Here's chapter 3, enjoy…

Disclaimer: CSI: NY and the character do not belong to me…


Mac

I still haven't said that word to her yet.

Sorry.

At the time I felt let down by her actions. I even felt angry with her. But as she turned in her badge and walked out the door, I could see it. I'd always seen it, but that was the first time it really hit me.

How great she was as a CSI.

Danny was my protégé. Aiden was…just hired. Stella mainly pushed for her, saying that she had potential, but I never listened.

Looking back on it – the night I fired her, I wish it didn't turn out that way. I wish I could've kept my team together forever.

Now there's Lindsey. I got a tip off from a friend in Montana that she was talented. I made a call and there she was. Ready and eager to work.

She had no idea that she was taking on a job once occupied by the Aiden Burn. She found out, though. After a couple of days. Stella lost her temper and snapped at her…

"It's so strange without Aiden." Stella said. All I did was nod in agreement.

We were all in the break room.

"Who's Aiden?" Lindsey asked with a small laugh which I don't think she meant to come out.

Danny raised his head angrily. He had hurt in his eyes. I know. I've felt it.

"She used to work here…" Stella said quietly.

Lindsey nodded slowly, stirring her coffee.

"Oh, that…person I replaced." Lindsey murmured.

The room went silent. Danny looked set to explode, but Hawkes held him back. Stella looked at me and I could see it in her eyes. Hatred. Well, hatred may be a strong word for it, but she looked angry. I could see where it was going…

Bonasera was going to lose it.

It wouldn't be the first time she's been unreasonable or violent. And me of all people knew that she went over the top when she let out her anger. Many of her 'episodes' have ended with people filing complaints against her.

I watched and waited for it, the moment she'd snap. I sighed inwardly. I really didn't need the extra paperwork or hassle from Gerrard.

"Look, just because you're the 'new girl', that doesn't mean that you can think you're any better than Aiden, because you're not and you'll never be!"

Stella didn't just shout it; she screamed it before stalking out of the room. Danny looked as if justice had been served and exited after her with Hawkes.

Lindsey stood, rooted to the spot. In shock. I sympathised with her slightly. I'd been on the end of Stella's anger before. I looked down at my cup. The silence was suffocating.

Lindsey finally looked up at me. I could see her eyes brimming with tears. Part of me wanted to apologize. She was new and hadn't settled in yet, and before she knew it, Stella had verbally slapped her across the face. It wasn't fair. That same part of me wanted to drag Stella into my office and give her a verbal slapping of my own.

But there was that other part of me, the part that wouldn't drag Stella anywhere, because I knew Lindsey had been insensitive, and Stella was just protecting Aiden. That was the part of me who definitely didn't want to apologize to Lindsey for Stella because it was my fault. If I had paid more attention to Aiden's case, if I hadn't been so absorbed in all the damn rules and regulations I've created, maybe Aiden would still be here.

Then no one would be hurting. Danny would still be laughing and joking, Stella wouldn't be so angry and I would be able to live with myself.

Aiden was wrong, but I feel guilty for firing her because she was my friend.

As Lindsey walked out quickly I could see the crack in my team forming.

I could talk to Stella later, maybe she'd listen, maybe not, but there is no way of forcing people to become friends. I know that.

Standing alone, watching the team, there's a lack of something. Unity.

Is it because we're one woman down?

I still haven't told her.

"Sorry"

I'll call her sometime. It's the least she deserves from me.


I just wants to say THANK YOU so so much to people who reviewed! You were so kind :) Glad you liked!