I woke up groggy. Perhaps it will be a new year. New Edward.

Yeah. Right.

Glancing at my clock, I groaned. Too early. I need to stop consuming entire bottles of scotch on school nights. Not that it ever affected my academic performance, but fuck. Edward Cullen needs his beauty sleep, too.

Donning the dark grey slacks and blue-button down was always a chore; I tired of this boring uniform. I tightened my black tie and shrugged into my blazer; another school year begins. The last before college.

Taking the steps two at a time, I descended the stairs, wondering who was going to cook the morning breakfast that my "parents" insisted on; the good doctor was probably at some boring meeting for the board of directors at the hospital; my money was on New Mommy.

Indeed.

"Good morning, handsome," she said, giving me that sex smile that had snagged her a sugar daddy. She was wearing the fucking fiftieth permutation of a see-thru housecoat; it was edged with that froofy feathery shit that you only see on women in Frederick's catalogs and movies with gangsters and their bimbo girlfriends. Only this one probably cost hundreds of dollars.

"Mommy," I nodded, accepting her chaste kiss and plate of pancakes with a smirk. I didn't have time for her meaningful looks, so I shoveled the decent carbs down my throat before grabbing my messenger bag complete with brand new MacBook Pro and dashed out the door, slightly eager to drive my new Baby.

New school year, new car. The Cullen Way. Maybe I could christen the back seat with a nice, leisurely fuck before the day ended. Rosalie had texted to me that I was to stay dry for the duration of the bet. I would have to see if she was serious about that shit.

Or maybe I should save it for the Swan.

Without remembering the details, I knew I had dreamt of her last night. I could practically taste her in my mouth.

This was going to be a good day.

I pulled into the parking lot, glad to see that no one had taken my spot. It was always a pain in the ass to explain to new students that they couldn't park there. The five front spots had been "reserved" for me and my friends for years. You just don't fuck with the school royalty's parking.

I saw the shiny red convertible and Hulking Range Rover; Rose and Emmett were here already. No doubt adorning the halls with banners welcoming all students. Right. As if the new people were welcome. We'd let them in easily. Right.

Jasper's vintage GTO rumbled in next to me. I had to admit, that bastard had style. He was the only person in years to successfully step out of the uppity mold our parents and grandparents had created, and everyone admired him for it. Hell, I admired him for it. I wished I had the balls to be different sometimes.

"The fuck are you wearing on your head, you douche?" I growled. He had some sort of fedora on. It looked like something my grandfather would have worn.

"Fuck you, Cullen. This is going to get me into the heart and pants of some unsuspecting chick today," he answered, smugly adjusting the brim with a lick of his thumb. I hated that he was probably right.

As long as it wasn't Isabella Swan. That shit was mine.

Too bad I couldn't warn him. I knew Rosalie would cut me off if I mentioned the bet to anyone, and we couldn't have that, could we? I had an impending threesome that needed attending to.

We hopped up on the back of my Cadillac and waited as Alice drove up in her Denali. Ridiculous. Jasper jogged over to help her out; she was too little to hop down, and her hiked-up plaid skirt would have revealed her cute little ass if she did. Not that anyone would have minded, or seen anything that hadn't already been seen; but hell, she had to keep up appearances, right?

As did we all.

The three of us trudged on to class, a path clearing as we strolled across campus.

Now, I'm not saying that we had a Right Stuff moment when we parted through crowds. We were approachable. It's just that everyone knew not to approach us unless expressly invited to do so with a beckon, a curled finger, or a simple "get the fuck over here." The kids at this institution knew better than to fuck with Us. We were in charge here.

I saw Fag Newton trailing after the Swan. Dammit. I needed to get that shit free and clear from her attachment.

"Jasper," I murmured, lifting an eyebrow in Newton's direction. J knew what to do. He and Newton had had more than one tiff over the years; Jasper rather enjoyed pushing the guy around. His emphasis on "Michael Newton, the Third" back in grade school had pegged him as a target for the rest of his miserable existence in Forks. He may have belonged to one of the oldest families around here, but as far as social standing went, he was fuckall at the bottom of the pecking order. Fag.

Sometimes Jasper was subtle about taunting La Tapette. Too bad Mike was never good in French; it took him years to find out we had cleverly found a new way to call him "fag". Tapette once tweaked out at one of Emmett's parties, and we got him to draw all over himself with pink Sharpie. Was it too mean? Oh, well.

But subtlety was not on today's menu. I could smell it in the air. Jasper was feeling feisty, and it was making me skittish. Or maybe it was because flashes of my Bella sex dream were finally breaking through my scotch buzz.

"Fucking Jasper," Emmett muttered, coming up behind Alice and feeling her up the back of her skirt. She shrieked and turned, smacking him in the chest. Fore play. I needed some of that. I briefly contemplated nuzzling the just-emerged Rosalie in the neck, but she never stood for that shit. And there was no use in raising her ire before school even began; since we all had multiple classes together, it would make the day long if our illustrious Golden Girl was a flaming cunt to everyone because of my hard-on.

The unsuspecting Tapette had stopped and practically crashed into Bella. Fucker. I think he did it on purpose so he could press his body against her ass. A tactic he stole from me back in the seventh grade.

Jasper didn't waste any time. Before Bella could pull Tapette's boner out of her ass, J had sidled up and pulled his pants down. Around his ankles.

Tightie whities. Of course.

I wanted to keep a straight face. I did. But Bella turned around and eyed what was going on behind her. A mischievous smile lit up her already beautiful face. A ray of sunshine broke through the clouds like out of some fucking cheesy romance story, lighting her up like an angel and some shit. She had a spattering of freckles across the bridge of her nose and an "I need to be fucked" hint of hunger blazing in her eyes as she looked over at us. Over at me. Like she knew I was behind the pantsing.

How astute of her.

The first bell rang, and Jasper jogged back over to our group as we parted the student body to get to class. He had English first with me and Alice; Rose and Emmett stalked off to the most bullshit class of them all- Physics. The two of them had a not-so-friendly competition over who would win the Future Engineers of America scholarship that I was pretty sure would lead to some decent fuckin' in the end. Or in The End. Lucky fucker. Emmett's been hitting Rosalie Hale off and on for years; they hated to love each other. Or at least each other's fuck parts.

First period with Derb. Lovely. She was also the newspaper advisor; the only school activity besides soccer and making out under the bleachers that I participated in. Mostly because it kept Father happy. Now I could see how it would pay off since Mrs. Derb loved me and everything I did. I think she ignored my Lothario tendencies because I'm such a fucking brilliant writer. Now I can do whatever the fuck I want in class. Fucking excellent.

I took my usual middle row, back seat and Jasper and Alice seated themselves around me, as per protocol; Bella took a seat the row over and a few seats up in front of Jasper. Nice. We both had a decent view of her legs now. I watched as she loosened the tie of her uniform with a sigh and reached down into her grungy black backpack; she whipped out a small paperback, leaned back into her chair until her knees hit the seat in front of her, and started to read. She wasn't even paying attention to Derb, who was cheerfully explaining the syllabus and roster. Same old shit; different year.

What is she reading? I could see her sitting there all still, only moving to lick her finger and turn the page. Her hand came up to brush a lock of hair out of her face, and I finally got a look at the title. Tropic of Cancer. Fucking nice.

Derb was sitting now, waiting for the announcements to ring out. Moments of silence do me no good since I get fucking bored so very easily. I faced forward and started to hum. And had to suppress my grin.

I could see Jasper staring at me from the corner of my eye; he tossed his fedora at me. Picking it up and tossing it on my head at an angle over my eye, I leaned to the side and said, "whatsa matter, J? What've you got against the Foo Fighters?"

"Don't fucking say 'Foo Fighters' to me, E," he sneered. I looked over my shoulder at Alice, whose eyes had lit up like frickin' Christmas at the mention of the Foos, just as I had intended.

"Speaking of Foo Fighters and drummers I've fucked… Daddy just got me tickets to Incubus. He got ten, just in case. So start deciding who you're going to be fucking in six weeks, Edward. Never forget what happened when we went to that damned Steve Miller show and you brought… what was her name? Whatever…" And she kept on prattling happily away, getting that glow in her eyes. Alice sure did love musicians.

It's why Jasper took up the guitar so many years ago. Poor Confused Torch Carrier. The only thing he'll ever be chicken about is Alice. He felt he never stood a chance with her, so he just worshipped her silently and painfully. And I, being the fucking Prince that I am, kept my mouth shut about it. We never, ever spoke of it since he had drunkenly confessed the sad truth to me years ago. Plus, since he was such a cold prick to everyone on the outside and therefore my perfect friend, I felt that I owed it to him to keep quiet.

This didn't mean that I didn't make veiled references to it. Constantly.

I kept humming.

"Cullen. I will choke you," he murmured. So, I did what any good friend would do. I whipped out my phone and texted my girl over in the office.

play foo fighters best of you during announcements

I knew she would. She did everything I asked of her. Everything.

And a few minutes later, the announcements began and there the song was. Fucking wonderful. I tossed the hat back at Jasper. And knew that I'd pay for that later. Especially when Alice started drumming along with her index fingers on the desk top. Stifling a grin, I wondered how Whitlock would get me back. I almost looked forward to it. He had the most devious mind since… well, Edward Cullen.

Forty minutes of watching Bella blatantly read her filthy book passed by. Derb kept calling on her, asking for her opinion on some of the books on the reading list, and every time, Bella would answer the interrogations, and it seemed like she was always correct as the teacher got increasingly annoyed by her answers. Especially when she answered the Moliere question in flawless French.

It was like she took a page out of the Cullen playbook. Hot.

The bell rang, startling Bella from her smut. She dropped the Miller and I saw Jasper plop his hat on his head and give me a huge grin. Oh, shit. He had noticed my ogling. Time for payback.

He rushed over and picked up her book before she even had time to react; straightening up, he held out his hand to her, helping her up and out of her desk. She was so petite; she barely came up to his chest, which means she'd be the perfect height for me to lift up and carry around when we were fucking. Nice.

Jasper smoothly reached down and picked up her backpack, smiling and carrying on and flirting shamelessly. He certainly is a charming motherfucker; it was that Southern nanny he had as a kid; she taught him to always act the gentleman; it's how he rivaled me for the amount of tail he got on a weekly basis. I relied on my killer wit; he relied on his charm. We made quite the pair.

He was standing very close to her now, and he leaned down to whisper shamelessly in her ear; she giggled and blushed a bit, and I wanted to punch him in the throat. He held out her backpack and she turned around, slipping her arms in the straps. Jasper then lifted his head and made direct eye contact with me since I hadn't moved- I was too annoyed and absorbed by him stepping in on my shit on purpose. He lifted one corner of his mouth and then mouthed over her head, "Foo Fighters, bitch."

Dick. Touche. That was a good one.

Alice pulled me out of the red haze that had settled over my eyes with a tug on my sleeve and a questioning twinkle in her eye.

"Everything okay, gorgeous?" she asked. I smirked at her and put my arms around her shoulders. She closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath as we made our way out the door; Jasper was holding it open for Bella and as Alice and I sailed through, I held my fist out for him to hit.

"Nice one."

"I know."

"Don't do it again."

"Or what? I do believe you owe me for getting to Kate first."

I sighed. He was right.

But I wanted in first. Needed in first.

Because of the bet.

He patted me on the back as we walked out, his eyes glazing over briefly as Alice brushed up against him.

Karma, dick.

The four of us walked down the hall, and I could feel the whispering of the student body as they all noticed that the New Girl was walking with us. A feat that not many had ever accomplished, and she wasn't even aware of it.

Alice and Bella had some art class together next, so Jasper and I trudged off to Physics, a silence settling between us as we were absorbed in our thoughts. And I'm sure we were both thinking the same thing. What are we going to do tonight, Edward? Same thing we do every night, Jasper. Try to take over the girls.

Lunchtime hit, and I was both elated and irritated that Alice had dragged Bella along to sit with us. We had calculus together, all six of us, and Alice had whispered to me that Bella already had college credit in it from her last school; Jesus. Maybe I had some competition. I thought chicks weren't supposed to be very good in math.

Rosalie primly sat next to me, sidling up so that our thighs were touching. Alice did the same on my other side, and the boy-girl-boy ratio was preserved across from us as Jasper and Emmett flanked Bella, who was sitting across from me. It was odd how we felt balanced now; but did I want my next conquest to be our sixth? I don't think so. It would take too long for her to get over it. And I didn't want to throw the group dynamic off. Then again… things might be temporarily weird after I fuck Rosalie and Alice. We'll see.

Rose was using her simpering Junior League voice to question Bella about how she found Forks. It was odd; these two spoke to each other through clenched teeth; maybe they had had some sort of run-in at the party last night or something. I didn't doubt it; I could already tell Bella was a firebrand, and God knows Rosalie Hale is a bitch to everyone and everything, much less to the competition for my affection.

No one was really eating as we were all raptly paying attention to the strained conversation between the two most gorgeous girls in the school. As was half the student body. I wasn't even listening, just watching each set of lips as they tossed out vaguely veiled insults at each other.

Just as it was going to get seriously nasty (which I was silently cheering for), Jasper elbowed Bella and handed her his flask. That broke her verbal sparring stride, which I'm sure was his intention. He got bored as easily as I did.

She eyed the ugly thing and chuckled. "Coleman, huh? Is there even a Wal-Mart in Forks?"

"Target. I wouldn't be caught dead in Wal-Mart."

"Ooh, I love the Target. They have the best fucking trail mix I've ever tasted."

"They do. And kudos to you for admitting you shop at Target."

"Of course she shops there, Jas," Rose interjected. "She's nouveau riche, remember?"

"You bet your sweet ass I am," Bella said, saluting Rose with the flask and poising it to her mouth. She tilted her neck back and in one breath emptied the thing. That's fucking impressive. Bombay is a strong damned gin.

Jasper's eyes glazed over a bit, and I swear, if he fucks with her I'll… well, I'll be pissed, that's for damned sure. Using the same hand she was holding the Coleman with, she swiped at her mouth with the back of her hand, capped the flask, and tossed it over to Jasper. He grinned appreciatively while eyeing her up and down; he leaned to her ear and said, "Now you owe me a drink."

"So let's do something tonight, then. No, wait. I promised the Chief I'd hang out with him since I partied with you people last night. Michael said something about my needing to be there, although I can't figure out why. You uppity assholes need to remove your wads of cash out of your asses."

And with that, she slipped out from in between J and Emmett, pulled on her backpack, and waltzed off, but not before looking over her shoulder and winking at me.

Wow. What a bitch.

I love it.