Her Mother was dead, the man responsible was apprehended, and the only thing Kate Beckett could do was feel sorry for herself. She wanted so desperately to be herself and say that she was being ridiculous. Everything she had done to make herself a strong successful woman was being wasted in this moment of self-pity. She wanted to care. Oh how badly did she want to care. Unfortunately, the cloud of nothingness was surrounding her, enveloping her. She had felt this way before. 12 years ago after the death of her Mother, Kate Beckett had fallen into an ocean of emptiness and it had taken years to climb out. She knew that if she let herself wallow for too long she would fall right back in, but she told herself that she was fine, that she could control herself this time.

The shades had been pulled down and the only light in her living room was the flicker of the television, and the lamp on her coffee table that was illustrating the portrait of her parents.

Although the TV had been on all day, she had spent most of the time just staring at the old photograph. Thinking of everything that had happened since that picture had been taken. Her Mothers death, her Fathers alcoholism, her cutting off from the world, the academy, the precinct, Castle.

She let out a sigh when she thought of the way he had looked at her when they had last seen each other.

Oh God, she thought has it actually been 4 days!

When she had left the precinct she had gone straight to her Mother's grave. She must have stood there for hours before she said something. She told her mom about solving the case, how she didn't quite understand why she didn't feel the relief that she had spent the last 12 years waiting for. She hadn't yet shed a tear, but standing by her Mother's headstone she let the emotion flow. Her Mother was dead. The men responsible were in prison, about to go to prison or dead. But her Mother was still dead. She knew that solving the case wouldn't bring her back, she really did know that, but something deep inside her thought that catching the murderers would make it better. But it didn't. Her Mother was the only person in the whole world she really wanted to tell, and she couldn't.

She didn't remember driving home from the cemetery.

She also didn't remember emailing the Captain and requesting some time off.

However she did remember texting Castle. She had thought long and hard about what she wanted to say. She knew that if she didn't he'd be barging down her door the second he found her not at work tomorrow, well today, by that time it was almost 2am.

Her message ended up being very simple.

"Taking some time off. Don't worry I'm fine. Please respect my space."

When she was sure the message had been sent she turned off her phone. She didn't feel like answering her phone any time soon.

With that she went to bed.

She woke up at about 8 the next morning but after closing all of the blinds in her room she got back into bed.

She only got up once more that day and it was when she knew that she absolutely could not wait to go to the bathroom any longer.

The next morning when she woke up she rolled over, intending to spend the rest of the day in her semi-conscious state when she noticed something sparkle on her dresser. It took her foggy brain about 20 seconds to register what it was but when she did she shot out of bed like a rocket.

It was her Father's watch.

Her Father.

How could she have been so selfish!

In her haste to crawl into her hole, she had completely forgotten to call her Father. She was out of bed within seconds reaching for her phone. When she turned it on it buzzed several times before settling down.

She had a text from Montgomery saying he'd see her Monday

A message from Josh, asking when she could come and pick up the last of her stuff from his apartment.

The last text was from Castle. Only one, she thought, hmm.

It was short and simple, but filled her heart more than her depressed-self thought possible.

It read, "Ok. Kate, please don't loose yourself. I'm here for you. Always."

Always. She breathed, her lip beginning to quiver. The first words she had spoken aloud in what seemed like ages.

Although her heart wanted to think about Castle, or call him, her brain shoved that notion aside. She had learned well over the past 12 years how to compartmentalize.

She found her Fathers name in her contact list and pressed call.

She cleared her throat and after 4 rings he answered.

"Kaitie!"

"Hey Dad" she replied with a calmer voice than she felt.

"What's wrong Hun" Damn. He had always been able to see right through her.

"Do you have some time? Want to get lunch?"

"I'll always have time for you. Our place? Noon?" Her heart caught at the word always but her brain pushed it right back down as she replied,

"See you there."

-Two chapters in a week! What is this! Lets hope it becomes a thing!

So a very short one, but that ending felt right.

Don't know if you caught it but Kate and Josh aren't together. Personally I hate him, and seeing as there won't be more of him this season (part spoiler part fangirl pleading) I decided they have already broken up. I would write it in but I have read SO many of them I assume you are as tired as I, and it's my story AND I HAVE ALL THE POWER.

hehehe.

Anywhosen. Lemmie know! Good? Bad? Pointless chapter? I wanna know!

Until Tomorrow

-KB

p.s. 3 EFFING DAYS.