Chapter 2
This party practically screams, 'I'm cliche.' It was right out of a story book.
Little Frankie gets a surprise party.
I'm turning eighteen and there's a fucking clown in my back yard. Both of my parents have worked their asses to the bone to treat me like a child and are disgustingly bashful about it. Like I'm going to let them in. Couldn't they see I can never get better? They don't understand me. They where never even close enough to protect me. So why celebrate me now? I have become a recluse, so what are they trying to prove to me?
I feel exploited. Exposed. Overburdened. Once again In a place to be a victim of the danger in my own back yard.
But I'm not ready to be shown to anyone. I am incondite. I am raw and ruined. Filled with angst.
My mom pretends to be cheery for the guests. My step dad with his half-assed, tacked up smile.
The guests. They act like everything is fine. Like nothing ever happened.
None of them try to get me to speak. They just talk. Talk about their lives. What I missed. Who's with who. Everything but me. Nobody talks about what happened because they're scared.
Hell. I'm scared.
No, not scared. Scarred. I'm scarred and they treat my situation delicately.
The only person here I'm really scared of is my nympho therapist.
I'd say I'm a good sport. I smile and nod at all the right places. I pretend to e surprised when they all jump out and tell 'surprise' even though I saw them running around through my window. I even use the little sign they made that says 'thank you(:' when I open the presents.
I open the presents in the first place.
They would be nice if it were for a different person.
All the items I got were too distant. Nothing was personal. Just things you would get for a distant relative.
I 'thanked' them anyways. After all, later they would be shoved under the bed. My important stuff in a suit case, clutched tightly in my hand.
I sat there while they all sang. Is waved when they left. I still wouldn't let them touch me. I even touched my moms shoulder before I went upstairs.
They thought I was going to bed.
Jokes on them.
Looks like they're the ones getting a surprise.
Here alone, standing barefoot in our lawn,
Worms squeezing their way through my toes...
Tonight that's how it goes.
I've quickly pieced together all the disfigured pieces of my life into one suit case, padding the corners for the delicate thousands of dollars I've stolen from my moms sock drawer. I'll wait till midnight. And then, I'll go.
