Well, this chapter is full of surprises.

Thank you all for reading and reviewing (even the guests)! And I hope this chapter makes you think! :D

Enjoy!


~:~ Chapter 3: Lies ~:~

After Thorin left for work, Bilbo laid down on his bed and waited for Thorin's ex-girlfriend-ish to show up. Don't get him wrong, he wasn't that all prepared to see anyone at this point in time, and he was totally freaking out about meeting her without Thorin. He knew the older man didn't tell her of him, and Bilbo was in no condition to potentially fight with a raging ball of estrogen. Nope, Bilbo was not in any mood to do so. Twice, he had almost got up the courage to call Thorin and beg him to call her and give her a heads up that he was here, but then he knew he'd be interrupting a most likely important meeting and he preferred to stay on Thorin's good side (if he has a good side, because Bilbo hasn't found it yet). Sighing loudly and going against his own conscience, Bilbo reached for his phone and dialed Thorin's number. On the third ring, the man picked up.

"Hello?" came the deep and rough voice of Thorin.

Bilbo sighed again. "Thorin, uh, it's Bilbo," he stuttered, licking his lips as he quickly thought of what to say and how to say it.

"Yes," Thorin said, sounding oddly patient. "What is it?"

"Um... I don't mean to interrupt your work or... um... bug you or anything... but... um..." Bilbo stammered. "W-well, c-could you c-call your girlfriend and tell her I'm here...?"

Thorin made a noise on the other line. "What?" he asked. "I have already told her of the accident. What is it you want me to do?"

"Call her and tell her I'm going to be staying here for six months," Bilbo said, huffing to himself. "Like you should have done a week ago when your brilliant fat mouth said so."

"So much for trying to be nice, huh?" Thorin grunted and glanced at his watch. "Listen, I have to go so can you just make the smallest effort to be nice to her?"

Bilbo grumbled. "Fine." He huffed again before adding, "Is she nice?"

"Yes..." Thorin said. "Now I have to go."

Before Bilbo could get another word out, Thorin hung up. "Stupid man," he grumbled, setting the phone down. "Now, all I have to do is wait..." he muttered to himself before deciding he might have enough time to try and take a shower/bath.


Successfully getting in, out, dressed, and settled into the wheelchair, Bilbo sighed contently as his first experience taking a shower/bath as an invalid was not so bad as he had thought it would be. He wheeled himself out of the bathroom and into the kitchen where he decided he'd look for something edible to eat since Thorin didn't bother telling him where everything was. Wait, Bilbo, that was your fault. Grumbling to himself about that, Bilbo made it as far as opening a cupboard when the front door opened.

"Shit!" he cursed, hurriedly closing the door with a loud thud as he heard footsteps down the hall.

At the sound, the footsteps stopped and a woman's voice came to Bilbo's ears. "Thorin?" it asked. "Is that you?"

"Oh boy," Bilbo squeaked quietly. "M-maybe she won't come this far."

Too late, she walked into the room and spotted Bilbo and he saw her. She was a lovely woman with long chestnut hair and beautiful hazel eyes that at this point were filled with question and anger. "Who are you?" she demanded, her heels clicking on the tile floor as she pointed a long pale finger at Bilbo whose eyes were wide. "What are you doing?"

"I-"

"Get out of this house!" she ordered, stepping forward before stopping short when she spotted the wheelchair. "Pretending, aren't you?" she sneered, grabbing a pan from the drawer and pointing it at Bilbo who had no choice but to run away... in the wheelchair... which wasn't very fast. "Come back here!" she shouted after him as he wheeled down the hallway.

"Jesus Christ!" he squeaked, sharply turning into the guest room. "Holy crap!" He wheeled himself behind the protection of the bed and made himself small in the corner of the room. She was close behind him and he whimpered as she appeared in the doorway. "P-please... I... Don't hurt me."

"Why are you in this house?" she demanded forcefully, stepping in front of Bilbo and blocking his way out. "Who gave you permission to enter this house?!"

Bilbo shrunk down in his seat and cautiously looked up at her. "Th-Thorin did, ma'am," he said quietly, shielding his face with his hands. "H-he said I am to st-stay here..."

The woman lowered the pan and eyed Bilbo suspiciously. "For how long?" she asked.

"Oh, uh, well... h-he didn't s-say exactly..." he lied. "I... don't know really... uh... I'm the man from the accident..." he said, knowing that at least Thorin told her that part.

"Ohh," she said, nodding and stepping back. "I'm sorry," she apologized, rounding the bed and standing a good distance away from him. "I didn't mean to frighten you; I just thought you were a burglar." (no actual pun intended, honestly). She smiled at Bilbo, encouraging him to come out of his hiding spot. "Sorry, I didn't know Thorin had taken you in. After all, he saw the accident happen, and I figure it was the least he could do for a young man whose life was nearly taken from him by an awful driver."

"Yes- what?" Bilbo asked, unsure if he had heard right. "Did you say that Thorin saw the accident?"

She smiled and nodded. "Yes," she said. "He told me of it right after it happened. Such a shame to see someone's life on hold all because a stupid driver failed to see someone in a crosswalk."

Bilbo let out a nervous laugh. "Oh, yes, um... well... Thorin..." he stammered before shaking his head at that man's lies. "He was kind enough to let me stay here," Bilbo said through clenched teeth and a fake smile on his face.

"I know," she said. "He's so caring, isn't he?"

"W-well, I am a guy, and I am not sure my opinion matters," he said awkwardly.

"Oh hush," she replied. "I am a woman, and I love complimenting on other women, if you know what I mean." She winked at Bilbo who swallowed nervously. "Well, I'm sorry. My name is Randi. What's yours?"

"B-Bilbo," he answered. "I... I am sorry to interrupt this conversation, but I haven't had anything to eat yet and I was in the middle of finding something when you started chasing me."

She laughed. "Of course, come on." She motioned him forward and left the room. "So, did you know the driver of the car on the day of the accident?" she asked, entering the kitchen and opening the cupboards as Bilbo followed her. "From what Thorin told me, the guy sounded pretty mean."

Bilbo nodded suspiciously. "And what exactly did Thorin say?"

"Well, he told me the guy was trying to get out of the charges. And he said he wanted you to press charges against him, but your friend told you not to... Yes, I think that's what he said." She sighed happily. "He's such a sweetheart, isn't he?"

"Adorable," Bilbo grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Anyone could get along with him," she said with a love-struck expression on her face. "He's so sincere."

"Anyone," Bilbo repeatedly angrily under his breath. "God help that person who can't stand him."

"Oh, you're talking about the guy in the accident, aren't you?" she asked, biting her lower lip. "Yes, I know. My poor dear has a lot of enemies, but I am so glad he is truthful to me; it's one of the reasons I got back together with him."

Bilbo nodded. "Uh huh."

"I have major trust issues, and he's always so protective and it was usually for the dumbest things but now, seeing how he has taken you in," she sighed again. "I just see him as a wonderful, wonderful man. He really has changed, you know."

"Really?" Bilbo asked flatly, not in any mood to hear how 'perfect' this sleazy piece of shit has become. "Well, as much as I would love to hear that story, I have to call my boss," he said as politely as he could. "Excuse me."

"Your boss?" she asked. "You work?"

Bilbo rolled his eyes after he turned away from her. "Well I did before some idiot hit me," he said. "My boss is aware that I had surgery, but he is not aware that I am confined to a wheelchair for six... for a while," Bilbo corrected himself. He smiled at her and reached for the phone on the counter. "I'll just-"

"Oh, no," Randi said. "I'll be in another room." She gave Bilbo a small smile and left the kitchen. Glancing behind her to make sure Bilbo wasn't following her, she walked into Thorin's room. "Perfect," she whispered to herself. "Just what can I accuse you of doing now?" she said menacingly before opening Thorin's drawers and searching for something to use against him... again.


"No, boss," Bilbo argued politely. "Please, it was only a small accident."

"Small accident?" the angry voice said on the other side. "For how long did you say?"

"Six months," Bilbo answered, cringing as he waiting for yelling.

There was a scoff on the other line. "Well, until you learn that six months is not a small accident, you're fired."

"But-" Bilbo said before the line went dead. "No..." he whimpered, putting the phone back on the receiver. "This cannot be happening. Thorin is so dead."

Huffing and grumbling, Bilbo grabbed an apple and wheeled himself down the hallway towards his room. He stopped short when he noticed Thorin's door open. Curiously, he slowly and quietly stopped in the doorway only to see Randi holding a small expensive looking object. Keeping quiet, Bilbo strained his ears to hear what she was saying.

"So, let's have you be woman number eight-one," she said, turning over the piece in her hand. "And... Thorin met you at the bar... after work. Yes, that's real perfect." Randi stood up and Bilbo backed up, and when she didn't come to the door, he went forward again.

"Holy shit!" he cursed under his breath as he watched her put on the necklace.

"There," she said, touching the stone against her throat. "To add to my collection, but don't worry I will have more if that thing and I stay together."

Bilbo's jaw dropped and he slowly backed into his room and shut the door quietly. "What the fuck did I just see?" he asked himself. "Randi... Thorin... love... necklace... no... something's not right." He jumped in his chair when there was a knock on the door. "Y-yes?" he asked shakily, opening the door.

"Hi," Randi said. "I'm leaving now, so can you tell Thorin to call me when he returns?" she asked kindly.

"Y-yeah... s-sure..." Bilbo said. "I... it was nice meeting you, Randi."

"Same here," she replied. "And I am still so sorry about my misunderstanding."

Bilbo shook his head. "No, it's fine."

Randi smiled and nodded. "Okay, bye!" she said cheerfully.

"Bye..." Bilbo said confusedly.


Four hours after Randi left, Thorin returned from work.

"So?" Thorin asked, setting down his briefcase on the counter. "How did it go?" He glanced at Bilbo who was in his wheelchair and sitting in the middle of the living room with his arms folded and a scowl on his face.

"Why didn't you tell her that I was staying here?" he asked quietly, looking at Thorin. "She practically knocked me over the head with a pan because she thought that I was some idiot trying to rob this house." He faced Thorin who had sat down on a chair near him. "You know, it's not easy to run from someone who is trying to lynch you when you can't really run!" he huffed, glaring at Thorin. "Now, if you had gotten the decency to tell her in advance, I do not think we would have this problem."

Thorin nodded slowly. "I see," he began, staring down at the drink he held in his hand. "And how did you get out of that situation?"

"Well," Bilbo said in a sigh. "That brings us back to the problem of you not telling her of the accident."

Thorin frowned. "What are you talking about? I did tell her of the accident."

Bilbo huffed. "No, you did not! I told her that I was in the accident, and she said that you had been a witness."

"I did witness it," Thorin argued.

"No," Bilbo reprimanded. "There is a clear difference between witnessing and committing. You committed a crime! You hit me with your car! You did not witness it!" He exhaled harshly through his nose. "Along with that, she thinks that you are a complete sweetheart." Bilbo nearly gagged at the last word. "Do you lie to her?"

Thorin growled. "She told you of her trust issues, didn't she?" he asked, sitting straighter in his chair. "Well, I am as truthful as they come. Maybe Bofur told you that much."

Bilbo narrowed his eyes. "And I told her that I would be staying here for a while," he said.

"Did you mention how long exactly?" Thorin asked.

"No," he replied. "Because I knew I'd be somebody's prey if I did that. And I like my life... well I did before... thank you very much! Oh, speaking of which is ruined by the likes of you," Bilbo snarled, wheeling himself closer to Thorin.

"How did I ruin your life?" he asked then regretted those words. "That's not what I-"

"How did you ruin my life?" Bilbo repeated sarcastically. "Oh, well let's see. You fractured my pelvic bone, you dislocated my hip bone, and you confined me to a wheelchair! Do you understand what that does for someone?" He glared at Thorin menacingly. "Oh that's right. You don't. You don't know what it's like to actually work for your life."

"What?" Thorin asked, trying to compose himself. "I do not appreciate you speaking to me in that tone."

"Too bad," Bilbo said. "You should have thought about that before you did the 'right thing' and offered to let me stay here."

"See, it was an offer," Thorin repeated. "You don't have to stay here."

Bilbo didn't answer and turned his head away from Thorin.

"Right," Thorin said triumphantly. "Because you have nowhere to go. Just admit it. I am the only person who will actually give-"

"I LOST MY JOB BECAUSE OF YOU!" Bilbo shouted, pointing his finger at Thorin. "I've had that job for ten years, and you got me fired!"

Thorin was speechless, both at what he had done and how angry he was becoming. "Listen, I didn't want to hit you with my car."

"But now I might as well be paralyzed for six months because of you," Bilbo huffed angrily. "This is all your fault! Don't try to reason with me!" With that, he turned his wheelchair and made sure that when he rolled by, he ran over Thorin's toes.

The other man snarled in pain. "Just where do you think you are going?" he gritted, getting up and reaching for the chair. "I am not through with you."

"You don't have to be," Bilbo said. "I... let me go!"

"Why?" Thorin growled, spinning the wheelchair around. "Am I bothering you?"

"Shut up!" Bilbo ground out. "I don't want to live with you as much as you don't want me here, but thanks to you, we have no choice."

"Wow," Thorin said sarcastically. "That's a lot coming from a person with the word 'bag' is his name."

"Oh!" Bilbo scowled. "You're only upset because I found out about your lies and I'm telling you off and the money you have to pay and, how could I forget, your girlfriend stealing your things and framing you for something!"

Smack!

Bilbo felt hot tears form in his eyes after the hard blow to his cheek by the back of Thorin's hand. He looked up into the older man's eyes and saw furious anger; he gulped in fear. "Thorin-"

"How dare you lie about her!" Thorin growled lowly, grasping Bilbo's shoulders tightly. "Randi is very dear to me. I trust her with all my heart. How dare you waltz in here and tell me these lies."

"They're not lies," Bilbo bravely argued. "I saw her!"

Thorin raised his hand to rub his own chin and Bilbo flinched. "Never speak to me of that filthy money again. Do you understand me?"

Bilbo glared at the other man before nodding slowly. "Thorin, about Randi, I saw-"

"I don't want to hear it," he interrupted. "Just get out of here."

Bilbo muttered something about the indecency to know the truth, ignorant fucker, under his breath. "I hate you," he said loudly before rolling himself out the back door.

"I hate you too!" Thorin growled, picking up his car keys and leaving the house. "Fucktard," he muttered, slamming the front door behind him.


Wow, I'm really evil... this could work ;)