Disclaimer: See last chapter.

Warning: Drugs, and implied sexual activities and M rated words.

~ Chapter Three ~

Rachel laughed loudly as she stood outside the school with Summer and her friends. She was becoming part of their group now, and it had been two whole weeks since the whole thing had started and if she was honest, she was enjoying herself more than she ever had before.

She puffed on the cigarette in her hand and then rolled her eyes when Kurt and Tina started to approach them. She hated to admit it but she missed all of them so much, but of course she would never let anyone else know that – not even them. They were her best friends and she had just ditched them, she felt bad but she knew they were all better off without her holding them back. It was better like this, better for everyone. She would just ruin everything for them – she was like that, or so she thought, she ruined everything she touched. She hated herself for getting close to them, she never deserved their friendship.

"You missed Spanish today, I took down some notes for you." Kurt held out a small, pink notebook, pleading with the girl to just take it. She just looked unsure and stared at Summer for a moment but she just laughed and turned away from the three girls. Rachel took one more look at her and then back at Kurt and Tina,

"Whatever, screw Spanish and screw you, freaks." She made sure her words were filled with so much venom, as much as she could find just so they would leave her alone. She was trouble, it's all she was. She was turning into the type of person that her dads warned her against, she just wanted the two to be safe – and sometimes, the only way to make sure they were okay, was to make them give up on her. She didn't feel like bringing them down with her, it wasn't fair on them.

She sighs as their faces drop, walking away quietly, " Yeah, walk away losers!" Summer shouted behind them, smirking.

"Don't rub it in." Rachel muttered, watching Summer light another cigarette. She had stood there and watched as the two walked away, she had everything before and now she had nothing. She had the one thing she had always wanted, though – she didn't want to feel anything, no pain and no sadness. Just like she always wanted.

"Hey, want to get out of this place?" Summer finally asks as Rachel went to walk back into the school for the next lesson, before nodding slowly as she was unsure if she would be able to turn the offer down, "We have to run then." She whispers, winking at Rachel before taking off.

"Oh god." Rachel mutters, running to catch up with the other girl. "Simon is meeting us at the gates. You know if you're spotted, there will be a phone call home?" Rachel shrugged, reminding the girl that nobody was home at the moment, smiling as Summer nodded, neither of them actually caring if their parents were called.

"Just walk until I tell you to run, okay?" Rachel just nodded, loving the rush that breaking the rules she used to hold so close to her, gave now. The excitement had been something she had yearned for, and for a little while Glee club had given her that but that soon ended.

"RUN!" She laughed when she spotted none other than Mr. Shue heading towards them. Summer managed to get there before Rachel, and jumped over the tiny, pointless school gate. Rachel soon followed, grinning when she saw Simon.

Everything was a blur after that, she had never felt so good but so bad at the same time. They ran from school – with Simon – and ended up in the mall. Summer started stealing some clothes, which Rachel soon joined in. It wasn't long until they were caught, and Rachel could just remember that it was the fastest she had ever run in her life. And then they ended up at her house.

The small bits inbetween had faded into one misty memory.

They all giggled loudly as Rachel and Simon collapsed on the floor, both breathing heavily as Summer sat on the bed, lighting her fourth batch of pot that day. "Don't be so selfish." Rachel whined, lifting her hand up and grinning when Summer handed her some, taking no time in lighting it with the help of Simon.

She watched him as he moved to his side, watching her, "I'll be right back, don't do anything I wouldn't do." Summer spoke up, walking out of the room as she winked at them. Rachel just shook her head, and then stared at Simon, who was still laying next to her with his hand on his head. She didn't think anything of it when his lips came crashing to hers, in fact, she lets him kiss her. Since hanging out with Summer, she had kissed many guys, she had even done more. It wasn't the big deal it once was.

She laughed loudly, somewhat nervously when he moved to lay on top of her, smirking down at the girl. "You're very beautiful." He whispered, Rachel blushed and looked away, not seeing him pull something from his pocket.

"Try this, it's so much better.. it'll give you what you're looking for.. you'll forget everything. I promise." She looked at the small packed in his hands that contained white powder, and she nodded before taking it from him.

He grins and lifts her chin to kiss her lips once more, she pulled away slightly, "How much do you want for it?"

"This is more than enough." He looked down at her, gesturing to their position. She grinned and kissed him full on, hearing the door open but she didn't even bother looking up. She could feel his hand crawling up her stomach. She closes her eyes for a moment, remembering a time when she would have been shaking with discomfort, a time when she would have been nervous – even with Finn, the person she loved so much. She had no idea what was happening to her, she didn't know anything anymore. She would look in the mirror sometimes, and now even recognise the person looking back at her. She doesn't know who she is, who she has become. She doesn't think anyone can anymore. Where was the old Rachel?

~ .. ~

"Rachel, eat your dinner." Her dad looked at his daughter, a stern look on his face. Rachel just shrugged them off, watching as he just shook his head at the shadow that was his daughter. Rachel looks down at the food, pushing her plate away as she gets up from her seat and heads for her bedroom.

"Summer is coming over in a minute, I ain't hungry." She mutters, not even looking either of her dad's in the eyes as she speaks,

"Sit down and eat your dinner, now!" She could feel the anger radiating through the room, and she just grinned, "Whatever Leroy." She could see the hurt in his eyes, but she no longer cared. "Leroy?"

"Yeah.. that's your name, right?" She raised an eyebrow, smirking before folding her arms over her chest. She watched him exchange a look with her daddy, "I'm your dad, Rachel." He whispered, too hurt to be angry anymore.

"Whatever." She heaved a deep sigh, running to the door when it knocks, grinning at the person on the other side. "Hey Berries!" Rachel didn't bother hiding her laugh as she ran to her bedroom with Summer not too far behind her.

"Got anything on you?" She whispers as she shuts the door behind her, grinning when Summer pulls out a packet of white powder, just like the one Simon had given her the other night. She remembered the feeling it had given her, the total freedom and the painless word it had offered.

She watched her friend before copying her actions, and soon enough they're both laying on the floor, giggling like little children. Rachel looks up at the ceiling, watching the shapes and the colours dance around, each one making her giggle, ignoring the banging door, and the shouts coming from her angry and upset dads. She doesn't even notice either of them until a sudden yanking on her arm brings her out of her little dream world. She shakes her head, trying to ignore them as she looked at Summer. "What?"

"It stinks in here." One of them finally spoke up,

"Get out then." She rolled her eyes, trying to remove her arm from his strong grip,

"I want you gone!" Her daddy finally spoke up for what seemed like the first time, pointing at Summer, glaring at the girl when she walked out, "Whatever you say, sir!" She saluted them both, making Rachel giggle.

"How dare you chuck my friend out?" She shouted, pulling her arm from her father, stepping back, only then noticing the packet he held in his clenched fist. She clenches her own for a moment, and then turns around to hide the hot, burning tears running down her face, "What do you want from me?"

"Are you on drugs, Rachel? Are you high right now?" He grabs her shoulder – hard – pulling her around to face him so he can look his daughter in the face, just to see if his little star was in there somewhere. Rachel sighs, admitting defeat, "Whatever, Leroy." She hisses the name out, smirking as she does, "You've caught me. You can't do anything to me. I. Don't. Care."

"You're grounded."

"Whatever, I have a window, what the fuck are you going to do? Seal it up? Bar me in her? Lock me away until I'm the good little star you brought up?" He looks at his daughter, unsure who she even was anymore. But Rachel rolls her eyes, she doesn't know who she is, she doesn't expect anyone else to.

"Get out of my bedroom!" She screams, ignoring the tears running down their faces as she goes to push them out,

"Let's talk about this, Rachel."

"I don't want to talk, I don't need to talk. Just get out and leave me the fuck alone." She screams as loud as she can, slamming it in their faces. She kicks a beer can away from her and watches it roll under her bed. When did it all get so hard?

She sighs loudly and looks at her reflection before jumping from her window, grinning to herself. Nobody rules her, she doesn't care about them anymore. She can do what she wants, when she wants.

And as soon as her feet hit the ground, she does the only thing she has done lately... she runs. She runs as fast as she possibly can, not turning back to look at the house she used to call home, not looking back to her dad's, not turning back to the old Rachel.

And for what? To get a fix.