Never Give In
Chapter Three
I was woken up by a furious knock at the door. I was surprised the person didn't hammer my door down the rate they were going at. I thumped over to the door and turned the doorknob and there stood my best friend with the biggest grin on his face. He had snake bites and jet black hair covering one eye. His blue eyes pierced me just like Andy's and they were lined with a fine line of eyeliner. Wow just a year ago he was the cute best friend and now he's the hot best friend. Why was I saying no all those years ago? I was the most stupid kid in the world. He pulled me into a bear style hug and held on for dear life. This is why I love my Alex Evans.
"I've missed you" Alex whispered in my ear. My voice failed me and couldn't form all of the words that I had to say. I was stumped every time I looked at his face. He'd changed so much in the past year or two that he almost didn't look like my Alex.
"I've missed you too" I managed to choke out. I am the lamest person in the world. I haven't seen the only person who gave me faith in a year and the only thing I can say is 'I miss you too' I don't have a clue why Andy showed an interest in me.
"Your hair's different. Blue streaks instead of hot pink" He laughed whilst taking a moment to study my face which was soon to be soaked in tears of happiness.
"What do you think?" I asked while holding up a handful of my hair.
"It makes you look even hotter" Alex sighed. I could tell if he was being serious or trying to joke on with me. I had to start leaning his facial expressions again. Damn! It just goes to show how long it's been.
"Nice joke" I laughed. I didn't want an awkward silence to fall between us when we had only been talking for a few minutes. That wouldn't show much for friendship at all and besides I had lots to talk to him about namely the whole mess with Andy.
"No joke Skye. You look great" Alex said. He looked at me closely for a minute and then sat down at the small office chair by my computer desk.
"She does look good doesn't she?" Someone said from behind me. I whirled around to see Andy standing in my doorway with one of his signature smiles. The smile that made me melt, the smile that made me go weak at the knees ever since I first watched a Black Veil Brides interview on the internet.
"Hi Andy" I greeted whilst trying to flash him a nice smile of my own but I probably just looked like an idiot but I didn't care anymore. Now Alex was going to meet Andy. This will be great. No! Now how do I tell Alex about my problem? Andy walked over to me and bent. His lips were on mine for a brief moment but that didn't stop the tingling feeling I get whenever he's here.
"Who's this?" Andy asked whilst pointing at Alex. I knew he wasn't jealous but some part of me wanted him to be. The thought of Alex and Andy fighting over me almost made my heart stop dead in my chest. I wish I hadn't told Andy we were going too fast yesterday. What was I thinking?
"I'm Alex Evans" Alex greeted with an outstretched hand. Andy took it and shook slightly before letting his hand fall back to his side.
"Is this the best friend that you were telling me about yesterday?" Andy asked me. I gave him a quick nod and kissed his cheek. I don't know why I just done that but I do know that I couldn't stop myself from doing it. It was as though something inside of me was telling me that I had to kiss him and that part of me wasn't going to let me give up easily at all. When I looked back at Alex he seemed slightly shocked but mostly I saw hurt lurking in those eyes that I loved so much. Why was everything so difficult when two guys who like you are in the same room?
"We're not actually going out, we're just sort of thinking about it" I said in an incredibly lame way. Trust me to make things so much worse than they already are.
"Yeah we decided on that yesterday" Andy added. Wow" He still had that warm smile on his face and quite frankly he didn't look half as jealous as Alex was looking right now. You could tell that Alex didn't want it to show and that he was trying to hide it as much as possible but I knew him well and his attempts were completely failing. Don't get me wrong I feel awful for him. After all those years of us being the only people that matter to each other and then some guy from my favourite band walks in and steals my attention. It's not like I can stop feeling the way that I do about Andy because that's impossible but I know that I can't push Alex out of the picture either. The best thing to do at the minute is to just try and get them to be friendly with each other and we'll move forward from there. I just had to think of something to say or something to do to get them to strike up a conversation.
"So Andy, why don't you tell Alex about your band" I suggested. Andy shared a glance with me and nodded in complete understanding. He knew exactly what I was trying to do and he was fine with it. I think it's due to the fact that he didn't have friends when he was a kid so now he was willing to make friends with anyone who would give him the time of day. I thought that was a good thing. He was friendly to everyone except from the people who were twats to him which to be fair they are the ones who started it, not to sound childish or anything but they need to learn to keep their mouths shut. Andy went and sat down next to Alex and began telling Alex all about the history of Black Veil Brides. I couldn't even be bothered to listen anymore. I had heard the stories about a million times when I was obsessed with them but Alex hadn't heard any of these stories and he was engrossed in whatever Andy was sharing with him. Talk about cute! Every time I looked over at Alex he seemed to be slightly more interested in Andy and to be honest I didn't blame him. When I was in the coffee shop I found his voice mesmerising both times. He really knew how to grab someone's attention and he knew how to maintain it which made him even more perfect than I thought he was and I already thought he was amazing. I told myself that I wasn't going to listen to the stories that I had already heard but I couldn't stop myself. As you can probably tell I don't have any will power. I had finally figured out what my weakness was I knew I had one I just hadn't figured out what it was but now I know. My weakness was Andy Six. Everything he does gets me. He only has to say 'jump' and I'll say 'how high?' I wasn't bothered though and that's what's angering me. I should care. I know it but its Andy Six! How do I say no to someone like that? I can tell you know that it's damn near impossible. I must admit that hearing him tell the stories in person is better than watching it on the internet. His voice sends even more shockwaves through me than it normally does.
"I want to hear your music" Alex said. It seems like Andy has got him interested in Black Veil Brides and has successfully took his mind of me and Andy being together. Thank the lord. I picked my Ipod up and put it on the docking station.
"Which song?" I asked Andy. He came up behind me and put his hands on my hips.
"The Mortician's Daughter" He whispered in my ear. A small giggle burst out of me and I regretted it as soon as it had left my lips. Andy and I had been careless. All of Andy's work on Alex had been for nothing because when I next looked over he had an angry look on his face but he was still trying to hide it. Damn it! It would be much easier if he just came right out and told me off for the hurt that I was causing him because I knew it was there and it was killing me as much as it was hurting him. It was up to him though. If he wanted to talk about it then he had to bring it up so until then I'll act as though nothing has happened. So with that I pressed play and sat back down. I relaxed to the sound of Andy's angelic singing. I let it wash over me and cleanse me so it would let me forget about the hurt that I had caused Alex but the second I thought about his name everything came running back. I couldn't forget about my relationship with Alex but I couldn't forget about Andy either. It was a lose lose situation no matter what I done I was going to hurt someone. I'd been friends with Alex for years and believe or not I wanted it to stay that way but I knew that he like me more than that I just had to figure out a way to explain that I didn't have the same feelings that he did without making him hate me.
"It's good" Alex finally said. I mentally sighed in relief. At least he wasn't so childish that he would make Andy feel like crap to get back at him for making me feel as though I was in love. I had to explain to Andy that I had to talk to Alex. This could either go really well or really bad.
"Andy, can I speak to you?" I asked. Andy started to nod but I had already grabbed his hand and was pulling him over to the bathroom. I slammed the door shut and locked it.
"He's going to get upset" Andy laughed. I rolled my eyes at him but carried on with what I was going to tell him.
"I need to explain everything to Alex so you're going to have to leave" I blurted. Oh God! Andy's going to get mad at me, I know it.
"Hey, it's fine. I'll text you ok?" Andy said. He pecked my cheek slightly. When his lips broke off mine he lingered as though he wanted to do more but he knew he shouldn't. He finally managed to pull away. He walked over to the door, unlocked it and then he was gone. It was time to have the showdown with Alex. I took one deep breath and stepped outside of the bathroom just to receive an accusing glare from Alex.
"So you and Andy are close" Was all he managed to say. I hate to say it but his harsh silences were breaking my heart.
"It doesn't matter. This is our weekend" I said honestly. It really was the complete truth. This was just about me and Alex. Andy does not need to be involved in this.
"Ok then so what's the first thing we're going to do?" Alex asked.
"But first you have to realise that I don't love you in the way that you love me" I blurted. When I next looked at Alex my heart broke even more. The hurt in his eyes was clearly visible and he wasn't even trying to hide it this time.
"I don't want to love you in that way" Alex whispered. I threw my arms around his neck and clung on tightly.
"I'm so sorry" I sobbed. He seemed hesitant but he put his arms around my waist and clung on just as tightly as I did.
"Skye, we'll be fine. We are the coolest best friends in the world and together there's nothing that we can't overcome" Alex sighed. Thank God! That was the first time I was able to relax in three days. Man! It felt so good. I suppose everyone has those jealous moments and besides what was Alex meant to think? He was probably only scared of the fact that he could be losing his best friend to a rockstar.
"Right, it's time to do something really fun" I said whilst wiping away my tears. Alex leaned back slightly and smiled. We were back to our normal selves.
"Movies are what I find fun" Alex admitted. I threw my head back and laughed loudly. I may not have seen Alex in a year but his personality hasn't changed at all since I met him.
"Go pick a film" I groaned whilst pointing at the cabinet on the other side of the room. He bent down slightly and scanned the film titles. After what felt like hours of him trying to choose a film to watch he finally settled on 1408. I could have kissed him for his DVD choice. It was one of my favourite films in the world. I find the whole point of it creepy but that's how I go with things. I like the thought of the unexplainable. The thought terrifies yet thrills me.
Alex settled into my black cushions and sighed. I lay back and focused on the film but I couldn't ignore the feel of Alex's eyes on me. It was beginning to freak me out and was giving me a complex. I presented him with a pretty intimidating stare of my own.
"I'm sorry about being so awkward when it came to Andy" Alex finally said. My look softened. He was fragile about that and I felt awful about it. After all those years that I've known him I have never seen anything affect him like this has and it was making me hate myself for ever putting him in such a heart breaking situation like that one.
"It's fine. You had a right to be upset about that" I finally replied.
"Did I?" He asked with a hopeful look in his eyes that made me want to kiss him and tell him I love him but that could never happen.
"Yes you do but we're all friends" I said, putting emphasis on the 'friends' so he got the message and it seemed to work. He turned away from me and went back to the film which made me relieved. I kept my distance from him while we watched 1408 but it was difficult. I was so used to cuddling up with him but now it just felt weird. Alex seemed to be on guard at all times and he wasn't relaxing like I was trying to. When the film was done Alex seemed to jump off the bed and practically run to the other side of the room.
"I'm going into the shower" Alex said and then the bathroom door was locked and I was alone feeling even guiltier than I did just before. I sat in silence and listened to the water drum off Alex's body. Finally the water was shut off and then Alex popped round wearing a hoodie and jeans. I practically jumped off the bed and wrapped my arms around his neck. He laughed lightly and wrapped his arms around my waist.
"Please don't hate me" I whispered whilst tightening my grip on him, if that was even possible.
"I don't hate you" He said pulling away from me to look into my eyes. His blue eyes burned into mine and I could tell that the love he had for me had been building up ever since we were children and now he couldn't take it anymore. He was making me feel self conscious and that was when I realised that friends don't make each other feel like that. I also realised that I felt more than just friendliness towards him and it was just getting awakened now. In those few seconds of gazing into each other's eyes our whole history flashed before my eyes. I couldn't stop myself from leaning in and touching his lips with mine. Alex dropped my hands and cupped my face with his hands. I quickly pulled away and looked into his eyes for reassurance.
"Alex, I'm sorry" I started but I was cut off.
"Don't apologise" He said before pressing his lips back to mine. I managed to push him away and thankfully he didn't seem mad at me for cutting our kiss short.
"This can't happen" I whispered regretfully. He took my hands and bent ever so slightly so that he was eye level with me.
"All I ask is that you think about it" He said. His voice went high at the end as though he was asking me a question so I tried to smile and nod but it just looked weak. Alex looked chuffed with himself. I walked over to the bed and tucked myself in.
"I'm going to sleep" I groaned and then I flipped over so I was lying on my stomach and closed my eyes.
In a few hours I was still awake. There was only one difference. Alex was now in my bed so I shuffled over to the very edge and closed my eyes one last time.
