Chapter three
"Why didn't you turn up?" Riku raged as soon as he stepped through the door. "Axel, the interview was today."
He thundered into the living room to find Axel lying on the sofa watching music videos. He was still wearing what he had had on that morning. Spikes kinked from bed head and falling in front of his eyes, jogging bottoms that hung around his hips, the tattoo of the dragon that Riku said he hated -but secretly loved- snaking around his back and across his stomach. Did Riku mention that the redhead was topless?
He stood there and smiled slowly. Axel always knew how to get his attention.
"I had nothing to wear." He drawled, stretching his body out like a cat.
"You have a wardrobe full of suits" Riku sighed
"The suit I wanted to wear was not really interview material."
As he said those words he slid off the sofa, those penetrating green eyes staring at Riku, trying to work out if he really was mad or if this was a prelude to something way more fun than fighting.
The feral growl that emanated from Riku's throat betrayed him. He grabbed Axel by the back of the head and yanked him forward into a ferocious kiss.
He ignored the scratchiness of the day old beard as the smell as his body drew in all his senses. At least that morning he'd had the courtesy to clean his teeth.
"I'm just trying to help you Ax" Riku whispered between kisses
"I'm not one of your restoration projects."
"I know."
"What do you want from me?"
"Just you. Upstairs now" Riku murmured against the kiss.
Axel was his Kryptonite.
His suit lay crumpled on the stairs, tie around the doorknob of the bathroom. Axel's jogging bottoms were lost somewhere. He didn't care where, they were the ugliest things ever anyway.
They lay together on the hallway floor, not getting as far as the bedroom, surrounded my the smell of sweat and sex
"Shower" said Riku, rolling Axel away from him.
The redhead groaned, but complied. Riku lay for a moment before joining him in the hot water, hopeful for a repeat performance. He soaked in the smell of the goddamn redhead, who always made him lose his train of thought and love it.
Riku sauntered into the gym that evening, it was one of the only places he went that felt like home. Everyone knew not to bother him, it was like the customers were told when they registered, that he was to be left alone.
On the left as he walked in he noticed a short blonde man having trouble with the weight machine. If he wasn't careful he would get himself squashed underneath the pile of weights he'd liberally added to the machine.
"Watch it. You'll kill yourself." He said, rushing over to take some of the weight.
"Thanks. My first time here." the blonde said, not looking up
"No, problem. Riku" He said, helping up the blonde, who looked a bit pale, but quickly gathered his wits when he noticed who had helped him.
"Roxas. How can I thank the person who saved me from potentially fatal embarrassment?"
The clang of the weights broke the uncomfortable vibe as they receded into their starting position.
"Are you here by yourself?"
"I'm taken."
"I didn't ask that. I asked you if you were here by yourself?"
"Yes, my partner's not into gyms. He said he'd rather get hot and sweaty at home."
If the comment was meant to put Roxas off, it did the opposite. He blushed slightly. Of course a guy that looked like this would have someone.
Truth be told, Riku was glad of the attention. Axel was at home, refusing to get a job or go to any interviews he'd sorted for him. Preferring to be a kept man, which Riku found a bit of a passion killer.
After a year, he wasn't even sure why the redhead was still around other than the fact that he was a fantastic lay and could make a mean lasagna.
Riku smiled at the blonde and went to use to other equipment. He wasn't the type to cheat, couldn't abide by being cheated on himself. It would be hypocritical to not apply the same standards he had for himself, to others.
He turned to watch the blonde on the treadmill, before getting on the rowing machine. Well, he could look couldn't he?
"Can I buy you a coffee, for you know, saving me."
Riku looked up from the sports equipment, to see Roxas standing over him.
"As friends, of course"
Riku nodded
As they sipped black coffees in the gym cafe and watched the world go by, he noticed Roxas staring at him. Riku sighed, he couldn't get Axel to do this with him. It wasn't that he was shy, far from it, it was the fact that he would have to go out in public with him. Sometimes he just thought that the redhead was ashamed of him in some way.
Roxas was staring at him again, this innocent blue eyes questioning.
"What is it Roxas?" He said, turning his attention to his companion.
"You're 'that' Riku, aren't you?" he said, holding up a celebrity magazine. The article had a picture from a recent charity ball.
Riku nodded.
"You're alone in this picture."
"My partner doesn't like coming with me to stuff like that. He says you have to be nice to everyone and he's not too good in large crowds of people he doesn't know."
There he goes, making excuses again.
"If I had you, I'd go to this stuff with you." Roxas said quietly.
He finished his coffee, put his payment on the table and grabbed his coat.
"I can get yours."
"No" Snapped Roxas "I don't care who you are Mr. Big-shot. I work, I can pay my way." His voice was softer. "See you around 'Ku"
He left Riku sitting in the booth open mouthed. No-one had ever called him 'Ku, except Axel with his sharp green eyes and cutting smile. The way Roxas said it sounded luxurious and tempting. Guilt ate at him from the inside.
"What are you wearing a tux for?"
Axel entered the bedroom and threw himself on the bed.
"It's the charity auction date tonight. I told you about it weeks ago when I got asked to be a prize."
"If I would have got you looking like that, I would have bid for you myself."
Axel licked his lips slowly
"And leave the house for somewhere with natural light?" Riku snapped, not turning round
"Phone bidding" Axel grinned behind the words "You can't go like that" he snapped suddenly.
"Why not?"
"Not in those trousers. They cling in all the right places. All my favorite places." His voice leacherous "Besides, you could give your date the wrong Idea."
"Not everyone is as sex obsessed as you."
Before Riku had time to move away, he felt Axel run kisses up the side of his neck, one of his weak spots. Damn, the guy was good.
"Axel, please stop." He said a little halfheartedly.
"Stop what?"
"You know what. I can't go on a date for charity smelling of sex."
"Your date will know that you're private property."
"He already knows."
"It's a guy?"
"You remember the guy I saved at the gym? It's him."
"The guy who is not as scrawny and plain as you made him out to be?"
"Have you been spying on me?"
"Yuff works evenings in the cafe, you know that. She told me."
"Oh."
"In that case, you are definitely not wearing that tux. Let me help you pick something else out."
"If you had your way, I'd be wearing a bin bag or several layers of jumpers"
"And you'd still look hot."
Riku smiled, that was about as romantic as Axel got and he'd take what he could get."
"Love you too Ax." He said quietly.
Axel couldn't hear anyway, his head already in the wardrobe. He started to throw items of clothing at Riku.
10 minutes later, Riku was wearing loose fitting dark blue jeans, a light grey button down shirt, a dark blue tie and a dark green blazer.
"Somethings missing" Said Axel as he surveyed his handiwork.
He reached down to his trousers and undid his belt. His favorite one that Riku had got him for his birthday. It was black leather with silver twin clasps shaped like chackrams. He reached around Riku and gently threaded the belt through this trouser loops. He looked Riku up and down approvingly.
"Shoes" He muttered as he dove back into the wardrobe and pulled out some dark green converse that were still boxed.
"Put these on."
As Riku obliged, Axel grabbed a hair band and pulled his silver hair into a low ponytail.
Riku tried to leave the house, but was met at the door.
"Be back by 12 or you might turn into a pumpkin."
Axel thrust his other favourite possession at Riku. His floor length black leather coat. He may not be the jealous type, but he sure liked to mark his territory.
"I insist that this stays buttoned up all night. Don't want you catching a cold, you won't be any use to me."
Riku rolled his eyes at the flimsy excuse and left for the date.
When he returned late that night, Axel didn't ask any questions. He just pulled Riku inside the house. He immediately pushed Riku against the hallway wall.
"Ax, are you feeling insecure?"
"Me? Never"
"You've nothing to worry about." Riku laughed, which seemed to enrage the redhead who yanked Riku's hair from it's ponytail.
"Remember who you have at home." The smirk on his face growing to cheshire cat proportions.
Riku walked in through the front door after work a few days later, expecting to find Axel lounging on the sofa watching TV, surrounded by beer cans and cartons of Chinese food. Creeping into the dark room, he was surprised to find that he wasn't there. Then he heard a peal of laughter coming from the kitchen. Axel's laughter, something he hadn't heard for months. He smiled and walked into the kitchen to be greeted by an open bottle of champagne. He was drunk.
"'Ku." He giggled. Axel never giggled. "I've got a job."
"How? You haven't left the living room for weeks?"
Axel grinned and let the comment slide, but the glint in his eyes indicated that Riku was going to regret it later.
"Reno got it for me. I'm managing a band called 'Refrain of Denial'. All those music videos I've watched will finally come in handy. I've always wanted to be in a band"
It had never occurred to Riku that all the job interviews that he'd arrange for Axel were for a man that Riku wanted him to be rather than for who he was. Which was probably why he was always late or never turned up at all. Axel had just been humoring him the whole time, but his irritation was quelled by the next few words from the redheads mouth.
"Let's go out."
Riku stared at him, speechless. Eyebrow raised in disbelief.
"I mean it. Lets go out. Where do you want to go?"
He took a long glug from the champagne and offered it to Riku.
"Relax 'Ku. Have a drink, we'll fuck, we'll get ready and go out. There's a new bar in town."
Riku smiled and took the bottle, which from the label was his best champagne, but he didn't care. They were going to celebrate the fact that Axel had a job and was finally happy.
"When I have my first gig, you'll be there won't you " Axel slurred
"I promise."
They are ushered past the queue when they arrive at the bar and into the VIP area. Not one of Riku's type of places, all neon tube lights, glass and mirrors. As the bouncers, carved a path through the crowd, Riku noticed Roxas at the bar, he was there with a couple of blonde guys who couldn't keep their hand to themselves. A brunette kissed him on the cheek and Riku felt his blood boil, even though he had right to feel that way. They had had a connection on their charity date, Riku had felt it. A surge akin to electricity when they discussed buildings and art. Riku closed his eyes and remembered the others face when he had mentioned his own art. He had drawn a dragon on a cloth napkin and signed it, for when he was famous.
How dare that girl kiss him, that was his Roxas. The blonde noticed him and smiled, one that said get me out of here. Riku felt his heart jump. Roxas needed saving by a prince charming.
He was about to go over when Axel put a possessive arm around his shoulders and dragged him into a dark corner, to sit on the velvet chairs of the VIP room behind a velvet rope, drink neat whiskey and chain smoke.
Riku had always been a romantic, but he was actually pleased that when they went out together Axel liked a low profile. If anyone found out that Axel was with him, they'd crucify him. He could be buried in negative publicity until the end of the world.
They were complete opposites who in circumstances other than their beginning, would have never got together. Not that they had ever discussed it, the whole being boyfriends thing, it was just a mutual acknowledgment.
Roxas on the other hand actually wanted to be with him and Riku was a sucker for someone with dreams and ambition.
As much as Riku loved the fact that Axel had a job and was now contributing to the bills, he was never home. Preferring to hang out with the band. He would return from weeks away and pass out on the sofa or stay up in the study writing press releases or redesigning the website. If Riku saw him once a month he considered himself lucky.
He awoke one night to find that the other side of the bed had not been slept in. He got up and trudged silently down the hallway. The light was on in the study. Axel was slumped on the desk, a mug of cold coffee next to him, the screen blank and the computer off.
Riku poked the redhead in the shoulder and he woke up with a tired yawn.
"'Ku, I thought you were in bed"
"You would rather sleep in here than with me?"
"Of course not"
Riku was not reassured by that statement. He couldn't tell when Axel was being serious or not.
"Why are you still here Axel? Don't say it's because you love me, because I know you don't and I don't think you ever did."
Axel said nothing
"You're never home, always out with the band and you refuse to kiss me when you get back.
"You're being a baby 'Ku, a stupid romantic. It's called promotion. We have to sign posters and stuff for teenage girls and weird kids. You'll thank me one day, when we are world famous. Anyway, you should understand better than most people. You're on TV every other day and spend a lot of time at work"
"But I'm not pandering to a bunch of horny teenagers"
Sometimes he thought he didn't mind the way Axel was, just to feel 'd been through a lot together. He gave himself a mental slap.
"No Axel, I need more. I want more. I deserve more. I want someone who is around and who isn't ashamed to be seen with me, who I'm not ashamed to be seen with."
"I'm not ashamed 'Ku. You just want me to be someone I can't be. I'm sorry"
Watching Axel leave the next morning felt like he was being held underwater, like he was drowning. He would never be with the redhead again. Maybe Axel didn't need him anymore, maybe he just needed Axel to cling onto like a life preserver.
Riku considered calling after him, apologizing and asking him to come home. He also knew in the back of him mind that Axel had gone and had been gone a long time.
He lay on the kingsize bed and stared up at the ceiling. The house felt empty and quiet. He was alone. Tears started to well up, but he pushed them back down. He gulped back short breaths. This was for the best, but he really hated sleeping alone.
