Last year-
I hate school. The only reason why I even make the effort to go is to see everyone, and even then, I don't talk to them. It's just nice seeing everyone alive and not locked up in the hospital. That would suck… and that would be scary. I get out of bed, and hear my phone ring, and surprise surprise, it's Craig.
"Where are you?"
"It's 7 in the morning." I yawn. "Why are you awake? You're usually the last person to get to class."
"Yeah I know. I left my house early because I didn't want to deal with my parents. And I'm stuck with-"
"Craig! Stop sexting to your psycho boyfriend, fag!" A short five seconds of silence was taken away from my conversation with Craig so he could flip off Cartman. God, I wish he could just leave us alone. Why does Stan, Kyle, and Kenny even put up with him? Who even likes him? I sometimes see Wendy looking at him… But I think that's my mind going crazy.
I think I'm the only one that does this, but do you ever feel like you're the one that notices… Things? No, not like underpants gnomes, I know for a fact that they're real, but the little things about people. Like the way Wendy looks at Cartman, the way Kyle looks at Stan, How Token looks at Clyde, how often Bebe rolls her eyes at Clyde, how ugly Clyde looks when he's crying… The way Craig always wants to be around me. Or maybe the things that I notice are little conversations that people have behind other people. How Wendy's still jealous of Bebe for having bigger tits… God, I'm so creepy. No wonder why people try to avoid me. But it isn't my fault! People just speak too loud! Ugh… I don't want to deal with Cartman… I'll just go so Craig doesn't get pissed at me…
School isn't that far from my house, so I just walk their. I don't trust public transportation, there's usually some Tweaker… Heh, Tweeker, there's usually some crazy person excessively shaking or making small threats on the bus to me. Does other places in America have shady public transportation also?
I get off the bus as fast as I can, and see Craig waiting outside, smoking a cigarette with Wendy and Cartman. So the school bad boy, the ultra outspoken Liberal girl, and the Nazi are smoking a cigarette outside of school. This is going to be great.
"Shut up you hoe! I'm not fat, I'm just pudgy!" Cartman yells. Wendy rolls her eyes and blows her smoke in front of his face.
"Screw you, asshole! Why am I even here? I don't even like you and I don't even speak to Craig!" Craig flips off Wendy and rolls his eyes.
"Why are both of you here to begin with?"
"The girls and I are setting up the next rally today, but they probably all forgot, and the damn administrators probably forgot also since the doors are locked."
"I'm here because I want to be here! Why are you here, Craig?" Cartman asks, "What the fuck are you gonna do, butt fuck your boyfriend in public?" Craig flips him off.
"Screw you, just because we pretended to date in elementary school…" Wendy smiles to herself, probably thinking some weird gay, yaoi thoughts about Craig and me. Oh Jesus, I've never felt more violated before in my life back then! Craig look my way and waves me over. Oh God, here we go. Cartman grins evilly at me, and I squirm a bit, and feel myself involuntarily hide behind Craig.
"Speak of the devil…"
"Screw you, Cartman!" I yell. "Why are you so obsessed with anal sex anyways? Are you secretly gay or something!?"
"Fuck you asshole! Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. Either way, I'm getting more pussy than you or your boyfriend ever will!" I shake my head in exasperation and drink the rest of my coffee in my thermos. Craig looks at me in concern, and notices the two other thermoses have in my backpack.
"Coffeeholic. You need to stop."
"Don't tell me how to live my life!"
"Yeah Craig, if you take away Tweek's coffee, all he'll have is you! And that's not saying much!" Wendy slaps Cartman in the face, and brings him closer to yell in his ear,
"Don't obstruct their love!" Gods, why is everyone so damn crazy in South Park!?
This year-
It's been about a week since Craig stayed with me that late at Harbucks. He's been keeping his word, staying with me after school until closing time. He brings his homework and laptop now, and I think I've gotten used to it. I don't think his parents even care, though that's not surprising. Sometimes he brings alone Jimmy, sometimes Clyde, sometimes Token, sometimes it's two of them or all three of them. Clyde's still crying, Token's still trying to get into Clyde's pants, and Jimmy's still telling jokes. Even if I almost did kill Cartman, it's like it's normal again, but not exactly.
Bebe and Wendy stop by Harbucks to work their first day. After a while, I've noticed Bebe always uncomfortably looking at Clyde and rolling her eyes as she and Wendy make drinks and I tend the cash register and take orders. It's routine now. Bebe comes in on Sundays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Wendy comes in on Saturdays, Mondays, and Thursdays. I refused to let them work on Tuesdays… Tuesdays are my quiet days.
It's Thursday today, and Wendy stays near the coffee machines and grinders, far away from me as possible. She looks nervous, probably because Cartman's back in town from the hospital and Stan's going to flip soon… I don't know why, but I just have a feeling, like he's going to barge in with Kyle, Kenny and Butters. Any moment now…
Craig sips his tea and sighs blissfully in it's aroma. Surprisingly, Wendy's really good at making drinks. I guess I'm a better teacher than I thought. I lean against the counter, playing on my phone on some dumb game I'm going to end up deleting tonight. Any moment now, there's going to be a shit show… Any moment now…
"Tweekers."
"NGH! What do you want!?" Craig rolls his eyes and hands me the mug and some money.
"Istanbul Treat, please." I put the money in the cash register and signal Wendy to make it. Ok… I'll admit, it's been relaxing, not having to do much. It's still an invasion of privacy. Wendy looks at me from the corner of her eye, I can feel it, but I don't say anything. I want to see if she has the balls to say something to me.
"So… Tweek."
"What- NGH! -do you want?!"
"Um… How are you?" Fuck, we're going to do this shit again.
"I'm… Fine. How are you?" Mom told me that I need to make the effort to be nice again, no matter how much it hurts or some bullshit like that. Wendy smiles at me and continues to make Craig's tea.
"I'm good. I'm thinking about breaking up with Stan." That's a shocker.
"Did you hear that Cartman's coming back to South Park?" I ask. Wendy pauses for a while, and erases her smile, but immediately plasters it back on.
"Y-yeah, I heard. I hope he's changed, but he probably hasn't." This weird love triangle going on between Stan, Wendy and Cartman is one of the most awkward bullshit I've seen in my life. And I've almost killed a person before, so that's saying something. I can tell I'm making Wendy uncomfortable, and as much as I want to see her perfect self suffer and squirm, I stop.
"Tweekers."
"NGH! Craig."
"Wanna do anything tonight?"
"No."
"Wanna watch red racer tonight?"
"No."
"Cool, see ya tonight at my place." I roll my eyes and wash some dishes in the back. This asshole.
Near closing time, Craig leaves the cafe to get ready for Red Racer. Fuck, am I really going to this shit? Wendy left a while ago, but didn't say bye or anything. I did see Stan constantly texting her some bullshit about being needy for sex or something. Ugh, I can't even think about sex or anything like that. I don't even if I'm gay, bi or straight. Who knows, maybe I don't want anyone at all.
I'm just happy that Cartman didn't show up today. Guess I'll see him on Monday.
