The Five Times Morgan Could Have Kissed Reid and the One Time He Did
A/N: Verbal dialogue (while in the bullpen) taken from the CBS show Criminal Minds. NOT MINE. Directional positioning (while in the bullpen) taken from Matthew Gray Gubler and Shemar Moore. NOT MINE. Inner dialogue and directional positioning afterward is all mine. Other than that I barely own anything.
-Blue Skies
(3) The Archer
It was hard for Morgan to watch Spencer make out with Lila Archer. He grimaced and looked away from the scene, half praying that the stalking unsub would just kill her already.
Morgan smacked his own wrist.
Come on, dude, he thought to himself, that's wrong.
Obviously Spencer felt something for her, and she for him. Morgan folded his arms. This is crap. How can they be so passionately in love with each other, they've only known each other for a few days! That slutty actress doesn't know Spencer. Not like Morgan does. She hasn't stood beside him while the scariest monsters she could ever imagine materialized before him. She hasn't spent hours on the phone with him during those long nights when his sleep was plagued with nightmares. She hasn't sat there across from him for months, pining after him, lusting for every inch of that slender, sultry body. She doesn't know him. She never will.
Yet, there sat Spencer hours later, staring at their picture on the cover of a magazine. She must look beautiful in it. Damn her. Knowing that he's this pissed, Morgan has two options: snatch the magazine out of Spencer's hands like a jealous girlfriend and demand attention, or go all "wise old mentor" on the kid and tell him to go for it. Spencer seemed happy with her, and (as much as that made Morgan want to become their next unsub, murdering her and scattering her corpse across the Americas) he had to encourage it. Reid and that blonde bimbo would end up being happy together. Maybe.
So, Morgan decided to do neither and just leave.
Everyone was gone for the night anyway and there seemed to be nothing to say. Spencer's brain was working on its nightly overdrive and Morgan could almost hear the gears grinding in that big head of his. It was one of his favorite things about Spencer. The fact that the kid lived in his mind half of the time was extremely endearing. Breaking the kid out of his thought streak as he left, Morgan teased simply, "Night, Hollywooood!"
Spencer ran his hand along the side of his face tiredly, "Come on, man."
Morgan shrugged and decided to walk up to his desk, "You know, Reid. You're lucky they didn't get a shot of you next to the pool trying to dry your gun—you looked like a wet rat."
Spencer shook his head and glared over at Morgan.
"Hey." Morgan replied, getting closer in sincerity, "I was playin'."
Fretting with his fingers, Spencer mumbled out with a light shade of pink playing along his high cheekbones, "Did you know that she…uh… I kissed her in the pool. So weird, it doesn't even feel like it really happened. You know?"
Morgan knew. He could feel his heart breaking in his chest as Spencer stated it out loud, making it real. He slapped on a plastic smile, "Sure, sure. She's a beautiful young actress."
Spencer mused, still not all there, "Yeah. You know, I kept explaining to her about transference and the fact that, you know, she probably only liked me because I was there to protect her..."
Morgan stopped him there, telling him to his face, "Spencer. You were her hero."
"Yeah, I wanted to think that..." Spencer murmured.
Morgan shook his head, "No, no, no, don't go selling yourself short, kid. You took down an armed subject without firing a shot. You saved her life. That's pretty much a hero in my book."
Spencer glanced up at Morgan and then looked back down as if he was almost embarrassed to ask, "Let me ask you this, have you ever crossed your professional boundaries with a victim on a case you've been working on?"
Morgan replied simply, "No."
Spencer sighed self-deprecatingly, "It's pretty bad, right?"
"There's some things you can't control… even with that big ol' brain of yours." Morgan said, not at all talking about Lila until he caught himself and finished, "No harm, no foul. Let it go," and began to leave the room. He can't look at Spencer anymore. He's lost him.
Spencer stopped him with a, "Hey, Morgan?"
Morgan glanced over his shoulder and replied, "Yeah?"
Spencer looked away from him and stammered, ears going red, "Has… has there ever been a girl that you…well, wanted to be with for more than, you know, just one night?"
Morgan raised his eyebrows. What was this kid trying to ask? He replied, "Excuse me?"
Spencer's face grew an even more livid shade as he raised his palms in surrender as if he were trying to tell Morgan he wasn't saying what he thought he was saying, "I-I-I've never seen you... with the same girl twice."
Morgan began to laugh, "Wha', you calling me a dog?" This can't be going where it sounds like it's going.
Spencer fretted aloud, "No! No, not at all. I'm just trying to figure out if… this feeling I have is ever going to go away."
Morgan growled to himself. Of course. Lila. Morgan's emotions got the better of him for a moment as he replied, "Spencer, what we do for a living, it takes up all our time. And a relationship's hard enough even in the same city, not to mention on the other side of the continent."
Spencer sighed a sigh of relief, "So… you're saying it's probably wise that I don't call her, right?"
Wait, Spencer didn't want to call her? Then…what were they talking about? Did this have anything to do with Lila at all? Morgan shrugged and grabbed his bag, walking backwards toward the door. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. He replied as he started to leave, "I can't answer that one for you. But I can tell you what I do know. You don't need to come up with that answer tonight. I'm out."
Spencer waved an awkward hand. It was endearing as fuck. He mumbled, "Have a good weekend."
Morgan chuckled, "Yeah, you too, Romeo."
Spencer stared at the magazine and threw it out. Then he picked it up and grabbed his coat, running out after Morgan, "Hey, wait! Morgan, wait!"
Morgan stopped in the dark hallway, looking back at his young coworker, "Yeah—"
Spencer caught up to him and before either of them could take a breath, he grabbed Morgan by the collar and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Stepping away afterward, Spencer said shyly, "…thanks for the advice. I think I know what I'm going to do."
Morgan rubbed the back of his neck noncommittally, "What was that for?"
"Um… what was what?" Spencer pushed his hair behind his ears, face beginning to turn that lovely shade of pink as he feigned innocence and started off down the hallway. Morgan watched as he left. Damn. Moment's gone. He could have gone for it. But, he didn't.
A/N: Tomorrow: MY MAMA SAYS ELEVATORS ARE THE DEVIL
(I wonder what scene that'll be...)
