TOW Chandler Reflects
Author Note: The framework came from David Crane and Marta Kauffman. OK, now it gets cooking! Bit of villainy, bit of sweetness, bit of everything!
It had been a week since Monica turned down Pete, and in Phoebe's apartment, the blonde was pacing. If she was in a ditch, she'd be creating a miniature dust storm. Not that she was the type of person that forced people's lives together - the universe did what it did, for good or for bad - but the current... situation was getting to her. She honestly to all her gods disposed of all matches on her person the moment Monica and Chandler were in the same room in fear of igniting unresolved sexual tension. Whether Chandler returned Monica's feelings, Phoebe hadn't figured out yet - the guy was always rather guarded - but everyone knew he'd always held a soft spot for Monica. And now such things as snooty millionaires were getting involved in the grand plan of the universe. Now it wasn't that Phoebe held any contempt for Pete - like Rachel had said, he was a sweet guy - but he wasn't 'Monica' sweet. There was something about him that Phoebe thought could be a little unsettling in the long run. And if Monica did say yes to him, she'd be bringing nothing good on herself. Rachel would grin of course, but she'd seen the light of how money isn't everything. The guitarist let out a little huff and strode off to Central Perk. She saw Chandler there through the window. She smiled gently, but then that changed when she saw two rather buxom blondes stride through the door, and followed them hot on their tails.
The two others took places by the window. Their auras felt a rather menacing gray. Phoebe bent down at the door, seeing that the 'intruders' as she now called them in her head were talking about Chandler in rather dulcet tones with snide remarks.
"Oh you know how some people give off that spark, Cam." the taller of the two said.
"He could be, Mary, but who knows? We'll see." Cam said, smirking. She walked over to Chandler, putting on a grin. Phoebe felt a surge of protectiveness engulf her.
"Hi, I'm Cam. I know this seems random, but you see, I've got this younger brother-"
"Nope." Chandler replied, his trademark scowl on his face. Phoebe mentally punched the air. "I'm not. I know it seems like I fart lavender and blink rainbows, but I'm not."
"Oh... well, it that case maybe you and a single friend could join me and my lovely friend Mary here for a drink?" Cam pondered, sugar dripping from her vocal cords.
"Well Cam." Chandler smirked. "I've got this good friend who would no doubt love to make love to both of you, but me? I'm not into blonde chicks." he smiled with a care-free air. At this point, Phoebe decided to play a trick on him good-naturedly.
"Chandler, darling!" she beamed, holding the doors as she swept in, nuzzling his hair and peppering his cheek with kisses. "So glad I found you! You can't hide from the Sex Buffet!" she said, with a determined face, pulling him in for a hug.
"Pheebs-" he whispered, but she cut him off as she bit his neck.
"Just play along, I promise." she exhaled, tracing her fingers where she'd bitten him. The look on Cam's and Mary's faces was priceless.
"But you said you didn't like blondes..." Mary trailed off. Chandler and Phoebe stared at them with stoic faces then let out harsh laughs.
"Gotcha! We're just friends." Phoebe said, pointing to herself and Chandler.
"But I can safely say, if I did was into that hair colour, I would never go for arrogant tall buxom bitches like you two. It's clear you were trying to play me for your own ends." Chandler said, a smirk on his face. The two intruders slunk away once Phoebe laid her death stare on them. Chandler properly hugged her this time as they sat down on the now-empty couch. There was a comical light in the masseuse's eyes.
"So... you'd never go for a tall blonde?" she pondered, biting back a chuckle. Chandler realised he might've hit a sore spot and shrugged his shoulders.
"Pheebs you're lovely, but I just don't find you attractive. It'd be... weird." he muttered.
"No harm no fowl, sweetheart. You know I love you anyway." she grinned, messing up his hair. Something just occurred to Chandler.
"Phoebe...?" he asked curiously, treading carefully in case he'd assumed wrong.
"Yes?" she smiled back, wondering what on earth he could be asking her.
"Did you... were you attracted to me at one point? I figured with Thanksgiving..."
"Oh!" Phoebe gasped, flushing pink. "That was just to distract you - I wasn't trying to flaunt it so you'd jump me." And at this point, Chandler let out a righteous belly-laugh.
"Oh mother of god, Phoebe! Such a way to phrase it! I'm sure there's a method to the women I unsuccessfully lust over." he said, but Phoebe could see pain in his eyes.
"Chandler..." she soothed, putting her arm around him in a warm manner. "You'll find someone. She'll be there when you're not expecting her, I promise." she murmured, thinking of their brunette friend and her emotions. "You've had your downfalls-"
"Aurora, Janice..." he rambled. "Both brunettes. Huh." he whispered. Phoebe couldn't help it - she positively beamed an infectious 60-watt grin. "What's the beam for?"
"Chan... if you had to have any girl in the group calming you right now, who would it be? If you don't pick me, I promise I won't be offended." she said, twirling a curl.
"Honestly? I... feel closest to Mon." Chandler replied, a lazy smile donning his face.
"Close like how?" Phoebe asked - the current situation aside, she was curious.
"She fits so perfectly with me. I know she appreciated my hug when you moved out. And I'm sure I've had more than a few moments- maybe 'moments' isn't the right-"
"No, moments could be right. Keep going." Phoebe beamed, loving this.
"Well, with Monica... it's hard to define. You know me and words." he laughed.
"When you hug her, does it feel like she's truly a missing half?" Phoebe asked. Chandler thought of his petite friend. How she balanced him out in so many ways.
"Pheebs..." he stuttered, a light blush coming to his cheeks. Phoebe smiled.
"Yes?" she asked, barely containing her excitement.
"I think I know why I went for brunettes. My subconscious might've been telling me-"
"-you're feeling more than friendly inclinations toward Monica." Phoebe finished.
"Kind of. I mean, she's always been super-pretty." he breathed. Phoebe nodded.
"She's gorgeous, yes." she replied, a chuckle escaping her lips.
"But what about-" Chandler thought about a certain millionaire, but was cut off.
"She's said she's not interested in him, if I recall." the blonde smiled.
"Be that as it may, I'm not going to leap into anything... I mean... it's Monica." Chandler breathed with genuine desperation and confusion. Phoebe hugged him.
"Oh honey, I'm sure the time will come." she said, her head on his chest.
AN: I promise there will be a lot more Chandler/Phoebe brother-sister bonding. I couldn't not have them like that, since I adore platonic!Chanoebe. And I know this seems like a shorter chapter, but I have a few surprises up my sleeve.
