"Are you sure about this Bella?"

Charlie looks at me intently, and the seriousness of it unnerves me. The two of us sit at the kitchen table with identical mugs of coffee, our plates empty. Charlie is in his uniform, about to go to work, and I feel as though I'm being interrogated.

"Yes," I reply. "I want to go to Seattle for college. It's a good school, and it's close to home. I've already looked for places to stay close to the city and I have a job lined up. I've thought about this for ages. I've planned it."

He nods once and looks down at my acceptance letter. "As long as you're sure, hon."

There is a knock on the door. I frown, who would be here so early? But Charlie doesn't seem surprised when he goes to get the door. I heard him have a distant conversation with someone, and the voices come closer.

"-breakfast." Charlie was saying. "It's early, so help yourself. Bella always cooks too much."

"No, I'm fine thanks Charlie. It's best I just get started."

My heart stops. I knew that voice.

Sam suddenly appears in the kitchen. He is carrying a tool box and wearing a shirt that accentuates his chest. I look down at myself, wearing tracksuit pants and a shirt with holes in it. We look at each other and I feel too warm.

"Hello Bella," he greets, a smile in his eyes.

"Sam," I say surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"I asked Sam to check on the house," Charlie says, unaware of the tension that's suddenly filled the room. "I just want to make sure everything is up to date and all that."

I nod mutely, hiding my face in my coffee cup. I excuse myself and rush to my room, leaving them to talk, feeling Sam's eyes on me.

Standing in front of my bedroom mirror, I appraised myself. I look better now. The summer floral dress was tight, my chest showed off nicely. I smooth out my skirt. I was too angly. Not thin exactly, but my arms and legs were long. My chest was good. I touch my behind, which felt too flat. I peered at my face, so pale.

I sigh and look away, refusing to analyse myself for the rest of the day. Who cares how I look? Why am I dressing up at all?

I hid in my room like a coward, too scared to leave. Charlie had gone to work a few hours ago and I could hear Sam moving about in the house.

It's my house, I didn't know why I was so hesitant.

I threw my bedroom door open in a burst of courage, expecting him to be there, but nothing. I sighed and padded down the stairs.

He was in the kitchen, under the sink and looking at something intently as he switched between several tools I didn't know the name of.

"Did you want something to drink?" I ask.

He jerks in surprise and I hear a loud thunk followed by a moan. Sam comes out from under the sink, rubbing his head. "Where did you come from?"

I smile. His eyes run up my bare legs all the way to my face as he stands up. He wasn't wearing a shirt, just his jeans, and I realise I have never seen Sam completely naked. "So, drink?"

He shakes his head. "No, thanks, I'm good."

I open the cabinet and get a glass, feeling his eyes on my back and I pour myself a glass of juice. "So, how does the house look?"

"Good, mostly. I fixed up your sink, the only think that needs to be retouched is the wood on the deck."

I nod, slowly taking a drink. Did that mean he would have to come back?

I cleared my throat. "While you're here, the window in my room- it looks as though termites have eaten it or something. Would you mind taking a look?"

He looks at me, and I look at him over my drink trying to be innocent.

"Sure," he says slowly. "Lead the way."

We are silent as we go. In my bedroom, Sam examines my window as I sit at the foot of the bed, watching him. His back muscle flex as he moves, and my hand twitches, wanting to run my fingers over the smooth dark skin. God, what was wrong with me? I never use to be so lustful.

After a few moments he turns and looks at me, a twinkle in his eye, "Your window is fine."

"I know," I say boldly, but my face flushes at the attempt.

He walks over to me and leans down. "Then why am I in you room?"

My slender hands come up to rest on either side of his face and he blinks at the contact. I pull his face to mine and kiss him hard to answer his question. At first he kisses me back just as passionately, but then pulls away. "Bella… what are we doing?"

I give him a meaningful look, my hand running over his bare abdomen. He shivers. "I want you."

He kneels on the ground between my legs, his hands resting on my knees. "I want you too, but what is this?"

I slid my hands over his. "I have no idea, but I want to find out."

Our lips crush together. It's hesitant at first, gentle, but it quickly becomes hard and urgent. My hands grip his dark hair- his beautiful dark hair- and I pull him close, needing to feel him entirely. His hands are on my thighs, snaking under my dress, close to the edges of my underwear. He begins to kiss my jaw, then the crook of my neck. I let out a small moan at the sensation.

Feeling bold, I begin to undo his pants. His breath hitches in my ear as my fingers run along the exposed skin of his waist.

He pulls away from kissing my neck to look at me.

"Are you okay?" I ask, breathless. He doesn't answer me. He grabs the ends of my dress and pulls it off in a swift motion. I was not wearing a bra. Sam stares at me, completely exposed, his eyes going dark.

"Lay back," he commands, and I do without thinking.

I become aware of his hand slipping into my underwear and my hips go up automatically to meet him. But instead of touching me where I want him too, he pulls my underwear off, discarding them on the floor.

His hands part my knees wider. Then his face disappears and his tongue touches me, making me legs shake. "Oh…" I moan. I feel as though I'm falling and I try to grip onto something, anything. It slides up and down excruciatingly slow, perfectly slow. I had never been touched like this before, but I couldn't feel self conscious, too caught up in the act. Something begins to build up in my stomach and Sam's hands grasp my legs to keep me from floating away, 'Sam!"

One of my hands grasps the back of his head, and this motivates him to pick up the pace. My body shakes violently and my mind goes numb as I'm hit by a wave of pleasure. "Oh! Oh…"

Sam stands up and looks down at me, completely flushed and out of breath and naked. "Come here," I whisper to him. He pulls his pants and underwear off. He is hard and it makes my heart race. He was completely naked in my room. My hand touches him, and he closes his eyes at the contact. "Come here," I whisper again.

He leans over me on the bed, between my legs. I shiver as he goes in, my hands gripping onto his back. I move my hips to meet his, wanting him to go deeper.

It's different from the car, that was hard and it was fast. This time, the two of us are completely breathless even though it's slow. I barely notice anything that's going on around me, only focusing on him as he moves above me.

His eyes bore in to mine and I feel like I'm going to fall to pieces under his gaze.


Sam lays on top of me in between my legs, his head on my chest. Our naked bodies intertwined in my bedsheets. We are both silent, catching our breath. It was a freezing day but his contact made me warm. "Bella, are you a virgin?"

I laughed. "Sam, that's a funny thing to ask me after we've had sex. Yes Sam, I'm a virgin. Having sex with you has restored my virginity."

He laughed with me, his chest vibrating on mine as he looks up at me. "You know what I mean. Were you a virgin before me?" My silence makes him nervous, I can tell. He leave his spot on my chest and kisses me lightly between my breasts. "What is it?"

I run my hands through his hair. "Are you worried being with someone who's been with multiple partners?"

"No, not at all. I guess I'm curious about you." His fingers begin to trace circles along my bare stomach, but even this doesn't calm me down.

"Were you a virgin?" I blurt out. Of course he isn't, stupid.

"No," he looks at me, at my frown. "I've upset you, I'm sorry. It really doesn't matter how many partners you've been with."

I bit my lip and Sam kisses my stomach, the conversation already forgotten.

"You."

"Hm?"

I take a deep breath. "I've only been with you. I was a virgin that night in your car." He stops kissing me. My heart thumps. Sam looks up, his dark eyes giving away nothing as he processes this. "I mean," I continue, "I've done things. And I've had opportunities, but…. I don't know. It just felt like the right time then." He is still looking at me, assessing me. "What is it?" He pulls away from me and falls on his back beside me. I instantly missed the contact. "Are you upset?"

"Yes, but not with you," he says quickly.

"What? Why?"

He props himself up on one elbow to look down at me. "I wish you had a better experience. One that wasn't in a car."

I laugh. "What are you on about? The location doesn't matter."

"I just…. I don't know, maybe it should have been more romantic."

He isn't looking at me, still thinking.

I push him lightly so he is on his back and straddle him in a swift movement. He is surprised, but doesn't fight back, his hands automatically resting on my hips. "I don't want to focus on the past. I want to focus on this."

"And what exactly is this?"

I sigh. "I don't want to have that conversation. I just need to... I don't want any labels."

His eyebrows raised in surprise. "So... this is more of a friends with benefits type thing?"

I guide his warm hands to my bare breasts. "Exactly."