Far far back in the very far back distant past, which was very far back lived a man and woman. They had a very rough marriage. They often times split up because the wife, Riza Hawkeye, blamed the husband, Roy Mustang, of cheating on her with other women. One time she even read a piece of fanfiction and began to assume that he was cheating on her with men. One night, when she was especially angry, she ordered him to go out to taco bell to buy her some...tacos. When he got to the taco bell he found out that he didn't have enough money to buy her the grande tacos, so he made a deal with the cashier.

"I'll trade you this chick that I've been cheating with, for those tacos." Roy said.

"What are you a pedophile, that chick looks like she's only a teenager! I'll take her off her hands though."

So Roy traded the girl for his grande tacos, and went on his way.

Many weeks later the cashier stuck the girl in the very top room of his apartment complex. Yes, this taco bell cashier does own his own apartment complex! Back to the story. Since the apartment complex was old, the doors were rusted shut. So the Cashier ordered the girl to let down her wrench. Kinda like this: "Hey b**ch, hey b**ch, let down your amazon wrench!"

One day a brave suit of armour named Al saw the cashier climb up to his room.

"I bet he has kitties up there!" Al said.

The next day while the cashier was working on a holiday, Al went up to the apartment complex.

"Hey...I don't say naughty words..." Al complained, "But I guess I have too this time...Hey b**ch, hey b**ch, let down your amazon wrench! I feel dirty."

So the suit of Armour named Al climbed up to the room and found that there were no kitties, just a chick with a ginormous wrench.

"Hey! Do you want to go out?" Al said.

"Sorry, I can't. I already love some one else." The girl said right before a short man named Edward scooped her up into his arms and ran off.