Rating: M
Genre: Drama
Summary: Embark on a small journey into the fragile lives of those believed to have it all. Behind the cameras, monsters on the inside. But you might know them better as celebrities. AU, KaiTal, ReiBry, BrookBry, TyHil, anti-ReiMar.
Warnings: violence, drug use, sex, rape, mature themes, character death, and Kai's minor antagonism.
Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade, nor do I own any of the recognisable characters featured in this story.
In no way do I promote any of the ideas presented in these chapters. I write with the sole purpose of entertaining and have no intention of spreading immoral ideas. This story is simply a reflection on what I believe to be the attitude of today's society in general. I will not accept any abuse related to the themes written in the following fanfiction.
(A/N): This is a bit of an odd chapter, because it sort of feels as though the events should be spread over two of maybe three chapters, but it's all compressed into one. It's because about half-way through we jump about a week or so ahead. If I'd put the second half in a different chapter they would have been really short…though having said that, the next chapter is record-breakingly short anyway…:P
We've also begun the lemon-chain :P Chapters 2, 3, 4 and 5 all contain different forms of lemon, with different people. I hadn't originally intended to put in so many, nor to put them all in a row, but it sort of worked out that way.
Character List: (also shows age)
Tala (25)- the current fashion icon
Kai (32)- a widely-known agent and producer
Rei (28)- an actor, retired young
Mariah (27)- Rei's wife, an actress past her prime
Lin (6)- Rei and Mariah's daughter
Bryan (23)- a rock star
Brooklyn (23)- Bryan's psychotic band-mate and boyfriend
Max (32)- a renowned lawyer
Ming-Ming (16)- a young, new pop singer trying to make her dream career happen
Hilary (24)- a gorgeous movie star
Tyson (24)- Hilary's dim-witted husband, and a sports star
(Tyson and Hilary don't have any actual roles within the plotlines of this story. They appear at the very beginning and end, and act as a sort of template for celebrities).
Italics are memories, thoughts or any sort of dream. Bold are headlines or any form of magazine print
Enjoy!
Love on the Catwalk
By StZen
Chapter 3
Please Kill Me with Your Words
The revered red-head stood like a statue in his corner of the large room brilliantly lit by an endless number of makeup mirrors, trying to not move for fear of falling and glaring sharp icicles at anyone who dared approach. He hated sharing space. These amateurs didn't deserve to be within a five-metre radius of his dolled-up person, and he would make it his mission to ensure that every last one of them knew it.
Wobbling a little as he momentarily became powerless to the heavy material, Tala popped a cigarette from the coat pocket he'd already unstitched with a pair of nail scissors, under the assumption he'd be taking the coat with him after the show anyway. They couldn't deny him this, especially when the shade of maroon looked this good on him. He coughed and rubbed one of his eyes, using the other hand to light the stick he held between his chapped lips. He ignored the anxious whispers which circled the room with the white wisps of poison, but the familiar clip-clop which now echoed through the room was a sound Tala knew he couldn't pretend not to hear.
'Tala, my god!' came the deep nasal voice which had already inflicted on him a minor headache. 'Put that thing out for heavens sake!'
Tala pointedly stared at her and took in a long, deep inhalation from the cigarette. Without even blinking he stepped further towards his beautician and blew a cloud of white smoke back into her face. She didn't flinch, but when Tala dropped the thing at her feet and trod it into the concrete with his priceless boots, she began to fan the air with her bony, nail-painted fingers. Tala was satisfied. He knew Estella couldn't stand cigarettes, though it wasn't exactly concealed that her youth had revolved around them; clearly resulting in her thin hair and scaly skin, which Tala never bothered to tell her was only elevated with every visit to the tanning booth.
Making overstated coughing sounds which caused the red-head to raise an eyebrow, Estella filled the atmosphere with hairspray and began to check her star over one last time.
'Oh by the way, I have something to show you,' Tala pretended not to hear the whine which hit an ear-splitting note with every word she spoke, and stood still again while she retrieved something from the table behind her. Seeing the day's newspaper brandished before his eyes, Tala adjusted his vision to read the bold print on the front page.
[Hilary accepts invite to the annual Novae Fashion Show]
'Hilary Kinomiya's here?' he managed to choke out, flawless eyes wide with disbelief.
'This is a world famous show, Tala; I don't see why you're so surprised,' Estella responded, dashing about trying to fix every last-minute glitch. 'And take that packet out of the coat pocket, if it were to fall your career would be finished'.
Tala scowled and raised his eyes to the ceiling as he dug his pale stick of an index finger in to fish the cigarette box out. He planted it firmly in the hand of Estella, who looked less than amused. 'Happy?'
Deeming a smile too much for the situation, she gave him a smirk as someone hollered his name in the background. 'Good luck.'
Tala nodded stiffly and turned in the direction the voice had come from, perfecting his walk in clothes he could barely keep himself upright in, never doubting for a moment the luck would be redundant.
xXx
Kai opened the car door a fraction to ensure the coast was clear, before pushing it fully with his left hand and stepping out, jacket in the other. After a subtle nod to his driver, the man ran a hand swiftly through his hair and thanked his blessing there wasn't anybody lurking around. Driving through the back alleys in order to avoid confrontation of any sort was never worthwhile if he then found he wasn't alone.
Flipping his phone open, he quickly sought for a recently added number and ran his other hand though his hair again, all the while ensuring that he wasn't being watched. Entering public buildings was like a secret mission these days; Kai reflected that a man who naturally preferred being left alone should think twice in the future before making a name for himself.
When the phone was answered, he simply stated 'It's me, let me in' by way of a greeting and abruptly snapped it shut, glancing around one last time as he strode to the black door which was already being held open for him by a silhouette against the back of the white brick building in the night sky.
Refusing all assistance and following his instincts when it came to finding his way into the main showroom, Kai marched alone through the empty corridors, slinging on his expensive jacket and smoothing his hair over one last time. Nobody would notice him entering through a different door; in fact they might even expect it.
Having finally found his entrance to the correct room, as predestined Kai slipped through the small crowds of world-class icons and the simply affluent without any disturbance, to his reserved seat right at the front. Promptly interrupting a call on his phone by switching the thing off and flicking it shut, he noticed a mass of deep emerald green take a seat beside him.
'Kai Hiwatari,' the green mass greeted with a warm tone. 'What a nice surprise.'
Kai didn't have to turn his head to realise who was speaking to him. 'Hilary,' he responded, with a small nod and the minutest of smiles which basically consisted of a lip twitch. Sighing with boredom he decided to resume the conversation, just for kicks. 'How's your husband?'
'He's recovering well, thanks. Hopefully he'll be playing again soon,' she smiled at him, but he continued to stare straight ahead, as though hoping to glare a hole in the white silk curtain which hung behind the long platform. The deity had opened her mouth to say something else, but never got the chance as suddenly the bright lights were dimmed and a rather old glamour model stepped up to announce the beginning of the Novae Fashion Show.
For most of the ornate procession Kai sat with his eyes restlessly darting about, a continuous twitch of boredom as every mannequin marched by. His eyes were barely on them at all, and several times he glanced down at his watch. The woman next to him was paying no mind whatsoever though, apparently engrossed in the sequence before her, pen in hand as though she were preparing herself to bid for each one.
He'd barely even noticed the music tempo amplify; the sudden change in lighting hadn't quite reached his attention either. Nothing about the way everybody inched forward in their seats, creating an atmosphere of intensity to be broken any moment. It was only when he turned sharply to send a cold glare towards a photographer did he finally notice him.
For a split second he seemed to forget who or where he was. Feeling his jaw and shoulders drop ever so slightly, and his eyes open wider as though everything below them were sinking, he inched forward with the rest of them for a moment, to get a closer look. And his expression morphed itself into a look of concentration, an attempt to hide the sensation that he might be about to melt.
The man walked with such elegance; such an aura of superiority. It seemed as though nothing would deter his fierce glare from the spot he'd decided to fixate on; no amount of strong wind could knock him from his feet, no matter how slender he was. It appeared his outfit had adjusted itself to suit his walk, his style. And that striking red hair and milk skin was such an unusual combination, particularly with those eyes. Kai could hardly tear his own away from them. They shone out a light of their own, cut through whatever they were directed at. Like staring into precious stones and frozen pools, and yet, as Kai couldn't help but observe when they were directed at him, it seemed they had the ability to freeze everything else. It was undeniable, that when Tala Ivanov had diverted his gaze to stare down straight into his eyes, Kai could feel the cold. It was as though an icicle was sliding its way down his throat, and into his chest.
And that was when he knew. Turquoise was history. Time for a new project. Something that wouldn't be a waste of his time.
xXx
Stuffing the packet into what he'd decided was now his coat, Tala rubbed away at his cheek as he pushed open the heavy door and emerged into the darkness of the night. Removing his hand to search for the lighter, his palm scuffed the material and permanently left a creamy stain of what he'd just wiped from his pale face.
'Fuck,' Tala cursed, making a half-assed attempt at rubbing it off with his thumb, but to no avail. Sighing, he brought the freshly-lit cigarette to his mouth and took a long inhalation of something he badly needed. Who cared if the thing was stained anyway, he could still wear it.
The reverie he'd allowed himself to fall into while watching the smoke encircling the cold night air was abruptly brought to an end when the door was ungraciously pushed open. Jumping in shock, Tala turned to scowl at the person who had followed him and made him flinch…only to find himself gawking a split second later.
The man Tala had recognised from a torn-up newspaper he'd recently seen soaking in filth in a parking lot somewhere, stepped out with a smirk on his face and allowed the door to close behind him with a heavy thud. Tala licked his lips involuntarily as he became very much aware of their proximity. This was ten times more intense than the moment the red-head had recognised him while walking down the runway. No, this time the man was standing less than two metres away, very much in touching range. And Tala's strongest instinct at that moment was admittedly to reach out and grab him.
But he remained composed, or at least somewhat, as Kai cleared his throat and fixated on him through the long strands of blue hair which fell before his deep and entrancing eyes. 'Kai Hiwatari,' he stated bluntly in such a sexy voice Tala felt he must be putting it on. 'I believe we could make a…very fine deal'.
He spoke assuming Tala knew exactly who he was, but the red-head didn't notice this supercilious detail. He was far too caught up in the fact that he'd just realised that Kai Hiwatari wasn't putting on that alluring voice. And having never actually heard the man speak before, Tala wondered how he could have gone this long without it.
Finally regaining his composure, Tala adopted a similar smirk as he casually leant back against the black bars. Kai's lip twitched and Tala felt a surge of confidence. Tala knew how to please, and this man clearly liked what he saw. 'Tala Ivanov,' he remarked 'though I'm sure you know that'.
Kai raised his eyebrows slightly, but decided to humour him. 'I'm not interested in standing around for idle chit-chat, Tala. Can we make a deal or can't we?'
Tala, having almost released the deep moan which formed in his throat when Kai said his name, flicked a strand of hair from his face in a blasé manner and glanced casually back at the man with half-lidded eyes. 'What I ask for is appreciation, though appreciation for my impeccable bedroom skills would never qualify. Those in particular aren't pleasures for the public eye'.
He smirked at Kai's attempt at covering up his surprise at the model's response. And Tala didn't doubt he was surprised; he was no idiot like Kai's other clientele turned out to be. The rumours that encircled this man followed him like a swarm of insects, and Tala certainly believed them to be true, for the most part. He would never put anything past him; he definitely felt he knew what this man was capable of. And more importantly, he had to let Kai know that he wasn't stupid.
Though admittedly, he mused as he watched Kai Hiwatari attempt to control his state of fluster, he stood by what he'd thought when he saw the stern stare bearing into him from the newspaper. He'd bring a lustful glare to that face one day, despite his precaution. And despite his precaution, he knew Kai was thinking the very same thing. After all, this was what sweet dreams were made of. One day, that explosion would be one he could claim.
xXx
Rei squinted to adjust his eyes to the light as he cast them around him. It was so dim he could barely make out the size of the room, much less the colour of the walls. It was certainly nowhere he had been before. Finally glimpsing where the source of light was, he stopped in his tracks at the figure lit perfectly by the soft golden glow on the floor beside him. As far as Rei could tell, other than that the room was completely empty. And in a strange eerie way the thought comforted him greatly. Nothing sumptuous and complicated this time; clearly nobody around to watch. No eyes to spy. At this point, it was the way he wanted it. It was all bare. Even, as Rei noticed with a soft moan, the figure sat in front of him, facing the same way Rei was, still like a beautiful sculpture, and every aspect of his physique illuminated perfectly by the tiny light. So beautiful Rei at first couldn't bring himself to disturb it; the first time ever he had seen Bryan Kuznetsov in this way.
But before long his amber eyes were presented with more. The man sat alone on the stripped floor began to slowly move, breathing heavily and stressing out every motion, as though he hadn't moved in years. He arched his back in a stretch and the watching man behind him could only gaze as he saw the strong muscles in his shoulders contract, and his tail bone lift slightly from the floor. 'Turn around', Rei silently pleaded, 'please turn around and show me more'.
Lowering his arms slowly, he turned his head towards the light, illuminating his every stoic feature, every harsh shadow. Rei licked his lower lip as the eyes made golden stared at him, as though to penetrate. And boy, did it work. Feeling his chest contract, he took a step forwards, eyes hungry with so much more than lust.
Bryan smirked at him, but didn't turn around. He continued to look over his shoulder, creating a soft golden halo around his profile which stood out amidst the darkness. It almost felt as though the rest of the room had melted away. The smirk made Rei gulp, and Bryan clearly saw this. Releasing a small chuckle, he growled in his deep tone 'think you can handle this, Kon?'
Without waiting for a response (which Rei had no idea of how to make anyway), Bryan turned back to face the wall, and for a second Rei could only see his back and shimmering hair. But as the golden eyes began to travel down his flawless build, Bryan let himself fall backwards until he was completely laid down on the floor, and tilted his head back so that Rei could see his satisfied smirk upside-down. His expression and position had 'come and get me' written all over it, and Rei was just about ready to follow the command. There he was, in all his glory, exactly as Rei had imagined him before, many many times.
His eyes still locked on Rei's, Bryan assiduously slid one hand down his own chest, lips twitching at the touch of the skin gliding over him, down to his abdomen and lower still. Rei's jaw dropped and his eyes widened as Bryan began to pump at himself, increasing the pressure slightly with every slow movement until his eyes began to glaze. The man still standing began to feel himself get hard, as Bryan's chest began to heave and he screwed up his eyes, lip twitching in time with the pumps which were becoming increasingly faster. Rei could not break his gaze. That hand, that working hand, it set off fireworks in his mind whenever it appeared. And the other began to rise, brought to Bryan's lips as he bit hard against the skin to stop himself from crying out.
Finally Rei felt his knees weaken as Bryan released a low growl of pleasure, jolting his crotch to the ceiling as the hot white fluid poured out from him like a torrent. He lay back against the cold floor once again, and as a bead of sweat trickled down the side of his neck, a similar bead of saliva made its way down Rei's chin. But a second later, the heavy breathing stopped, and Bryan once again tilted his head so Rei could see his upside-down leer. 'What are you waiting for?' he murmured.
Rei cautiously stepped over to him, as any mere mortal might who was stepping towards a god. But when he got close enough to have a proper view, he found himself unable to move again. This was too intense even for his imagination to handle; he could do no more than he would in real life. Bryan's sturdy body stared back at him, enticing him nearer, inviting his touch, but to no avail. Bryan sat up and moved so that he was kneeling right in front of Rei. He smirked again 'scared, are we?' Despite the condescending tone, it was said in such a sexy voice that Rei didn't even care. 'Well don't worry, Kon. I'll warm you up'.
He began to undo Rei's jeans, those hands working so close to Rei's crotch he could feel himself heating up already. Once his jeans were at their feet, instead of removing the final layer of clothing, Bryan instead took Rei's shaft in his hand, and began to rub it through the material. Rei moaned at the sensation, his reaction bringing the smirk back to Bryan's lips. This was what those hands were really made for…
Before Rei could get too excited, the hands abruptly stopped. The golden eyes narrowed as Rei opened his mouth to complain, but Bryan was already taking hold of the waist band of Rei's boxers. Slowly pulling them down, Rei felt a terrifying, yet thrilling sense of vulnerability, and found he was powerless to do anything, not that he would ever want to. He could feel the cold air on him, and nothing stimulated him more than that feeling of exposure.
A hiss escaped through his gritted teeth as he felt Bryan's warm tongue slide around the tip of his penis. Rei strained his neck and threw his head back, digging his finger tips into Bryan's sturdy shoulders as the robust man's tongue flicked across the sensitive surface of his skin. It had been far too long since such actions had given him such pleasure in real life, and yet even what Kai Hiwatari had once done to him paled in comparison to this. Most definitely too good to be true.
Just as Rei felt he was getting close to his climax, again the source of his pleasure abruptly stopped. But this time he couldn't even react before, without warning, Bryan's hands grasped a firm grip on his buttocks, and he took Rei's entire length inside his mouth. Rei cried out in shock, and gripped Bryan's hair as he felt the blissful warmth, working together with the sliding tongue to give him almost unimaginable pleasure. It wasn't long before it all became too much, and with a hoarse moan Rei bucked as he felt his own fluids rush out of him. Bryan, who had moved away just in time, remained on his knees but slid his hands up and down Rei's thighs, pulling him closer simultaneously. 'I'm not done with you yet,' he whispered in a husky voice.
Rei smirked this time at the younger man's vivacity, enjoying the tingle of Bryan's fingers gently touching him just below the rear. Any minute now would be the moment Rei had been waiting for since the beginning of this little fantasy. As he continued to slowly step towards Bryan, he saw the man lay down in front of him, still pulling at him all the while to follow. Rei willingly did as he was silently commanded, slowly leaning until he hovered about a foot above the man on the cold bare floor, holding his weight with the muscles in his arms. Bryan smiled and began to rise his upper body, slowly leaning towards him with that trademark smirk forming once again. When he had reached high enough to have his lips level with Rei's ear, he whispered 'I don't play submissive'.
Before Rei could even react, he was suddenly seized by both arms and flung almost violently to the floor. Bryan was on top of him, and their positions had switched before Rei could even comprehend what was happening. The feeling of shock melted away as his expression relaxed. Bryan was positively leering over him.
A few lasting seconds of tense waiting, before Bryan swooped in for his catch. A moment or two to stare intently, before Rei's head shot up and his chest expanded. The moments were over in a flash, as Rei felt Bryan enter him.
'Excuse me, sir?'
It was forceful, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Rei would have it no other way. That drive of power was everything he wanted.
'Mmhm…'
That surge…the unbelievable pleasure with every thrust Bryan made...
'Erm, sir?'
'Oh,' Rei started, blinking for a few seconds and staring up, rather startled, into the face of the woman looking down at him. 'sorry…' he muttered stupidly, trying to gather his wits.
'Sir, you've been sitting here for a little while now, are you sure you won't order something?' the waitress said politely.
Leaning slightly to the left to look past her wide-set hips, Rei smiled lightly as he caught sight of the man entering through the glass doors. Relaxing slightly, and rubbing his eye he responded, 'Alright, we'll see the menu now please'.
She scuttled away and in her place stepped the heavy boots of the very person Rei had been waiting for. Having been rather awe-struck on previous days of appointed meeting, he now found himself quite composed and able to greet him 'your timing is more impeccable than usual' without even looking up at him.
Bryan chuckled in a good-natured manner, 'Gathering up the nerves to sass me are we, Kon? I guess I should start re-thinking my image'.
They shared a smile, and Rei glanced down at his menu. A few seconds following Bryan finally did the same. Lazily flicking the thing down onto the table again, Bryan planted his elbow beside it and rested his jaw bone on his clenched fist. 'So how's the wife?' he asked in a pleasant tone, an ironic smile gracing his features.
Rei bit his lower lip and continued moving his eyes swiftly over his menu. 'She's fine,' he answered vaguely. Then, realising it would be polite to return the inquiry, no matter how little he wanted to, he lifted his eyes without moving anything else and stiffly asked, 'how's Kingston?'
Bryan raised an eyebrow at the use of his lover's last name, but didn't voice his curiosity. 'Well.' he stated, managing an even more concise response than Rei had about Mariah. 'Nice shades, by the way' he drawled casually, casting his eyes idly around the room and checking to make sure nobody was looking at him in much the same manner.
'Thanks,' Rei smiled out one side of his mouth, pushing his aviators up a little higher with his index finger. 'And your disguise isn't half bad either' he finished sarcastically.
Bryan scoffed and murmured 'I'm not wearing one,' though they both knew he'd shared the joke. As though finally getting impatient with idle small-talk, he finally stared square into the half-shaded eyes of the man sitting opposite. 'So how's the Stroblitz gig coming?'
Rei subtly gulped and lifted his hand to scratch around his neck. 'It's…I'm working on it,' he said awkwardly, hoping Bryan wouldn't inquire into the process too much. It wasn't as though Rei had been lying about his abilities to get Bryan what he wanted…he just wanted to stretch it out a little longer.
Luckily for him, Bryan could care less about questioning details. 'Alright then,' he smiled smugly. 'I'll let you do your thing, and you keep kindly doting on an idiot and his needs.'
Rei laughed, perhaps a little too loudly, and attempted to cover it up with an exaggerated cough, which just proved to be a little too much and he ended up feeling quite foolish. Finally composing himself, he broke the little awkward silence which had followed his one-man performance with a light smile, 'The idiot will have his gig. And any amount of time he needs to pay back the money I supply him with'.
'Nothing but a vicious circle, Bryan Kuznetsov,' Rei's thoughts told him. 'An idiot dependent of an even bigger idiot…and nothing to possibly end it but pain. And yet, I still press on…'
xXx
'…and though perhaps we have Kai Hiwatari to thank for the success, one thing is clear; Tala Ivanov is a superstar destined to shine.'
'Hm?' Tala initially turned back towards the television frowning as though the woman speaking had done him an injury. But when he caught sight of his own beautiful face flashing across the screen amongst various type-faces for the best-selling magazines, his expression softened and perhaps he managed a small smile. It was difficult to tell whether Tala was smiling or not these days.
'…it sure isn't going to be difficult finding suitable Christmas presents this year, ladies. Tala's book has returned to the shelves of all major book stores and already has been declared a best-seller, as well as-'
Tala jabbed at the power button on the remote control, cutting off the woman in the middle of her excited oration. Why the fuck they were interested in Christmas was beyond Tala's logic; the holiday was still two months away. Shaking his head and releasing a loud sigh, Tala carelessly threw the control back on to the couch (though it missed by inches and landed on the floor with a thud). Hearing that his book was once again selling…no, hearing his book was selling, full stop, he knew he ought to be thrilled, or even slightly contented at the very least. And if not that, the fact that he was on a number of magazine covers that could match Tyson Kinomiya was surely enough to make him glow with pride? For the public, perhaps. For himself, he simply couldn't find the energy.
Ignoring the great urge he had to stretch, Tala finally moved his feet from the spot by the rattling window they'd been glued to for at least the past two hours, and made his way towards the bedroom for a cigarette. All the while he took great comfort -though he didn't really show it- in the fact that he wasn't under a strict schedule; he had nowhere to be in the next few minutes; he wasn't stuck in a room that didn't belong to him with a load of other temperamental divas. No, this time Tala had some time to think; a chance to smoke without sensing he was about to be scolded for it. This was his space this time.
His apartment was so far from anything special, no member of the general public would ever believe it belonged to someone so fabulous. And that's exactly why Tala liked it. They had always told him he could afford so much better, but to be frank he simply didn't care. What excitement could ever be had in the luxurious suburbs? Besides, he'd lived there far too long to abandon the place now. Since stepping out of that god-awful orphanage this had been his home, and in his mind it made no sense to leave it. They always told Tala he grew attached to things too easily, and he would usually respond by somehow making himself rid of them.
He stepped into the room where the curtains were still half closed, and the bed half made, and walked over to the cigarette box on the bedside table, where below it a drawer lay half open. Avoiding the mirror at all costs, he retrieved the lighter from the drawer and sat down on the bed for the first inhalation. And like a dying diabetic inhaling sugar, it restored him for the little while he would need to carry on, until the next time.
Returning the lighter to the drawer, he dug his hand into it and rummaged around for a couple of seconds, leaving it in its position as though opening it further would break it. Finally finding what he was searching for, he drew his hand out with a pharmacy plastic bag, and a brown paper one. Placing the brown one on the sheets beside him, he temporarily placed the cigarette in the nearby ash tray and retrieved the first rattling container from the plastic bag. Squinting to read the tiny print on the side and coming out unsuccessful from impatience, he shook his head and dropped six of the oval pills into his palm. Dry-swallowing them all at once, he returned the bag to the drawer and picked up the one beside him. It made a rustling noise as his stick fingers poked around in a desperate search, before drawing out a clear zip-lock bag which was almost completely empty save for a few specks of white dust.
'Fuck, fuck, fuck…' Tala groaned in despair. He'd run out.
Sniffing indignantly and retuning the bag to the drawer, he dragged himself up again and took his cigarette back to the living room. Tala had been taking an awful lot lately, and the fact that he'd been taken under the wing of Kai Hot-Sex-On-Legs Hiwatari didn't do an awful lot to improve his conditions; much to his disappointment. Perhaps it was the lack of sex. But he knew one thing for certain; he was cracking up. No matter how much he tried to disguise it, he couldn't deny it any longer. Determined to believe he wasn't beyond help, he had managed to obtain a load anti-depression pills, as well as the usual amount for his dodgy sleeping patterns when he had shoots at all hours of the night and day. But the present-day Tala looked back on that tiny ray of determination with pride; that ship had pretty much sailed. The sleeping pills had never worked wonders for him anyway, and the anti-depressants only made him worse. But with every meal reappearing minutes after forced consumption back the same way it went down, he was relieved to have something that would stay put after he swallowed it.
But it wasn't really until Kai'd come along that he had resorted to actually obtaining illegal drugs. The stress of keeping up that façade, along with the sexual tension which came with it, was too exhausting for Tala to cope with on his own. If he could see himself now, five years ago, he'd commit suicide, and he knew it. It was so easy to promise fame wouldn't get to you, but Tala believed that until actually lived, fame and all assumptions associated with it were dreams for those who didn't ever want to wake up.
A blazing ring which Tala swore was louder than usual pierced the silence and made him jump. Tossing the half-finished cigarette out of the window he had to make a real effort to pull open, he was vaguely suspicious as he slowly dragged his feet towards the door, from which another awful ring was sounding.
The person on the other side of his door surprised him even more than the original ring. Terribly thankful he tossed the elixir of life into the cold air outside, he found himself unsure what to say, as he stepped to the side to let her in.
'What are you doing here?' he softly croaked after a couple of minutes. She hadn't taken her eyes from him from the moment she'd seen him, and her expression much mirrored his, though he was certain she had known who she was expecting to be behind the door.
'I, um,' she said awkwardly. 'I came to say goodbye, Tala. I suspected we'd all been let go, but…well I didn't hear the news until today, so…'
For a moment, Tala felt a small pang of sympathy for her. Without changing his expression, he nodded and inquired 'what will you do?'
'Oh,' Estella replied in a tone that matched Tala's mood. 'I'll find other clients to look after.' She took a long look at him, as though breathing in every detail like Tala did his nicotine. And with every second her eyes were on him, they drooped and her skin became ever so slightly paler. Tala became irritated and uncomfortable, but just as he was about to say something, she whispered hoarsely 'Tala…my god, you…you look so sick.'
Tala frowned; he was certainly not in the mood for this. Estella looked positively horrified and it certainly did neither of them any good for her to point out what they both already knew. Nothing had reinstated his decision so clearly; it was time to let them go. It had been long enough.
'What have you done to yourself?' she spoke out in despair. 'Tala I have never seen anything more horrifying! Even your beautiful eyes are dull and shady. Is that Hiwatari encouraging this? Tala, please listen to me, you have to stop doing this! I can't bear to see you this way! How did you ever become so thin?-'
'That's enough, Estella.'
'It's like looking at a skeleton! Can't you-'
'Estella, I said that's enough.'
'-even hold down food anymore, or have you given up on eating altogether?'
Tala made a move before she could even open her mouth to get the next accusation out. As he advanced she fought herself not to scream, but he didn't touch her. He just stood over her, finally an identifiable emotion flashing through his dull eyes.
'Get out.' He barely whispered it, but he knew she had heard. Lip quivering violently, Estella said not another word, as she slowly backed out the door. She still never took his eyes off him, and Tala would never forget the last he saw of the woman who he'd once relied on; the look of pure terror, like the expression of someone come face-to-face with their worst nightmare. Even then he knew it would never leave him completely.
Shutting the door she'd left open, he almost made a beeline to the phone, his anger spurring him on all the while. It rang a couple of times before the very familiar smooth voice casually met Tala's ear.
'Hello, Kai Hiwatari speaking…'
'You might have told her, you bastard!'
Tala could almost hear the irresistible smirk on the other end, 'Ah, Tala. My favourite officious client.'
The red-head rolled his eyes and tried with all his might to prevent the automatic smile from gracing his features with the sound of the man's voice. 'Why didn't you tell her?'
Kai audibly sighed. 'Who, Tala?' he asked as though trying to humour an irrational four-year-old.
'Estella, and…and the rest of them,' Tala snapped indignantly. 'Why didn't you tell them they'd been let go?'
Kai made an impatient 'hm' noise, clearly stating he was getting tired of the conversation. He briefly said 'it's not up to me to carry out such tasks,' before bringing it to a firm close by changing the subject entirely. 'And by the way, don't think you have the authority to call me a bastard just because we're working in close proximity now.'
Tala raised an eyebrow, though he knew nobody could see him. 'I'll call you what you deserve to be called,' he smirked, knowing he was taking a gamble.
'Well if you insist on acting that way, I'm well entitled to punish you the way you deserve to be punished,' he smoothly responded.
'Hm, that sounds exciting, but let's make sure it doesn't dampen our reputations.' So far from angry, Tala was almost smiling now.
There was a chuckle on the other line, 'Tala, what could we possibly not get away with?'
He believed it to be a rhetorical question, but Tala knew where this conversation was going nonetheless. Feeling his energy supply for the day fast diminishing, he too let out a low chuckle and croaked out 'well, these phone bills don't pay for themselves…'
Kai, whose phone bills very possibly did pay for themselves, smirked one more time and muttered in his deep and sexy voice 'well alright, I look forward to the next tantrum.'
It was now Tala's turn to 'hm' indignantly. 'I'm hanging up now, you bastard.'
'I'll remember you said that,' came the final swift response. Tala found the energy to release one last smile, before returning the phone to its receiver and dragging himself back into the depths of his room, rubbing his tired eyes all the while, in search of another cigarette.
xXx
There was a knock at the door, and from the other side a faint voice could be heard saying 'Mr. Tate?'
Max quickly exited the pacman window on his computer, and opened up something at random that might look important. 'Yes?' he called out to the person at the door, not looking up as the man entered.
'Sir, we have a request court-case we believe you may be interested in.'
Finally tearing his eyes from the screen, Max lifted his head to face the man standing before him, looking mildly interested. 'Oh really? Well, I'm all ears…'
The man nodded and flicked through the papers in his hands, before handing them over to the lawyer, who also flicked through them as the man spoke, nodding every so often. 'The court case concerns that young singer girl, Ming-Ming. She's trying to win a case against Kai Hiwatari, who she claims has been the inflictor of sexual assault.' He paused in thought for a moment. 'Apparently it was quite explicit, if I remember rightly…'
Max gave a final nod, now reading certain paragraphs of the claim in more depth. 'Well, I certainly don't doubt this girl is telling the truth, and on top of that I'm not surprised about the entire ordeal. We all know what Kai Hiwatari can get up to,' he said, speaking as though the lawyer and renowned sex-addict were great friends. But in fairness, he wasn't the only one who spoke of Kai in such ways. It was suspected by almost everyone that the stories which spread about him were true. Max personally felt it was a wonder that nobody had tried to put at end to it yet, or at least question him. But the man never was very good at letting information slip in responses…or giving responses, for that matter.
Max sat back in his chair a little and gave it a bit of thought. If he accepted the case and became the plaintiff's lawyer he would be up against a very powerful man. He was certainly not above bribery and perhaps even blackmail, or so Max suspected. But at that point, the more pressing issues seemed to out-weigh that detail. Kai Hiwatari was a widely-criticized individual, for one with such an influence. He was the man the nation loved to hate; his power came from their passionate loathing, which only made everything worse for others, and better for him. Max knew that by assisting in this case, he could not only increase his already out-standing reputation, but it was very likely that he and Ming-Ming could win. After all, he doubted there was a single person who would believe that Kai hadn't committed this crime. It simply wasn't probable, not for him.
Giving his employee a decisive smile, Max placed the papers neatly on his desk and firmly stated 'you can give my consent; I have agreed to be Ming-Ming's lawyer for the case. Please have my secretary arrange a time with the girl, and I'll definitely do my best to get this situation sorted out for her.'
xXx
It wasn't as though the thoughts were new; it was simply the fact that they'd finally forced their way through the barrier. Like a beaten toy, done for but still dragged around, used for the entertainment of others, and falling to pieces sooner than it should be. Sealed in protective glass, that toy might have survived the way it should. But allowed to be played with, and left outside in the dirt and rain of an abandoned garden no one cared for, he was broken. Tearing up once again; it wasn't as though it hadn't been aware, it was just the protection wearing off. The barrier had been broken through, and the stitches had unwound.
The change seemed so sudden, though without much awareness it had been gradually occurring for a long time. Everybody told him the same thing; he had never truly listened to any of them. The one person who mattered had stayed conveniently silent, and that was that. So easy to just pretend everything was fine; it was all better this way. Perhaps he could be seventeen and fabulous again, perhaps he could be truly alive.
But all that had ended in the count of half a second. One defining glance at the reflection he was avoiding. That was all it took, and now Tala Ivanov was sitting by himself in the dark.
A mixture of terror and pain had encircled his body and mind as it finally clicked that everything they told him was the truth. His skin shade really was unnatural; he really was becoming dangerously skeletal. Being a new inspiration was taking its toll on him, and the critics would for ever be harassing him for pushing too far over the edge. Mistakes could be made that he couldn't reverse, fragile lives very easily ruined. None of it intentional, entirely his fault. And they would never let him forget it. It seemed their words had finally got to him.
So now he sat, curled up in the bathtub. His cigarettes surrounded him, and on the bathroom floor spilled out the pills he'd just overdosed on again. But he couldn't see them; he couldn't see anything. He'd chosen the one room where the natural light couldn't find him, and cut the artificial light to avoid the ominous mirror, and any attempt at ever seeing himself again. He had no idea how long he had sat there without moving. His only indication of night falling was the obvious change in temperature. He shivered violently as his hands wrapped themselves around his emaciated figure, covered in bruises he didn't know he had before.
It wasn't as though he didn't know the imperfections. He just hadn't allowed himself to see them before. He knew about the bags under his eyes, the occasional skin imperfections from constant smoking. What he didn't remember from before was that deep shadow which cast itself below the bags, the harsh dents which had appeared below his cheekbones, and the once-glowing orbs of topaz, which really had morphed into dull pools of grey. He didn't remember himself being this way. The magazine images were all he'd seen lately; and he looked beautiful then. Catching sight of himself was the wakeup call he'd hoped would never come. And for a while he didn't believe it to really be him. It was…ugly…so ugly. He couldn't be ugly. He was Tala Ivanov; he was beautiful. The magazines said so.
Though this consideration did nothing to make him feel better, and only resulted in Tala sitting by himself in the bathtub in the dark, caked in concealer and blinking through his own lashes, made heavy with too much mascara. Dolled-up like a cheap whore, Tala the beaten toy sat alone in his abandoned garden, waiting for someone to find him and stitch him back up.
Even if he had been listening for them, he wouldn't have heard the feet on the stairs.
xXx
Kai smirked to himself as he twirled his key ring around his right index finger. Walking down the hall he now knew rather well, his expensive shoes scuffed the tattered carpet as his tongue ran itself over his top layer of teeth. This was essentially a surprise visit, but Kai was good at this sort of thing. He'd always had a gift when it came to knowing where people were without stalking. He would be in tonight, and Kai was looking forward to the reaction when he saw the enigma outside his door.
'Yes,' Kai thought to himself, as he approached the green door, identical to the rest except for the brass number. 'I've waited long enough for this already.'
He found the correct key and turned it in the lock, pausing before opening the door to run a hand through his flawless hair. Clearing his throat and adopting another smirk, he pushed the door open and let himself in, closing it softly behind him.
It at first occurred to him that his instincts may have been wrong. Frowning, he stepped further in and opened his mouth to call out his name. He paused before any sound escaped his lips. Mouth still open, he flicked on the light and could only stare at the space around him.
Never had he seen it look such a mess. Magazines littered the floor, covering the spaces of carpet that weren't already hidden beneath the contents flung from every drawer. But this was no regular slop, and looking at it made Kai stop in his tracks. His pulse had suddenly increased. For the first time since he could remember, he was genuinely worried. The delicate curtain rail was lying below one of the windows, having been yanked far too hard and collapsed. The chair was moved at least four feet from where it originally had been, as though someone had tried to drag it but given up. The drawers had all been opened and by the looks of it, completely emptied. Glasses lay smashed on the countertops and what Kai hoped was wine had left a deep stain in the carpet. Even the glass coffee table lay in pieces, the mirror which had once hung proudly on the wall amidst the broken glass, showing pieces of Kai's reflection from where it had shattered.
Narrowing his eyes and trying to remain controlled, though he could still feel his heart pounding, Kai cautiously stepped through the wreckage and kept his eyes open for anything suspicious. Listening intently and picking up on not the slightest sound, he relaxed his shoulders a little and gulped, before warily speaking out.
'Tala?' he almost winced as he heard his voice, speaking out and breaking the silence for the first time in god-knows-how-long.
A stifled murmur caught his attention. It was so soft anybody else probably would have missed it, but Kai's sense of hearing and determination even heard it through the pounding he could now feel in his ears. Whipping his head around so fast his vision blurred for a moment, he stayed stock still and stared pointedly at the handle of the bathroom door. After debating for a moment whether he'd been imagining it, he exhaled a breath he didn't realise he'd been holding, and reached for the handle.
When he opened that door, and flicked on that light, Kai was met with a sight he'd never be able to let go of.
'Tala!' he gasped out breathlessly. Despite the sudden rush of luminosity, the pale, shivering red-head didn't even move an inch. Kai's eyes widened at the display before him; it was nothing he'd ever expected to see from someone who'd always seemed so supercilious. This, he concluded, was almost worse than the fear that had encircled him before he knew where Tala was.
Without second thought, he was at the red-head's side in half a second, though Tala didn't divert his stare from the tiles straight ahead. Watching him still hold himself tightly, Kai couldn't tell if he was making a point of not looking up at him, or if it was even possible he hadn't noticed Kai come in. Perhaps there was something seriously wrong with him.
Swallowing and gathering his wits, Kai bent down and scooped Tala up in his arms. Half relieved and half dreadfully surprised, Kai found that he barely weighed a thing. Tala allowed himself to be lifted, still staring ahead through half-lidded, misty eyes at absolutely nothing. He was limp in Kai's firm hold, and it was so pathetically unlike him that Kai wanted to shake him, desperately force out of him some form of resistance. But, none came, and Kai carried Tala to his room, where he placed him gently on the bed.
Tala finally looked up at him, curling himself slowly into a ball and wrapping his frail arms around his chest, as though forming some sort of pitifully weak protection. For the first time in what seemed like years, he found the will to speak. Opening his mouth he croaked out 'y-you're not going to…?'
'Tala,' Kai whispered gently, looking slightly offended amidst the anxiety. 'What the hell makes you think I would?'
Tala didn't say anything else. Allowing his head to flop to one side down on the cold pillow, his eyes began to drift shut but his body continued to tremble. Kai shook out the blanket at the foot of the bed and draped it over him, before walking to the other side and placing himself down beside the red-head. He glanced over with uncertainty, but Tala didn't move. Kai saw this as a good sign, and lay his own head down on the mattress, staring up at the ceiling knowing he could never bring himself to fall asleep, his thoughts so far from where they'd been when he had first set out to Tala's apartment.
(A/N): I loved writing this chapter; mainly because it was full of Tala and his scenes are my favourite :).
So who caught the unimportant minor piece of information I snuck in during Rei's daydream? XD Unimportant for this story now…but in his past it could have initiated something…hmm? Don't worry if you don't understand =P it really isn't important.
Oh, one more thing, what the hell is Brooklyn's last name? I've been using Kingston, but it says Masefield on Wikipedia, but everyone uses Kingston! I wonder if this is something an author made up one day and it turned into this massive Kingston myth, like the one where Tyson's father is called Bruce…And by the way, yes…yes I did go on Wikipedia to find Brooklyn's last name…
Review pleasums!
