Chapter
3
Half-Wits
Two days after the incident that they named the 'Brom incident', The Other Guy was walking down the street to see Angela, when a person that had blond hair and blue eyes, much duller than The Other Guy's own, came up to him and said, "Don't tell him I was here, and don't give him my name." in a rushed manner.
The Other Guy asked him, "Who's chasing you? And what's your name?"
"Phil, and there is a Half-blind, Half-wit chasing me." And after that sentence he ran off to the right. A little bit after that the possible Half-blind, Half-wit came up to him and asked him where Phil went.
The Other Guy answered, "He went that way." Pointing backwards. The Half-blind, Half-wit thanked him and waddled off in that direction.
Later that day, He went to Jeod's house asking for Neal, who is Brom, but he still used the name He was given, and Evan, the butler answered, "Yes sir, I think he is in the study. Why, is he excepting you?"
"Just tell him He is waiting outside, please."
"Yes sir." And he disappeared into the house with a look of skepticism.
When he returned he told He to follow him, and he led him to the study. When upon arriving at the study, He was surprised to see Neal teaching Evan how to read. Neal asked him, "What do you want, He?" looking slightly annoyed at him interrupting their studies.
He's eyes lit up as he thought up a great line to say, "Oh, Evan don't forget to," in a deep evil voice he said, "RESSURRECT THE DEAD." In his normal voice he said, "What are you learning, Evan?"
Evan answered, "How to read."
"Hmm… I didn't know you couldn't read."
"My dad said that reading wasn't important, but uncle thinks that it is important."
"Well I didn't mean to interrupt, I just wanted to see how you were doing."
"We're doing fine thank you," Neal growled out before Evan could say anything.
"Well I will take my leave and let you return to your studies. Farewell."
"Bye." Evan said as He left. Seeing the look on Brom's face he asked, "What?"
"They're a bad influence on you."
"Ba- bad influence? Brom, you've said a joke and- and a pun!"
"You're falling short of my expectations, again."
"Brom, saying the same pun/joke again doesn't make it any punnier."
"You're still falling short of my expectations again. Now, back to learning." Brom said forcefully, implying that the conversation was over.
The next day The Other Guy was walking to go to Angela's store when he had a sudden Déjà vu, when Phil ran up to him and said, "Don't tell him my name and don't tell him I was here."
The Other Guy answered simply, "Okay." And Phil ran behind him this time, and then the Half-blind, Half-wit showed up like yesterday and spoke to him with a slur, "You lied to me yesterday, he went to the right and you said that he went behind you."
The Other Guy said, "I'm sorry 'bout that, but now this time he actually went to the right."
The Half-blind, Half-wit thanked him again and waddled off to the right. The Other Guy continued on his way to Angela's shop with a question on his tongue. When he reached her shop, Angela said, "So you've met Phil and the Half-blind, Half-wit."
"Yes," he answered completely ignoring the way she knew about that, and said, "Do you know what happened that made the Half-blind, Half-wit start chasing Phil?"
"Oooh! That's a good story!" she exclaimed
"Will you inform me of the story, then?" he said knowing the way of how she talked
"Sure! It was just a few… actually I can't remember when, but who cares! Phil cussed while trying to get his peanuts back from an annoying kid, when the Half-blind, Half-wit asked Nigel what his name was and I he answered that it was Phil, when he knew what his actual name was, and no I'm not going to say what his real name is, but you know who you are if you're reading this."
"Wait, you know this is a book?"
"I know a great many things. And that this is actually an unexplained part in one book which the author of this book, which the Readers are reading now, took advantage of."
"Hmm, somehow I knew that you knew that."
"Never underestimate me, those who do end up dead."
"I will never understand and underestimate you, Angela. Also, how do you like breaking the Fourth wall?"
"Oh, I love it since I can't break it in the other book."
"It's Quite fun ain't it?"
"Yes." She said quite calmly despite her excited look.
"Well it seems you will go shopping and I will not hinder you, so farewell."
"Bye! And don't forget that toads are frogs and will only be frogs!" she yelled after him.
"I won't forget!" he yelled back.
The incident with Phil and the Half-wit happened every day until they began to leave and even then it happened and here's how it went,
They were walking to the gate when Phil came running out of one of the streets and said, like every other time that it happened, "Don't tell him I was here, don't tell him my name." and ran off into an alleyway. Then came along the Half-blind, Half-wit.
He looked at The Other Guy accusingly and said with the ever-prominent slur, "Why do you keep lying to me? And which way did he go?"
"I keep telling you I'm not lying, and this time he ran out of the city the direction that the road goes."
And the Half-blind, Half-wit thanks him and waddles off in the direction of two travelers on the road.
He asks The Other Guy, "Did you know who those travelers on the road are?"
"Nope, do not know at all do you?"
"No, but they left about an hour before us." He said as they were walking down the road.
Weird characterness. and a bit of random OC, too.
1,025 words.
