GRAPHIC WARNING: These outtakes contain emotionally graphic material. Involves, but not limited to drug use, suicide, sex, violence, mature language, and emotional turmoil. Also there is a section that involves the death of a child, it does not go into detail and is not graphic.
Important Note: These time lines may not line up perfectly with things that I have said in my story line, but it is most accurate this way. Sorry I am not perfect and the math when writing didn't line up perfectly when I put it into words.
January 2004
I didn't make it home for the holidays, hell I didn't even call. I was drunk and depressed beyond reason. I had failed last semester and decided not to go back. All I did was lay around with Demetri and drink. (Dem and Jane came from rich families so they had access to all the money any of us needed.) I had moved on from beer to heavier stuff like whisky and vodka. I was at the point were I could drink it straight from the bottle without a care in the world.
I had learned not to piss Dem off so he wasn't hitting me so much, but I still had to please him sexually without being pleased myself. His pleasure was my pain. I had to fake an orgasm-which I had never had one so I had to watch a porn to figure out how to do- so that I wouldn't get knocked around. Apparently it was my fault he couldn't get me to finish.
May 2004
It was this month that things went horribly wrong. (Well wrong for our already terribly wrong relationship.) We were having a party at the house and I was off to the side drinking and minding my own business when some guy comes over and starts chatting me up. I immediately scan the room for Dem knowing that he wouldn't be happy about me talking to another guy and much to my bad luck he was watching. He narrowed his eyes at me and then came across the room quickly. He threw me over his shoulder and carried me off to our room.
There was an evil in his eyes, it terrified me more then the other nights. That night I said no and I fought against him, but it did no good. He forced himself into me and it was worse then any other night. I felt it all, even him as he finished inside of me. He left me naked, cloths ripped off and crying in the bed.
I laid there for an immeasurable amount of time before Jane came in with her goody bag, she sat down next to me and sat a mirror down. She then poured the white powder on it and handed me the small clear tube.
"Here this will make it all go away." She said and as I stared down into the glass my hair a mess, my eyes red from crying I did it. I snorted it down.
It was the scariest and most numbing feeling. I don't remember the rest of the night.
The next morning I hated myself for doing it and swore that I would never do it again. I hated the person I had become as I looked in the mirror of my bathroom. But I would do it again, not in the waking months, but later after my reason to live left the world.
June 2004
My period was only a day late, but I knew in my heart that I was indeed pregnant. I just knew it and I knew that Dem wouldn't be happy about it. I was terrified to tell him, as much as he had hurt me I couldn't let him hurt our baby. I had no one to turn to, when I called home no one answered. It had been months since I had been in touch and word about me dropping out had gotten back to them. My father had informed me that I was no longer the daughter he raised and not to bother calling him when I reached rock bottom. So it was no surprise that he didn't answer.
I called the one person I knew I could count on, Jake. He answered on the first ring and all I had to say was I need you and he was on the next flight out. I meet him at a restaurant too afraid to have him come to the house. Afraid of Demetri.
"Bella not to be rude or anything, but you look like shit." I hadn't had a drink since I realized I was pregnant, I was having a little bit of withdrawals.
"I feel like shit, hell I am shit." I said throwing my hands up. Demetri had taken everything from me, every piece of me. I was an empty shell with only a child to hold me together. A child conceived out of hate and jealousy, it had happened the night that Dem raped me, that I snorted coke.
"Bella don't say that. You are a little lost, but I can help you find yourself again. Come home with me, we will fix this all." He was so nice and I had ruined everything, I broke down crying.
I had to tell him everything or he wouldn't understand, but as soon as it was all out I realized it was a mistake. His eyes blazed with fire and I coward down used to being the blunt end of such anger, even thought I knew Jake wouldn't hurt me. I was used to being hurt so I knew nothing else. Jake grabbed my hand and looked deep into my eyes.
"Bella you are coming home with me and we are getting that monsters child out of you." He said quickly and I ripped my hand away from him and covered my baby, my stomach protectively.
"No Jake, I want my baby." I told him shaking my head. "It is all I have, it is part of me. The only part of me. Please Jake."
He stared at me for a moment confused, but finally sighed.
"Whatever you want, but that bastard isn't allowed in your lives." As soon as I realized I was pregnant I feel in love with my baby and with the love I realized that I didn't love Demetri. So I had no problem agreeing with Jake. We went back to the house I shared with Demetri, Jake escorted me into the house where only Jane was home.
"What is going on?" She asked looking Jake over.
"I am going home." Her eyes widened and she chuckled darkly.
"It is your funeral." Her words stopped me in my tracks and I knew it was true, Demetri would kill me. He wouldn't let me go, he saw me as his property.
"I am not going to let anyone hurt you, come on and get your stuff." Jake assured me and I quickly packed my things. As we were putting the last bag in the car Demetri and Felix flew into the driveway. They already knew what was going on which meant Jane called them.
"Get in the car and lock the doors." Jake said handing me the keys. I shook my head fearing what they would do to him. "Go now Bella, think of your baby."
I ran to the car like a mama bear. Jacob closed the trunk and I thought he would come and get in, but he didn't. He waited for Demetri to get to him and he started throwing punches. Demetri through a few back, there body sizes matching up. Felix watched and even threw a few cheap shots in here and there. I was starting to get really scared so I rolled down the window and yelled distracting them long enough for Jake to get up and get an advantage.
Jake jumped in the car and I could hear Demetri yelling after us as we speed away.
"Your mine Bella, I will see you soon."
July 2004
It took a month to get my parents to agree to let me come back home, with the news of a grandchild it was hard for them to put us both out on the streets. It was hard staying sober, but my family helped me through it. Jake stayed by my side everyday as promised.
October 2004
Jake, my mom, and dad all went with me to my five month appointment to learn the sex of the baby. At this point we were all getting excited about the new addition to the family and we had forgot about the deadbeat bastard who had provided the sperm.
"It's a boy." The tech announced and we all gushed with excitement. I had wanted a boy so bad, but I was hoping and praying that he would look nothing like his daddy. I didn't want to be reminded of the evils of my past forever.
December 2004
It was a week before Christmas and I still didn't have a name for my baby boy and I had been through the baby book six times. I had a list of names, but nothing seemed right. I figured that maybe on the day that he was born a name would just come to me.
One day I was heading outside to take my dad some lunch at the garage when I got the feeling that I was being watched. I glanced around the street and I spotted the black Cadillac. The car wasn't familiar to me, but the way that the hairs on the back of my neck stood up told me who it was. I stared like a deer in the head lights as he stepped out of the car and made his way towards me.
"You're fat." He chimed looking me over in my big winter cloths. I backed away from him worried for my babies safety.
"I'm pregnant." I hoped this would hold him off, maybe he wouldn't hurt me. He stopped in his tracks.
"Who's is it?" The anger was clear in his eyes and I wondered if the truth or a lie would be worse.
"Mine." I really didn't want to claim the baby as his, because it truly was mine. He narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips at me.
"Who is the father?" His dominance showing through and making me extremely nervous.
"Whose do you think?." Surly he wouldn't want to harm his own child. He stood there staring at me and a smile graced his lips.
"We're having a baby?" He sounded as if nothing had gone on between us, as if we were still together. 'I'm having a baby' I corrected in my head, but didn't dare say out loud. I just shrugged my shoulders.
"I bet it is a boy, I always wanted a boy. Someone to carry on the name." He sounded honestly excited and it eased some of my worry that he wouldn't hurt me. "Oh Bella baby I am sorry about everything. You have to come back to me, we have to be a family. Our son needs me."
I stood there staring at him a loss for words. Was he serious?
"I can't." I whispered scared of his reaction.
"Yes you can." He reached out and grabbed my arm nearly taking my feet out from under me. "We are having a baby and you are coming home with me."
"Let go you're hurting me." I cried out as he squeezed my arm tighter.
"Do as I say and I won't have to hurt you. Why don't you just listen to me Bella?" He started dragging me towards his car, I panicked.
"Ok I will go, but I need to get my stuff." I lied. I wasn't the best liar, but this was for my baby. He turned and stared me down for a moment.
"I will buy you new stuff." He finally said and continued on towards the car.
"I have meds I have to take, you can't buy more, my doctor prescribed them." I lied again, he turned looking into my eyes.
"Are you lying to me?"
"No." I said quickly. "Please let me go get them and then we can go be a family."
All lies. Much to my dismay, but not surprise he didn't let me go. Instead he ushered me into the house, my mother was in the kitchen cleaning up. She glanced over at us and raised an eyebrow in confusion. She had never seen Dem and had no idea what he looked like, but as her eyes narrowed in on his grip on my arm she knew.
"What is going on?" She asked drying her hands off and looking around nervously.
"Good news." Demetri smiled turning on the charm. "Bella and Demetri Junior are coming home with me, we are going to be a family. Isn't that right Bella." He tightened his grip on my arm, I nodded my head in agreement.
"Just got to grab a few things." I lied and my hand tapped the counter as she eyed us. She wasn't stupid she knew what was going on, but she was torn on what to do. She needed to be alone to phone my dad, but at the same time she didn't want me in my room alone with him. I made the choice for her. "Come on Dem I will show you my room."
He smiled down at me glad to see I was playing along, but what he didn't know was I was really playing along with my mom. Once we were in my room he pushed me up against the wall a little too roughly. Though I was grossed out ,it was good that he was taking more time, because that gave my father more time to make it here and save me. "I have missed you so much baby." He purred into my ear as he licked and nibbled at my neck. My stomach turned with disgust. His hands moved down to my belly and I tensed up. "Kick for daddy." He cooed to my belly and I wanted to kick alright. I wanted to kick him right in his sack, but I didn't. I faintly heard the crunch of tires outside and relaxed knowing my father was here. Demetri didn't hear it.
"I need to use the restroom before we go and my meds are in there."
He eyed me for a moment before he let me lead the way, once there he held out his hand to me.
"Cell phone." I sighed and handed my phone over, then I locked myself in the bathroom. I didn't want to be in the line of fire when my father closed in on Demetri.
"Where is she?" I heard my father yell into the hallway outside of the bathroom.
"In here dad." I called out to him.
"Stay there." He yelled back.
"Bella you need to come on baby, we should really be going." Dem called to me as if he could trick my father.
"She won't be going anywhere with you."
I heard a scuffle and I held my breath in fear. My father was fit and took martial arts back in the day, but Dem was double his size and half his age. There was a bang on the wall and a few grunts, then I heard the sirens and felt a bit relieved. There were some rushed voices and then after another moment I heard a soft knock on the door and my mothers voice.
"He's gone sweetie."
I opened the door and fell into her arms. I pressed charges against Demetri, got a
restraining order and he was court ordered back to New York for charges he was wanted for there.
