A/N: And now we begin our story proper. I'll also be doing some minor revisions on Chapter 2 due to some pig disgusting proofreading errors I overlooked in my hastiness to get this fic off the ground. Feel free to leave any questions/comments/etc.
Spacehead
Commander Ikari lowered his hands onto his desk, and Misato Katsuragi felt her stomach drop in tandem. She, the First, and the Second sat before the imposing man in various states of disarray.
Rei adjusted the sullied cotton patch covering her bloodied right eye, using the other to stare at the ground in a mixture of confusion and guilt.
Asuka tapped her foot on the floor impatiently, twirling the singed ends of her hair between the torn gloves of her suit.
Misato was at a loss for words, holding her aching arm against the old scar that ran down her chest.
I'll take whatever you got old man, we're lucky to be alive.
The city above carried on, though its battle scars were still fresh. Sirens wailed and acrid smoke tainted the otherwise blue sky. And in the middle of downtown, a gargantuan black body bled rivers of blue ichor into the cracked streets.
Snarling in anger, the commander removed his glasses and leaned forward to address the three "heroes."
"I want to know everything."
Earlier that day…
Shinji was nudged awake by the Section-2 agent seated beside him.
"We'll be arriving at Tokyo-3 in just a few minutes, Mr. Ikari."
The boy nodded, eyes trailing over the rolling hills beyond the windows of the bullet train.
Mr. Ikari, that's a new one.
Back home, Sensei and the townsfolk had always addressed him as Shinji. Even with his father's official demeanor, he was never anything but cordial with his only son. Gendo's visits were few and far between, but Shinji understood that he was a busy man.
"Son," he'd said during their last meeting "are you sure this is what you want?"
"You and Mom founded NERV to help people, and it's only right that I stand by that."
Gendo hoped that his face didn't betray his discomfort at the idea.
"Shinji, being a Hero is more than just putting on a cape and wearing the badge. It requires a certain… finesse, certain talents and abilities. Do you understand?"
"I understand, Dad." The boy looked somewhat crestfallen. "Can I at least come to Tokyo-3 to see you and the Heroes in action?"
"I don't see why not." He laughed ruffling the boy's head. "Come see me when you think you're ready."
But that was two years ago. Two years before Shinji Ikari finally found something he was good at. He cracked his knuckles, his leg jittering in anticipation as he remembered the last words Sensei had told him.
Knock 'em dead, kid.
Then the lights went out and the train came to a screeching halt. Shinji instinctively braced himself against the seat in front as the compartment lurched and the other passengers erupted in a flurry of shouts. Next to him, the agent grunted into his earpiece.
"We're stranded just outside city limits!" He grabbed the boy's arm and gave him what he probably thought was a reassuring nod. "What the hell's going on? Is it an earthquake?"
The evacuating passengers dashed outside, pointing and screaming at the smoke pouring out of the glittered skyline.
"Call in one of our birds, I've got a VIP in need of immediate evac!" the agent demanded. "Loaded for bear my ass, all we need are two seats!"
Through the soles of his feet, Shinji felt a distant, measured rumble.
Sure doesn't feel like an earthquake.
Above, the whine of VTOL engines could be heard. Disembarking from the train, the boy shielded his face from the dirt kicked up from the thrusters. Through his fingers, he could see a red fig leaf stenciled on the side of the boxy, fish-like craft.
"Change of plans, Mr. Ikari" the agent led him towards the doors. "Please step inside and we'll continue by air."
"But what about those people?" Shinji yelled over the engines, pointing to the travelers still milling around the train.
"Rescue operations are already underway" he pushed the kid inside "but the Commander specifically asked that we escort you to the Geofront immediately."
Shinji nodded reluctantly, trying in vain to strap himself into the seat's complicated harness.
"Boy you two sure are lucky we caught ya" the pilot drawled over the PA. "We just got the order from the FOB to scramble all available units."
Shinji looked around the cabin, examining the stone-faced operatives clutching assault rifles seated opposite him. Not wanting to risk eye contact, he turned his head to the wing, which was adorned with rack upon rack of missiles and rockets.
"Are you sure this is just an earthquake?" he asked the agent.
"Yeah, don't worry kid we'll have you safe and sound in no time. Trust me."
Which he did. After all, he was just one kid. And these… these were professionals.
"Hey, I'll trade you my chocolate pudding for that box of Pocky" Asuka offered her partner, wiggling her eyebrows encouragingly. The pale girl mulled it over for a moment before replying.
"The pudding and some your tuna sandwich."
"You drive a hard bargain Wonder Girl, but I accept."
The food switched hands and Asuka continued humming softly as their legs dangled over the edge of the skyscraper's roof. It was another cloudless day in the endless summer, but the crisp breeze kept them both from frying in the angry sun.
"So who're we supposed to pick up anyway?"
"I take it you ignored the subject profile completely?" Rei chastised her.
"Been busy wrapping up that fighting ring case" she shrugged in between mouthfuls. "Gimme a break."
"It's the commander's son. He's supposed to be visiting for a few days." The blue-haired girl looked at the digital display on her suit's wrist. "His train should be arriving in a few minutes actually."
"I didn't know the commander had a son."
"Most don't. But the commander sees this as an opportunity to introduce him to NERV and the vital work that we perform."
"Which essentially translates to me and you being playing babysitters for some rich brat."
Rei couldn't hold back the laugh, but composed herself quickly.
"Perhaps, though his file indicates that he is about our age." She touched a finger to her lips."But if he is still a brat then it will be amusing to see the major suffer along with us."
"Our age, huh?" The redhead leaned forward, intrigued. "What else does it say?"
"See for yourself." Rei dropped a manila folder into her lap, which the other girl promptly swiped.
"He got any powers?" Asuka asked after flipping through various pages.
"No, all accounts suggest that he is a rather reserved but otherwise normal teenage boy."
"Ugh, bo-ring" she stuck out her tongue, turning to photo collage of young Shinji. "He's so fucking scrawny, and does he wear anything besides that stupid uniform?"
Rei kept to herself, preferring to fix her gaze on the horizon.
"I don't know, but even those without our abilities have much to offer society."
"That's cute, you memorize the rest of the NERV brochure too?"
The albino was about to counter with her own witty retort, when a slight tremor shook the building, sending the box of candy tumbling over the edge.
"This friggin' country I swear. Can't walk to the store without an earthquake rolling through."
"That wasn't an earthquake." Rei's voice took on a grave aspect.
"Oh so you're a seismologist too now? Alright Richter, enlighten me then."
Ayanami stared at her quizzically.
"Hello? Charles Richter? Co-architect of the Richter magnitude scale?" Asuka waved her arms, annoyed. "Dammit, I didn't graduate college with a degree in physics to waste references on the likes of you!"
WOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooo
Both girls clutched their ears as the city-wide alarms went into full effect, the blaring klaxons overwhelming the young telepath and her German partner. After several seconds of suffering the deafening wail, they cautiously stood up.
"Aw fuck!" The Second growled, wiggling a finger inside of her ear. "What the hell was that about?"
Rei squinted between the buildings, swearing that she could see something moving between the high-rises. The First Child suddenly did something she hadn't thought possible since her early forays into super-heroics: she shivered.
"Definitely not an earthquake."
Locking eyes, the city's two protectors nodded and kicked off towards the source of the anomaly.
If Shinji had to guess, he would have to put the creature at around 15 stories in height. However, this neat little factoid currently lay tucked away in a dark mental recess as he held on to his seat for dear life.
"ROGER, LITTLE BIRD INBOUND AND READY TO ASSIST!" The VTOL's pilot shouted frantically into the headset, doing little to conceal his own fear. Clearly, the beast's sheer size was more than a little out of their comfort zone.
"Hey asshole, I've got a VIP here who needs outta here now!" The agent tried to gain his attention.
"FUCK YOU PAL, I'M NOT LEAVING THESE MEN FOR DEAD!" The co-pilot shot back.
It appeared in the water at first, the eastern shore batteries reported. Intermittent shouts and gunfire were heard, and then the line went silent. Now they weren't just listening to the fight, they were smack-dab in the middle.
Shinji didn't think it was possible for the soldiers around him to look more jaded, but those who weren't wide-eyed with terror wore the face of a man who'd seen enough for several lifetimes. Though he wasn't in the cockpit proper, the boy could hear the battle-net reports all the same.
"Alright Little Bird, you are cleared to engage over."
"THE BLOCK IS HOT, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR SOLDIER?" The co-pilot screamed at the weapons officer.
"Friendly fast-movers six o' clock high, check your fire over."
"I CAN'T GET A LOCK-ON SIR, OUR THERMAL'S FUCKED!" The gunner replied "SWITCHING TO ROCKET PODS!"
Shinji was treated to the ashen clouds of cordite clogging his airways as the VTOL fired volley after volley of fire-and-forget rockets at the beast. Following their example, the other flyers in the area opened up as well.
"REPORT, CORPORAL!"
"WE DIDN'T EVEN DENT THE FUCKING THING, SIR!"
What a waste, just call in the damn heroes already.
In truth, the barrage elicited but a curious look up from the monster, which had largely ignored their efforts up until this point. Shinji growing frustrated with his inability to get a good look from his position, unstrapped himself and stretched his head over the soldiers. The VTOL bucked, but he managed to catch a glimpse of its dark, sinewy profile, capped with a birdlike ivory face resting above a dull red orb.
If he concentrated, he could hear it breathing, its "chest" rising and falling in tandem with gill-like constructs on its abdomen. When it exhaled, it did so with a lion's bass and a whale's majesty, a truly alien and guttural declaration of war.
With surprising dexterity, it lifted its arm and shot out a lance of pink light through its palm, annihilating a nearby VTOL.
"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!" Their pilot veered erratically to the left, trying to put as much distance between them and the beast as possible.
The craft went into a nosedive, seemingly bent on crashing into a nearby apartment complex before stopping mere meters away from death. Shinji, unstrapped and ill-prepared for the abrupt halt, shot forward and careened into the cabin, eventually stumbling head-first into the windshield.
Rei balked, here she thought she'd just saved a random squad of soldiers from their fiery doom, only to come face-to-face with the commander's son grinning awkwardly at her from the other side of the bullet-proof pane. Shaking her head, she let go of the craft's nose.
I don't have time for this.
Concentrating, she focused on the pilot's eyes, bending the man to her will.
You, take this craft to the Geofront immediately. Ignore all other orders.
The man nodded, and Shinji traipsed back into the cabin to see the ghostly young woman in the white suit sail away.
"SIT THE FUCK DOWN!" The boy's handler shoved him back into his seat. "YOU PULL A STUNT LIKE THAT AGAIN AND YOU'RE DEAD!"
Shinji wiped the spittle from the man's rant off his face, but remained silent.
At least the heroes are here to handle it.
Asuka couldn't handle this.
Bomb-wielding terrorists? No problem.
Packs of mutated, feral animals? Easy-peasy.
A murderous half-ton crab? Friggin' cakewalk.
But THIS? This goddamn… thing that ate missiles and streamrolled tank battalions?
It was, she had to admit, a little out of her league.
She threw cars, rubble, used telephone poles as jumbo spears but she might as well have been tickling the fucking thing for all the effect it was having. Even the combined bombardment of an entire Air Defense Squadron only succeeded in pissing it off.
"RAAAGH!" She was beyond furious, her initial taunts and insults had long since degraded into primal fits of rage. Clapping her hands together, she launched a searing gout of flame directly at the monster's red core, only to see her efforts roll harmlessly off a barely visible hexagonal shield.
Sachiel, for his part, regarded the girl much in the same way a human might a mosquito: tiny, insignificant, but definitely annoying. Swinging wide, the creature brought its claw down to swat her, cleaving through another set of buildings in the process. Expecting its telegraphed blow, Asuka flew up into Sachiel's face, perching herself astride the space in between its "eyes."
Stretching out, she managed to place a hand on the surface of each inky void, snarling as she felt the formless buffer that thwarted her before.
If this doesn't work…
Clearing her head of all distractions, Asuka Langely Sorhyu channeled her remaining energy through her arms. Slowly but surely, she felt the protective shield give way to the blistering flames, and she laughed like a woman possessed.
"HAHA, WHAT'S THE MATTER BIG GUY? CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT?"
Having had quite enough of the irritating zit on its face, Sachiel simply picked up the squabbling girl between its analogue of a thumb and forefinger. Blinking curiously, it sent her flying away with a disinterested flick.
Rei Ayanami hovered in place as she watched her friend tumble end over end through the sky before crash landing, carving a deep gouge in the asphalt.
How reckless, yet inevitable.
Wonder Girl shook her head in disappointment but returned to her fighting pose. After all, there was still a fight to finish. Molding the moisture in the air around heri nto icy spikes running down her arms, she turned to end Sachiel's rampage…
Thankfully, I seem to have maintained that element of surprise.
…and caught a sheer pink lance the size of a school bus in the eye.
Shinji recoiled in horror from the cabin as he saw the two girls bravely fight against the titanic beast below. He nearly whooped when he saw his blue-haired savior come to the other's rescue, but his jaw slacked when the monster then proceeded to effortlessly dispose of the pair in under a minute.
"WE GOTTA MOVE MAN, GET YOUR ASS IN GEAR!" The co-pilot yelled to his partner, who coasted the craft lazily in the hostile airspace.
"I am directing the craft to the Geofront as instructed" he replied in a monotone, his eyes glowing softly.
"GAME OVER MAN, GAME OVER!" Another soldier whimpered as he watched ship after ship crash violently in the wake of Sachiel's destruction.
"THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU, GIVE IT HERE!" The co-pilot attempted to wrench the controls away from his brainwashed partner, causing the ship to climb.
The young Ikari, meanwhile, clenched and unclenched his fist anxiously.
There's gotta be something I can do!
Shinji stood up, brushing off the beleaguered Section-2 Agent's cries. A battle Tokyo-3 was decidedly losing still raged underneath, and if, if, he could do something, then he'd just have to take that chance. He squeezed in between the soldiers at the edge of the craft's door, gulping at the nauseating bird's-eye view.
"Hey!" the agent grabbed him by his shoulder, unknowingly pushing Shinji just a bit closer to the edge. "What the hell do you think you're doing, kid?"
Though the skill would develop in time, Shinji was simply not very good at morale-boosting speeches or even witty one-liners on the spot. Pressed for time, he settled for honesty.
"I dunno."
The VTOL lurched forward violently and then Shinji's legs caught nothing but air, his choice having been made for him.
Misato Katsuragi was late. Scratch that, very fucking late. A beer run and chance hookup with Kaji late last night left her hopelessly playing catch-up on what was probably going to go down as a "career-defining" fuck up. Not that her chosen profession usually revolved around ferrying children through the city, but everyone knew that when the commander asked you for a favor personally, it was likely an offer you couldn't refuse.
Can't complain about the traffic though.
The immediate area around the first sighting of whatever mysterious creature was raiding the city had been cleared by a radius of several kilometers. This left the inside perimeter populated only by the beast, retreating soldiers, and idiots.
And this idiot's shiny new car!
Misato shifted into a higher gear and gunned the engine towards the train station, the purported destination of the boy she was supposed to pick up along with Rei and Asuka.
"Speaking of which," she muttered to herself, activating the dash-mounted phone. "Wonder Girl, Red Eagle, I'm about to link up with our VIP, where are you two?"
Nothing but static. It was a bad omen as the First made it a point to always answer on the first ring, but Misato held on the wheel resolutely. She managed another three blocks before the asphalt became too damaged to drive over, forcing her to turn around to find another way through. The back streets were choked with rubble, but the main thoroughfare was remarkably clear.
Flashing a frenzied –might just get out of this alive- smile behind her sunglasses, Misato burned rubber once more.
CRRRACK!
A massive green two-toed foot thundered in front of the blue sports car, making Misato swerve frantically and wonder aloud in peppered expletives how such a giant managed to sneak up on her. Losing control, the auto barreled into a department store, leaving the driver to drunkenly stumble out.
Wiping the grit from her eyes, the purple-haired major quickly realized the futility of her actions, the shadow of a gargantuan green sole engulfing her. Tucking herself into a fetal ball, she wept bitter prayers into the dusty street as her end came.
And then it didn't.
The monster tripped, on nothing it seemed, and slammed face first into the pavement. What few pilots were still in the air noticed its clawing strikes at point beside its shoulder, all pretenses of calculated destruction forgotten. Misato, climbing onto an upended van, watched as the nigh-invincible creature struggled on the ground
Oh God, it's one of the girls!
There was a single sickening crack, and she saw Sachiel's jerky movements subside in intensity. Shifting spasmodically onto its side, it let out a final cetacean wail, and was no more.
Resisting the urge to whoop, Misato galloped as quickly as her slight limp would allow to the titan's fallen corpse.
"Asuka! Rei!" She called out, her cries echoing across the fresh battlefield. "Anyone!"
Even at fifteen meters away, she held her nose and forced her lunch down, the dark fluid streaming from the body giving off a rancid odor. The woman had to stop and cup her mouth, however, when she saw what caused the monster's sudden death.
A hole, about five feet in diameter, had been punched clean through the beast, starting at the tip of its spine and ripping explosively through the now-dormant orb in its belly.
Okay, that rules out any possibility of NERV involvement.
Putting the thoughts of who or what exactly was capable of killing something on this scale in one fell swoop in the back of her mind, Misato set to work. Squinting and estimating the trajectory of an object to come down at such an extreme angle, she followed her gaze to a nearby crater, which itself was rife with the stench of alien death.
Cautiously peeking over the rim, she found neither Red nor Blue to greet her. Instead, it was a soaked brown head, quickly followed by curious blue eyes and a speechless grin.
"Hi," he offered her his shaky hand, still dripping with Sachiel's remnants "I'm-"
"I-I know!" She sputtered, the day catching up with her. "I know who you are."
"Oh, cool."
He quickly retracted his hand and attempted to clean it on his pant leg, only succeeding in smearing the oily ichor around.
"Hey wait a sec" he shook a finger at the nearly-catatonic woman, pulling a crumpled picture out of his pants. "Misato Katsuragi, is it?"
She nodded dumbly, hoping- No, hoping and praying that she hadn't sent gag jerkoff material to the boy she and the rest of the city owed their lives to.
"We should get back." She managed to scrounge a few bits of her composure. "The commander probably wants to know about all-" Misato gestured at the stinking carcass "- this."
"Ah, say no more" the boy, slick with inky slime, clambered out of his hole and began walking alongside her. "So where's your car?"
"Where's my car?" She didn't know if the kid was trying to be funny or just plain stupid. "Some hero, you too good to fly now that you lost your cape?"
"Lost my cape? What the-" Shinji rubbed his face with his palms, breathing deeply. "Look ma'am-"
"Miss Katsuragi" she interjected, suddenly feeling very self-conscious about her age. "Or Misato, whichever one you prefer."
"Right, Miss Misato. Two things: I don't wear a cape and I don't fly."
"Bullshit, what do you expect to believe? That you fell from space?"
"Well…" he scratched his head "it wasn't exactly space, but it was pretty high up."
Misato could only shake her head and laugh. She was getting too old-
Hey!
…too tired for this shit.
"Must've been going pretty fast to do any damage with these" she teasingly squeezed his rather spindly arms.
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight," his eyes took on a steely expression "it's the size of the fight in the dog."
Misato couldn't meet his gaze for more than a second without doubling over in laughter.
"Oh my god, that's adorable. Be honest, how long did you spend practicing that in front of a mirror?"
"A couple hours" he grumbled, kicking a pebble.
"Oh yeah, definitely going on your trading card and that's final."
"Trading card?"
"All members of the Heroes Association get their own limited edition trading card put into circulation." She recited from memory.
"I'm gonna be a Hero?" He asked, looking up at the blank sky.
"Shinji," she patted him on the back "you're gonna be a legend."
A/N: If you've got questions, I've got answers. Hopefully.
Never learned to code: Yeah, I'm a fan of some of their stuff too, though the whole "Shinji & Co. Get Superpowers" is sort of a subgenre unto itself around here, hence the creation of this fic. Though I've no quotes from that callipygian Superman to respond with, I think you'll be hard-pressed to find a worthwhile fic where a company that employs what amount to child soldiers isn't painted with at least a few strokes of gray.
graycoder: Yup, I originally planned to mention it in the description but decided to omit it and see how long it took for someone to point it out as I dropped bigger hints. So yeah, thanks for being a willing participant in that little experiment. There may be more references and a few cameos throughout, along with a larger emphasis on OPM's comedic tone, but the fic overall is overwhelmingly grounded in favor of Eva.
StraightEdgeWingZero: -shrug- Can't please everyone, but as graycoder pointed out, the other source I'm biting for this story isn't DC or Marvel but an online manga called One-Punch Man. I'll leave you to figure out what the title character's, and by proxy Shinji's, abilities are based on that.
