Missing
Chapter 3 – Modgudr
Wettish gray mist pressed on Thor's face as soon as the magma redeemed in black ash chunks of his skin and armor and fell onto the bottomless ground.
He breathed hard, every whiff which he choked down his throat threw blisters of fire into his lungs. The flesh on his knuckles had burst, bulging red as a crab on the leather straps of the bridle, which he still held in an iron grasp. A few ends of his golden mane crackled softly, spraying a whirl of sparks over his aching shoulder blades. Sleipnir whinnied pitifully under the weight of the Thunder god, but most of his massive body had remained therefor the heat had demanded a lot from the berserk. All over and under the fabric of his clothes marrow-deep places were found and he felt as he had been roasted alive. Thus a lobster had to feel while been thrown into boiling water and cooking helplessly in his own shell.
Although the applied healing stones and his birth-given ability to regenerate already had fixed the worst damage, he felt miserable enough that he almost wanted to close his tired eyes and drift into an infinite sleep. Despite this thought seemed tempting, Thor shook his head impatiently and told himself to be vigilant. He did not know what outpost ambushed him, if he penetrated closer to the dreary realms.
He only knew - the most delicate hint of weakness was criminally forbidden here.
This was Helheim, the realm of the dead. It was no use to demonstrate his power, or to insist on the status he internalized in his beloved upper .
What mattered most was his legendary concern and the way he made it palatable to the mistress of this terrain. He had never heard before that Hel had ever given one of the souls away which dropped into her lap. And this caused great anxiety to him…
The deeper they slid down, the more the swirling fog bank thinned out. For the crown prince it seemed hours until he spied grained, anthracite-colored stone floor among themselves. At first he thought it would be a optical illusion, a trap for his gount, glowing limbs.
But when Sleipnir sat all his eight hooves on the hard, flat surface, trotted step by step over snorting noisily with relief over the recovered gravity, Thor dismounted and dared himself to the ground, testing ist true nature by knocking on it with his heel.
It resisted his weight. This pumped fresh courage in the Aesir's veins.
Pulling the stallion at his reins behind him, they bridged several meters of a track which soon turned out to be a straight path. Thor turnded his head, looked around suspiciously. Where the God looked, he saw a large, wide Nothing amidst off-white schemes. There was no significant landscape perspective, no rocks or bushes, where he perhaps could orient.
Complete emptiness.
That was everything what Helheim was willing to give him.
Ironically, it reminded Thor immediately of his own emptiness he felt since Loki's death lying like an invisible anvil on his heart. He threatened to sink into his thoughts again.
Did his brother well? Had he finally found reasonable peace? And if so, wouldn't the crown prince commit a serious mistake by he pursuing the intent to rip him from this world and bring him back into the halls of Asgard? Was he too selfish? Was he even egoistic? Had he just come here to prevent the jotun from his last act in the play of life? To even dispute his decision to die?
Was that what he wanted to do cruel in the end? Irresponsible? Sadistic?
Before his own allegations were able to move him to repentance, Sleipnir perkily nudged him between the shoulder blades, promoted him forward imperiously. Surprised Thor turned around, realized that the stallion and he, however, were on the same level now. He no longer had to drag him along behind him - he went on a voluntary basis. And in a remarkable, almost mocking pace.
The thunder god looked Sleipnir into the big, brown eyes and was irritated by the intelligence that was hidden in these endless pupils. He was not aware whether the horse already had internalized this clever impression all the time or this was only shown for a short duration. Anyway, he understood immediately what the horse wanted to dictate him with its invitingly pawing hooves. Thor could not help it when he put a sad smile on his face. The behavior of the stallion touched his heart.
¨You miss him too, right? ¨
Sleipnir responded with an exasperated snort. It sounded like Of course, whatdid YOU think? Now, hurry up you bearded idiot!
Thor laughed.
This one-sided conversation was so abstruse to him that it, mingled with his pain, brought little tears in his eyes. Who would have ever thought that no lesser being as the mount of the All-Father missed Loki with the same devotion, as he did? It was miserable and at the same time immensely comforting to realize he was not the only one. Thor cleared his throat, swallowed several times. His mouth was dry.
¨ We ... should not let him wait any longer . Surely he's quite angry already.", he said roughly, went to the waiting stallion , which shifted his weight in his nervousness alternately on each of its eight legs .
Several times he bowed the elongated skull , as he would want to agree with the Aesir . Together they walked on , crossed the path without looking back . Thor even dared to reach out his hand stroking gently over Sleipnir's ash-gray mane . To his honest joythe stallion granted it without any grumbling .
The crown prince had stopped counting minutes when a gigantic, wrought-iron gate crossed his field of vision. To be honest , Thor had indeed pictured nothing regarding the gateway to Helheim , but he certainly did not expect any ordinary steel fittings, as they were found in Asgard in hundreds of buildings. Confused, he let his gaze ramble over the surrounding.
Where were the departed souls that should cavort in front of the entrance of Hades? Where were the fearsome guardians and the other horrors that had been preached to him in childhood?
They did not exist.
The flat rank before him contained stone and dust, otherwise it was unspotted from each oh so puny sign of life. The Thunderer was clueless. The door was locked by an artful interweaving of various components that had been poured into geometrically flowing forms. Together they created a single, impenetrable plate of iron and gold. Thor did not have a matching key to it yet he had known, in which hole he had to put it to achieve the desired result.
But how should he open this door then? Mjöllnir weighed heavily on his hip . Well, swinging the hammer would have been a possibility, but he wrestled with what might follow after. Previously, he had spared no consequences, accepting them easily. But now, after he endured exile, found new awakened love for Midgard and the people there he used caution. A helter – skelter decision could lead inevitably to death, or worse. At least from that mistake he had learned. Thoughtfully, he bowed his head, crossed his arms over his chest. Sleipnir beside him angrily pushed the air out of his nostrils. He seemed not too happy about their forced stopover.
"Stay calm. We'll find another way", Thor told him softly, but the stallion turned away from him sulkily , trotted to the door and knocked it with an ankle checking the hard material. Before the god of thunder could stop him in time Sleipnir quickly turned around and gave the left leaf a powerful kick with his h ind legs. All four hooves clacked simultaneously against the iron, brought it to a deafening clatter. Alarmed Thor grabbed his weapon, preparing to be overrun by a horde of skeleton warriors. Yet nothing of such sort happened.
"You should keep your horse on a leash, little god. Otherwise my dear Garm will tan its beautifully groomed fur. "
The named man turned in astonishment to the right from where the deep voice came from. His eyes widened. A gigantic woman had pushed herself out of the bounds of fog standing two feet away like she had scarcely grown out of earth. Her body seemed coarse and shapeless as it was built of blocks.
Gruffly was the midnight dark skin, her pupils reminded of almond slices in the milky white ocean of her eyeballs. Her worn face looked grim and unforgiving. I took Thor only a few seconds to realize that she was one of the cruel guardian figures he had heard of and she certainly did not approve Sleipnir's disrespectful behaviour. He sighed inwardly. He had not spoken a single world yet made he already made himself unpopular. This made his mission not easier. He tried to compose himself inhaling deeply.
¨I'm Thor, son of O-¨ he began formally, but the contemptuous laughter of the giantess interrupted him rudely.
¨I know who you are, Thunderer¨, she said, boredom laying in her voice. She severed a mace from her wide belt rotating it playfully in the air. It had thorns on it. They looked spiky. Thor did not want to be sharpened on them. But he knew that he probably could not prevent a fight to get over the entrails Helheims. He still held Mjolnir in a tight grasp.
The hammer was his insurance. His only stop in the middle of nowhere. However, Sleipnir slowly trotted beside the crown prince. He held his head upright, staring at the guard silently. He seemed to feel no fear. Neither towards her, nor towards 'Garm', the growling dog crouched to her bulky feet and blessed with the size of an ox. Viscous drool dripped from the raised lips of the wide snout, eyes glowing red like blood. Thor did not want to get too close to this hound. It would have bitten off his hand up for sure.
¨ I want to talk to thy mistress. She has something that belongs to me ¨, he finally said in a commanding voice, did not know how he should phrase it otherwise.
The giantess smirked. Two gappy, yellow rows of teeth became visible.
¨ Wrong, Aesir. This is Helheim, the home of departed souls. My mistress is the only one who commands here. And nothing belongs to you for everything is dead and legally her property. ¨
Thor ground his teeth. What an irreverent spawn of darkness he had met. But what else could he expect from a giantess ...
¨ What do you call yourself? ¨ he asked warily. ¨ What is your name? ¨
¨ Modgudr" she replied. ¨ I already know who you are. Thor, son of the All-Father and heir of his throne. To be honest, it surprises me that a noble like you dares to stroll in these dark realms. ¨ Her eyes narrowed to calculating slots.
¨ Well, you must have doted on the little frost giant if you want to mess with the goddess of death herself. I admit, I was astonished about your sudden need to save him. Almost ironical for it was his own intention to escape you and the cursed dungeon you trapped him in through suicide. And now YOU come to Helheim and demand to put the stolen soul back into his breathless body? Aesirs these days will never stop to amuse me.¨
The voice of the giantess was cold and hard as a breeze in october night. And each of her barbed words stabbed Thor straight through the heart.
He did not even ask why she knew about his plight. He wanted only one thing – to silence her. Because her cruel, self-evident words revealed what tormented him inside since he had received the message from an excited guard, his brother would be laying mute and rigid on the floor of his cell. He knew that it was pointless to doubt her sentences or to even name and shame any apparent truths. Because if he was honest, he had exactly thought about the same suspicions on which Loki's suicide was concerned. He had been the cause. Among many other things.
He had been the tip of the iceberg.
He was not able to persuade another reason for this developement, because there simply no other existed.
Thor took a deep , rattling breath.
¨ Loki was out of his mind when he picked up the shard to cut himself.¨ he said gruffly , strove for a firm, unwavering tone . ¨ If he had possessed a clear mind , he wouldn't have chosen this dishonourable path . I know my brother. He's too strong to take refuge in suicide. ¨
Modgudr gave him a sidelong glance.
¨ If you actually believe what you're talking, you're more pathetic than I thought ¨ she said dryly as she shouldered her mace. The spines bounced like cotton wool on her granite skin. ¨ But well , you can keep your illusions if they ease your conscience . Nevertheless, you mustn't proceed. This is the end. ¨ With the other, free hand she pointed in the direction Thor and Sleipnir just came from.
¨ Crawl back to your your bright kingdom and turn your back on this fog. The jotun is now one of us. ¨ Her grin widened to the hight of her cheekbones growing into a horrific grimace . ¨ Don't worry. Hel has , as far as I 've heard, already taken a liking to him."
Thor hesitated slightly when he heard the last remark, but managed to catch himself quickly. His eyes hardened , fine lightnings flashed in the cobalt blue iris. The scenarios which Modgudr conjured in his mind drove him bitter and furious. Learning that Hel herself took his brother into custody, spanned every fiber of his body. And the anger, this well-known , liberating anger strengthened his decision from second to second .
¨ I will only go when Loki comes with me. Alive ¨ , he said , and his voice rumbled like the thunder itself over the washed-out schemes that would have been mentioned 'country' in other worlds.
Ordinary enemies would have been threaten by that date, or at least the foresight to escape. But Modgudr remained immune against the rage of the Aesir. Not a single step she backed away. Who could tell what monstrous figures she had met and killed during her eternal patrol.
She was old , perhaps older than many mountains , perhaps older than the stone floor at her feet and the gate behind her back.
Many things had happened to her. Lots of strange things for sure. She had faced many dangerous situations. Above all, she had faced many stubborn creatures before.
And the fact that a god like Thor descended into this sea of mist and dared to speak out against the death sentence of Hel was certainly no exception that would have been stated explicitly. She even let out a loud yawn, which was hardly intended to be mitigated with her hand, so that Thor could look at her rust-red throat. Him about a shiver.
Whether it was indignation or disgust he felt he could not say at that moment. Probably both.
¨ You had your chance, Thunderer ¨ she said in a bored tone, took her mace from her shoulder and let it bounce on the ground in which formed narrow cracks in a blink of an eye. ¨ And you lost it. However, if you do not understand otherwise, I'll probably have to help you with your little farewell. The years taught me it's quite sufficient to break one's legs and arms in such case. The Asgardian people were always more snivelling than mine. Millennia didn't change that. ¨
With heavy steps she came up to Thor. The earth shook under her weight. She walked almost leisurely. As if she did not intend to shatter Thor's bones, but want to shake his hand in greeting. Thor flinched no inch, remained in place. Mjolnir pulsed aggressively in his fist.
The hammer had tasted no more giant blood since the last time Thor payed a visit to Jotunheim, no wonder that her appetite had grown so much. Her master, however, was so moved by despair, pain and self-hatred that he had randomly beaten up each creature that stood against him right now. Sleipnir had knowingly taken some distance, watching the spectacle with silent satisfaction. Had the stallion been able to, he would probably applaud with his hooves (which admittedly would have looked a bit strange ...).
Only half a meter separated Thor and the Guardian when a sudden icy chill ran down over the Thunderer's flesh . Suddenly he gasped for breath as he felt his lungs would have dipped in frost. Modgudr stopped abruptedly , turning her angular head , as if she had heard someone calling her name .
Shortly after Thor heard a pitiful , deafening squeal close to him. He looked up, his vision focused on the iron gate . He was not mistaken . The huge wings of steel swung open invitingly. And the bigger the gap was that they offered , the more it was as if a bony hand wrapped around his beating heart , threatening to tear it out of his chest. Sleipnir whinnied nervously , stood on his hind legs. Even he realized the deadly presence from the place behind the entrance .
Thor squared his shoulders .He was a bit scared, yes, yet he could not help but feel some relief in this unique message.
¨ It seems your mistress knows who I am and wants to prepare a fitting reception ¨ he declared and gave Modgudr a triumphant , piercing look .
The gigantic woman merely snorted contemptuously.
¨ Hel does not discriminate between gods and mortals , you fool ¨ she said undauntedly , clasped her mace firmly back on her belt . She turned her head to the side until her neck let out a smacking crack. ¨ Remember, Odin was the one who once threw her as young girl in this dreary gap and gave her existence in the hands of fate . She didn't choose this kind of craft voluntarily.¨
She grinned maniacally. A vicious, animalistic glint sprung into her eyes , greatly expanded her pupils. Thirst for revenge, as Thor knew this expression oh too well .
¨ She hates him more than life hates her . I think she will make the example of you which old Odin denied her for so long . ¨
Her giggle sounded hollow and clattered tinnily out her throat.
Thor swallowed hard , but did not show his nervousness bubbling . Just as his shock. It was the first time he had heard that the goddess of death had obtained her ungrateful duty from his father.
¨ Oh yeah ? ¨ he said defiantly , preserved the self-confident appearance . ¨ What does she hope to accomplish then. Kill me?"
¨There are worse fates than death, Thunderer.¨
Thor shook his head impatiently, ran his fingers through his hair.
"So be it", he muttered stubbornly, darted his eyes to Sleipnir, ¨ Take care of my horse while I'm gone. When I return and see that you laid a finger on him - ¨
The giantess stopped him with a wave of her hand, before Thor could finish his sentence.
"I vouch for his integrity. Hel's guests are treated like porcelain ¨, she implored him soberly, then turned to her hellhound, which, however, tried to bite the chain he wore on his neck with sharp teeth. His action was crowned with moderate success. The first steel fragments already piled up on grayish ground.
Modgudr narrowed her eyes in a tricky way. ¨ But by Garm you never know. He is always so terribly impetuous. Especially when he meets a new playmate ... ¨ she let her words ominously fade away ominously.
But when the thunder god did not answer it, nor ventured a few more steps into the deeper realms of Helheim, the corners of her mouth sank rapidly.
¨What is it!?¨ she asked brusquely, ¨Now go finally before Hel changes her is capricious like a corpse.¨
Thor looked at her. Then to the open gate. Finally, to Sleipnir, who looked at him in silence. The stallion stood like a statue, calm and collected. He did not move from his spot. He would wait for him. Until Loki returned. Until he had brought his little brother back.
Thor hesitated. For a heartbeat. Two heartbeats. Three. This was his chance. His last chance to change their destiny.
He would get no more.
Finally he began to move and crossed the entrance to the Underworld without looking back again. His hulking silhouette was greedily swallowed by the swirling streaks of shadow. Unaware of what lurked in them.
Tbc…
Hello dear readers :D
Finally I could post the third chapter. I hope you enjoyed reading it^^
And thank you very much for your lovely comments, I'm so happy about every single word of feedback you give me :')
Love,
Nathaira
