Disclaimer: ST: VOY is not mine.
Author's Note: My response to Singing Violin's challenge. Last part?
Failure to Fight Fate
By mistress amethyst une
Chapter 3
"Go to sleep," she pleaded with him.
She'd weakened further since her last outburst. Now bedridden, Kathryn had a much harder time convincing her husband to rest. He insisted on watching her nod off and was always at her side. She had no idea as to whether or not he slept anymore. Before she drifted off, he would be there, eyes wide open yet weary, looking at her with so much sorrow and apparently wondering whether her nap would take her into a dream from which she would never wake. When she opened her eyes, he'd greet her with a smile that expressed nothing but utmost relief despite how tired he was. In both instances, he would be more haggard then the last time she had looked upon him. He refused all her invitations to rest.
"I'll sleep when you doze off," he insisted.
She was unconvinced, "You're not fooling me. You haven't slept a wink since I've been confined to this bed."
"I've taken a few short naps."
"Chakotay, it's been five days and you aren't exactly in top shape. 'A few short naps' isn't going to cut it."
"I'll manage."
She shook her head and sighed, "Lie down with me."
She drew back the covers and noted that he was about to argue. Arching an eyebrow she put on her best command voice, "Do I have to make that an order, Commander?"
For the first time in days, he laughed slightly and recalled their days on Voyager, "Aye, Captain. It is Captain, right?"
"Of course," she smiled as he crawled into bed with her and wrapped his arms around her waist, "No matter what Starfleet calls us, you'll always be my first officer. My helping hand through everything..."
They lay face to face as he gripped her tighter to him, "And you'll always be my Captain... To whom I pledge my undying loyalty."
He kissed her forehead and, together, they closed their eyes and drifted off into the tempestuous waters of sleep knowing very well that they were treading the fine line between life and death. Both weak, they clung to each other as they slumbered. Her hand rested on his side and he maintained a tight grip on her body, seemingly aware that entering the land of dreams was one path to disappearing forever. Both so unwilling to let go...
Death refused to be thwarted and finally pulled them apart. After months of struggling against oblivion, one of their bodies was more then eager to surrender its soul to eternal rest. A hand gently slid from where it had once firmly held their embrace. One of them slackened within that final loving gesture and was gone as the other lay unaware in the arms of one who had been claimed by the inevitable. Slowly, the other body grew cold and stiffened. The one who slept would awaken to the nightmare of being held by a lifeless shell that had bristled with life just hours ago. Chakotay had perished clinging to the woman he loved most. In wanting to make every remaining moment of her life count, he'd cut his own existence short.
Kathryn opened her eyes. Still face to face with Chakotay she smiled before realizing how cold he was. Shivering, she put her palm to his chest to feel the rhythm of his heart and the rise and fall of his breaths. The silent stillness made her gasp.
"No..."
She quickly extricated herself from his embrace. She screamed and balled her hands into fists desperately pounding on him, trying to wake him up...
As she wept, her grief robbed her of all sense, "How can you leave me like this? You can't do this to me!"
Just hours ago, he was alive and had even laughed and kissed her. This just wasn't right.
She continued raging at him, desperately pushing at his body and pounding on his chest, "I wasn't supposed to see you die!"
She attempted CPR but found that she couldn't get his mouth to open. Rigor mortis had already begun to set in...
"Didn't you tell me we needed every moment because I could go any day?" she said as she pushed on his chest and blew air upon cold lips that refused to give her entrance, "You can't leave me to die alone...Y-you promised!"
That day when she'd been told that she would no longer be able to leave her bed without harming her frail body, he'd sat at her bedside and taken her hands in his.
"Chakotay, what's going to happen to me now?"
The look in his eyes mirrored the pain she was feeling.
"Whatever happens, you won't face it alone. I'll be here," he'd said with a slight tremble in his tone, "I won't let anything happen to you..."
"You won't let me die alone, right?"
"Kathryn, you're not going to die..."
She wasn't about to hear it. She had accepted her fate a long time ago,"Chakotay, promise me. Promise me I won't die alone. Promise me you'll be with me until the end. To hold my hand before I slip away..."
He shook his head, "Kathryn, can we not-"
"Promise me!"
He finally nodded even as tears filled his eyes in accepting that he really might have to watch her die, "I promise..."
"You liar! You promised me..."
The tears refused to stop flowing as the very life seemed to leak out of her with the intensity of her grief, "You can't leave me like this..."
She looked up to the ceiling as if hoping to see Death itself hovering with her husband's soul in its grasp, "Give him back… He wasn't even sick. He just needed a little rest. That was it. Give him back. I'm the one you're supposed to take!"
Not knowing what else to do, she bawled openly and rolled off the bed only to crash to the floor. Her legs were too weak to carry her. Pounding on the carpeted surface, she threw a tantrum that would rival any child's. Using the little strength she had left, she dragged herself out the bedroom. She was thankful for the open door and stopped as the top stair of the winding staircase greeted her.
A few years ago, Chakotay had fallen down these very same stairs. That fall was under much happier circumstances and she even recalled how he had laughed as she tended to his injuries.
"Honestly, Kathryn, I didn't expect such a grand gesture for our anniversary."
She smiled as she ran a regenerator over his sprained ankle, "How could I have known you would have slipped on the trail?"
She kissed him gently, "I thought a trail of rose petals was the perfect romantic cliché."
"You must have used up an entire florist's shop's supply covering those stairs. Who knew rose petals could be so slippery?"
She chuckled, "You exaggerate. If anything, you were just clumsy. And I hardly sprinkled any on the stairs, dear. Compared to what I have waiting for us in the bathtub, I'd say I only wasted an even dozen on that trail you so carelessly stumbled on."
He practically beamed, "Can't wait to get back on my feet then…"
She laughed, "You ankle's all done. I'll be waiting upstairs. Try not to trip this time…"
Tears streamed down her face as she prepared to fling herself down that same flight of stairs. Desperately crawling to the edge of the first step to prepare her weak body for a fatal tumble, she heard the sound of their front door being flung open. A visitor, perhaps…
"Someone to find us," she thought as she inched closer to her death.
And then there was darkness…
OOO
Author's Note: Leaving it ambiguous as to whether she managed to fling herself down the stairs or not. I could end it right here but that wouldn't be very nice of me, would it?
