Up and down, her body moves over and over again. Wet warmth swallows and sucks repeatedly. She pants with each movement; small breasts bouncing, pink nipples erect. The fingers entwined with mine squeeze each time she goes down. All I can do is grit my teeth as I feel the soft bumps and ridges within her rub and squeeze me.

Suddenly, her back arches, and she gasps as she squeezes down on me. Heat and pressure, like the center of the sun, feels like it will fuse us together. Slowly, she lets go and she leans over me again. Her cheeks are red, eyes are sleepy, and a tired smile is on her face. She lowers herself to my face, and kisses me again. The hand that almost crushed my fingers with her orgasm rest in my palms, limply. But, even during her gradual descent from ecstasy, her hips grind against mine. I am rubbed against her insides; softly, warmly, gently.

Huh… is this it? Shinozaki seems to be finished, but my member is still fully erect. The gentle pleasure gradually turns to teasing, and the lack of ecstasy grows into a small annoyance. Come to think of it, up till now, she's been the one doing everything. True, it didn't feel bad, but I want to try somethings to. After all, I was never one to just sit there and take it.

A cheeky smirk turns the corners of my mouth upwards. Shinozaki continues kissing me, obliviously.

As she grinds against me again, I thrust forwards. It was a light jab, but the forward motion of her hips combined with it sends me deeper than I've ever went. There, something hard touches me lightly at the end.

"Kya!"

Her mouth breaks off from mine as she squeaks in surprise. I blink in surprise as well. What is this? I poke at the hard object inside her, and she spasms again. It feels like cartilage; hard, but slightly flexible. I prod at it slowly, and my member slip off it into a spongy wall. Shinozaki squeezes her eyes shut, and trembles in response.

The hard thing inside her is like a hill; a small firm point in the middle with soft valleys around it.

A smile crawls across my face as I watch her shiver and tremble from my prodding. She's been having her way with me this entire time. A little pay back isn't too much to ask, right?

I pull back a bit, and then hit the hard part within her a little stronger than before.

Shinozaki's eyes snap open. The fingers that were resting on mine limply squeeze down.

"That hurts, stupid!" She glares at me; brow furrowed, teeth bared.

I can only blink in response. The change in emotion is too quick. Gradually, the casual cheeky side of me cools down, and I open my mouth to apologize. But, she doesn't allow me to. Her mouth covers mine as I open it, and she ravishes me with her mouth as before. Hot gusts of air tickle my cheek, as she plunges her tongue into my mouth, as if in revenge for me poking her. Finally, she pulls back, breathing heavily.

"You're no good at this, so just let me do it."

… Ouch...

I lie there for a moment as Shinozaki shifts herself on top of me. Half of me wants to curl up in a corner and cry. The other half is still standing to attention and enjoying it as she shifts and twists on top of me. Of course, they are my upper and lower halves, but man… that one stung.

I guess I am a virgin, so I'm not the best partner in the world, but still… Well, Shinozaki always liked getting to the point, and she's still connected to me, but... Ugh. There was no way for me to avoid this situation. I didn't want to do it with anyone else, and I wasn't going to do it while she was sleeping.

"Kishinuma-kun." She looks down at me, slightly quizzical. I guess, I'm still a bit shell shocked. She lets go of my left hand, and reaches down to stroke my cheek.

"Kishinuma-kun. It's alright." "Kishinuma-kun… It's alright."

Two images overlap each other. Shinozaki overlaps with a different Shinozaki. Black void overlaps with a girly room.

Headaches. My vision sparks and flashes from them. Static covers my vision, and I grunt in pain.

"It's alright Kishinuma-kun. Relax." "It's alright Kishinuma-kun. Relax."

The same words. The same voice. But, the sources are different.

A chill runs down my spine, and I look up Shinozaki. Two of her look at me. One is naked, and has her hair untied. The other is in her school uniform, and her hair in pigtails. Both are straddled over my waist, but one is a memory, and the other is from right now.

"Kishinuma-kun?"

The overlap fades, and only one Shinozaki asks a question.

I remember that scene. I don't know how long ago it happened, but I remember when and where it happened.

It was the second time I entered Shinozaki's house. While I was catching up on what had happened in the real world, due to the week I lost inside the Nirvana. I received a folder full of documents and newspaper clippings from Niwa. In it, I learned of the new past that Shinozaki received after losing her original one. In one of the later documents, I found out her sister was raped and murdered before her eyes.

I lost it.

I ran all the way to her house, and there, I ended up trapped in an illusion. An illusion that was meant to keep Shinozaki safe.

I learned of this later, but Shinozaki wasn't alone when she returned from the Nirvana. A spirit, Sachi, tagged along with her. That spirit was of an unborn child, and attacked the others and me a number of times for entertainment.

Because Sachi was an unborn child, she wanted a body. She wanted to experience the world with flesh and blood, and not just as a spirit. She possessed Satoshi's sister, Yuka, in order to do that. She took over her body, and then tried to murder Satoshi with it.

That Sachi was now stuck with Shinozaki, and she still wanted a body. For some reason, she couldn't take over Shinozaki's body, so her only option was to make a new one… using Shinozaki's body.

The illusion I was caught in was for Sachi. It would make her believe Shinozaki's body was moving as she commanded it, and make her think she was successful. However, making a baby requires two people. So, I was used as the partner in that illusion.

Inside the illusion I had sex with Shinozaki. It was well done. Every detail, every touch, every sight, smell and taste were replicated with perfection. The only thing it couldn't replicate, were the people within it.

That memory was from the memory of that awful night. The night I thought I had betrayed Shinozaki, and done something that could never be forgiven.

"Kishinuma-kun?" The person above me asks again.

I glare at her.

"Who are you?"

This world was strange from the get go. I can't remember if today was the time of the month Sachi would attack again, or even if the illusion was functioning properly. All I have are the vague memories of fearing that Sachi was beginning to catch onto the deception that flicker through my mind.

I can't remember. I can't remember!

Is this world just a dream? A nightmare born from the stress of dealing with Sachi? Am I simply in the illusion again, damaged from repeated uses against the same target?

Or did Sachi figure out how to subvert the illusion? Did she change it so it would make me forget things, change it so I would help her get a new body?

The woman blinks at my question, then smiles.

She lies down on top of me, putting her mouth next to my ear.

"I am Ayumi. Shinozaki Ayumi. Can't you tell from this?"

I feel her against me. The smoothness of her skin, the slight prodding of her nipples, the softness of her stomach.

I want to believe her. I want to believe her with all my heart.

But, fear freezes the blood inside my brain. My heart pounds painfully, and I can feel my arms beginning to tremble.

If Sachi managed to trick me. If this isn't just a dream of Shinozaki, but her comatose body…

I need to stop. I need to stop right now.

Thankfully, I haven't come inside her yet.

That's not enough to prevent pregnancy, but that's the only saving grace I have.

If she gets pregnant… I might not be able to stop Sachi from being born. An abortion is out of the question. Even if Sachi allowed the doctors to destroy her body, I'd still lose Shinozaki. A comatose women can't get pregnant on her own. What I've done would be rape in the eyes of the law. Telling them you were spiritually hoodwinked into getting her knocked up wouldn't stand in court. After that, the Grave of Maltuva or one of the other cults could easily slip into the where she's being held and take her. I might be able to rely on Niwa, but that's not guaranteed to work either. Not to mention, she might try to take custody of Shinozaki from me.

Even if Sachi ends up being born, I need to protect Shinozaki. Sachi's birth won't kill her, but her falling into the hands of the Grave will.

Of course, I can't abort the baby myself. I'm not willing to take that risk with Shinozaki.

Even before that, I'd never be able to look Shinozaki in the eye again. If I did have sex with Shinozki, then I've done something unforgivable. Even if I was tricked, the fact that I let myself slip, the fact that I let Sachi outsmart me is my fault. I was supposed to be looking out for situations like this. Preventing this from happening was the reason I studied and trained with Ayato. If I screwed up, then I've not only betrayed Shinozaki, I've betrayed her parents as well.

"What's wrong?" Shinozaki looks into my eyes. Her expression is confused, troubled, and a little sad. "Don't you believe me?"

I bite my lip.

My heart hurts, every beat threatens to burst it.

Is this really Shinozaki? Is this just a dream? Digging through my memories shows no answers. I don't even know what I was doing before arriving here. Just a jumble of feelings and images with no notion of when or in what order they happened.

I was taking care of Shinozaki. Asuka asked me to look after her… and then?

Blackness. The memories are just gone, as if someone had taken a bucket of tar and painted over them.

What do I need to do in this situation? How do I break free?

The information doesn't exist. Even though I know that there's an illusion that's supposed to protect Shinozaki, even though I know how it worked and its general concept… I can't remember how to control it. I can't remember how to break free.

"Ugh! Kuh!"

I grab my head as pain turns my world red.

It's not there. It's not there. It's not there. Nothing is there.

The skills I had. The things I learned. The abilities I mastered. None of them are there.

Is this what a lobotomized person feels? This despair of knowing for certain you used to know something, but can't remember what it was? The feeling of loss, of all the hours spent learning or practicing something, and then having it removed without reason or warning?

A cold hand touches my forehead, and the pain recedes. Splitting agony tones down to a dull throb, and I squint up at the person above me.

"Calm down, Kishinuma-kun." Shinozaki smiles at me. "It's alright. Just lie down. I'll do the rest."

She caresses my cheek, before sitting up on top of me again. My lower half, oblivious to the agony I felt, or maybe due to some survival instinct, was still hard inside her.

Once again she begins to move, up and down, pleasuring herself with my body.

Would Shinozaki act like that? Was this how she would behave?

That's all my brain has at this point. My memories are a mangled mess, and even if I did have them, I don't have the skills or abilities to break free. All I have is my body, and the memories of Shinozaki before she sealed the Nirvana.

Goddammit… what the fuck have I been training for all this time if I can't even use it?

My eyes are hot, and the Shinozaki bouncing on top of me blurs out. Hot liquid begins to spill out from my eyes, trailing down the side of my head, and wetting the hair above my ears.

Frustration; a mixture of sadness and self-hatred. The feeling consumes my chest, filling me to the brim, and spilling out my throat in chocking sobs.

Dammit… Dammit! DAMMIT!

"Kishinuma-kun!" Cool hands clasp my cheeks. I realize that I'd been yelling. Like a child, I'd started crying and screaming. My weakness had overflowed from my mind to my body.

Goddammit.

Crying like a brat in front of Shinozaki… Now, even if this isn't some illusion and Shinozaki really is here, I've made a mess of things.

"What's wrong?" He eyes scan my face worriedly. Her brow is furrowed slightly. Her mouth is slightly open. I remember this face. Shinozaki would make it from time to time. She made it in Heavenly Host. She made it in Kisaragi. She made it when she first lectured me in that bathroom.

"You… are you really… Shinozaki?"

I don't care about everything else. I don't care that I've lost all the power I've gained or the skills I polished. I don't care that I don't remember what happened before all this, or why this is all happening. That question is all I care about.

"Are you… really… Really…! Shinozaki?" My voice trembles, as does the rest of my body.

To be honest, it's a stupid question, but I have to ask it.

"Stop speaking stupid. Of course I'm Shinozaki Ayumi. Who else could I be?" Shinozaki says with Shinozaki's voice, and the same look of irritation Shinozaki would have.

But… my heart keeps hurting.

That question is stupid; not because the answer is obvious, or because I've already asked it before.

It's stupid because, at this point, there is nothing she can say that can convince me she's telling the truth. Truth is based upon fact, and fact is based upon events. We only know truth because the events that led up to it make sense and are connected to each other. My memories are a mess. I don't know what happened when, or where, or even if it happened at all. Thus, my truth is based on what I've seen, and the few memories unrelated to this situation I have.

In short, the truth of what Shinozaki says is not something she can provide, but something that I have to decide upon. I have to believe if she's telling the truth or not, that is all. That's why, no matter how many times I ask that question, no matter how many times she answers, my heart will know no rest; my doubt will not lessen a single bit. That's why it's stupid. The answer is not something she gives, but I decide.

And if I decide wrongly… both Shinozaki and me would pay for it.

It could be too late already. The seed needed for Sachi's body could be implanting itself in Shinozaki's womb right now; provided by the pre-cum that I'm sure has already entered her.

I look up at Shinozaki's face. She continues staring down at me, worried, sad. Her hands continue to hold my cheeks. The skin is soft. The touch is gentle, but firm.

I close my eyes, and feel more tears spill out.

I don't even know if this is Sachi's trick. For all I know, this could be a Grave spell I got caught by on some job, or an attempt to hack into my mind to find where I live. Niwa can tear out memories and information from someone's head, but that's only because of her affinity and a specific Reigu. The Grave needs to coax the information from its captives.

I grit my teeth at the continued uselessness of my memories. All they do is give me another possibility, and not an answer. The only thing that grows is my confusion and despair. I don't even know how I know that the Grave does that. Did I deal with a similar situation in the past, or did Niwa tell me in one of the long chats we often had while we worked together?

"Oh, stop it!" Shinozaki snaps at me. "What's wrong with you? It was just getting good. Why'd you have to ruin it all?"

I snort. Yeah… That's Shinozaki alright. From the way her voice rises in pitch when she's irritated, to the bluntness of her words. If I was in her position, I'd start to get annoyed too. Everything seems to be going well, then your partner has a mental breakdown and starts sobbing like a baby. On top of that, they ask you if you're the real you over and over again.

"You were having fun until just now." She huffs. "Just lay back and relax."

She lets go of my face, and sits upright again. Even though my head and heart are still confused, my lower half remains undeterred. Great, I don't even know if I can trust my own body anymore.

Shinozaki shifts herself into a more comfortable position. She's still frowning slightly, but the lust from earlier remains on her cheeks. Even after that mess, she still wants to continue.

Up and down, she starts moving again.

All I can do, is grit my teeth, and hold on.

The pleasure begins to return, but I can't enjoy it anymore. All I can do for now is resist it, and buy time.

If this is the Grave's doing, then hopefully Magari or Niwa can get me out. They were still fighting the Grave, if I remember correctly. Me ending up in their hands should be a bad thing for them.

If this is Sachi, then all I can do is hope I can remember something that will let me break free.

And… if this is Shinozaki?

I don't know.

All I can do is compare the Shinozaki before me to the one I swore to protect a long, long time ago.


A/N: And so, we enter into the more twisted part of the story. It's only down hill from here. I wonder if any of my readers remember the scene from the PC-98 version where Yoshiki and Ayumi are trapped in a room together. The situation got really ugly between them. I feel that this piece is kind of like that.

Doubt. Fear. Confusion. Resentment.

All of those boiled and swirled within that room, leading to a rather scary situation. You could even call that mix 'horror'.

It is by adding 'lust' and 'love' into that mix that, I think, you get true erotic horror. Eros is merely an expression of those two, so merely mixing eros with gore will not provide you with erotic horror. That's probably one of the biggest flaws a lot of erotic horror writers have.

Writing Ayumi(?)'s lines was probably the most fun I had, to be honest. She really does look like and sound like Ayumi, even to the point where she doesn't just coddle Yoshiki when he starts crying. She's always been a little harsh with her words, and not just with Yoshiki.

Thinking about it, when I said that that woman there was Ayumi, I might not have been as truthful as I was in my previous A/Ns. I mean, this is Ayumi, but that doesn't mean Ayumi is doing this willingly. After all, the question preceding that was whether Yoshiki had been under mind control. It also doesn't answer from what viewpoint that is Ayumi. It could be that she thinks she is Ayumi, but Yoshiki doesn't think she is Ayumi. In that case, from Yoshiki's perspective, is that Ayumi?

Well, TLDR, whether that's Ayumi or not should have been answered by the readers, and not me.