When Carlito woke up, the truck was now stationed against a tree. He looked around for Santino, only to find him by a bonfire nearby.

"What happened?" Carlito asked.

"That trucker turned out to be-a fag so I threw him out of the truck. Then we crashed into this-a tree." Santino said.

"Where's the trucker now? And where did that fire come from?" Carlito asked.

"The trucker is most probably at a police-a station, reporting us for stealing his truck and for assaulting him…Oh, and he was keeping beef jerky in his truck so I burned it to make-a a fire."

"You burned our food?!" Carlito said.

"Relax my dear friend. We've never had such a great-smelling fire before."

"Wait, what was that??" Carlito said, turning around.

From the distance he saw a large mob enter the forest. The one leading it was the gay trucker they had met. The mob consisted of several policemen and some openly-gay truckers.

"How did you know he went to the police station?!"

"Oh, we passed by one and I saw that-a faggot limp towards it when I threw him out." Santino said.

"Crap!" Carlito said, grabbing Santino by the arm and running for their lives.

"Why'd you have to throw him out of his truck?" Carlito demanded.

"I cannot forgive him for what he did to my people! They put-a us in concentration camps and made us wear socks with sandals." Santino shot back.

"Those weren't gay people! They were the Nazis and they only did that to Jews! You're Italian!!"

"Oh." Santino said, "My bad then."

They both ran screaming towards the woods. In the middle of it all, they saw a wardrobe. Not wanting to be caught by the mob, they entered the wardrobe and hid inside it. The wardrobe was roomier that they thought and it started to get cold inside. Pretty soon, they felt ice underneath their feet. They turned to see a huge lamp post and a forest covered with snow. They walked around a bit until they bumped into an odd goat-like creature.

"Hello, I'm Mr. Tumnus and welcome to Narnia!" The faun said, waving around a sack of cheesy puffs.

"Hey! That's-a my cheesy puff!!" Santino yelled.

Scared, Mr. Tumnus ran away from the enraged Italian and ran off into the woods. Carlito chased after them until he found Santino standing over the bloody faun.

"Why?" The faun said sadly.

"L-L-Lucy!! I'm not….a….pedophile…Don't go." He said before coughing out some blood and died.

"Why did you kill him?!" Carlito said, kneeling down and caressing Tumnus' head.

"He was my favorite Narnia character…" He said, tears flowing.

"He got hair on my cheesy puffs." Santino said.

Anger surging through him, Carlito picked up a conveniently-placed crow bar on the ground and was about to swing when he saw the most beautiful thing in the world.

It was like a scene from some obscure fairy tale book. There were people, muscular men and women and they were all wearing medieval type clothing. There was a huge castle and shops all over. Dirty children were playing and the women looked as if they were bare underneath their clothes. Carlito dropped the crowbar and threw aside Tumnus' corpse, not noticing a teenage boy dragging it away and attacking it with the crowbar.

"I never liked you, you no good goat!" Skandar Keynes said, as he mutilated Tumnus.

Carlito dragged Santino towards the village.

"We're here…RoidsWorld!!" Carlito said happily.