ALLY:
I was at the hospital and my mom was right by me. This was the third time in the last few weeks I'd had to go to the hospital regarding my condition. I had no idea what I had, but it wasn't showing any signs of improvement. I was tightly grasping her hand. I whispered,
"Mom, I'm so nervous."
My mom kissed my hair.
"I don't blame you. I would be, too."
"But the worst part has nothing to do with my condition."
Mom asked me,
"What happened?"
I said,
"Well, my hormones and anxiety were getting out of hand, and then some asshat was catcalling me. He was making sexual comments to me, touched my cleavage and reached inside my bra. I was mortified."
"Did anyone see it?"
I said,
"Yes, actually, which I was very thankful for. You're never gonna guess who did."
I said,
"Do you remember Austin Moon?"
My mom chuckled.
"I've never met him, but I know you used to be in love with him."
I said,
"And outside from when I tried to talk to him that one time and it turned out to be a complete disaster, I actually talked to him for the first time and I learned a lot."
My mom asked,
"What did you learn?"
I said,
"That he works at Dick's Sporting Goods, he's studying to be a phys ed teacher and he's a single dad raising a one-year-old."
My mom said,
"I like this guy already."
I picked my black Game of Thrones water bottle as it was sitting by my foot. Game of Thrones was one of my favorite TV shows, along with Riverdale, Glee, Jane The Virgin, The Bold Type, Friends, Big Bang Theory, Pretty Little Liars, American Horror Story, The L word, Sex and the city, Once upon a time, Stranger Things, Doctor Who and Supernatural. I had always been a geek and proud as hell of it. I had a doctor appointment in about fifteen minutes and I was very anxious. I felt my phone vibrate in the pocket of my jeans and I picked it out.
My phone was a gold iPhone 7 covered in a pink Mulan themed case. Disney was one of my favorite things ever and Mulan was my favorite, tied with The Little Mermaid and The Lion King. I got a text from Trish. It said,
"Hey girl, you good?"
She attached a selfie of her and her boyfriend, Jace Dillon, while he was kissing her cheek. She met Jace about a year and a half ago when the two of us were at the mall together and we were at Hot Topic and he asked her out because he thought she was hot. I texted,
"I'm nervous AF. I'm at the hospital for a test because I don't know what the hell I have."
"Hope your ultrasound goes well, princesa. PS Jace says hi."
Trish was latina and spoke very fluent spanish. She often integrated spanish into her english sentences. I texted her back and I said,
"Thank you. Me too."
I heard my doctor, Dr. Marianne Reynolds, say,
"Dawson, Allison Catalina?"
I started shaking and I drank more of my water. Dr. Reynolds held up a gown and she said,
"Here's the gown. Please undress except for your lingerie."
I undressed from my clothes- a white, black, pink, purple, and blue sweater with geometric aztec prints, black skinny jeans and pink uggs. After getting into the gown, Dr. Reynolds asked me,
"So what seems to be the problem?"
I said,
"I've been having a lot of symptoms- I have a lot of anxiety and crying spells without even knowing why, panic attacks, I've been losing weight, I get nauseous and I don't have much of an appetite, recently my mouth has had ulcers on it, I'm tired all the time, I have frequent headaches that come with head tremors, I have chest pain and it hurts to breathe, I have high fevers, I have sensitivity to being cold, I have to pee a lot and I have blood in my urine."
Dr. Reynolds picked up the little light, looking in my eyes and she said,
"I see you have this butterfly rash on your face."
"Yeah, I do."
She listened to my heart with the stethoscope and looked in my throat. She said,
"Yeah, I see the ulcers in your mouth. If there is blood in your urine, we should do a urine test."
She reached into the cupboard and pulled out a cup. I did feel the need to pee and I gently took the cup and went into the bathroom and sure enough, there was blood in my piss. It wasn't due to my period. I put the cap on the cup I had just pissed into and sealed it shut and washed my hands and left the bathroom. FUCK- I had a head rush, it came with a head tremor again and my head was aching and I had to stand outside the door, while using my hand that wasn't holding a cup of piss, and my dominant hand was holding the doorknob.
I walked back in and I said,
"I have the urine."
I handed her the cup and she said,
"Thank you. We also need to do a blood draw on you and we need to check your blood pressure and your temperature."
She wrapped the cuff around my arm and my blood pressure was one hundred and four over ninety-three. My temperature was ninety-eight point six.
"Temperature's normal. So we can do the blood test. You can change back into your clothes and then go straight down to lab."
I said,
"OK."
I changed back into my clothes and my mom went to the elevator. I held my mom's hand and nuzzled just below her shoulder.
"I hope I don't have it serious. It's wishful thinking, I know."
My mom kissed the top of my head and she said,
"I hope so, too. I want you to be OK and get the treatment you need."
As we went to the lab, a nurse gave me a bottle of Juicy Juice Apple Juice and a large chocolate chip cookie. Juicy Juice, I felt four years old again just hearing those words. I finished them both up in ten minutes and so they could do my blood test and so I wouldn't faint and I would replenish my blood sugar. When I got back home, I said,
"Hey, Mom, I'm going to go rest in my room."
My mom said,
"OK."
I grabbed my blanket and snuggled up with some of the stuffed animals I had. I had set my phone on my nightstand and I heard it ding and I picked it up. I saw I had a Facebook friend request from Austin Moon- the Austin Moon who I'd crushed hard on during freshman year. The Austin Moon who had stepped in when that asshole was catcalling me and touching my chest. The Austin Moon who consoled me when I had that panic attack.
Austin's profile picture was a picture of him and an adorable toddler with blonde hair, chubby cheeks and large brown eyes and the two were laying on a bed while he was kissing the toddler on the cheek. The toddler had a blue and orange pacifier in his mouth and he had a bunny rabbit at his side. I was very anxious to meet Austin's son because he was adorable. My profile picture was just me in red pajamas with white polka dots and black thick framed glasses. Later that day, I saw my doctor had emailed me the test results from the urine test and blood test- I had something called Systemic Lupus Erythematosus.
What the hell was Systemic Lupus Erythematosus? Wonderful- my anxiety started to act up again. I hit the home button on my phone and said,
"Siri, look up Systemic Lupus Erythematosus."
What I saw next made me feel like the rug had been pulled out from underneath me. Systemic Lupus Erythematosus, which was commonly known as Lupus, was an autoimmune disease where the body attacks healthy tissue in many parts of the body. It was a lot like cancer- a disease that was taking the lives of way too many people.
I put my phone down and cried myself to sleep. I couldn't believe I was terminally ill. Would I die? Would I live? So many questions were running through my head.
OMG Ally has Lupus! How will her parents and her friends react? Will she get the treatment she needs? Read to find out and if you like the story, don't be afraid to favorite, follow and review! Love my fans!
