Under Black Wings, Part Three
A Sailor Moon Fan Fiction by Thomas Sewellsewell_thomas@hotmail.com
...... = thought quotation
Chapter 6: Who Will Win Mamoru?
CARMEN GONSOLES had a name that one might assume belonged to a Chicana, a Mexicana, or a young woman from elsewhere in Latin America, especially California and more especially in the Silicon Valley, of which Stanford University was the western terminus. A blonde, blue-eyed, and long-legged beauty was not what one would have expected at all.
Carmen could speak Spanish, as well as fair French, but English was her mother tongue. She'd grown up in Grosse Pointe, Michigan, with side trips to Europe and the highest-class areas of the United States.
Carmen wanted to be more than another deb, and then another helpmeet to an executive like her father. She liked challenges. That was a big part of her decision to go into medicine. Once she had made her decision, she proceeded at warp speed, finishing high-school early and then getting her bachelor's in three years. She was in her third year of medical school when she first really started noticing Mamoru Chiba, though she had run across him before.
Chiba was gorgeous and he knew it, and he flirted shamelessly with every girl who would put up with it--and with older women. Carmen remembered that from her previous encounters. But now that he was starting medical school, she saw him more often, and discovered he was not what she had first thought. She noticed that he never left with any of the girls or women he flirted with. Stanford was quite sensitive to sexual harassment now, thanks to some bad publicity from a few years earlier. Carmen did have a friendly ear or two in Administration by her third year, and from them she found that Chiba didn't have any complaints filed on him. So, the flirting wasn't serious, and he was sensitive enough not to play his little game with anyone who might misunderstand.
Including herself, Carmen realized.
From that moment, Mamoru Chiba presented a challenge to Carmen Gonsoles. A lesser man would have been doomed . . .
Once Carmen had decided Mamoru Chiba was worth pursuing, at least for awhile, she took the direct approach. Noticing him in the hospital cafeteria, she sat down across from him and said, "Hi. I'm Carmen. Remember me?"
Chiba looked up from his meal and said, "Yes. You proctored Dr. Nan's last test, didn't you?"
"Yes," said Carmen, "But I've seen you around for ages."
He held out his hand, and she shook it. "Chiba Mamoru. Or Mamoru Chiba, as you style your names here."
Good. I couldn't call him by name before, or he would have known I'd been doing a little snooping. "Mamoru. Japanese?"
"Yes. I'm from Tokyo. I've lived in Japan most of my life. And you?"
Carmen replied, "From the wilds of Michigan. Grosse Pointe."
"Very rich wilds, I have heard," said Chiba.
"Yes." Sharp, not just in medicine . . . "Did you hear about the recital Friday night?"
"Yes."
"Would you like to go? Somebody gave me a couple of tickets." After I gave them a couple of hundred.
Chiba said, "Yes, but I'm afraid I already have tickets. And I'm going with someone. But it will be good to see you there. I'm sure you can find someone else who will want to go."
Carmen said, "Oh, I think that's a safe bet . . . Geez, it's later than I thought. Gotta run!"
"But your food?"
Carmen was more interested in a quick exit. "You can have what you want. See you!"
Ginger Han was not enthusiastic. "A recital? I was going to Shoreline to catch the Stones."
"The Stones? Are you going with your mother?" sneered Carmen.
Ginger said, "No, with Kenny. They have a couple of great warm-up bands, and, you know, maybe I'll get to see one of them die on stage."
"How could you tell?" asked Carmen rhetorically. "Ginny, you owe me. And Kenny?" Very low on the food chain, Kenny.
Ginger whined, "Well, I really wanted to go . . . why me? You could get a guy."
Carmen said, "I don't want just a guy. I want a particular guy."
"Then why not go with him?" asked Ginger.
"Because he's going with someone else," said Carmen.
"Oh, I see. You go with me, so I'm not in the way when you make your move." This was not the first time Carmen had used Ginger as a decoy.
Carmen said, "Yes, my lackey, that is my evil plan . . . do you have a formal that isn't too extreme?"
"You mean, that doesn't show off my boobs?" said Ginger Han.
"Yes, dairy queen."
Ginger began beating Carmen with a pillow.
Carmen and Ginger got to the recital just in time, and had to sit in the very back. Carmen could see that Chiba was sitting in the front row, next to a statuesque brown-haired girl only slightly shorter than himself. Carmen caught enough glimpses of her profile to see that she had an even larger bosom than Ginger. There was someone sitting at Mamoru's right, but the person was so short Carmen was not even sure of the sex until she caught a glimpse of a bare shoulder.
Once the recital started, Carmen paid more attention to the music. The violinist was clearly a prodigy, but not altogether pleasing; perhaps her style was too unconventional to be appreciated. She was icy, elegant, and almost supernaturally graceful. The pianist was technically flawless, but not at the level of his partner. Between pieces, Carmen said to Ginger, "He's good, but he needs more experience. And it sounds to me like he might be holding back to make her seem better."
"Who cares!" exclaimed Ginger. "Look at him!" She was all but licking her chops.
In the middle of the next piece, however, came an unexpected interruption. A baby wailed. The pianist got up and disappeared offstage. The violinist apologized to the audience. "I'm sorry, but our baby needs Haruka now." Then she played a couple of solo pieces without notes.
During the second break for applause, Carmen remarked. "She's better than I thought at first."
"Who cares. They have a baby," said a much-deflated Ginger Han.
"Yes," said Carmen, deciding to rub it in a bit. "She's quite the performer. Playing while her guy takes care of the kid."
"Yeah. What a guy . . . what's your guy doing?"
Chiba took the stage, exchanged a few words with the violinist, and then sat down at the piano. He played well, though clearly inferior to the tall blonde he had replaced.
When the recital ended, Carmen dragged Ginger up to the stage. She was dismayed to find not only the statuesque girl there first, but two more girls from the front row. There was a stunning raven-haired girl in a red silk cheongsam, plying a fan with elegant subtlety as she talked. Beside her was a blonde who practically oozed pheronomes, and yet conveyed innocence--big trouble! Both the girls seemed to know the violinist quite well--and Chiba. But Chiba was not so absorbed in them and the others on the stage to ignore Carmen. He introduced Carmen, and Carmen did the same for Ginger. That was about all that happened for awhile, from Carmen's viewpoint.
Then Chiba and the Violinist headed offstage in the direction the pianist had vanished. Carmen noticed that Ginger had disappeared. She followed Chiba as subtly as she could. She managed to catch up with him just as the violinist turned off the corridor into a side room, and a woman emerged from the same room.
Chiba stopped so quickly Carmen actually ran into his back before she could stop herself. She muttered an apology, but Chiba didn't seem to take notice. Instead, after a moment, he said, "Usako."
"Mamoru," said the woman--young, Carmen saw, but definitely a woman, complete with a child on her hip. She was shorter than Carmen but still tall for a woman. She had blond hair, the same shade as Carmen's. The woman also had blue eyes, though a deeper blue than Carmen's, and set under almond lids. She was wearing a simple black dress, barely a formal. The child was a little girl, in a little middie-dress. She was perhaps a year old, with strawberry-blond curls, and light brown eyes which looked at Carmen . . . and seemed to look through her, as well. Carmen Gonsoles shivered for a moment, before she was able to rationalize away the odd moment of perception. Then she blinked, stepping back just a bit, and said, "Your little one has good lungs."
The woman in black replied, "If you mean, she cries very loudly, she does, when she cries. But it was Haruka's baby that you heard. Sarah seldom cries. Not much scares my little moon." The woman glanced back at Chiba, who bent down for a moment to kiss the head of the child, and then went into the room.
Instead of following Chiba, Carmen stayed in place. The young woman was an element she had not anticipated. "Are you Chiba's ex? Is this his kid?"
"We were engaged once, but, no, Sarah is not his child."
Carmen noticed that two of the girls he had seen earlier passed her on either side, and formed up on either side of the woman in black: Rei, the girl in the cheongsam, and Minako, the first blonde. A third person passed, and stood between her and the woman with the child, someone she had barely noticed. She was an older child, pre-adolescent, and she looked fragile, but she was another one with unsettling eyes, which were so dark it was hard to see they had pupils--although when light caught them, Carmen could see that they were actually not black but a very deep purple.
The woman in black put a hand out on the shoulder of the girl, who was also in black, and said, "It is all right, Hotaru. Carmen means no harm."
Carmen put on a smile, and then went into the room Chiba had entered. Inside, she found Mamoru speaking with the violinist and the pianist. The pianist was sitting with his back to Carmen, with the violinist at his side, and both were facing Chiba. The jacket he had worn was hanging on the back of his chair. Ginger Han was also in front of the pianist, staring at him. While Carmen was wondering why Ginger seemed transfixed, Chiba kissed the violinist on the cheek, and then bent down to do the same to the pianist.
Oh, no. Bi-guy. How did I miss that? Carmen made up her mind to cut her losses and retreat, but she had to get Ginger first, who seemed to be hypnotized.
"Ginny, there you are," she said, passing by the pianist to grab Ginger's wrists. "I wondered where you'd run off to. Come on, we've got to get going, remember? Remember?"
Ginger took the hint at last. "Oh, yeah. Uh, nice to meet you guys."
"I am sorry I could not play the whole recital, but Titania needed me," Carmen heard the pianist say.
"She just won't take the bottle sometimes," said the violinist. Carmen had turned back just in time to see the violinist finish her comment by caressing the infant's head.
The infant that the pianist had at her breast.
Carmen, of course, would dig at Ginger mercilessly for weeks for mistaking the pianist for a man, even though she had made the same mistake. She would actually convince Ginger she had known from the first.
But that evening wasn't quite over. Carmen had come up with a fallback plan: ambush Chiba on his way out of the recital hall. When he came out, however, he was with none of the girls she had noticed. Instead, he was with a little mouse of a girl with glasses, who hung on his arm as if she were afraid to lose him.
She decided to let him run free, for the moment. Taking a man away from a little mouse like that would be like drowning a kitten. But if Chiba left her, Carmen would be ready for another run at him.
Medical school was hard work, even for someone as brilliant as Carmen Gonsoles. She did not have a lot of time to brood over the problem of Mamoru Chiba, and she did not lack for dates when she wanted them. None of the young men or not-so-young men she went out with really interested her, though. Carmen found she could manipulate every one of them with hardly an effort. Some of them were nice enough for her to try to fix up with Ginger Han, but they would never do as steady fare for Carmen.
Several months after the recital, Carmen saw Chiba with the girl who had worn the red cheongsam and plied the fan. They were walking arm-in-arm.
A few days after that, in the plaza outside the campus bookstore, Carmen spotted the mousy girl at a table, eating a sandwich while she read. Carmen went to her. "Excuse me. Didn't I see you with Mamoru Chiba once or twice?"
The girl looked up at her, a little startled. She recovered in a moment, and answered. "Yes. I remember Mamoru introducing you. Carmen Gonsoles? You are in third-year?"
Carmen said, "Yes . . . I'm afraid I've forgotten your name. I've hardly seen you with Chiba since. He seems to keep you a secret."
The mouse said, "I don't like to go out that often. And Mamoru and I are no longer together."
"I'm sorry," said Carmen.
The mouse said, "Why? It is not your fault. Do you want to sit down?"
"Uhhh . . . Yeah. Thanks." Once she had settled in place, Carmen said, "Listen . . . I saw Chiba with someone else a few days ago. I think she was at the recital."
The mouse said, "Hino-san. He is dating Hino Rei now, mostly."
Carmen asked, "How well do you know her?"
"She is one of my best friends."
Carmen said, "Hell of a friend, to take him away from you."
The mouse retorted, "She did not take Mamoru away. I broke up with him."
"You did? Why, on earth?" Chiba was too big a fish to casually throw back in the water.
Ami the mouse-girl, who had been nibbling at her sandwich and reading her book all through this--a biochemical text in German--put down her sandwich and closed her book. "Why are you so interested in Mamoru?"
Carmen recoiled slightly. The mouse seemed to have turned into a cat for the moment, and Carmen wondered if she should find a hidey-hole. But the girl was smiling in a sly but benign way . . . "He's interesting. I thought I might like to go out with him sometime."
The girl said, "Yes . . . you are very pretty, and smart, and you are going to be a doctor, like Mamoru or me. And you are Mamoru's age. Mamo-chan was always uncomfortable with us being younger."
"Us?"
The girl said, "Usagi and I. And Hino-san, now."
"Usagi?" Carmen wondered what she had started here.
"She was Mamoru's fiancee." The girl lost most of her smile.
"The one with the baby? I mean . . ." Carmen had put the strange encounter in the back of her mind, but now she remembered.
"Yes, Usagi has a baby," said the girl.
"But not his," said Carmen. She remembered that, now . . .
"No."
Carmen sat in silence for several moments. Discovering that she had the initiative again, she asked, "Why did you break up with him? I mean, I didn't see you with him very much, but you looked like you wanted him a lot. Like you really loved him."
The girl said, "I will always love Mamo-chan. But that does not mean we should be together."
Carmen asked, "What was it? Was he seeing someone else on the side?"
"No. He was not cheating on me."
"Then what?" asked Carmen.
The girl sighed, took of her glasses, and kneaded the bride of her nose for a moment. "When we made love, he would call me 'Usako.' Not always, but . . ."
"Then he was cheating?" said Carmen.
"No," said the girl. "He was faithful to me. But Usagi still holds his heart."
Carmen said, "If he still loves this Usako or Usagi or whoever, why doesn't he just get back together with her?"
"Usagi will not allow it," said the girl, quite forcefully.
Carmen thought about that for a few moments. The girl said nothing more, but waited for her to respond. Finally Carmen asked her about what she thought of Stanford, and that led to quite a long conversation. Carmen found she liked Ami the little mouse, and made it a point in the following weeks to speak with her whenever she got the opportunity, even when she wasn't checking out Chiba.
While Carmen was getting to know Ami, the police in Palo Alto were puzzling over a murder. A man was found on a trail near the Stanford Campus. The police had no problem identifying him: Luther Ponds had a thick record of arrests. He was also an informant, which explained why he had been out of jail. It also might explain why he was dead.
It couldn't explain how. Ponds had drowned. How he had managed to do this miles from any body of water was a question that remained unanswered.
Chapter 7: Two Fires
REI COULD HAVE gone to Stanford, but she decided for UC Berkeley instead. She could still live with Usagi's family at the mansion. And she could also stay with her grandfather, who had surprised her by turning over Hikawa temple to a younger priest and coming to America. She had not really foreseen this, and it bothered her. Rei decided that her Grandfather was so close to her, there were things she had not allowed herself to see in him, even with her supernatural insights.
The most important reason for choosing Berkeley was that if she went with Ami to Stanford, she would see her with Mamoru constantly. There was only so much of that she could bear, and she wondered again how Usagi could do it.
But before the end of their first semesters, Ami broke up with Mamoru. He went out with other girls for awhile, including Rei, but as the dry, chilly winter warmed into a pleasant spring, it was Rei he went with most of the time, and then, all the time. Minako and Mako moved off; Rei did not have to ask them to know that they were leaving Mamoru to her.
This should have been all Rei wanted. After years of growing desire, suppressed for the sake of duty and for her love of Usagi, she had Mamoru. With the tiniest effort, she could have him, not only for a night, but forever. And yet they went on as steadies but not lovers, progressing no further than fiery kisses, deep embraces, a brush here, a momentary touch there.
Ami lived in a dorm at Stanford now, but when she visited, she nearly always stayed overnight. She had stayed with Mamoru many times. Now, she shared Rei's room, even though she could have taken a vacant one.
On a weekend when Mamoru wasn't free, after the lights were out and they were both in bed, Rei asked, "Ami-chan?"
"Yes?"
Rei stumbled through the next question. "If you don't think it is too . . . personal . . . could you tell me . . . how long you dated Mamoru before . . . before . . ."
"A month," said Ami. "We first made love four weeks after the first time we went out together."
After awhile, Rei asked, "What do you think of Mamo-chan and I? Do we seem right to you?"
Ami switched on her light and sat up. "Is what you mean, do I give you permission to make love? That is between you and Mamo-chan."
Rei said, "I . . . I don't know. I want to . . . so much. You can't say it won't hurt you if I do."
"No more than I hurt you when I made love with him. Surely no more than I hurt Usagi." Ami sighed. "But maybe he will not call out 'Usako' when you are making love. You have the fire. You have loved him for a long time, and known it. Do not hold back because of me."
Rei said, "I am not sure . . . Mamoru was your first, wasn't he?"
"Yes," sighed Ami. She switched off the light.
After awhile, Rei asked, "Are you seeing anyone else?"
Ami said, "Not really. I have had dates with some guys at Stanford, but nothing will come of them. I guess the closest I have to a boyfriend now is Sumi Kurume."
"You finally met him?" asked Rei.
Ami said, "Not really. But we send e-mail to each other a lot. He is a friend of Umino-san, and they have started an internet business together, with some others. He's funny, and very smart, of course."
Rei said, "Email does not sound very romantic . . . What about Urawa-san? What became of him, do you know?"
Ami said, "Yes. Kurume looked him up for me, and Ryo wrote me a letter. He is going to Cambridge. He met a girl there whose family came from India. They fell in love. When her family tried to get her to marry another Indian boy she did not know, they ran off to Scotland and got married. Her family was very angry, but now there is a baby coming, and they are beginning to accept Ryo. I am glad for him."
Ami had her own question. "Have you heard from Yuuichirou?"
Rei said, "I have heard from his mother again. She says that he is engaged now, and that she hopes I will not cause trouble."
Ami said, "But you haven't tried to reach Yuuichirou. Have you?"
Rei said, "No. But she said he got a letter from someone about me. She thinks it was really me pretending to write as someone else. I didn't answer. What to say?"
Two weeks and one date with Mamoru after, Rei was about to open the front door when it opened first. And there was Yuuichirou. He held his arms open and she walked into them.
"Well . . . I guess you haven't forgotten me."
Rei said, "I will never forget you . . . What are you doing here?"
Before Yuuichirou answered they were swallowed up by the others. It turned out Yuuichirou had come only minutes before she got back from her last class. Everyone wanted to talk with him, especially her grandfather, who now seemed to think Yuuichirou was altogether a fine fellow, now that he wasn't after his granddaughter.
He could only stay one night; he had to meet his fiancée and her family in New York City. "A big charity function. A big night for my mother and Sumiko. Father never did that sort of thing."
"Then you should be there for her," said Rei. "Did you tell your mother you were stopping here?"
"Yes," said Yuuichirou.
"She does not like me very much," said Rei.
Yuuichirou shrugged. "I told her. And Sumiko, my fiancee. I wouldn't have come if I hadn't done that. Besides, you have Chiba-san now. After I tell my mother that, I think she will stop fussing. I think a lot of this is because of losing my father, anyway. It's not like my mother to stay angry with people unless they are really bad. She could never believe you are a bad person. Bad for me, yes, but not a bad person."
Rei waited until she heard no one moving in the house before getting out of bed. She didn't bother getting a robe; that would only waste time and perhaps make enough noise to wake Ami--if she was really asleep.
Rei did worry that Yuuichirou might have locked the door to his room, but he had not. She entered quietly, although she did not take especially stealthy measures.
She paused to listen to his breathing. This time she was sure: she had heard him sleeping often enough at the temple. He was not sleeping.
She thought about slipping out of her pajamas, but she remembered what Nancy had told Ami. If I have to think about it, the time isn't right. But she did walk to his bed, pull up the bedclothes, and slip under them.
His back was to her. She felt cloth on his legs, but his chest was bare. She kissed him on his back, just at the hard spot at the base of his neck. She said, "This night for me. Sumiko will have all your others." Then Rei spooned up to Yuuichirou, and waited for whatever he would do.
The spring after that was a pretty miserable one, almost as bad as the winter before it. But by the end of finals week, the season became a wonderful summer. Rei would have walked home on such a day. But now she had Deja, who seemed to have been born with a fine sense of timing--she wouldn't fuss much unless Rei was late coming home.
As she walked up to the front door from the bus, it opened. Usagi was there, with Chibi-Usa holding on to her leg--Sarah, better to call her that--and so was Ami.
"What is happening?" Rei asked.
"You have a visitor," said Usagi, scooping up Chibi-Usa.
Sitting on one of the many couches in the huge front room was Usagi's mother, Minako's mother, and between them, Yuuichirou's mother. Yuuichirou's mother had Deja in her arms.
Everyone else went elsewhere, leaving Rei alone with Yuuichirou's mother and Deja. Rei took Deja from her as she sat down next to her. Yuuichirou's mother moved away a little, and watched Rei while she played with Deja. I am here now. I love you. You are mine. I am yours.
"When were you going to tell Yuuichirou?" asked Yuuichirou's mother.
Rei said, "Not soon. When she is old enough to wonder about her father."
"Why did you keep this secret?"
"Your son was about to get married," said Rei.
"Do you think Sumiko would be hurt any less if she found out later?"
Rei said, "No. But when she has had years together with Yuuichirou, she will not want to lose him, not forever. And they should have children of their own. Is there one yet?"
Yuuichirou's mother asked, "Why did you do this thing?"
Rei held Deja close; she was nodding off. She gently rocked her body back and forth.
"Why did you do this?" the woman persisted.
"Do what? Have Deja?" said Rei.
"Why did you sleep with my son?" Yuuichirou's mother asked.
Rei said, "I may never be sure . . . but he loved me for so long, and I returned so little. I was going with Mamoru, the one I always thought I wanted. I could have had him forever. But I did not make love with him. If I had, he would have been mine forever. But it never felt right. One night with Yuuichirou felt more right than a life with Mamo-chan." She turned away from Yuuichirou's mother to let a couple of errant tears run down. Still facing away, she said, "Don't think I will pine away for your son. I'll find another, one who will be just mine. Not Sumiko's, not Usagi's. I'll find someone. And I am not poor. Deja will lack for nothing she truly needs."
After some time, Yuuichirou's mother asked, "Why did you name her Deja?"
Rei said, "Oh, it is silly . . . it is from one of those old novels Usagi likes to read. Deja was a Princess of Mars. I liked the name. It . . . seemed right."
Rei felt hands on her shoulders. "If my son were to leave his wife and come to you, would you be for him? Or would you play with him until you tired of him, and throw him away, as you did?"
Rei blurted, "It was not like that . . . I hurt him, but I did not know how much . . . But I will not take him from his wife. If I wanted to do that, all I would have had to do was tell him about Deja."
Yuuichirou's mother said, "Tell me, what would you do, if you took my son? Exactly."
Looking down into Deja's little face, seeing so much of her father there, Rei said, "I would be a bossy American-style wife. My career would come first. I would fuss over him, and argue with him. I would fight anyone who tells me any bad thing about him, even if I agree. I would make him change diapers, do laundry, learn to sew a little, learn to cook better than I can. I would make him teach Deja to ski as soon as she is big enough. I would . . . I would . . . "
The hands on her shoulders squeezed. "My son did not marry Sumiko."
Chapter 8: Carmen Gonsoles
CARMEN GONSOLES was missing Ginger Han terribly by her third month of internship. Ginger was doing her internship in New York. So she was very glad to see a sympathetic face: Ami Mizuno's. As usual, Ami was eating a sandwich over an open book, but she had a companion: an incredibly geeky-looking Japanese boy.
"Who's your new friend?" asked Carmen, sitting down at their table.
Ami said, "This is Mercurius, otherwise known as Sumi Kurume. Or Kurume Sumi, here. Kurume-chan, this is my friend Carmen Gonsoles."
The geek replied, "I am pleased to finally meet you. Ami-chan has told me much about you."
Carmen said, "Lies. All lies. What are you doing here? I thought you lived in Japan"
Sumi said, "I have come to live here. It is the best place for my business, and I get to be near Ami-chan now. In fact--"
Ami interrupted--something that she seldom did, at least in casual situations. "Carmen, are you free for the weekend?"
Carmen said, "Yes, for once. 72 glorious hours. I plan on sleeping for 71 of them."
"Want to sleep with me?" asked Ami.
"What?" Carmen did not expect to hear that phrase from Ami.
Ami sneezed, which Carmen knew now was a sign she was embarassed. "What I mean is . . . how about coming with me for the weekend? I will staying in Kensington with my friends. You have never been there."
"Well . . ." She felt Ami's shoe digging into her shin. "Yeah, why not?"
Carmen had been hearing about "the place in Kensington" from Ami or even occasionally from Mamoru for two years by then, but actually going there was an overwhelming experience. It was not that it was a mansion--Carmen had never lived in one, but she had been in plenty of mansions in Grosse Pointe and elsewhere. It was all the life going on.
First, there was Umino and his family. Carmen had known him for awhile through Ami, before he had dropped out of Stanford, and she had known he was married and had a child. The first person she met at the mansion was his wife, who introduced herself as Naru. She had a baby on her hip, and obviously was going to have another one in a few more months. Two more children came up to her while Naru was introducing herself: two little girls, one of them obviously Umino's, the other--
The other was familiar. She was the child who had so unsettled Carmen when she had made her first disastrous run at Mamoru. And she still seemed to look through Carmen, although, mercifully, she ran off to play with Naru's girl after another moment.
Before Carmen had long to think about that, Rei Hino came up to her, carrying yet another child. Carmen hadn't seen Mamoru's post-Ami flame in a long time. Still, she was warm enough. She pointed out her husband. "That is my Yuuichirou there, with his mother. She has been staying with us for a long while."
"Who's the old man with her?" Carmen asked.
"Oh, that is my grandfather." Rei came close to whisper to Carmen. "They sleep together, but we are not supposed to notice."
Carmen had barely begun to digest this when she discovered that the violin music she was hearing was not from a stereo. Michiru was playing, oblivious to all the chaos around her. Haruka, her partner, was sitting on the floor at Michiru's feet, with her child in her lap. The child seemed rapt, watching Michiru play. And there was something else: Michiru was about as pregnant as Naru.
There was still more. Mamoru was nearby, standing arm in arm with Minako Aino, the blonde Carmen had marked down as big trouble so long ago now. Carmen had been right; Aino had been the obvious fixture in Mamoru's life almost from the moment Carmen noticed that Rei wasn't. Why did she wait? Carmen wondered again. By now she had seen Aino enough to see dozens of boys and men make perfect fools of themselves to attract her attention, while Aino didn't even seem to be aware of what they were about. Didn't seem--but Carmen had also heard Aino come up with a couple of astounding insights. The girl with the silly red ribbon in her hair was more than she seemed. She would have to be, to hold Chiba's attention for very long. Never booksmart, but streetsmart, somehow, despite her childlike aura. Carmen had kept her distance, even though she had no doubt that Minako had offered her friendship. In some ways, Aino seemed as spooky as Chiba's first ex, though Carmen could not find a reason for her feelings. It wasn't that Minako had Chiba. It was something else . . .
Carmen also noticed that Minako was holding on to Mamoru closely . . . exactly as she remembered Ami had, when it was her time with Chiba.
Carmen forced herself to unfocus on Chiba and his girlfriend, and spoke to Michiru. "Well, this is a production I hadn't heard of. This is why you dropped out of sight?"
Michiru put on one of her most inscrutable smiles, and replied, "Yes. I did not think I would have trouble like Haruka, but I was wrong . . . I'm not sorry. I don't know if I will tour again."
"Did you use a sperm bank?" Carmen asked, before thinking--Michiru always seemed to make her do that, on the few occasions they'd met since the recital.
Michiru said, "No. I wanted my child to know her father. Mamoru obliged . . . and Minako, of course."
Chiba was blushing, something Carmen had never seen before. It was clear to Carmen they hadn't been lovers, even though Michiru had let it seem so for a few seconds. Aino was laughing, but Carmen caught a false note in it, and something sad behind her dancing eyes.
After a few minutes of trivial conversation, Carmen followed Ami through a doorway that led into the basement. There she found Naru again, sitting alongside her husband as he typed on one of three keyboards. Kurume, Ami's much taller nerd-boy friend, was also working, along with a few other nerds, of assorted races and even including a nerd girl. "Welcome to Mercurius.com," said Ami.
"I would have liked to have stayed on at Stanford, but I just could not afford it," explained Umino, rubbing Naru's tummy a little later.
Every one of the nerds in the basement had more money than Carmen's father.
As they were settling in for the night, Ami remarked, "I used to share this room with Rei all the time, until she got married. You're the first to share it since then."
Carmen said, "Thank you. I'm honored. I mean, I mean that. I'm not just joking."
"I know," said Ami.
After thinking on it for awhile, Carmen asked, "What's up between Chiba and Aino?"
"What do you mean?" asked Ami ingenuously.
Ami's question did not sound right to Carmen. "I think you know what I mean. I may not know Aino that well. I'll be honest, I don't want to know her that well. But there's something up with her. If I can see it, it must be huge."
Ami did not answer her for a notable interval. "There is something huge, but I don't think I should tell you more. You should talk with her."
Carmen said, "Maybe . . . I don't know, she just sets me on edge. Not her fault, but she just spooks me. Almost as bad as Chiba's ex. Doesn't she live here?"
"Usagi?" said Ami.
"Yes. Where is she, anyway?" asked Carmen.
"She had a date after school," said Ami.
Carmen said, "But I didn't see her . . . oh. Well, she's a big girl now, I guess."
"Yes . . . " Ami was clearly uncomfortable talking about her friend.
After a few moments Ami spoke again. "Thank you for coming."
Carmen said, "Well, it wasn't any great sacrifice! I mean, gee, stay in this place instead of my dorm? You didn't have to kick me! Why did you do that, anyway?"
Ami said, "I wanted you especially because Sumi had just asked if I was going to stay over tonight."
Carmen said, "Oh. You wanted me to keep him from climbing all over you."
"Yes, that is it," said Ami blandly.
"Ami?"
"Yes?"
"Would you say I know you pretty well by now?" asked Carmen rhetorically.
"Yes."
"So, you want to tell me again why you wanted me here tonight?" Carmen asked.
Ami sighed. "I wanted you here because I was thinking about climbing over Kurume. It has been a long time since I made love."
Carmen said, "Wait a minute . . . let me guess. You want this guy, but you want him to think it's his idea."
Ami said, "Yes. Ideally. At least I want him to wait a little longer."
Carmen woke up later and couldn't sleep. Ami was oblivious. After awhile, Carmen decided on some herb tea, and quietly set out for the kitchen downstairs. As she approached the stairs, she spied Minako Aino on the first landing, kneeling, looking through the railing. Her face was lit up by a beam of moonlight, brightly enough for Carmen to see tears running down. She had a hand over her mouth, and was making no sound.
But there was sound, from below, somewhere in the great front room. Carmen went to the railing and looked for what Aino must be looking at, and found it. Silhouetted in an open doorway, two people were closely embraced, kissing. One had to be Chiba. The other . . . his ex; Carmen could see those strange little buns she almost always wore in her hair.
Something compelled Carmen to go to Aino on the landing rather than creep back to her room and forget about it. She simply led Aino back with her to her room, without a word.
All that Carmen did with Aino was sit with her on Carmen's bed, but she did it until it was light and Ami woke up. Even then, Aino said nothing about what she had seen, or why she was in their room.
Chiba was gone when they all came down to join the others for breakfast. Chiba's ex met Aino, and they went off somewhere alone for a long time. Then they returned, and Aino seemed to act as she always had before: cheerful, always helpful, a little goofy. But Carmen saw it was an act, and she didn't think she was the only one.
Carmen did not forget what had happened on her visit with Ami, but there were nine months of internship remaining. She discovered that Chiba wasn't seeing any of Ami's friends during that time, and a couple of remarkable facts. But she didn't have time to act on any of these.
Carmen Gonsoles had only seen her mother once in her internship year and her father not at all. When she returned to her family home in Grosse Pointe, Michigan, she had not set foot in it for nearly three years. It was unsettling to see how much had changed. Her baby sister Alison, the little surprise in her parent's lives, was twelve now. In not that many more years Alison would be off to college, and then what would their parents do with this house they already seemed to rattle around in? The hope that Matt would take it over with his own family had ended with his divorce six months into her internship.
Carmen would have gone crazy if Ginger Han hadn't come to visit for a day. She explained to her friend what it had been like. "Now they want grandchildren from me. Especially my mom. She keeps asking me about boys I've been seeing. She's even tried to set me up a couple of times."
Ginger asked, "What about Chiba? You dated him a couple of times."
Carmen said, "Yes, I went out with him a couple of times. And that was it. I couldn't help asking him about what was going on with the other girls."
Ginger said, "Enlighten me. I kinda lost track."
Carmen said, "Well, he was still with the blonde, Aino, when I started. Then three months along, she caught him making out with his old girlfriend. I was there, actually."
Ginger asked, "Which one, Ami or the one after her?" Ginger was fairly well acquainted with Ami.
Carmen explained, "No, no, before Ami. I think you only saw her once. Name's Usako--no, Usagi; Usako is a nickname Chiba always uses for her. Anyway, he knocked her up, and she had his kid, just before I left. But he'd already knocked up Aino and she had his kid. And he fathered another kid on that violinist, Michiru, though I think he was just a sperm donor there."
Ginger said, "You mean, the one with the girlfriend who looks like a guy?"
Carmen said, "Yeah, Haruka, that's her name. Anyway, for some reason the all had their kids at Stanford Hospital, and there is Chiba listed as the father of three kids by three different mothers in five months. And he just happens to be a medical student there. There was some talk, but they let him stay."
"Geez, what a total sleeze!" exclaimed Ginger.
Carmen shook her head. "I don't think so. It's just that it is a weird situation, and no one is talking to me about it, not even Ami."
"What situation? All of them pregnant?" asked Ginger.
Carmen said, "No, that's not what I meant. Aino--her name is Minako, and I got to know her pretty well--she backed off from Chiba to give his ex a clear shot. But his ex didn't take him back. Minako wouldn't explain why his ex won't take back Chiba. Even Ami wouldn't tell me. She just said there are some things she can't tell me."
Ginger asked, "What about Chiba? You just said you dated him while all this was going on."
Carmen shook her head. "Chiba told me he'd never really be over his ex, his 'Usako,' as he nearly always calls her. Really, he warned me. He would have left it at that, but I got just a little more out of him. I asked him why his ex wouldn't get back with him, even when she was having his kid. He said he couldn't tell me the reason, like the others. But he said she might be wrong. And that was it. I could never get him to even talk about it after that time."
"What do you think the big mystery is?" asked Ginger.
Carmen sighed. "I don't know. But I'm going to find out, no matter what I do with Chiba."
The mystery of Chiba's social life did not remain on Carmen's mind much longer. Three days later, Alison did not return home . . .
Chapter 9: Frog
"CARMEN?" she heard her mother say into the phone. "Yes . . . Carmen, it's for you."
One of the police officers asked, "Who is that?"
"Oh, it's one of Carmen's friends," explained her mother.
"I'll take it," said Carmen. "In my room." The cop who had spoken tried to follow her in, but she closed the door after giving him a cold stare. She felt bad about that as soon as she had done it, but not long. What good were the cops anyway?
Picking up the phone in her room, Carmen said, "This is Carmen."
Ami's voice answered; she didn't bother to identify herself. "Is it your sister that is missing? Alison Gonsoles?"
Carmen said, "Yes . . . she didn't come home from school. The cops found her bike. Someone must have grabbed her . . . Oh, god, they'll never find her in time, she's probably . . . " Probably dead.
Ami said, "I'll do all I can to help. Do the police have any idea who to look for?"
Carmen said, "Yes, but not much. Why--"
Ami cut her off, very insistant, very unlike Ami. "Tell me what they know. Please, I need to know."
Carmen told Ami about the car some people had seen by Aly's bike, and the man. Someone began knocking on the door while she was doing it. Then her mother came in with a policeman and said, "Honey, you have to get off the line. If Aly has been kidnapped--"
"Just a sec! Please?" Carmen cupped her hands over the pickup and said lowly, "I have to go now. The police say we need to keep the line free."
Ami said, "Wait, do you have your cell phone?"
Carmen said, "Yes, but it won't work here. I'm not subscribed."
Ami said, "Get it ready, if you can. Kurume can get it activated, I think. Don't give up!"
"Thank you . . ." Carmen hung up.
Another man, plainclothed but an obvious cop, came into her room in a few moments, while she was just sitting on her bed with her mother, not saying what she was thinking, what her mother was surely thinking. "Ms. Gonsoles, who were you speaking with on the phone?" the man asked.
"A friend," said Carmen.
"Who?" asked the cop.
"Ami Mizuno," said Carmen.
The cop persisted. "Can you tell me more about her? Have you known her long?"
Carmen was beginning to become irritated with this intrusive cop. "We've been close for a couple of years. Why?"
"Your friend knew your sister was missing," said the cop.
"Well, it's all over the news!" Carmen said bitterly.
The cop said, "Your friend was calling from California. I don't think this story is all over the news there."
"You were listening in?" asked Carmen.
The cop produced a badge: he was FBI. "Yes, we were."
"So you think Ami is involved in this?" Carmen exclaimed.
The FBI man said, "She asked you about what the police knew about your sister's abduction. That is something the abductor would want to know."
Carmen said, "No. No way! Mom, you've met her."
Carmen's mother said, "Yes, I have. She's one of the sweetest, gentlest people I've ever met."
"Maybe," said the FBI man, "But she might have some friends who aren't so sweet. I'd be interested in knowing who this Kurume is, who can activate cellphones. Could I see yours, by the way?"
Carmen spent much of the following hours telling the FBI agent about her experiences with Ami and, of course, Chiba, and the rest of Ami's circle. Her mother and then her father started to listen in. While she was revealing all this to the agent, Carmen felt terrible, but when there wasn't anything else to say, she felt worse. There was nothing but waiting again, with every hour making the odds worse that they would ever see Alison again, alive.
Then it was one day, and then two, and three . . . a week . . . a month . . . two months. No cops, no reporters, no more flyers to put up, for now. Alison's picture on a milk carton in the fridge. A stupid yellow ribbon on the door, another vain hope that no one would admit was such, in case there was one among them who still really believed Alison was alive, somewhere. Sorry, Stanford Hospital, I won't be accepting the residency.
Matt, who had once seemed so strong, moved out, transferred, ran away from their parents, really. Carmen was not a great forgiver, but she saw it was just too much for her brother. She herself was the only strong enough to keep her parents from completely breaking down. Strong enough, so far . . .
Amid all of this pain, there was still more. Ami didn't call, didn't write. Carmen made calls to California. Ami was gone; personal business; she couldn't be reached. Sorry, we can't say. Or don't know. Could Ami be mixed up in Alison's disappearance? Every fiber of Carmen's heart told her "no," but why had Ami dropped out of sight? Carmen even tried Chiba. He knew something, but I wasn't telling. He had ended the call with the same thought Ami had given her: "Don't give up hope."
The Gonsoles family was Catholic, on both sides, but not particularly religious. But now Carmen's parents started going to Mass regularly; she saw her mother working through her rosary. Carmen did not participate, and they did not ask. Carmen had said her last prayer on the third night after Alison vanished. She did not think she would ever say another.
It was Christmas Eve. Carmen was alone in her home. Her parents had insisted on going to midnight Mass, something they had done even when they hadn't been pious. The weather was bad, which was saying a lot in Michigan in December. Frigid gusts; ice on the streets. But Carmen's parents went. Carmen had stayed.
She watched the late news for awhile, but switched off when Alison was mentioned. She thought about checking to see if the yellow ribbon was still on the front door; it might have been blown off. But there might be a camera pointed at the door, at the house . . . she didn't even approach the windows, to look. I'm crazy to think they would do that, in this weather . . . but Carmen did not check the door, did not go to the windows, as midnight approached, and arrived, and passed.
She waited in silence. No radio. Nothing she wanted to hear on the stereo. The wind howled sometimes, but in between the gusts, not even the ticking of a clock. Carmen turned off the lights, except for the tree, and sat in the living room. There were gifts under the tree, for her mother, for her father, for herself . . . and for Alison. Even she had bought something for Alison, a little silver frog, with eyes of green crystal; a brooch. When Alison had been an annoying little nuisance, Carmen had called her "Frog."
Then there was a new sound. A chirping. Carmen was not sure what it was or where it was coming from or even if it was real, for many seconds. Then she remembered. It was the cellphone she had brought from Stanford. She found her way to her room without bothering to switch on the lights--moonlight poured in the side and back windows, and she had been sitting in the dark for a long time.
She had never gotten a subscription for it. She had plugged it into its charger on that first night, after the strange call from Ami . . .
She picked it up and activated it.
"Carmen?" The voice was Ami's.
Carmen said, "Yes . . . Ami? How . . ."
"Are your parents at home?" Ami asked.
Carmen continued to stumble over her words. "No, they are . . . how did . . ."
Ami said, "I have never been to your house. Do you have a pretty big back yard?"
"I guess . . . Ami, what is this about? Why . . . who?" Carmen could hear Ami talking to someone else, in Japanese, and other people speaking, too.
Ami asked, "Can you tell me how far away you are from your back yard right now, and about which direction?"
"What?" This call was so weird . . .
"Please, just tell me," said Ami.
Carmen made her best guesses, and then asked, "Why? I've been trying to find you for months now. Why do you--"
"Do you have a door in the back of your house?" asked Ami.
"Yes."
Ami commanded: "Go open it. You will understand everything you need to in a few minutes." And then the connection was cut.
It was so crazy, Carmen went to the back door and opened it and stood there shivering for a moment before she began to really think how crazy it was. The back yard was lit bright by the moon; then dark as cloud rolled in front of the moon, then bright again--
Philip and Marie Gonsoles returned to their home at almost three in the morning. They had stayed talking with parishioners who had known Alison. It was almost a wake, bittersweet, but it left them with something more than the familiar hollowness to go home with. By the time either thought about calling, it seemed pointless; they would be home soon, and, anyway, Carmen was surely asleep by now.
The porch light was on, and the livng room lights, set on a dim level. Marie peered in through the windows as they passed by before just before turning into their driveway. "I see Carmen. She's asleep on the couch."
Philip said, "I wonder how long she waited up . . . Geez, the door opener won't work. Probably ice in the tracks again. Probably just blown another fuse, too. Better than the motor . . . You might as well go inside. It'll take a few minutes to get 'er open."
Marie said, "All right. I'll have some hot eggnog ready for you when you get in. Or some chocolate?"
Philip said, "Just some decaf. Nothing heavy."
"All right," Marie said, getting out of the car.
Philip Gonsoles swore at the garage door while he wrestled with the latch, wondering if he would ever find a contractor who would fix the blasted thing or replace it with something that worked. He did this for perhaps a minute when he heard his wife scream. He scrambled into the house, almost falling on an icy patch on the walk.
"What's wrong?" he shouted, before he could take in the scene inside. Then he dropped to his knees.
There, in front of him, his wife was holding someone very closely, someone with long, blonde hair that you might think was Carmen if you expected to see Carmen. But Carmen was standing a few feet away.
It was Alison. She looked over her mother's shoulder, and said, "Hi, Daddy. Can we open the presents now?"
Next: Ginger Han lets Mamoru into her heart, and finally meets his mysterious ex.
Send Comments to: sewell_thomas@hotmail.com
Site: http://www.geocities.com/oldgringo2001/dream/
