Monday morning, Reid entered the bullpen to see that he was the first one in. With the exception of Hotch, who was called to an emergency meeting. The young agent took his time rearranging items on his desk and getting himself a cup of coffee, waiting for the rest of the team to arrive.

His heart-to-heart with Hotch had left him a it shaken up, as if he had treaded into dangerous territory. Surely Hotch wouldn't find out just from what he had told him? Reid groaned when he realized that he had written "Aaron Hotchner" on a post-it. He furiously crossed the name out and crumpled the small piece of paper before shoving it deep into the bin.

This was really getting out of control. He had been reduced to writing the name of his crush like some lovesick teenager, something he didn't think he'd ever do in his lifetime. He stuck his tongue out in mild disgust at himself and returned to his coffee.

"Hey, kid. You have a good weekend?" Morgan asked in his usual good-natured voice as he entered the bullpen. He slapped the younger man on the back before situating himself by his desk.

"I guess you could say that," Reid answered, trying to hide his smile behind the coffee cup.

"Oh, hold up now. A good weekend? Let me guess, a hot date?" Morgan asked with a playful grin, swinging in his chair.

"Nothing like that."

"OK, read a book you liked?"

"No."

"I'm out of options."

"What are you guys talking about?"

The two men turned to the voice of Emily Prentiss, who was standing over them with a curious expression.

"Dr. Spencer Reid here had a good weekend, and I'm trying to figure out what he did."

"Hot date?"

"That was my first guess."

"Good book?"

"That was my second guess."

"I'm out of ideas."

"Wow, seriously, you guys?" Reid asked, feeling slightly offended that it was either a hot date or a book for him. He knew he wasn't the most sociable of the bunch, but still.

"Reid, you left this at the house." All three field agents jumped and turned to the new voice. Hotch was standing with a book in his hand, his characteristic frown on his face.

"Oh, thanks." Reid took it, hoping his face wasn't betraying his embarrassment. Hotch walked back into the office afterwards, leaving Morgan and Prentiss blinking in surprise.

"So...your idea of a good weekend was going to Hotch's place?" Morgan asked incredulously, not understanding how it could be any fun. He knew Hotch, and while he admired the unit chief, he was not the person he turned to for fun and games.

"Wow, Reid, you need to get out more," Emily added, making Morgan chuckle lowly.

"I was watching over Jack!" Reid hissed indignantly, feeling a brush creeping onto his face.

"OK, I guess that makes a bit more sense. So what did you guys do?" The older male agent asked.

"Hey guys, sorry to do this first thing on a Monday morning, but we have a case," JJ announced as she walked into the bullpen, interrupting the three of them. Reid sighed in relief, glad that he was no longer the center of attention.

0

Despite Reid's best efforts to keep a certain distance from his boss, Jack had persuaded his father to bring Reid back home the next weekend. And it sadly, it didn't take much on Hotch's part to persuade the young doctor.

So when Saturday rolled around, Reid found himself sitting next to Jack in the living room, engaged in strangely unnerving yet sweet conversation.

"Uncle Spence," Jack began, his voice barely above a whisper. "Did you tell her yet?"

"Tell who what?" Reid asked confused. Jack stretched his head out to make sure his dad wasn't listening. He had promised Uncle Spence to keep it a secret, so he was going honor it. His dad had taught him the importance of keeping promises.

"The girl you like, Uncle Spence. Did you give her flowers yet?"

"Oh," Reid mouthed, shocked that Jack was following up on their conversation from last week. Who would've thought that Hotch's son would be interested in other people's love affairs? "No, not yet."

"Did you tell her you like her?"

"No. And I don' think I will," Reid admitted with a heavy sign.

"What are you two up to now?" Hotch entered the living room with a gentle smile on his face. Jack shook his head with a defiant, "It's a secret, daddy," and turned to the young doctor with a wide grin.

Hotch slid next to his son, putting Jack between him and Reid.

"Reid, you'd make a great father," Hotch commented, making the younger man blink in confusion.

"Statistically speaking, I wouldn't be," Reid answered with a frown. A dismal father-to-son relationship and being at risk for Alzheimer's was not a good combination. To make things worse, he wasn't good with people, and when it came to romantic encounters, his current record including a short-lived fling with an actress and being hopelessly in love with his boss.

"Reid, trust me on this. You'd make a wonderful father," Hotch tried to reassure the other agent. The unit chief knew about Reid's insecurities when it came to relationships at any level. But he knew there was so much good in him. He had a brilliant mind and a kind heart, two things which were sure to make him a great father to a very lucky child. He could tell just by how well he interacted with his own son.

When the pizza arrived, the three sat in front of the TV, idly watching some cartoon as they enjoyed their dinner. Jack made it his mission to teach Reid about all the characters, which the genius obviously memorized very quickly.

After dinner, Hotch disposed of the pizza box and made his way back to the living room to see that Reid and Jack had gotten off the couch and were standing in front of the TV. The unit chief placed a hand over his mouth to stifle a laughter, as he watched Jack barking orders at Reid as the two danced to some tune playing on the TV.

Hotch was familiar with the dance routine. It was on the same cartoon show they were watching, and Jack had always danced along to it. The problem was Reid. Everyone on the team knew that he was probably the worst dancer in the bureau, but here he was, flailing his long and thin arms and legs about, missing beats and fumbling horribly. Jack's encouragements and commands were not helping the poor agent one bit.

The unit chief couldn't take it anymore. Reid's dancing was so ridiculous, the hand over his mouth could no longer stop him from laughing out loud. Reid jumped at the unfamiliar noise and blushed furiously once he spotted his unit chief. He groaned in horror, wanting to hide but not knowing where to go. He knew how he looked when he danced. It was why he never did it in public.

"I'm glad I amuse you, Hotch..." Reid muttered bitterly as he shoved his hands into his pockets. But deep inside, he was pleasantly surprised to see the older man laugh. He couldn't remember Hotch laughing out loud during the many years they spent working in the same team.

"I was teaching Uncle Spence to dance, daddy!"

"Good job, buddy," Hotch inhaled and exhaled deeply, trying to control his laughter. It had been so long since he had laughed like that, and it felt good. Really good. "Reid, I never knew you were so talented," the unit chief joked, entering the living room.

The young doctor blinked. Hotch actually made a joke? Reid played along and rolled his eyes at the older agent.

"Oh, thanks. Hey Jack, why don't we dance with your dad, too?" Reid suggested with vengeance, his eyes twinkling in mischief. Jack perked up at the suggestion and pulled his father towards the TV.

Hotch narrowed his eyes at the other agent, promising revenge in the near future. Jack was his kryptonite, and Reid was definitely taking advantage of that.

"Yeah! Daddy, come on!" Jack began dancing as the two agents exchanged playfully menacing glances. Hotch reluctantly willed his limbs to move to the beat, trying his best to keep some degree of dignity by dancing with a stern expression. It only made things a lot more amusing.

Reid had gotten over his initial embarrassment and was dancing as he enjoyed this newfound side of the older agent. For Hotch, it was as if he had gone back in time. Before Haley's death. When work hadn't consumed him and turned him into this dark, mechanical person. He was having fun for a change. Finding happiness in simpler things.

For the minute the three danced, everything was perfect.

Once the song was over, the two agents looked at each other and grinned like two children.

"You tell anyone else about this, I'll hunt you down," Hotch started, humor playing in his eyes despite the stern expression.

"I wouldn't dare," Reid answered, with his arms up in mock surrender.

Hotch plopped onto the floor and then lied down on the soft carpet floor with a content smile on his face. Reid followed suit and lied down as well, with Jack joining the two of them in the middle. The three stared up into the ceiling, listening to the sound of each others' breathing.

It really was perfect.

0

Jack was very persuasive in his argument to keep Reid for yet another sleepover, thanks to the puppy-dog look he had perfected over the years, but spending another night in the house was the last thing Reid wanted. If he wanted to maintain some semblance of sanity, that is.

The evening had given a whole new insight to Hotch as a person, not an FBI agent, and Reid found the smile, warmth and humor to be overwhelming. He was not going to last very long staying in such close proximity to the older man. He really didn't need another reason to love him.

Dr. Reid slammed his head against the wall of the bathroom as soon as he locked the door. He had succumbed to Jack's doe-eyes and pout combo and was now forced to spend the night at the Hotchner residency, where he was going to be hyper-aware of the other man sleeping in the vicinity.

After flushing the toilet and turning the tap on to prevent suspicion, Reid wiped his face furiously with his hands and then stared at himself in the mirror. Keep calm and carry on, he told himself.

Jack however, was apparently on a mission to make Uncle Spence's life a lot harder. Jack insisted on all three of them sleeping in a tent made of blankets and towels. A project that both Hotch and Reid had partaken in without knowledge of what to come. Hotch agreed without a second thought, which left Reid to agree to the preposition as well.

The three squeezed inside the tent, with the two agents to either sides of a very happy young boy. Reid was tired, of course he was. The case had taken so much out of him, but it was getting impossible to fall asleep when he could hear Hotch's breathing. The young genius squirmed uncomfortably, still careful not to wake the other two.

He tried counting sheep, even though past experiences had taught him that he just ended up counting to a four digit number and had moved on to other things. It wasn't going to help him then and wasn't going to help him now.

Reid ventured a glance at the unit chief's sleeping figure. Hotch looked so peaceful in his sleep, an arm wrapped protectively around his son. The young agent watched mesmerized, feeling his chest tighten. He wanted so badly to run his fingers across his face, to feel him against his skin. To validate that it was indeed Aaron Hotchner sleeping right next to him, that it wasn't some image his brain had conjured up as a result of his longing.

"Hotch..." Reid breathed softly. He knew he wasn't going to get an answer. He smiled sheepishly, embarrassed even though he knew no one was watching him.

It was the last thing he saw before he fell asleep.

0

Reid's eyes darted around frantically, trying to register his surroundings. He needed to know it was just a nightmare. His heart was still pounding in his head, his body covered in cold sweat.

"Reid?"

The young agent jumped at his name and then realized that Hotch was watching him with a hand on his shoulder. Reid swallowed a few times and cleared his throat, willing his voice to start working again.

"Hotch..." He croaked. "I'm sorry. Did I..." Reid wanted to ask if he was screaming and if that was what woke him up but trailed off. Hotch understood immediately.

"No. I just heard the sheets rustling. Jack's still asleep," Hotch lied for the other agent. Reid hadn't screamed. But he was whimpering, and that was what had gotten the unit chief's attention.

"I'm sorry for waking you up. I'll just sleep somewhere else for the night," Reid murmured, keeping his voice low. He quickly scanned Jack's sleeping figure and sighed in relief, glad that he hadn't woken the entire house up.

But it really wasn't making him feel any better. He should've known that the nightmares would come back. Of course they would. They always did.

"Reid, can we talk?" Hotch asked quietly, motioning to the opening of the tent. Reid nodded and followed his supervisor out, stretching his limbs in the process. The older man led the younger man to the kitchen and waited patiently for the other man to take a seat by him at the table.

"Reid. What's bothering you?" Hotch asked straightforwardly, his brows furrowed in concern. Reid swallowed hard, seeing the same expression he was so used to seeing around the office. He didn't want this turned into an interrogation and immediately turned defensive.

"It's just nightmares. I get them from time to time. Just work-related stress," Reid answered stiffly. The unit chief's frown deepened as he studied the younger man's demeanor.

"I couldn't sleep for days after Haley's death." Hotch paused and pulled his hands together in front of him. "Every time I closed my eyes, Foyet was there with Haley." Hotch closed his eyes for a brief moment before opening them again.

Reid listened in silence. Hotch had never told him something so intimate about himself. Especially after what Foyet had done.

"I didn't tell anyone. I pretended to be handling everything just fine for so long," Hotch continued, his eyes locked firmly onto Reid's. "Looking back, I wish I hadn't."

"Why?" Reid asked, his eyes wavering.

"Because hiding it never made anything better. Then one day, Rossi forced me to talk to him...and when I did, I could finally start moving on. I just hope that I can help you to do the same," he answered in a much softer tone.

"Hotch..." Reid began. "Have you ever wanted something you know you can't have?"

"...Yes, many things."

"What about something you want so badly, that it consumes every part of you? And you ask yourself why you let it happen in the first place. You blame yourself everyday, but you can't stop yourself. It haunts you, because you can never get away from it, and even if you wanted to run from it, deep down you know you won't, because-" Reid stopped himself when he realized he had been rambling.

"Reid, what is this about?" The older man asked, growing concerned that Reid may actually be using Dilaudid again.

"What," Reid continued after a nervous pause, "What happened after Tobias Hankel, I could overcome. But this, I'm not sure I can..."

Hotch watched the other man in silence before opening his mouth again. "Reid, can you tell me exactly what this is about?"

Reid bit his lower lip. For that moment, as he looked into the other man's eyes, he wanted so badly to tell him everything. The truth that was quickly becoming too much to keep bottled up inside. He was so tired. He kept telling himself that people became more emotional during the night, that his fatigue and the lingering fearing from his nightmare were making him want to give up on his secret.

But he knew he had to hold onto it. He would never risk having the other man know.

"I can't. Not yet."

"I understand. Just remember what I told you. Even if it's not me," Hotch replied calmly, knowing from experience that pushing the matter wasn't going to help Reid open up any better. "Let's go back to sleep. Feel free to sleep anywhere you feel comfortable."

"I'll join you in the tent."

Hotch didn't miss the sad smile on the younger agent's face.

0

The next morning, or more accurately around noon, the three were busy bustling around the kitchen in their attempt to fix a decent brunch. Reid was in charge of toasts, juice and assisting Jack in setting the table, while Hotch was responsible for making anything that required actual culinary skills.

Jack laughed at Reid when he managed to burn the first batch of toasts.

After the meal, just before they were getting ready to leave for another stroll in the park, Hotch received an urgent phone call from the bureau. He was requested by another team for help on a case, which forced him to leave the other two to spend the day together until he was finished. Reid agreed wholeheartedly to watching over little Hotchner, knowing he had nothing better to do than to read along at home otherwise.

A stroll in the park, a stop at an ice cream store, a quick mac and cheese dinner and Ice Age 3 later, Reid succeeded in tucking Jack into bed. Hotch had called early to apologize to him about running late, so it was up to the young doctor to ensure that Jack got an early night.

For Reid, who had never spent so many hours alone with a child, the experience felt quite nice. It made him wonder if he would have grown into a different person if his own father had spent time with him like he had with Jack. He pushed the thought aside, knowing it was only going to depress him.

Spencer crept out of Jack's room and closed the door quietly, trying his best not to wake the boy up. He was now going to have to just wait in the living room for Hotch's return so that he could go home. As relaxing as the evening was, he desperately needed actual sleep, and it was taking everything in his power to not just pass out on the couch.

After hours of running through old textbooks in his head, the young doctor glanced at the clock to see that it was a few minutes past midnight. What the hell was taking Hotch so long? Surely he wasn't arguing against Strauss or had taken up another case without his knowing... Had something happened on his way back home?

Reid sighed and tried to calm himself down. Hotch had a tendency to get lost in his work, so it wouldn't be all too surprisingly if he had lost track of time doing filework. He had always been dedicated to the bureau.

Then a faint sound was heard from the doorway. Reid got off the couch and slowly made his way towards the front door. He waited, but the sound disappeared. The young agent frowned and made his way to the door and looked through the peephole. There was nothing.

Must've been a cat or something...Reid huffed and returned to the living room, brushing his tired eyes with his hands.

"Where's your son?

Reid froze.

He didn't recognize the voice but he recognized the situation. He felt his blood run cold as he stood still, his hands still on his eyes. An all too familiar click sounded behind him, and he knew immediately that he was at a gunpoint.

"I said, where's your son?"


Yes, I understand this one is a bit of a cliffy, but I realized I needed more time to really work on what follows!

Thank you so SO much for all the wonderful reviews, and I hope you enjoyeed this chapter. Let me know what you think! And please, please, PLEASE have a wonderful Christmas! :)