Disclaimer: Not mine. JKR updates regularly, I'm quite sure of it.

A/N: I'm sorry! This is a Christmas fic, I'm not done, and it's February. In my defense, my beta was having some difficulties getting it back to me on time. Sorry to rat you out, Sid. I still love you! She's quite wonderful, though, so I keep her around. :] Enjoy.

Molly Weasley finished up her cooking (most of which involved cleaning up Ginny's mess), and could honestly say she was quite pleased with herself. When Narcissa stumbled into the kitchen, Molly said a polite hello, only to be pushed aside so the blonde woman could snatch some cooking sherry. "Bad day?" Molly asked. Three years prior, it would have been thoroughly inappropriate to ask such a thing to the Lady Malfoy, but after the wedding- and especially after Lux came into their lives- the two women had become something akin to friends.

Narcissa said something along the lines of, "Lucius took my bloody drink away," but the statement was a little slurred and it was difficult for Molly to understand.

"Ah, I see," the plump woman replied. "Well, everyone should be sitting down for dinner at the moment anyway, why don't you go into the other room?" And with that she shooed Narcissa out of her kitchen, who merely "harrumphed" in response.

Again, there was a knock on the door. Molly didn't even bother answering it; she had the finishing touches on her nearly perfect meal to attend to, and the house was already full with most of the Weasley clan, the last remaining Potter, a Granger, and the entirety of the Malfoy family - its two newest members included - any of whom could answer the door (except perhaps the eldest Malfoy couple, because, honestly, why would one be delusional enough to think that they would?).

After hearing a very girlish squeal, followed by a higher-pitched one, Molly knew that Charlie had finally arrived. He was Ginny's favorite brother, (although she'd never admit it to the others), and Lux's favorite uncle. He'd been doting on Ginny ever since he found her sobbing after having been left out of a game the other boys were playing, and had spent much of his time doting on Lux ever since her birth.

Molly looked into the hallway for a confirmation. She spotted Ginny, Lux on her hip, apparently throttling Charlie with a very tight one-armed hug. Hermione ran into the hallway immediately, and gave Charlie an unnaturally quiet and polite "hullo," particularly for one who had just bolted into the room to greet him. He returned the greeting with a wide smile, and Hermione's cheeks turned a slight shade of pink as Lux dragged him off in attempts to show him her newest doll. Molly couldn't help but smile to herself; she gave her son and Hermione another year, two at the very outside, until they were married. A mother always knew.

Molly beckoned her sons over to her and informed them of their yearly Christmas duties: rounding up all of the people in the house and setting the table. Their meal would be served shortly, as everyone seemed to be at The Burrow- but as of late, who really could be sure if they were missing someone? The family grew more every day, it seemed. Ah, there it was- another knock on the door. Mrs. Weasley searched the table for any missing faces, but everyone seemed to be present. She even counted the tiny heads at the small, round, children's table, but not a soul was missing from the gathering.

She walked purposefully to the door, put on her warmest hostess smile, and opened it, its hinges creaking ominously. Her jaw dropped. "Well, I never…" she breathed.

"Good evening Molly," Severus Snape greeted the Weasley matron, giving her a curt nod, and glided past the woman as she continued to stare into the open doorway, seemingly in a trance due to her unbridled shock.

Draco stood and shook the hand of his former Potions professor as he entered the room, motioning for him to take the seat to his right. The majority of the people sitting at the table had a similar reaction to Molly Weasley's previous one (who still had yet to leave the doorway). Arthur was a first to clear his throat and say a proper greeting, followed by Lucius nodding in Snape's direction and asking after his wellbeing. Narcissa clapped happily, and nearly leaped towards Snape, enveloping him in a hug. The Slytherin Head of House flushed (that is, he became slightly less pale), shrugged her off gently, and took a seat next to his godson.

Lucius excused himself from the table after seeing the embarrassing display from his wife. Merlin's beard, how he hated this blasted holiday. Neither he, nor the other occupants of the home, had noticed two particular peoples missing from the gathering.

"Really? This was your back up army?" Ginny snickered in her husband's ear.

"Sod off, Ginevra. Your darling brothers charmed what can only be described as a red sleeping cap onto my bloody head. It seemed to be a good idea at the time."

"Oh, get off it," she replied, sighing. The couple rarely fought; merely bickered. But she had an ominous feeling about her relationship's solidity by the night's closing.

"Should've let me drink," he murmured in a sing-song tone into her ear.

She shrugged in response, smirking a bit. They would be just fine. She said a polite "hullo" to the man whom she lovingly referred to as the Great Greasy Slime-Bat, because it was Christmas, after all. She could consider her almost friendliness charity work for the holiday.

There were shouts coming from the second floor hallway. Everyone at the table stopped to stare at the stairwell. Down staggered a very shocked Lucius Malfoy, a black thong hanging from his ponytail, followed by a mortified Hermione, burying her face in her hands, and Charlie Weasley, apologizing profusely, but, in all honestly, looking quite pleased with himself. Now, to any innocent bystander, this could have looked very, very wrong indeed. Granted, it was not exactly right, per say, but certainly not nearly as naughty as one's probable assumptions.

"Hermione! With Malfoy! You didn't!" Ron cried, looking horrified at his friend's out of character poor decision making.

"Oh, enough Ronald! I was not with Lucius!" Hermione announced shrilly.

"Please call me Mr. Malfoy," the older man groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. Dinner had yet to start, and he already had a migraine.

"With all due respect, sir, you have my undergarment on your head. I think I have the right to call you whatever I damn well please," Hermione snapped. Lucius, remembering the lacy thing he'd been hoping would disappear on its own, fell silent, slumped into the seat, and handed Hermione back her… article. She continued, "I was not with Mr. Malfoy. He merely walked into the wrong place, at the worst time."

"Oh? Then who were you wi- oh." Ron fell silent and looked between his brother and his best friend, bewildered.

Molly used all of her good sense not to dance around, shouting "told you so!"- but she couldn't help but let a chuckle escape. When Hermione shot her a glare usually saved for special occasions (like when Ron or Harry did something particularly stupid) the redhead merely shrugged sheepishly, still grinning like a jack-o-lantern.

"Well, I don't think I like it!" Ron shouted, not knowing why he was doing so. He wasn't particularly angry with either party, but the surprise of the situation, and the way he found out, made him thoroughly irritated. Very, very irritated indeed. Bloody furious, even. "You can't just go around… doing… dirty… things in your friends' bathrooms!"

"Enough, Ronald! I will not have a scene at my Christmas dinner! Sit with the children!" Molly snapped. She would not have her youngest son's irrational agitation ruin her chance at more grandchildren.

"But Mum- " he protested.

"Sit. With. The. Children," Molly ordered, pointing at the small table."

"You too!" Narcissa said, seemingly at random, turning to Lucius.

"Excuse me?" he asked, raising an elegant eyebrow.

"You had the Mudblood's" - the table members gasped at her vulgarity- "thong in your hair. Sit." She instructed forcefully, pointing at the round table for the second time, where five little heads looked up in fear (six, including Ron's large one) in fear at the arrival of the very tall blond gentleman. He glared at the wine goblet in his hand; he really hated this bloody holiday. He would certainly lock up the liquor next year.

"Maybe if you'd just cut your hair Lucius, we wouldn't have the problem," Molly said cheekily. She was giddy with the idea of more grandchildren; nothing would break her spirit.

Deciding it was about time for some order, Mr. Weasley cleared his throat to attempt silence amongst what could only be described as the crowd. He cleared his throat louder, causing a few of his family members to finally shut the bloody hell up accompanied by the Malfoys and Snape who hadn't really attempted to talk in the first place (excluding Ginny and Lux, of course – come to think of it, Narcissa as well, who insisted on attempting to strike up conversation with Percy). "WELL," he finally shouted. This actually caught their attention and the noise went down from a dull roar to near-silence. He continued: "Well, I was just hoping to thank everyone for attending, even our… surprise guests," she looked pointedly at Snape, "With the whole family together, those extended and those immediate, I think this may become the best Christmas the Weasley household has had to date, despite the occasional… disturbance." He looked pointedly at Hermione, who blushed furiously, and Charlie, who pretended not to hear him. Mr. Weasley then grinned happily and clapped his hands together to imply that everyone could begin eating.

Poor dear, kind Mr. Weasley, despite his many years and fatherly wisdom, he had never said something so wrong and naïve as that final statement before the meal officially commenced.