Hello all! On with the next chapter! I hope you all enjoy, and I apologize for the wait!
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I'm Not Weak
Chapter 3: Finally Moving Forward
Infinite hadn't spoken about his nightmares in three days. In fact, once again, he was avoiding conversation with Rookie altogether. Things were getting very, very awkward.
Rookie had tried, mind you. After the first night, he thought there was a small chance Infinite would open up to him, get him to understand. But just like a light switch, the jackal reverted back to his shell, and getting him out this time was going to be WAY harder.
Rookie tried to coax Infinite to at least explain his nightmares. The last time that happened... Rookie rubbed his cheek as the not so pleasant memory came back. Infinite slugged him, a bit hard for a creature still recovering from his type of injuries, after the two got into... something resembling an argument. Since then, Infinite hid in the room and made no attempt to get himself out.
The wolf knew Infinite wasn't sleeping at all. He barely ate or drank, just spent most of the time outside the hideaway under a large tree, avoiding him. Wasting himself away to nothing.
It hurt his heart, but... Rookie was beginning to wonder if he'd actually made the right choice saving the jackal.
What was he doing wrong? Why wouldn't Infinite talk to him?
One evening, Rookie worked on making dinner- quesadillas. He'd taken a fond liking to the recipe after the war ended, and Silver made them as part of the celebratory festivities. Long story short, he loved them, and after asking, watching the hedgehog, and a lot of errors, he'd finally perfected it.
His face fell slightly as he realized he'd probably be eating alone again tonight. 'But what can I do... I guess he needs his space...'
Rookie shook his head and finished making dinner. 'Non of this would be easy for him, but... I wish he would talk to me. I don't understand why he's holding back from me...' As he made Infinite's plate, he heard a shuffle behind him, but paid it no mind. He figured Infinite would go to his room, lock himself in, and that was that.
'I guess... maybe I'm to blame. He probably thinks he's in hell someplace, paying for what he's done. I don't... I guess I'll never know.'
Rookie let out a small sigh. It was no use thinking about it when he had to control over him. For now, he would give Infinite his space, and hope he would eventually come around. Instead, he focused at his task at hand- finishing up dinner. He whistled a light tune, wrapping up the jackal's plate, then putting it to the side and working on his own. A grin stretched across his face as he toasted his tortilla.
'I really need to lay off eating these...'
Infinite knew he should've said something. He owed that child his life, and all he was doing was avoiding. Avoiding the conversation he knew would come, avoiding him entirely. He felt horrible for punching the child when he'd asked about his nightmares. All he wanted to do was help!
The jackal shivered under the very thick blanket as he curled his tail about himself and rested his chin on top of his knees, guilt eating away at him even more. This was hard... all of this. It was so much easier being a villain, being a murderer, because he didn't have to feel so many emotions at one time. The Phantom Ruby controlled him like a puppet, and he dumbly ignored everything that didn'y fit his ideal world... a world with only him in it.
But then, what was the point of all that? Losing his friends? Having people wanting him to suffer and die? Being saved by the very creature whose life he ruined, and act like everything was okay?!
"Was I... actually worth all this?" he muttered to himself. He listened as Rookie moved about in the kitchen downstairs, and his nose caught a whiff of whatever it was he was cooking. Infinite finally heard his stomach rumbling, and his cheeks flushed red. He was so glad Rookie couldn't hear that!
He knew he was hungry. Hell, he hadn't eaten in going on four days, and thirsty was an understatement with how he felt. But going downstairs, seeing that wolf... he couldn't. He'd live if he didn't eat...again. He didn't deserve it.
He didn't deserve this child saving his life.
A small knock at the door nearly caused Infinite to let out a shriek, and he was brought back to reality. His hand gripped at his chest as he tried to get a grip on his breathing and heart.
He heard the knock again, a bit lighter this time. Infinite looked at his hands. They were trembling, and bad. He was starting to see double, and he had been feeling lightheaded for a few days.
He was wasting himself away. He couldn't avoid Rookie forever, and it was time he faced the music. Struggling to stand on his legs, he staggered slowly towards the door, each step he took feeling like he was made of lead. His head was beginning to hurt, and he wanted to pass out, but he couldn't.
He needed to face Rookie and at least try to make things right.
When Infinite finally reached the door, he gripped the knob, took a deep breath to steady himself, and slowly opened the door.
Rookie was honestly thrown off guard when Infinite opened the door. It was enough to let him in, but Infinite made a point not to let himself be seen. Rookie swallowed back his nervousness, hoping there wasn't a fist ready behind the door, and carefully stepped in with two plates.
Infinite was hungry and tired. Rookie could see he was. The jackal was struggling to stand upright, his breathing was harsh, and he was gripping the doorknob way tighter than he needed to. He also wouldn't face him, keeping his back towards him. Rookie let out a silent sigh, sat the food down on the desk, and walked towards Infinite, fed up.
He rested a hand on Infinite's shoulder. Said jackal tensed up, but Rookie ignored it. He wasn't exactly sure what he was trying to do, but he needed to do something!
Infinite was hurting, someplace that Rookie wasn't sure he could begin to reach. And he was holding onto it, burying himself in it. It was going to cost him if Rookie didn't stand strong and hold him up until he could walk again on his own. He just wanted to understand his newfound friend.
Infinite the Jackal wasn't a bad being, and Rookie wouldn't be convinced otherwise.
Gently, Rookie pried Infinite's hand from the doorknob and pushed the door closed. Infinite's breathing began to pick up even more, and he swore he saw three Rookie faced dancing in front of him. All the fatigue from the last few days finally caught up to him.
"W-Wha... why... why are you doing this..." he barely managed to get out before his legs gave in. He collapsed into Rookie's arms, exhausted from lack of sleep and not eating. Rookie carefully navigated Infinite back to his bed, and managed to get the jackal- and all his heavy fur- on the bed and covered up. He retrieved his phone, then came back to a barely conscious jackal trying to have a conversation.
"I... I sor'y... I..." Infinite was barely getting out words that made sense. Rookie smiled lightly and patted his hand. He then typed something and held the screen to Infinite.
'Just sleep, Infinite. I'll be right here if you need me.'
Infinite eyes closed as he trailed off into something of a peaceful rest. Rookie noticed the bags that were beginning to form from his lack of sleep, and since he knew he wouldn't have to worry, he pulled back Infinite's covers to get a better look at him.
Rookie's eyes widened. He knew Infinite was supposed to have some form of muscle on him from all his years of fighting and running, but he was starting to look thin and sick. His fur was turning a nasty ashen grey color, and Rookie knew that jackal hadn't bothered to shower either. His white fur and the tips of his tail looked off color, too.
'When you wake up... you have to eat and you need to shower.' Rookie told himself as he watched Infinite sleep like a rock. He looked at the dinner plates still sitting on the desk and chuckled to himself. It was late, but Rookie couldn't go to sleep knowing Infinite was still in a messed up state.
'Kinda knew he wouldn't eat, but... rest is a good place to start. When he wakes up, I'll get him in the shower. He's not like Sonic- I know he's not afraid of water. He's starting to smell, though.'
Rookie found his fingers gently making their way into his matted, dirty hair, and he began the process of trying to detangle a jackal's fur... without waking him. As he did, he drifted into thoughts about his new roommate.
'Poor guy... he must feel so alone. I guess I can say I know the feeling... but it's not fair. No one should have to suffer like that! It was Eggman's fault he ever found the stupid ruby in the first place!'
Infinite stirred slightly, then was still. Rookie looked at him, gauging his awareness, before deciding he was still good to continue to detangle Infinite's fur. 'The worst part... is that I know I should hate him, and I should've left him for dead when I went back there. But what good would that do?'
Rookie finally gave up, and got off the bed to stretch his legs. He then walked out to run some bath water. 'This is really frustrating... I wonder if I was like this back when I was working with the Resistance...'
He stared at the water as the tub filled and sighed. 'It must be hard for him. He doesn't have his team anymore, and his family... I wonder if they know where he is. I've never heard him mention his mom or dad, not one time. I wonder if... he...'
Rookie shuddered and stopped his thoughts, turning off the running water and grabbing a washcloth and towels for him. 'It doesn't matter. That's not him anymore! It's not him... but I... I wish he'd see it, too...'
Rookie realized what he told him that night- that everyone deserved a second chance, that he was a good person- was true. He felt it. He saw it. Infinite wasn't a bad guy, just heavily misguided.
The challenge? Showing it to not just Infinite himself, but to a group of people who wanted that jackal dead, and getting them to believe what he did.
Infinite's eyes opened groggily. His fur felt... heavy. And really, really... wet? Was he damp? Was he drowning?!
No, his brain quickly realized. He could breathe, and he didn't have a salty taste in his mouth like he did in his nightmares.
Then... where was he?
He looked around. The room looked different, he noticed. It wasn't his bedroom anymore.
This one, it was a lot brighter, and with strange designs on the walls... wait. Was he dreaming again? Was this a nightmare? Some strange form of torture, perhaps?
'I wonder where I am this time... if that blue hedgehog decided to do this...' As he soaked in the water, he started to calm himself down. This didn't feel like a nightmare... in fact, it felt... good. When was the last time he enjoyed sitting in a pool of water?
And the smell... it didn't smell like blood and death. No, it smelled like... flowers? Something sweet? It smelled really, really, good, and it brought back times of the rare moments he and his mom would often bathe together when he was still a small jackal pup... his mom running her gentle fingers through his very thick fur...
Suddenly, it hit him. That was why he didn't feel panic. That was why that memory of his mother came back to him.
Infinite was in a bathroom. In a bathtub full of water. Next to a stranger. Naked, more or less.
He was vulnerable.
Infinite jumped up, sending water all over the place, and all over his child savior. Rookie was caught of guard- he'd been sitting on the toilet, his back turned away from Infinite to give him some privacy. His eyes were on his phone, playing a mobile game to keep him busy before he would have to change out the bathwater for the third time.
Until he was met with a huge splash of water. Turning around, he saw one sopping wet and very pissed off jackal standing in the bathtub. Rookie sat his phone on the towel, which he thankfully sat on top of a closed hamper, which was near the bathroom door. 'Yeesh! If I had known that would happen, I would've brought a protective case too!'
"How... dare YOU!" Infinite roared out, shaking with pure anger. Rookie gulped- was he really upset with him? What did he do?
Maybe brining him into a bathtub wasn't a good idea... did it bring back bad memories or something?
"Did you bring me in here?!" Infinite demanded. Rookie nodded yes, keeping his arms outstretched for more Infinite's safety than anything. What was going on?
Rookie approached him carefully, trying to get Infinite to get out of the tub before he slipped and hurt himself. The tub was still slightly fully of slightly murky water, but it still worried him if he slipped.
"Why?! WHY?!"
Rookie felt for his phone, his eyes locked on Infinite in case he tried something stupid. Once his fingers wrapped around it, he quickly snatched it and, without looking, one handed typed something on it. Then he held it up to Infinite.
'You needed a bath, so I... brought you here so you can get clean again. I didn't know it would bother you this much! I'm sorry!'
Infinite closed his eyes, the sudden rush of anger wearing down as his anger disappeared. Now that he was calming down, his head was beginning to hurt. A lot. Rookie tried to help him out, but Infinite shoved him away, thinking he could get out on his own.
He struggled to get one foot out, and lost his balance. Infinite felt like everything was falling in slow motion as he fell, and he anticipated a blow to the back of his head. But none came.
Rookie has managed to grab his arm and stop him from making his body worse than when he started. He held a towel in his other hand, and without looking at Infinite, he wrapped him in it and helped him get out. Infinite noticed Rookie's expression- disappointment? Sadness? It was hard to choose just one... and the air around them... it felt thick. He was upset at him now, and Infinite knew he had a right- he overreacted when all the kid wanted to do was make him comfortable!
They made their way to Infinite's bedroom, and Rookie led him to his bed before he turned to leave and clean out the bathtub. He hadn't text a word to him the entire time.
"W-Wait... I..."
Rookie stopped at the door and shook his head once. He then pointed to a shirt laid out on the chair, and walked out, closing the door behind him.
Infinite felt... for once, he could admit it- terrible. The kid was only doing what he could, and Infinite had been giving him grief every step of the way. Maybe he regretted saving him after all... but he still did. The least the jackal could do was try and work with him, make things... easier for them both...
Rookie closed his door and stumbled to his bed. His arms hurt from having to move an ungrateful jackal in and out of a tub twice to change the water, but his chest hurt worse from the simple notion that he was wrong, and if the Resistance were here, they would have told him the same thing.
"Leave him to die!" "He deserves what he got and more!"
But Rookie wanted so badly to prove them wrong! He knew there had to be SOME good left in him somewhere... even after what he did, he still forgave him because people could change!
But maybe he was wrong... maybe there was just no point in saving someone who was THAT far gone. Was he actually too far gone to be saved? Did he just not care about anyone but himself?
A tear rolled down his cheek. Then another followed. Rookie pressed his face into his pillow and let his tears soak it. He was tired of trying to be strong... maybe, just for now, it would be okay to cry. He'd worry about Infinite later.
Infinite opened his door, as quiet as he could. In his arms, he carried a blanket that Rookie left in his room, as well as a poorly written note. His heart was beating as he stood in front of Rookie's room door, left slightly cracked. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for an angry wolf, and his fingers wrapped around the door knob.
'Go in there! You owe him everything... even if it's not... easy...'
Infinite slowly pushed open the door, and other than a quiet creaking noise, it was silent. He stepped inside the room and used his tail to slowly push the door shut.
On the bed in front of him, back turned towards him and curled in a small grey ball, slept Rookie. Infinite felt a ghost of a smile tug at his muzzle as he set the note down on his desk. The kid must've been tired after all he's done for him...
Infinite spread the blanket over Rookie's sleeping form, and was a bit shocked when the kid didn't so much as move a muscle.
"... thank you. For giving me a chance..." He finally said it. It still sounded weird, but it was a small start- to him, anyways. He smoothed the blanket out, and left out as quietly as he came in.
"... that's.. harder than I thought..." Infinite mused to himself as he climbed back into his bed. He had to admit, he felt much cleaner than before, and maybe that helped clear his head... maybe. He liked the clean part, anyways.
"I hope it worked..."
And complete!
I do apologize for the wait, and I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! There may be about three more chapters after this so stay tuned! :D
Please let me know what you think!
Until next chapter!
