Chapter 3


Guan Ping: I've got something!

Director: What is it?

Guan Ping: Ok...


Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Coronation)

Zhao Yun as Aragorn

Zhou Yu as Legolas

Zhuge Liang as Gandalf

Sun Shang Xiang as Arwen

Xiahou Ba as Gimli

Ma Chao as Faramir

Wang Yi as Eowyn

Sun Jian as Elrond

Guan Xing, Zhang Bao, Ma Dai and Jiang Wei as Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin

Generics and Peasants as the Crowd


Director: This is the worst cast you just made.

Guan Ping: What? It's my first one!

Ma Chao: I don't think I should be in the same set as Wang Yi.

Wang Yi: I agree with him. Why us?

Guan Ping: I was going to go for Sun Quan and Lian Shi but, they're shopping right now.

Ma Chao: Well these outfits are dumb. And your decision is also dumb.

Xiahou Ba: Remind me again why I have a fake beard?

Director: Your character is a dwarf and you're kinda short. Screw talking! Let's get this over with!


(Zhuge Liang mounts the crown on Zhao Yun)

Zhuge Liang: Now come the days of the king.

(Zhao Yun faces the crowd. The crowd cheers.)

Zhao Yun: The day is not one by one man, but to all.

(He starts singing something I (the author) don't even understand. He walks down the carpet (or whatever). He meets Zhou Yu. He notices Sun Shang Xiang in a veil accompanied b Sun Jian.)

(Zhao Yun and SSX kiss as the crowd celebrates.)

(They walk through the crowd to find Guan Xing and co. bowing to them)

Zhao Yun: You bow to no one.

(Everyone bows towards Guan Xing and co.)


Ma Chao: I barely did anything there!

Wang Yi, Xiahou Ba and Sun Jian: Us too!

Director: Well that was well done by everyone regardless.