Bit of a lighter chapter than the last one. Hopefully you'll be able to see where this story is heading. I hope you enjoy it


When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore.

Ignoring the overly cheesy song, I look over at Henry who is seriously considering the items on the menu before him. We are sitting at a table for six even though it is just the two of us at the moment.

Closing my own menu that lays in front of me, I clear my throat to address him. "So why Tony's today and not Granny's?" Holding his finger up to signal one more minute, he gives the menu one last glance and then finally looks up at me.

"I thought a change of scenery would be nice. Plus everyone goes to Granny's and I don't trust everybody right now. I think we should be making our plans somewhere a little more low key."

At that moment a waiter comes over to our table.

"Hello, my name is Lady. Are you two ready to order yet?"

I open my mouth to say yes when Henry interrupts me. " No, sorry, we are actually waiting for some more people to arrive."

She smiles and nods her head while walking away.

I lean towards him from across the table. "More people? Who is all coming tonight?" I was hoping all of this operation business could be just between me and Henry. I can only guess who will be joining us, and when I see the bunch of idiots walking through the door, I am not at all surprised. Hook is taking Emma's coat off and her father is laughing at something said between the three. "These people?! Really Henry? You know how I feel about them." I cannot believe this.

Henry waves them over to where we are sitting and quietly replies to me. " You guys worked so well together against the Wicked Witch and in Neverland. Plus I think this could be the thing that brings us closer again. Besides, I've worked with these people before; they get the job done."

"Hey kid, how's it going?" Emma sits down at the table, at the chair furthest away from me. Smart girl. Hook and Charming sit on either side of her.

"It's going." A few more pleasantries are made and after a few minutes we are all sitting awkwardly at the table with our drinks in front of us. "So," Henry starts us off, " we are all here for an important reason."

"Hook's wardrobe." Charming nods his head. Really?

"Do you for one minute think I would agree to a meeting about the moronic pirate's fashion?" I retort. What an idiot.

"Hey!" Emma bristles. Charming is about to come to his mate's defense, but Henry holds up his hands.

"No, we are not here about the Captain's dismal wardrobe."

"Oh, like all of you dress so bloody great. I'll have you know, I could wear nothing but a burlap sack and still be the most handsome man in the room." I feel a headache coming on and rub my temples. There is no way these people could ever help me. All they ever bring me is trouble and headaches.

"Everybody stop! This is serious." Henry says getting frustrated. "We are here to get my mom back together with Robin." Emma looks over at Hook chewing her lip. I suppose she is still feeling a bit of guilt. Good.

"How are we supposed to help with that?" Charming asks reaching for one of the rolls in the middle of the table. If this is the genius he brought to the war tables that won against me, then I am deeply shamed.

"Well I figured you are all people with experience in achieving hard won love. I imagine a lot of planning and manipulating went into that, so I thought we could use your own expertise to bounce some ideas around about how we might get Robin to go back to my mom."

"Oh, a challenge. I like it." Hook wraps his arm around Emma. She rolls her eyes, but doesn't shrug his arm off like I expected. Apparently their trip to the past has brought them closer.

"How do you feel about this Regina?" Emma asks. I think about her question for a moment and can only come up with one conclusion.

"Well, I didn't leave from the table the moment I saw your faces, which is a testament of how desperate I am truly feeling." Henry sighs at my response, but the rest of the company at the table seem to find my answer acceptable. None of us are a stranger to desperation. The pizza we had order finally arrives and the Prince cannot help himself from a bad joke.

"Well then, let's dig in!"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"Really? This is the best you can come up with?" An hour of my life has been wasted on these morons.

"What? I think it is a superb idea." The pirate retorts with sauce all over his face, only further proving what a fool he is. Emma laughs and throws a napkin at his face.

"All you have suggested is that we kidnap Marian and drop her off in Canada!" The headache is back in full force.

"Canada is a beautiful place." Charming puts in. "So beautiful she will never want to leave. Plus it's not like she knows that Storybrooke is in Maine, she could probably never find her way back.

I finally speak my thoughts. "You are all idiots, and the fact that any of you have survived this long and found happiness baffles me."

"Maybe we could try throwing out some more ideas guys." Henry tries to get the table under control.

"You could try to seduce him. You have the goods to succeed." Hook waves his hand at me. The frown on Emma's face makes me smirk a tiny bit.

"What does that mean?" She glares at him. He just tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear. Disgusting.

"Don't fret lass. I was just paying the Queen a compliment. We all know where my heart lies." Charming gags a bit and Henry just shakes his head. "We are trying to get my mom her happily ever after, not a one night stand."

"Henry!" I say appalled. "Where did you learn such things?"

"Please, I'm twelve and I lived in New York City. A person learns things." I shoot a glance at Emma who is also giving Henry a disapproving look. I can see what a year without my parenting has done to my sweet boy.

"My apologizes for even bringing the subject up." Hook holds up his hand and hook. "Perhaps we could try something less crude."

"How do people normally fall in love?" Charming throws out the question to the group waiting for an answer.

"Normally they have a few drinks, talk, laugh and eat." Emma answers.

"Sometimes they threaten each other's lives." Hook adds, and she smiles.

I roll my eyes. "Well I've already done all of those. The problem isn't getting him to fall in love with me, I'm pretty sure he already does. The problem is getting him to choose me over his wife."

"How did you get Milah to leave her husband for you?" Henry asks the pirate.

He raises his eyebrow and answers with one word, "Swag."

Charming spits out his drink and I look for the waitress to signal for the check. "How does he even know that word!?" the prince sputters.

Everyone sits in silence for a minute in awkward silence. "Well," Emma moves on with the insanity that is this meeting, "if watching soap operas and teen dramas has taught me anything, it's that the way to win a guy back is through jealousy."

"Jealousy?" I say. "Isn't that a bit childish and, oh I don't know, stupid?"

"I know I was never crazier when I thought Emma was going to be with Bae." Hook says with a sad look on his face. I never really paid much attention to their little drama, but his face says that there was more than just a simple love triangle at play. If I remember correctly, the pirate cared for the other man. How messy our lives get.

"You know Mom, if Robin thought you were with another man that might just be the thing to get him to realize just how much he needs to be with you. Then you two would have to get back together."

I ponder this for a moment. Although I still think it is childish I don't have much to lose. "But who could we get to agree to be my new fake boyfriend?"

Charming rejoins our conversation after putting his phone away which was probably used to text Snow. "We don't have to say he is your boyfriend. He could just be a friend. As long as you are with a man, who could possibly turn into more, that should be enough to get Robin jealous." The thought that Robin would actually think I could move on from him in such a short time is absurd, but having just a male friend could do the trick.

"But we would need a man who would be able to be around all the time, preferably no job, and be rather attractive to make Robin jealous. Plus he would have to go along with this crazy idea. Who do we know who meet all of those criteria?" I ask. We all have puzzled looks on our faces, but it is Emma who is the first one to think of someone and she laughs.

"I know the perfect guy mad enough to help us. And he owes me one."