All Roads Lead Here by Teenage Anomaly

A/N: I'm baaaacccck. This chapter is veryveryvery important, for reasons you'll discover later. Not terrible long, but important. PLEASE REVIEW.


She's not a girl who misses much
She's well acquainted with the touch of the velvet hand
Like a lizard on a window pane

I need a fix 'cause I'm going down
Down to the bits that I left uptown
I need a fix cause I'm going down
Mother Superior jump the gun
Mother Superior jump the gun

Happiness is a warm gun
Happiness is a warm gun, momma
When I hold you in my arms
And when I feel my finger on your trigger
I know nobody can do me no harm
Because happiness is a warm gun, momma


Chapter Three: A Gun Makes a Girl a God

They set up their camp around sunset, though they all doubted they would get much sleep. Katty was sitting in between Sayid and Charlie, playing absentmindedly with the grass, and every now and then she looked up to see Sawyer staring with an intense, unreadable expression at her from over the fire. His expression didn't change whenever she caught him staring, and she quickly learned not to look.

She had unnerved him, she knew. She unnerved most people.

But the gun sticking out of her denims was a consolation, if an empty one, seeing as Sawyer had the clip.

Sayid dropped a rock on the ground and pulled a stick from the fire.

"This is Australia," he said, indicating the rock, "and this is us."

"Nice stick," said Sawyer sarcastically. Sayid ignored him.

"Two days ago we take off from Sydney. We fly along the same northeast route every commercial airliner bound for Los Angeles does. Now the pilot, he said he lost communication with the ground, correct?"

"Six hours in," answered Kate. Katty lay down on her stomach, drowning out the conversation she'd already heard, staring at the fire. Her thoughts were consumed with worry, fear, and memories of the past month, the month that, really, had defined who she was. And now she was here, and it seemed, in one fell blow, to be the beginning, but it was the end of something, too.

Funny how often those two things coincide.

"… how long was it, freckles?"

"Sixteen years."

"Right. Let's talk about that."

"We have to tell the others when we get back-" began Boone, but he was cut off.

"Tell them what, exactly?" spat his sister.

"What we heard-"

"You didn't hear anything. I'm not a stupid translator-"

"What do you think would happen if we told them, Boone?" said Katty suddenly, staring into the fire. All heads swiveled to look at her. "They'd panic. You tell them that, you take away any hope they have of getting off the island."

"And hope is a very dangerous thing to loose," finished Sayid.

"So we lie."

Katty looked up at Kate, who was staring into the fire with an unhappy look on her face, and a twisted smile formed on her own pale, sunburned features.

"No. We omit."

Kate shook her head. "It's the same thing."

"Well, what would you rather do? Tell them that, now, right after we just got here? Take away all their hopes an' dreams of ever seeing their families and the people they love again? We all know that not all of us are gonna make it off, Kate, but they don't need to know that." Katty shook her head. "Not yet."

There was a very pregnant pause before Boone said, "You seem to know an awful lot-"

Katty laughed, and it was a cold, humorless sound that chilled them all. "Holmes, I know an awful lot more than you think I know. G'night."

With that, she pulled the flimsy airplane blanket over her shoulders and closed her eyes.

She was snoring lightly within minutes.

---

Katty awoke with a gasp and sat bolt upright, banging her head against Boone's. She swore loudly, falling back into the grass and clutching her forehead.

"What the hell was that?" she hissed, eyes welling with tears of pain. Boone's face was shocked and apologetic, his beautiful eyes wide.

Sayid sat up with a gasp. "What are you doing?" he snarled at Boone.

"Standing guard! You heard what they said's out there!"

"You take my clip off me, boy?" growled Sawyer. Katty reached her hand around to her back, where she'd stuck the empty gun- but all she felt was her goose-bump covered skin and the rough fabric of her jeans. She looked quickly at Boone to see him gingerly holding the clip and gun in separate hands. He held them like he obviously wasn't comfortable with them, his big hands folding awkwardly around them. Katty was now more than a little irritated, and she also felt a bit violated, seeing as the gun had been stuck in the back of her pants.

"Please, you've never even held a gun-"

"Give it to me," snapped Sayid. Sawyer rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, give it to Al Jeezera, he'll protect us."

"Al Jeezera is a network," said Charlie blearily, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

"I'll keep the damn gun-"

"Give it to her."

Kate was looking right at Katty as she said this. Katty, who never wanted to see a gun again, much less hold one, furrowed her eyebrows.

Shannon seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "Her? She's just a kid-!"

"Give 'er the damn gun!" snapped Sawyer, stepping up to Boone, who stared at him, shocked. "Believe me, she knows how to use it."

"Yeah, give it to Katty," agreed Charlie. "She's the most innocent of all of us." He winked at her, and she grinned at him.

"Sure about that?" she asked cheekily and he raised his eyebrows suggestively. She laughed.

Boone shrugged and handed her the clip and gun, and she injected the clip without looking at the piece of metal, then stuck it back in her jeans. The cool metal made a fresh wave of goose-bumps break out and she shivered.

"I want to go to sleep," she told them, and lay with her back to the rest of them.

---

Day Two

It didn't take Sayid very long to catch Katty the next morning, as the group continued the hike down the mountain.

She was in the middle of the group, not talking to anyone. She was in a haze brought on by shock and mental exhaustion and emotion pain. She wasn't really thinking of anything, and when Sayid reached her, one look at her told him that she was lost in another world, or perhaps a memory.

"Katty?"

She started, coming out of the haze and looked at him.

"What is it?"

"Are you alright?"

He was concerned for her. She was only a child, despite her physical appearance. She nodded, a slight smile curving her lips.

"Yeah. It's just been a long month."

Sayid laughed. "Yes, I can understand how that might be."

She laughed too, making a tired, resigned movement with her head.

"It's hard t' believe this is all happening," she said quietly, looking at the jungle floor in front of her. Sayid said nothing, waiting for her to continue.

"I mean, I know it's weird for everyone else too, and this is gonna sound so selfish, but it's worse for me. I know what's gonna happen, who's gonna die, who's gonna hook up, and I'm scared to change things. It's a kind of damned if you do, damned if you don't thing, you know?"

She glanced up at him finally, and there was fear in her eyes, but also resignation and determination. Sayid had never seen eyes like hers.

"I'm scared, Sayid."

He stopped walking and grasped her by the chin, forcing her to raise her eyes to his.

"But you are not alone," he said softly. She smiled, reveling in the feel of skin on skin contact.

"Misery does love company."

---

"You not interested in hearin' Cap'n Sayid tell 'bout our epic journey then?" asked Sawyer, leaning against a palm tree as Katty struggled to haul over a piece of the plane that was bigger than her. She looked up at him, brushing a sweaty piece of hair out of her eyes with a grin. She'd pulled it back into a half ponytail, and she looked like she could use a shower.

"I wouldn't really call it epic."

She propped up the two pieces of metal she had pulled over against the tree, then pulled the tarp over them and tied it down. Sawyer frowned.

"This looks awful permanent t' me, tiger."

She looked up at him again, but didn't say anything. He sighed.

"Hell, d'ya need help, kid?"

She smiled at him. "Help would be nice, yeah."

---

An hour later they sat in Katty's new home- Sawyer called it Midgettown. When Katty heard him call it that the first time, they were sticking wooden poles in the sand for structure, she had laughed for five minutes straight, lying in the sand and clutching her sides.

She glanced at him now, leaning against an airplane seat she had stuck inside. She couldn't believe he was actually taking an interest in her- after all, she was sixteen, and while not ugly, didn't have the unearthly beauty that Kate or any one of Sawyer's love interests did. Plus she was… well, Katty. Apart from being stuck in a TV show, she wasn't all that interesting.

Sawyer sighed and stood up. "I'll be right back, midge."

She nodded and took advantage of his absence by sitting in the airplane seats. He returned a few minutes later with two mini alcohol bottles in his hands and glared at her as he sat down by her feet.

"Stole my seat," he grumbled, handing her a bottle. She took it.

"It's my house," she reminded him. He turned to stare at her.

"Yeah, that I helped build!"

She shrugged. "Didn't ask fer yer help."

He took a swig of the alcohol, then looked at her. "You ever drunk before, kid?"

She hesitated. "Once or twice."

"Alriight. Got me a virgin." He turned to her with a grin. "Wanna play 'I never'?"

"Sure."

He scoffed. "You even know what it is?"

She pointed the bottle at him. "I'll start."

He raised an eyebrow as she pulled the cork out of the bottle and tapped it against her chin, then shook her head.

"Never mind. I can't think of anything. You start."

He smirked. "I never flirted wiv an Arab so I'd be sure to be in on all the action."

She glowered at him, then took a sip of the alcohol. Sawyer was surprised to hear her cough, eyes watering as she looked at the bottle through red-rimmed eyes.

"Whiskey?" she gasped, eyes still watering.

Sawyer chuckled. "Can ya hold it down, kid?"

"You bet."

She took a deep breath. "Hmm. I never flirted with a sixteen year old because I thought she could protect me."

She smirked at him, and he saw a flash of something in her face, a flash of something mysterious… and dangerous.

Sawyer sighed and drank. The whiskey felt good, numbing as it burned its way down his throat. He looked at the bottle for a minute, then looked back up at the girl sitting before him, smirking a little. She raised her eyebrows at him and he thought again how young she looked. It was weird that the only thing close to a friend he had in the world was a teenager he'd met not three days ago. A weird, female teenager.

"I never fell in love."

She drank without hesitation and he furrowed his eyebrows. "Yer too young to fall in love!"

"Tell that to someone else, Sawyer, cause I know better. Now, let me think…" She tapped the bottle against her chin.

"I never wore pink."

So I got it from Kate, so what?

He glowered at her, only to get her answering smirk. He rolled his eyes and drank at the same time she did. He smirked.

"I never kissed a man."

Katty shrugged and took a swig, then smirked, looking at the ground.

"I never played 'I never' with someone to get them drunk so I could get some answers."

Her eyes snapped up to his, and a crooked smile slid across her pretty, sun burned face. Sawyer was stunned. Okay, so he'd never been very subtle, but he thought he was better at being sneaky than that. He was a conman, after all.

But this girl was too damned smart for her own good.

Sawyer shook his head and took a drink.

And, unsmiling, looking him straight in the eyes, so did she.

"Well," she said, after setting the bottle on the ground. "I guess we got somethin' in common after all."

---

After Sawyer fell asleep, I watched him for a few minutes, head buzzing pleasantly. I felt greasy and dirty, and wanted a new bra. I heaved myself to my feet with a sigh and pulled another bra out of my suitcase. While I was digging around in the over-packed duffel bag, my hand brushed something cold and metallic- and my heart stopped. I tried to pretend I didn't know what it was. I tried to pretend it wasn't mine. And I tried to pretend that I didn't know what it had done.

As I slid out of the bra I had been wearing, I noticed something that was stuck to my breast- the Marshal's key. I looked at it, head spinning. I knew that, tonight, one way or the other, the Marshal was gonna die.

After putting my shirt back on, I stuck the key back in the new bra and strode out of the tent and into the jungle, stomach tingling like it always did when I was about to do something stupid.

It didn't take me very long to find the pond. I recognized the waterfall and stripped down to my underclothes quickly and then stood at the edge of the water, switching my weight from one foot to the other, delaying actually getting in. I stood there, feeling the harsh heat of the sun on my skin, biting my lips, wringing my hands and staring at the tranquil looking water. Horror stories of alligators and water monsters ran through my head, and I was scared. I was too good at scaring myself, and the alcohol couldn't have helped. I took a deep breath.

"Okay, Katty, pull yourself together. You'll be fine. Just jump in. Just jump in. Oh, crap…"

I almost turned around and left then, but before I could, I made myself wade in up to my waist- the water was surprisingly cool- before diving in.

The water felt amazing, and my irrational fears, though still present, faded as I enjoyed myself. I saw a few fish and a water snake as I swam through the cool water, looking for the case.

It didn't take me very long to find it, and after I did, I swam to the surface and pulled the suitcase behind me as I perched on a rock and opened it.

I only took a box of ammo. I had a gun of my own, and I'd given Kate the gun back this morning, on the way back from the beach, to make sure things would happen the way they were supposed to.

I hid the ammo under a bush and dove back into the water with the suitcase.

---

It was sunset.

The sky was a stunning mural of orange and pink, and the colors of the blood-red sun and sky reflected off the deep blue water.

Katty stood on the beach, her gun sticking out of her jeans, arms crossed, staring at the ocean.

She could hear the Marshal coughing in the distance, and winced.

The cold metal of the gun that was pressed against her back seemed to be laughing at her. She wondered, why the hell did I get this is the first place?

Now she just had to work up the courage to put a dying man out of misery.

---

The rain was pouring down, and Jack and Kate were arguing.

"Will it be quick?" she asked him finally. Katty stood off in the distance, out of sight, listening hard. Her stomach was tingling and her heart was pounding.

Jack shook his head. "No, it won't be quick. Three, maybe four days."

"And he'll feel it?"

"Yeah, he'll feel it."

Katty walked away, rainwater dripping down her face. Her clothes were soaking wet.

She pushed back the flap of her 'home' to see Sawyer sprawled across her makeshift bed, snoring loudly, sound asleep.

Katty smiled and knelt next to him, just looking at him for a minute. He looked exhausted. She pulled the blanket over him.

Rising to her feet, she walked over to where she had stashed her bag and pulled out a pair of sweat pants and a tank top. Glancing at Sawyer one last time to make sure he was asleep, she cast off her damp clothing and pulled on the dry set. The gun fell to the ground and she turned to pick it up, meeting Sawyer's now open eyes. She froze.

"What happened to your back, kid?" He asked quietly, his eyes searching hers. She didn't say anything, just grabbed the gun and stuck it in her pants.

"None of your business, Sawyer."

"Nah," he said, sitting up. "I s'pose it isn't. See ya, kid."

With a wave and a smile, he left the tent, leaving Katty standing stock still, staring at the place where he had been lying.

---

She heard the yelling, heard the gunshot. She was pacing in front of her tent, and when she saw Sawyer emerge from the Marshal's tent, she made up her mind in a second.

She ran towards them as Jack began yelling at Sawyer.

"What did you do?!"

"What you couldn't. Look, I get where you're coming from being a doctor and all, but he wanted it. Hell, he asked me. So, I don't like it any more than you do, but something had to be done."

Katty skidded next to Jack, sliding on the sand. She grasped the doctor's bicep to keep from falling and he looked down at her quizzically.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Katty," she said. "Excuse me."

She walked into the tent. The Marshal's eyes were open, and they sought her out feverishly. He smiled deliriously.

Her heart was pounding.

"Goodbye, Edward," she said, as Jack and Sawyer ran into the tent. She pointed the gun at his head.

"NO-"

Her finger closed around the trigger before Jack could stop her, and the kick vibrated up her arm. The deafening 'bang' echoed across the beach, and the Marshal ceased moving.

Katty stood over him, a pang in her over-paced heart. She was shaking, an ugly grimace on her bone white face, and it felt like something was crawling up her arms.

"Kid…"

Sawyer stood next to her and put a hand on her shoulder. She turned to him, eyes wide and dry, and took a deep breath, head bowed, trying to regain control. Her head was an inch from Sawyer's chest and he hugged her to him after a moment's hesitation as Jack knelt over the Marshal and closed his eyes.

The girl's arms lung limply to her sides as Sawyer held her, her right hand still clenched tightly around the gun.

-Flashback-

Katty was lost. She was in Venice and had been separated from the group she was with. People pushed all around her, chattering in languages she didn't understand, and she was about to start crying. She didn't know anyone, she didn't know what to do or who to turn to for help, and she was scared out of her mind. Frantically she pulled a map of the city and began scrutinizing it.

"Are you lost, kid?"

She looked up sharply to see a man in his late twenties smiling down at her. She nodded, embarrassed.

"Yeah."

"Here. Let me help you. Were do you need to go?"

"I'm trying to get back to the Marriot."

He laughed. "A fellow American, huh? I live around the Marriot. I'll take ya. C'mon, kid."

He led her through the crowds and she, ignoring all of her instincts, which were screaming at her to run, followed him.

TBC...


"Happiness is a Warm Gun" by the Beatles