"I love you Teru." I fucking do...

We stayed like that for what seemed like hours. She kept her eyes closed, trembling a little and I kept her close in my arms. Was she still mad? Had it gone worse with that kiss? But she had asked for it. Fuck! What should I do now? She's driving me nuts!

She was bitting so hard on her lip... Why are you always behaving in such a genuine way?

"Teru, please talk to me! I...

- N...no. Don't...

- Teru, please, calm down and look at me. Open your eyes."

I felt her hands timidly pushing me away. My body froze in understanding. Oh god, it's broken. The faith she had put in me... I broke it.

My legs went numb. My arms fell down, not able to hold her anymore. My eyes were still open, that I was sure, though I could't see anything. I had to sit on the floor. I still could ear her unsteady breath. It was so loud in my head...I suddenly got nauseous. Pull out of it Tasuku. You're a son of a bitch. Well, what's new?

"Teru...

- Kurosaki, I... I... I can't. I'm so stupid. I... Sorry!"

And she dashed out slamming the door. She is crying. She left. I'll go to hell, that's a sure thing!

I stayed there, on the floor, time passing by. What had happened? I knew I was doing wrong but it was like she had been calling me from the end of the road. It felt like she was asking me to choose THIS road. So why has it turned out that way?

When I got out of my trance, it was already dusk outside. Teru!

I snatch my phone open, an uneasy feeling growing inside.

"Hey! It's me. Is she with you?... Teru of course! Oh, he told you... But... She left. Is she with you? " She wasn't home.

Riko had no idea of her whereabouts. Neither did the others. I had no way to contact her since she had left her phone behind. She had left Daisy behind... She was alone, outside, in a freezing winter night. Who would protect her now? «now»? Did I ever protect her? I've always been the one needing her. She was the one looking over me, being considerate, trusting me while I couldn't trust myself. I'm an ass. Even my sarcastic smile failed in suppressing the tears that came to my eyes. Teru, where are you, you stupid girl...

My phone started to ring, making my heart jump.

"Riko, what's new?

- Oi, what's with the «What's new»? Still looking for her?

- She is not back? Fuck, fuck, fuck...

- No, not home yet. But aren't you looking for her? I can't believe it! Stop bothering everybody about that and do something yourself! You stupid brat...

- Eh?

- Everyone got worried after you talked to them. I spent an hour on the phone trying to calm them down, and now you tell me that you are at your hotel, warm and cozy, in you room, waiting for others to do the job! You got her to leave, you bring her back! That's how things work.

- Riko, it's not like that. She doesn't want me to find her.

- Tasuku, you're such a kid. Of course she does. And what if she doesn't? Just find her and take her home! That's all!

- Riko, get it already: she doesn't want me to find her. In such a big city, if she doesn't want me to, then it's just not possible for me to find her.

- Wha... Wait...what was that, Tasuku? Ha! Ha! Ha! Could it be that you're referring to the sort of love connection guiding you? Ha! Ha! Ha! You should cut back on the shoujos!

- And you should just shut up. What I'm saying is that we know each other quite well - I guess - so the places I'll go to should be places she will be avoiding! There is no point in...

- Giving up already, Tasuku? What a pity! I thought you were more... Well, go to hell Tasuku, and on your way, don't forget to stop by the places were you would't have looked for Teru!"

She hung up. Riko, you crazy woman...

But she was right! I took my jacket, put on my shoes, opened the door and...

...and there she was, standing, like a lost angel with a broken wing.

My Teru...