Chapter 3 – The letter
October 1975
Narcissa sat on her bed, propped up by some pillows and tried to study. She was going to have an important test in Defence against the dark arts in a few days and she needed to prepare herself. She knew that she ought to be stressed and nervous, but she just didn't know how to concentrate. How could she focus on some insignificant spells when her life had become a dream?
She knew she was behaving silly, in a way that was not at all like her. But she couldn't help it. What did she care about school? What did she care about the whole world? What did she care about anything except what had happened?
She glanced at her notebook and giggled. It should be the notes she had been supposed to write during the time she had spent in the library that afternoon. But all she had written was a single name, over and over again on the blank sheets.
Severus had become annoyed, she could tell. He was almost as good at the defence against the dark arts as he was at potions and he had done his best to help her. But when he noticed that she wasn't concentrating, he had finally given up. Muttering angrily that he didn't want to waste his time, he had resolutely left the library.
She knew that she should feel bad. He was her closest friend outside of the family after all and she should not have treated him like that. He had seemed to bee in a worse mood than usual ever since she told him. She had hoped he would have been happy for her, but he had not enjoyed the news at all.
"So they'll force you into their patterns after all," he had said sourly.
"No one is forcing me to anything," she had insisted. "This is what I want." She had looked sharply at him. "And you know it is."
"Yes, well," he had muttered. "Congratulations then."
Perhaps she had been naive to expect any joy from his side. She knew what he felt. But Severus, along with the rest of the world seemed to her like a great blur of grey at the moment. Her thoughts were only focused on a single thing; Him.
She had loved him for as long as she could remember. He had been her hero, the prince of her dreams. She just couldn't believe that he was going to be hers. It was the answer to a whole life of prayers, hopes and dreams. Whenever she closed her eyes, she could feel the warmth from his hand as he took hers, when they were joined forever.
"Not before you have left Hogwarts," her mother had said firmly. Education was important to a Black.
It was the only cloud on her blue heaven. It would be three years. It could just as well have been three hundred years. She just didn't know how she would be able to wait.
Andromeda didn't know what had woken her up. She sat up, blinking in incomprehension and disorientation for a moment, before she realized that she had been falling asleep on the sofa in the Slytherin common room. It had grown dark outside the windows and the fire in the hearth had almost died. She sat quietly, since she could have sworn she'd heard something, but everything was silent around her.
She slowly glanced around her, remembering that she had been studying for the class in potions she would take the following day. She had been stuck on some particularly difficult mixture and she had been thinking that she needed to beg Narcissa ask that slimy Severus Snape for help, as much as she disliked it.
She was about to haul herself off the couch and go to the girls' dormitory when another noise suddenly reached her ears. It sounded like someone was trying to sneak up on her. She whirled around and sucked in a sharp breath as she discovered a male form standing in the shadows by the door. Instinctively, she reached for her wand.
"Andromeda," the form said.
The relief felt like a wave inside her stomach. She exhaled deeply and dropped the wand. But as she watched him more closely and fully realized who it was, her relief was replaced with anger. She was angry for having shown fear and she was angry with him for coming.
"What are you doing here?" she demanded.
"I have a right to visit the members of my own kin, don't I?" Sirius discreetly disentangled himself from the shadows and stepped into the weak light. For once, his face was not lit up by one of his usual, goofy smiles.
"Very funny," said Andromeda wryly. "It must be something very important to make you break into the house you loath beyond everything else in the world. Should I assume you have come to seduce Bellatrix? I am sorry, but I think she is aiming for someone slightly more mature."
He rolled his eyes. "I would rather seduce Madam Pince, thank you very much."
She couldn't help laughing. "So what are you doing here? And how on earth did you get in?" Actually, she wasn't very surprised that he had managed to sneak inside the house of Slytherin. Rules had never prevented her cousin from doing what he wanted.
Sirius' voice was impatient when he answered. "That's not important. What's important is that I really need to talk to you."
"About what?"
"I've got a problem."
Andromeda nodded sarcastically. "Of course. Why else would you come to me? How many times do you expect me to save your hide, Sirius?"
"It's not like that!" he spat. "This is serious. And I doubt that anyone could save my bum in this case."
Andromeda blinked, surprised by his fierce tone of voice. She suddenly noticed that there was something haunted and grim over his features that she certainly wasn't used to see. "All right," she said in a gentler tone of voice. "Tell me what's happened."
Sirus sighed deeply as he settled down on the back of the couch. He pulled out a piece of parchment from inside his robes and unrolled it. "This is what's happened."
Andromeda frowned as she recognized the elegant hand. "You have got a letter from your mother."
He nodded. "I have. And I suppose each and every soul acquainted with the ancient and most noble house of Black have received one as well."
"What is it then?"
"Read and weep," said Sirius with disgust and placed the parchment in her hands. With a thoughtful frown on her face, Andromeda lowered her eyes over her aunt's exquisite sentences.
Dear friends and pureblood brothers and sisters of every degree!
It is with the greatest and most profound pleasure and pride that We, Walburga and Orion Black announce the betrothal between Our beloved son Sirius, heir to Grimmauld Place and Narcissa Black, youngest daughter of Lady Walburga's affectionate brother Cygnus and his honourable wife Druella, nee Rosier.
It is Our great hope that Our pure and true youths shall have a prosperous and most fruitful marriage and produce many new pureblood wizards and witches of the finest kind to the world that has become so gravely depraved.
Let us all raise our hands in a toast for this alliance and pray that they raise their children in accordance with the will of their pure fathers and make their hearts as pure and true as their own.
Toujours pur!
Andromeda allowed the letter to slip through her fingers and down to her lap. As she read the lines again, she had to fight her unfitting desire to giggle. She asked herself how many times the word pure had been used. She knew her aunt and uncle were eccentric, but this was too much.
"Do you find this amusing?" Sirius asked her coldly.
Andromeda bit her lip tightly and managed to choke her giggles. "I am sorry," she said earnestly. "But I don't see why you are so shocked. I would have thought you'd be expecting this. It is not as if they haven't suggested it before, is it?"
"No," said Sirius harshly. "I guess I hoped against all hope that they would at least have the grace to ask for my opinion before they had me married off."
"You haven't been married off. It's only a betrothal."
"Don't make yourself silly, Andromeda. You know as well as I that betrothals are as binding as marriages in our circles. If you break them, you break the family honour. Your father will curse the living daylight out of me if I back out."
That was hard to deny, Andromeda realized as she folded the parchment. Her father was protective of his daughters and she didn't dare to think about what he would do to someone who insulted their honour. Even if that someone was his own nephew. "What are you going to do?" she asked him quietly.
He raised his eyebrows. "I was hoping you would be able to tell me that."
"Well, the options aren't great. You can do it or you can run for it."
"Neither of those options tempt me."
Andromeda sighed as she handed the parchment back to him. "If I were you I would stay low. You have two years left at Hogwarts and Narcissa has three. A lot could happen in those years. They can't expect you to marry before you have graduated, can they?"
"No," Sirius agreed gloomily. "No, they can't. But as soon as I am out, they will push me into my new prison, the bloody 12 Grimmauld Place. They will expect me to take over as the bloody patriarch of this twisted family and start producing new little purebloods with the speed of a micro organism."
"Well, you are the heir to the house," Andromeda pointed out.
"I don't want it!" he snapped back, fiercely. "As far as I am concerned they can give it to Regulus, we all know how badly he craves the stinking place." Seeing the look on Andromeda's face, he stopped himself. He pulled a deep breath and ran his hands through his tousled dark hair. "It's not Narcissa you know," he told her sincerely. "There is nothing wrong with her. Well, apart from all the pure blooded issues and all that. I would much rather marry her than Bellatrix. It's just that..."
"You want to choose who you are going to marry," finished Andromeda softly.
"It's not fair to Cissy either," he said. "I hardly think she is any more enthusiastic about this than I am."
He was wrong in that respect, Andromeda was convinced of that. And anyone who had seen Narcissa gaze after him with her large blue eyes would agree with her. But of course he was a boy and boys were just so blind sometimes.
Sirius grimly shook his head. "I won't let them dictate my life. I refuse to be a puppy in their hands. If they try to control me, I'll break free."
Andromeda's eyes widened with fear as she realized what he meant. "Oh no, Sirius, don't do that," she said. "Where would you go?"
"There is always somewhere. I would manage."
She shook her head. "You don't have to." Anxiously, she tried to find a solution to the problem. "Can't you at least give it a chance?" she asked him. "You will never know what you might get if you throw it all away."
Sirius stared at her. "Would you let them do that do you?" he asked her quietly. "Would you let them take your dreams away and your future and everything that you care about?"
Andromeda pondered the question for a moment. "No," she finally said. "I want a life of my own. But I am sure I can get that and still keep my family."
Sirius laughed lightly. "Some day you might have to reconsider that, sweet cousin." He sighed and pulled a hand through his hair. "I'll think about what you have said."
Bellatrix was cursing angrily to herself as she tried to clean up inside the room she shared with her sisters. It seemed to be virtually impossible to keep order as long as you were living in the same space as Andromeda. Her bed was always so covered with books, papers, clothes and other stuff that she couldn't believe that she could even find her way to it at night.
Of course, none of the sisters were used to having to clean up after themselves. They had been surrounded by house-elves for all of their lives that were always too pleased to serve their master's daughters. At home, they would never even dream of picking up their own socks from the floor.
Suddenly, there was a sound from outside. The window was open and when Bellatrix looked up, she saw something moving on the window board. For a moment, she thought she was seeing things. It just couldn't be...
But then she realized that it was for real and suddenly, she found herself getting cold. She would know that bird from anywhere. But it had been so long that she had almost given up her hope. It was the elegant and shining, black and white owl called Rania that belonged to Lucius Malfoy.
Bellatrix fingers trembled slightly as she held out her arm. In a graceful movement, the bird landed at the top of her index finger. Quickly, she was able to snatch out the message that was hidden beneath Rania's wing. Her breathing was getting rapid as she opened the piece of parchment.
About two minutes later, she was running out of her room and up the stairs that led from the Slytherin house. She had not made it very far until she ran straight into her sisters. She had to dig her heels into the ground not to send them both crashing backwards.
"Oi, Bella, where's the fire?" Andromeda asked as she tried to stand steady.
Bellatrix ignored her. "It's happened," she hissed.
"What? Have you finally got an Excellent grade on some test?"
Bellatrix glared at her. Firmly, she shoved the piece of parchment into her face. "He sent me this."
"Do you mean he finally asked you?" Narcissa wondered in excitement. "I mean, really asked you?"
"Yes! I mean no... I mean yes, but..." Bellatrix stuttered and became furious with herself. Taking a deep breath, she told them: "He is coming to Hogsmeade next weekend. He is asking me to meet him there."
"Oh." Narcissa's face fell. "That is wonderful, isn't it?" she said, trying to sound encouraging.
Andromeda snorted and shook her head in disbelief. "Would mother and father really let you see him alone?"
"Well, I suppose I will have to take the two of you with me as chaperons," Bellatrix said sweetly. "But you shouldn't go there by yourselves either. I don't want to be distracted by my little sisters. You should both find someone to go with who can keep you diverted."
Andromeda frowned. "Who should that be?"
"Oh, I realize it will be hard for you, Andromeda, but I am sure there is some poor, blind fool you could drag along. And as for you, Narcissa..."
Bellatrix stopped as she heard steps behind her. They all turned around. Sirius was slowly walking up the stairs towards them. His face was looking strangely nervous and uncomfortable. "Hello girls," he said awkwardly.
"Speaking of fools," said Bellatrix coldly. "What can we do for you? Have you come to ask Andromeda to use her badge to save you from some teacher's wrath again? I don't know why she bothers."
"No," said Sirius. "Actually I have not come to see Andromeda." His eyes were hesitating as they slowly wandered to the youngest of the sisters who looked like she was holding her breath.
"Narcissa," he said slowly. "I was just thinking... We are allowed to go to Hogsmeade next weekend. Perhaps you would like to go there with me?"
