Marnie let one of her eyes open slightly, readjusting her head to move away from the sliver of light creeping through the window. She let out a long exhale, feeling the minor hangover radiating from her brow line. After a second she realized that she was alone in bed. She pushed her body to a seated position using her left hand to prop her up with the other one pulling the covers to her bare chest. It's not that she expected Jessa to be there, but she was just confused as to what happened after she had fallen asleep in her arms. I feel so used. She chuckled to herself. But I kind of like it.

After slipping on an oversized t-shirt over her naked body, she went to the kitchen and immediately put on the coffee. As she was waiting for it to brew, she couldn't help but replay the events of yesterday in her head – not just what happened with Jessa, but the entire day. She had spent her morning listening scrolling through Charlie's pictures, filled herself with self-loathing. It also didn't help the situation that she had to play Demi Lovato to drown out Hannah's and Adam's weird, perverted sex noises. Then after that, her hair still in a sloppy bun, donning her grungiest pajamas, she was actually happy that Jessa stopped by… well, more like barged in, but still. She knew if there was anyone who hated life more than she did at that moment, it would definitely be Jessa. So, she let herself bond over how lovably annoying Hannah is and her strange (but not, not nice) boyfriend. And, when Jessa sat up and turned over on the couch, looking deeply at Marnie and told her how gorgeous she looked "all stripped down." Marnie quoted Jessa in her head with an exaggerated British accent: It's totally working.

But, God, that girl. Jessa was taking over her life – or, well, her morning at least. But why? Maybe because it was her first lesbian experience. She cringed a little bit at the word. Wait, does that make me… her thought was cut off by the loudly steaming coffee maker. She shook her head and poured herself a cup with a splash of milk, which was dangerously close to the "cushioned" expiration date that Adam was going on about yesterday. Honestly, milk is good for like another three days, at least.

She let the hot coffee slide down the back of throat and couldn't help herself from thinking, should I be feeling this way?

Jessa collapsed on her bed in Shoshanna's apartment. She had snuck around four that morning. It's not that she didn't want to spend the night; in fact, she was really enjoying having her arms wrapped around the gorgeous girl. God, she's even pretty when she's asleep she had thought to herself as she lied awake in Marnie's bed. Jessa was uncomfortable with the idea of being that comfortable with someone… what does that even mean? This was just like her, though. The second things start to feel real, she runs away, usually to another country. She honestly just uses the "Free Spirit" as a cover for all of her insecurities. It was her dad's fault really; he was like that, too. He had a tendency to leave his children (i.e. her) and his current wives (i.e. too many to count) when things started to get "boring," as he had tried to explain it. She obviously didn't want to take after her father, considering how hurt she was when he essentially fell off the face of the earth at the moments when she needed him the most. Why was she treating Marnie this way, too, then? She obviously needed Jessa to help her through a difficult time, and, when Jessa had comforted her the only way she knew how, she left Marnie stranded.

All these thoughts were overwhelming, so she decided to occupy her thoughts by "redecorating" (or whatever you want to call it) Shosh's apartment.

Her mental recovery was interrupted, however, when Katharine decided to grace Jessa with her presence. Of all the people she didn't want to deal with, Katharine was top on the list right now. Granted, Jessa had kind of half intentionally seduced her husband, but that was a victimless crime… not counting when he got punched in the face. Jessa was seriously only half listening to Katharine go on about how much she still sort of hated her for what she did because, honestly, there are worst things in the world. "You cause all this trouble and you don't know why. In my opinion, you're doing to distract yourself from the person you're meant to be."

"Which is who?"

"You tell me." Katharine looked proud of herself, thinking she had hit the nail on the head, so she continued. "And she might really be serious about something… or someone, and she might be a lot happier than you are right now."

'Or someone'? Jessa kept replaying those words in her head. How dare Katharine barge into her (well, Shoshanna's) apartment and get all Dear Abby on her. But she couldn't help but consider the slight possibility that Katharine was right. She was obviously lacking something in her life, which is probably why she always abandoned ship the second things got tough. Maybe the stuff with Marnie is a test. Maybe her life was throwing this curve ball at her to see if she had grown at all. Doubtful, she thought. It's hard to fix something that has been broken longer than it's been functional.