Also, if you think John is OOC- it's because he is, this is just my take on what John is secretly thinking all the time.
Therapy Session Chapter 3:
It's All Fine
John frowned as their meal was interrupted by his phone, it was a reminder that he had promised to see Ella again today since he hadn't stayed the full session yesterday.
Sherlock still hadn't answered John's question about what in all he wanted from his blogger. "What time do you see her?"
Of course the worlds only consulting detective new what his phone said already. "I have about an hour and a half."
"Mhm."
John chuckled lightly to himself as he remembered what Ella had told him about Sherlock. "It could be an interesting session."
"Can I come?"
John blinked in surprise. "Come? To my therapy session? Uh- I'm not sure that would be a good idea."
"Please?" John gulped, there was that 'please' again. "People are always telling me I should see a therapist after all." He smiled sarcastically.
"She might not allow it, but alright, you can come. Just don't be disappointed if you're told to sit in the waiting room."
Sherlock was satisfied by this.
As soon as the two boarded the cab Sherlock sat closer to John then they were normally accustomed to. Is this ok? He hasn't told me to back off yet. Sherlock analyzed John's facial reaction to his experiment.
John wasn't at ease, he didn't actually want Sherlock coming with him, especially after everything Ella said, but then she had been completely wrong hadn't she? What happened last night changed everything, right? He was very unsure of himself and had yet to realize the overly close proximity of Sherlock in the cab, his question for the genius over dinner still sat awkwardly unanswered.
"So, this?" John made a hand motion Sherlock didn't quite comprehend.
"The cab?" He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion, did John want him to pay for the cab fair? Was that to be expected of him now? Or was John asking if he was suppose to pay?
"No, no" John sighed. How on earth is this man supposedly a genius? "Us. Er- what would you like?"
"Oh." Sherlock contemplated this not sure what he could ask for before John was uncomfortable.
"You don't need to think too hard about, just say what's on your mind, anything, it's all fine."
"I want you to tell me about what you've been feeling since the war."
This was a very unexpected blow. "Uh, not really what I meant."
"Why do you pretend to care about things? Why do you pretend to get mad at me?"
"I don't pretend!" he said a bit too loud but Sherlock and his usual social awkwardness didn't catch it. "I do get upset with you sometimes, it's just that I forgive you."
Sherlock narrowed his eyes. "Cabbie- you flunked out of high school, your wife thinks your not good enough for her and your kids despise you."
"Well fuck you too mate!" The cabbie hot back considering if he wanted to kick them out or not but ultimately decided he needed the cab fair more then his pride.
"Sherlock! What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?!"
Sherlock clutched John's face with his hands and stared intently into his eyes.
"What are you-?" John's voice trailed off.
"Faking."
"What?" damn him, he would do an experiment on me like that.
"Faking. You're not mad. You don't care about the cabbie in the least, nor that I would insult a stranger like that, you are in fact very accustomed to me insulting strangers and don't mind when I do it. But you almost always pretend to be cross with me, on rare occasions you don't care enough to even pretend to be though."
John crossed his arms uncomfortably.
"You have been seeing your therapist for over a year now and your lack of emotions is worsening yet you haven't told her about it."
"Sherlock." He tried to warn him not go down this road.
Both men sat quietly for a bit.
"You're not a sociopath John." The words sat awkwardly in the air for a moment.
"I never said I was."
"No, in fact you have been hiding it. You didn't even think you might be a sociopath until you heard me say that I am. It gave you a possible answer for what you previously couldn't name." He paused. "But you aren't one."
John shifted in his seat. "Why do you say that?"
"You're conflicted about the way you feel. You see how 'normal' people act and react around you and you think you should be like them. Act like them. Pretend you're boring and mundane like them, but you're not. You don't care about things that other people care about because you realize how very unimportant it all is after the war. But everyone seems so sure that they think they know what's important, and you might have been that way too before, but you're not now and you don't understand it. Because you don't care about these silly unimportant things you second guess your real emotions. You think all your feelings are fake, but they aren't."
"How do you know they aren't?"
"Because I'm Sherlock Holmes and the best detective that has ever lived. Are you really going to question my authority on deductions?" Both men looked at each other stone faced until they both burst into laughter.
"Because I'm Sherlock bloody Holmes!" John mimicked. "And I have the biggest ego of all of mankind!"
Sherlock continued chuckling, "Well I am right after all."
"Well you've been faking too."
Sherlock's laughter died out, "What do you mean?"
"You're not the sociopath you claim to be."
"I'm just high functioning-"
"No." John put his hand on the side of Sherlock's face the detective to look at him. "You have emotions Sherlock, I've seen them. You care about Lestrade, even Mycroft although you wont admit it. Mrs. Hudson is like a mother to you! I see the way you look at her and how you give her special treatment, the way you seek her acceptance despite driving her mad."
"I do not-" Sherlock stopped when he saw the look in John's eyes. "Not just them."
John smiled slightly, knowing what he might say next he took Sherlock's hand in his.
"There's a funny little army doctor I've been having very strong feelings for too you know."
"Well, I'm sure if you would admit these feelings for him he would reciprocate in some way."
Sherlock leaned in closer to John and was met by a pair of surprisingly soft lips for someone who spends half his time licking them.
"Ella?" John leaned through the door before entering, "I brought someone with me today, is that alright?"
Ella was surprised, John was so closed off about his private life that she couldn't possibly imagine him wanting to bring someone in with him. "Of course." She sat up straighter and straightened some files on the end table next to her seat.
John nervously sat on the small couch across from Ella followed by an uncharacteristically quiet Sherlock.
Ella's expression suddenly changed "Oh no, is this Sherlock Holmes? You're different without the hat."
Sherlock cringed at the mention of the ungodly head wear he so despised.
"You didn't make John bring you here did you?"
"No Ella, I wanted him to come. He just wants to- understand what's been going on with me is all." He said truthfully.
"Now John, I really think you need to think more about your future and settling down like we discussed last time."
"I have and I did."
"You what? What do you mean you 'did'?"
John's eyes flashed towards Sherlock again. "Settle down."
"Living in a bachelor pad running around solving crimes is not settling down, by any means."
"I've decided that's all I want out of life, more or less. That's what I plan to do from now on."
"But John, you wanted to meet someone and-"
"I have."
"You have? Since yesterday?" Her brow furrowed.
"Over a year ago and our life has been near perfect and I wouldn't want it any other way, well, a few changes since we met of course."
Ella watched in disbelief 'he couldn't possibly mean… '
Sherlock took John's hand causing John to grin giddily, "You see, I have all I need already, I was just to slow to see it before."
The following day Sherlock and John showed up at a crime scene happier then anyone had ever seen them.
"Good, you're here. I need you to figure out what went down here." Lestrade gestured to a dead body sitting behind the wheel of a car.
Sherlock grinned, it was a very complicated murder and he would be able to show off to John. "Oh how dull, really Lestrade, Anderson should be able to solve this one for you!"
John chuckled as Sherlock walked off to get a better look, "Show off. He only says things like that when he's trying to impress me." He smiled fondly.
"Well he would." Lestrade sighed. "How on earth do you get on with him?"
"Simple. I love him."
Lestrade froze in place. No, no, you obviously misheard him… or misunderstood him… or something. This is John 'not gay' Watson here.
Sherlock marched back over and grabbed John by the arm "John, you aren't even listening to me deduce what happened! I need you by me."
"Sherlock, I'm trying to talk to Greg."
"Well stop." He cut off John's response by pressing his mouth against his in a deep kiss. Sherlock would get everything he ever wanted from John and John would love it.
An on looking Lestrade nearly fainted in disbelief.
A/N: Thank you for reading :) I hope you enjoyed this piece. I think I will be making more shorts like this in the future, I find them very rewarding.
Oh, and Lestrade is happy for them, he's just in shock ^^
