The buried past

Again I went into the forest but in the daytime this time, only because I planed to spend the entire day and most of the night in the forest searching for answers also for my missing things. I woke up this morning to find my pills gone, my tapes were gone from Hoodie as well as myself, even some of the objects from the attic were gone. I don't know how but somehow Hoodie and Masky were either messing around with me or trying to help me in their own way without being direct. Either way I feel like I'm figuring out more to this puzzle of my past.

Some of the names are starting to sound familiar and I could remember little details about them, the clearest memories I could conjure up from my mind were the ones of Masky, Hoodie, even a few of Slender but they weren't to clear of him but I knew that he wasn't always there wherever "there" was. I could never see a place but I was inside I just didn't know what I was looking for but then again was I ready to jump right into my past? I knew that whatever "there" was I would find all of them there, they all lived together it was safer and easier for them that way. I remember someone telling me that Slender watches over the Creepypasta's and protects them, that "there" was a safeheaven for them, they could escape the cops and troubles of the human realm.

Whenever I try harder to remember whatever "there" was my head would hurt like crazy and I would feel like I was going to vomit. Whatever the doctors did to me they did a great job of making sure I forgot the past, but I was determined to figure it out no matter what that meant and if it meant trying to find my stuff in the forest then I would do just that. First I went to the house where I found another tape along with the small bag where all of my tapes where as well as my pill bottles, at the hospital I found more and more tapes at least seven more all throughout but still no static or any sign of Masky or Hoodie I don't know if they're still helping me or if Slender told them to stay away all I know is that they work for Slender as his proxies and that they to had the same symbol on my hand. So did that mean that I to was one of his proxy and if so then what would I have to do?

I felt terrible again just thinking about helping out Slender especially after all the freaky stuff that's happened to me so far but then again it doesn't seem like he wants to hurt me so maybe this doesn't mean I'm his proxy but that at one time I was one of them, maybe this is how he's trying to help to lead me to the truth it always seems after all that when I hear that strange static I find something of use. After getting back all of my things I just apperated back not wanting to spend any more time in the forest tonight it was getting dark and there was a dreadful sense that tonight I shouldn't be here at all. I went through the tapes the moment I got home and there was some interesting things.

There were a couple of enteries from Marble Hornets again but there were some of Hoodie fiming it looked like he started at my house and walked through the forest coming up to places that I hadn't seen before maybe he's trying to lead me to more evidence about who I was back then. I felt terrible for the next few days and ended up getting terribly sick, Ben came over a few times to make sure I was ok and once or twice he ended up staying the night. He was sweet, kind, gentle, caring, protective, I loved him but what I didn't love was how much it hurt whenever I thought about him clearly my heart was warning me about him and maybe I should listen to it. Well for now there's nothing between us and maybe it's best it stays that way.

I went back into the forest and followed Hoodies footsteps into the forest and came upon a tall red tower but there was something forboding about it and so I didn't go closer, next I was taken to a strange building but once upstairs my mind jerked and I remembered the episode when Alex almost shot Jay and Jessica that was until Masky came and saved them and I shivered at the thought it seemed as though while I believed that it was all just creativity and not reality as the doctors always told me, as well as the signs online, for a while I believed that these were just stories that they weren't real but they were leading me exactly to where they had shot but then again it really could just be Tim and Brian messing around and thinking that they're sending another fangirl on a wild gooschase but that wouldn't explain the strange static, the tapes, there was a lot that wouldn't fit if it was Tim and Brian joking around.

But the strange thing was that I didn't live near Rosswood forest and yet here were the exact buildings from Marble Hornets set up exactly as they were in the enteryies. It was all strange and didn't make sense but then again I was in an Asylum twice trying to forget everything that I was no digging back up so I guess it was my fault that I was doing this but I've come to far it's not like I could stop right? I guess I could but I feel like I'm onto something big so I guess I can only keep going. This time when I followed where Hoodie went in the tapes I found there was no evidence, no tapes, no nothing just the structures themselves. When I got back to the attic I went through the boxes but nothing interesting came up and soon I feel asleep next to the window with my computer screen on and several tabs of their stories were up.

Once again in the morning I grabbed my camera and set off into the forest searching for something I don't know honestly anything at this point could be helpful. All I know about the past is that I knew Masky, Hoodie, and Slenderman and I'm guessing that maybe we were friends or something because all that I've found has been somewhat helpful and the rest junk, but also not once has either of them ever once tried to attack me as done in Marble Hornets (btw I'm not trying to steal anything from them they are amazing film makers with potential and I love their Slenderman videos really great). Um there's also been some dreams I've had of others though I can't see their faces to well but I can remember small bits about them and what they did but nothing is clear to me. As I as thinking about everything while looking for anything I didn't think that the answers were right underneath me, literally as I was walking I fell into a hole and it was pretty deep. I rummaged through the hold for some reason and found six tapes sitting in the hole, I looked around for more holes and I found a few more in all I gathered maybe thirteen tapes which I raced home eager to see what Hoodie had hidden for me this time.

Most of the tapes didn't make much sense to me, they were videos of different people or at least the people who I thought I remembered where clear while the others weren't. I stopped watching the tapes and opened up a document on my computer and re-read throught the enteries. I had written down the dreams of these people that I've had hoping that I could make a connection but I was beginning to see that I couldn't do this alone, I needed someone to help me uncover the past but even Desteria admitted that the doctors had gotten to some of her memories.

"Do you think that maybe I could get Hoody or Masky to tell me more besides leaving these tapes?"

Doubt it from what I can remember they usually stick to themselves. I think this is their way of "helping" you remember.

"Is there anyone else that might be in the forest that could help?"

No I can't think of any of the others besides Slender but you haven't seen much of him at all.

She was right it was clear from the videos that Masky and Hoodie were pretty quiet and would use these tapes as their way of helping me and I've only seen Slender a few times in my search for the truth about my past.

Maybe you should call up Ben maybe he could...

"No I can't tell him I'm digging up the past again. Even though I trust him he still helped them reach their goal of making me forget he'd probably destroy what I already remember even if it is all jumbled up he wouldn't help."

Right sorry. Do you still like him?

"I think it's safe if we stay as friends besides my heart still aches whenever I'm with him and I don't like that pain."

You think it's trying to tell you that your not suppose to be with him?

"I don't know what it's telling me but that doesn't matter I don't have time for a love life, besides if I do remember everything in the past then I don't think I could pull anyone outside into it all."

Yeah that'd be hard.

I rubbed my eyes and looked outside at the forest hoping to see one of them but all I saw were trees and nothing else not even a bird flying above in the clear blue sky, didn't even hear the sound of static off in the distance I wouldn't even mind if it sounded warning like just to hear the sound would be enough to know that he was still out there and that they were trying to help me at least, just to know that they're real and that I'm not insane. My parents came home a few hours ago and I told them that I haven't really done anything but just go through the attic.

"Oh and what did you find up there dear?" my mother asked

"Nothing really just some old boxes of stuff."

"Did you go outside and try and make friends?" she asked and I just shock my head.

"It's still to soon for that they still think of me as "Demented Katie" I don't know if they could ever see me as anything else but what I had become and what I did to them. What I did isn't easy to forget and forgive mom this still needs time to heal before anyone can start over again and see that I'm different."

I knew that no matter how much time passed no one could ever see me as anything else besides the killer I had been or just another mental patient who should still be at the Asylum no one would move past what I had become. But what about the resturant manager who had forgiven me for killing his only child? No, that was only one person in an entire town none of the others would be as forgiving as he had been.

"They still see me as a threat, as a insane Asylum patient, I don't think they can move on from what happened."

"We can always move Katie if you want to truly start again." my father said

"I don't want to move and start all over again that's what led to this remember. We moved here because you thought things could have gotten better if I moved from all those bullies but look where it led me? I like it here, I like this house I have good memories of being here even when you guys were gone I don't want to move and if I have to deal with what I had been then I will even if that means that I don't have friends I still have Ben to talk to."

"Speaking of Ben how is he? Have you seen him recently?"

I told them about when he came over and took me to the circus and that we had a great time watching the clowns, I didn't tell them about the black and white clown named Laughing Jack or how I left for a while becuase my mind was racing. I didn't want to worry them, didn't want to be sent back, I wanted to remember. I couldn't sleep that night and I ended up re-watching the tapes on my laptop and re-tracing our steps hoping to stir something up but I got nothing. I went back to a creepypasta website that I had found that had all of them and re-read all the stories, looked at the pictures, but still nothing. I went over to my window and looked down praying that I would see Slender or Hoodie standing there or even hear the sound of static leading me into the forest to another tape but the night remained quiet.

The trail was getting cold and I was at a stand-still with uncovering my past. Regardless I headed outside into the forest and walked around aimlessly not really caring where I was going or if I could find my way back I just needed to get out of the house and clear my mind.

Couldn't sleep?

"No besides I'm at a stand-still with this are you sure there's nothing more you can tell me about those that I know?"

I told you all that I know about those three I don't remember a lot about Jack besides the fact that he's a clown and has some obsession with candy but that's about it. Have you seen any other dreams about that one guy?

For some reason I've had a few dreams that involve a guy in a white jacket, a strange smile, bleached white skin, he holds a knife but that's all that's clear to me about this guy but I remember being happy around him as though there's something in the past that involved him and he made me happy but that was all that i could think of about him.

"Nothing more then the usual. Are you sure you don't remember a name?"

I don't, thought what you described I can see him but I can't pin a name on him.

"Don't worry yourself over it it's ok."

Are you sure you want to be walking around here tonight?

"Is there something wrong?"

No I was just wondering, you have no leads, you've been everywhere that's been on those tapes, we don't really know what else is out here.

"I know but still I need to clear my mind and go over what I do know even if it's not much."

But she sounded nervouse so I decided to head back to the house adn just laid awake in my bed staring up at the ceiling thinking about what I know so far even though it's not much it's still something. At some point I must have fallen asleep because I could feel myself falling into the darkness and waking up in front of what looked like a blurry white building but it felt familiar and when I went inside the people I saw were familiar as well. I saw the guy with the bloodstained jacket, Masky, Hoodie,Laughing Jack, and Slender but I couldn't hear what they were saying. Hoodie had a camera with him and he seemed to be recording something, was this how he made the tapes? He just used those that I knew so far and made some sort of video. But how did he know that I only could remember these five so far?

I woke up to the sound of my mom shaking me.

"What is it mom?" I said tired

"Unfortunetly honey we have to leave again buisness came up last night."

"Where are you going this time?"

"Iceland. You can come with us if you want to or do you want to stay here again?"

"I'll stay here mom I'm not ready to leave town just yet and I don't think if the doctors found out I was leaving so soon they'd be happy about that I'd rather not go back."

"Ok dear." she kissed the top of my head "We'll be in touch."

"Once a week again?"

"That's the plan unless you'd rather us call more or less."

"No that's fine mom have fun."

I watched her leave and heard the taxi drive away from our house but went back to sleep I was tired and didn't get much sleep last night. But I was walking through the forest again in daylight, as I was walking though I heard walking behind me as though someone was falling me and when I turned around I woke up with a sudden need to go into the forest like right now. SO I threw on some cloths, grabbed my camera, and headed out into the forest looking for anything and listening for the sound of static but as I kept walking I didn't hear or see anything but trees and other stuff you see in forests so I went back home and back to bed. The next time when I woke up it was noon but instead of going through the boxes or anything else I picked up the book on my nightstand and decided to read it for no good reason at all.

Are you going to go back?

"Do you think I should?"

You never know what it was you might have seen in your dream and it could be just what you need to keep going.

"Ok I'll go after this chapter."