Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this story. It's all fiction, and I make no profit from it.
Author Notes: Anyways, I wrote this with the song Heaven's Not Enough by Yoko Kanno in mind (search on youtube Wolf's Rain OST 2 – Heaven's Not Enough).
For those of you just joining us, what the heck took you so long? W-What is wrong with you? Your reluctance to jump into this fic – unlike many of your peers who are already here having a good time – makes me die a little on the inside. Hehe, just kidding. Now go play in traffic. No I kid, I kid. Anyways, this story solely focuses on their relationship, it's not meant to be some huge multi-chapter thing. If you've read some of my other stories, especially on Fictionpress, you'll know those can get to be about 4,000-8,000 words per chapter. This is meant to be much smaller and compact, but hopefully just as impactful if I do it correctly.
And psssstttt, it's up to you to let me know if I did my job or not. So make sure to review ^^
Clare's living room grew quiet, save for the audibly elevated breathing that came from the only two people in the house; and, if listened to closely enough, the pounding of each other's heartbeat as they ventured into new territory in their relationship.
"Elijah Goldsworthy," Clare began, giggling softly as he held her close to him in a loose embrace on the couch. "Speechless? Why I never thought I'd see the day."
The teen narrowed his eyes petulantly, though at the moment, it only served to give the brooding boy a more sexual appeal. "Eli," he said, drawing out his name slowly.
"Very good, you know your own name." She quipped, giving him a playful smile as her eyes moved from his mouth back up to his gaze. His strong green eyes glinted in challenge. She was determined to outwit him this time – their first time, as an official couple.
His face moved closer to hers as he spoke, "I'm beginning to think that perhaps I've rubbed off on you, Clare." He smirked. "I'm concerned."
She leaned in, pressing her lips softly against his in a brief, chaste kiss, and then quickly pulled back. "Are you sure?" she asked, tilting her head to the side. "I don't feel my IQ dropping any."
"Ouch," he said with a smile; his arms unconsciously tightening their hold around her.
Clare blushed, settling in to his embrace, moving to rest her head on his chest. She breathed deeply, inhaling the unique – yet pleasant – scent of her boyfriend. Her body began to relax in to his, and she let out a content sigh. "I think I won."
Eli could practically hear the smile in her voice. Her victory imbued in the tone of her voice. He tilted his head, looking down at her. "Won what?"
"Just tell me I won," she shifted, turning to read his reaction.
Eli looked off to the side for a moment, and then focused on Clare, whose light-blue eyes were sparkling in amusement. "I'll tell you anything if it'll get you to kiss me again." He smirked, waggling his eyebrows for added emphasis.
She leaned back and swatted his chest with her hand, her face scrunched up in a mock-hurt expression. "Cheater, admit it! Admit that I outwitted you."
She's so pretty when she gets riled up, Eli thought, fighting back another smirk that threatened to appear on his countenance. He placed an obsequious smile on his face. "Yes, Clare, you win, alright?" He conceded and leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers. His breath washed over her gently; the mood in the room noticeably shifting as they quieted down, staring into each other's eyes.
Clare followed his lead, although it was Eli who initiated the kiss this time. She responded immediately, pressing back, and shuddered as she gave way, allowing his tongue to slide in and rub against hers. His right hand began working its way to the back of her head, pulling her hair down gently, her head leaning back further while he intensified the kiss.
They parted minutes later, both teens gulping for air as their bodies pulsed with a chaotic energy that served to fuel their ever growing desire to go beyond mere biting, and kissing, and nibbling. Hazy blue eyes locked with green, both reflecting at each other a strong, fervent gaze as Clare unknowingly ran her tongue across her bruised, red lips.
Eli's let out a repressed groan as Clare shifted her weight around, sending tendrils of pleasure coursing through him. He flipped his head to the side as some of his hair fell to obscure his view, and smiled, leaning in to give Clare one last kiss before he moved her gently off his lap.
"I need to get going soon," he said, grabbing his keys from the table in front of the couch as he stood up.
"You.. uh, what?" She stuttered, following him to her door. Did I do something wrong? Was the first thought that ran instantaneously through her head. One minute we're all… ahem, hot and heavy, and the next he… he leaves? "Eli, I-"
He cut her off, placing a soft, quick kiss on her lips. "I'll talk to you later." He said, opening the door and making his way out to his car.
Clare stood by the door frame, studying him as he walked away from her house, her hands idly playing with the hem of her shirt. Maybe he had some extra homework he had forgotten about? She shook her head, knowing that that was not the case. What the heck just-
happened? Eli thought; his lips still atingle from Clare's sweet, soft lips. He started up his car and drove off, offering a polite wave to Clare as he left. Unfortunately for him, he couldn't escape the thoughts swarming around in his mind. This is going to be a long night, he thought to himself as he eyed his appearance in the rear view mirror. His cheeks were still flushed and his hair was a mess. Get ahold of yourself, Eli! You can't… you can't let this happen again.
"And then he just left?" Alli questioned. Clare nodded, following her and Drew into the computer lab.
"What do you think it means, though? We were having a good time; we went on a picnic beforehand. Everything was going good, and then all of a sudden he pulls away, saying he had to go!"
Drew sat to the right of Alli, with Clare to the left, and shook his head. "I don't know, that sounds sort of off. Maybe he got out of a relationship before he came here? Ophf," He grunted as Alli's elbow dug into the side of his ribs.
"No, I, I just don't see that happening. The thing about Eli is, when I look into his eyes, it's like he doesn't have any secrets."
"Everybody has secrets, Clare." Alli responded.
She sighed, looking for a better way to articulate what she meant. "No, I know, but I feel like I can trust him with anything, and that the feeling is mutual. I know, I know that's a huge step, but, when I'm with him…" she trailed off.
"You know," Drew started, "word on the street is that he seems like someone who's out to start trouble." He shook his head. "Not that I believe that, though. I've met him, and Adam swears by him, but you know that behind every lie, there's some truth."
"And… done!" Alli said, her voice breaking the brief interlude of silence. She flashed a winning smile in Drew's direction as she clicked send on the computer. "Party at Drew's house this weekend."
He smiled and leaned over, giving her a quick peck on the lips. "You bet," he looked over at Clare, "you're coming? You could bring your, uh, boyfriend."
"That's a great idea!" The black-haired girl said, her voice rising with excitement.
Clare laughed as Alli looked over at her; her brown eyes swimming with hope. "You just want to see us as a couple," she giggled, briefly sticking her tongue out.
"I think you two are cute together. And you could use it to find out what's been going on in his head. See why he bailed yesterday."
Clare nodded, which her friend took as an instant sign of acceptance. Squealing, she wrapped her arms around Clare's neck in a tight hug. Call her crazy, but the more Clare thought about it, the more it sounded somewhat feasible. While she wasn't certain that he'd agree to go to a party, what was the harm in asking? What with what's been going on lately at home.. and Alli being all happy and cozy with Drew, she sighed. She didn't want to sound bitter, and she wasn't, really. Although she was still leery of their relationship, she hoped her friend had finally found what she was looking for. It'd be nice to show off Eli to the others. Let them know I've moved on, and that I'm happy. Her lips turned in an uplifting smile. And that he's incredibly hot.
When lunch came around, Clare decided to head out to the parking lot; destination: Morty. She heard from Eli in English that it barely made it to school today, and figured that he'd be out working on it. She was right.
"Having any luck there?" She asked as she approached Eli. He stood with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, a few trickles of sweat slowly sliding down his face and down his neck.
"Oh, Clare," he smiled, wiping his forehead with his forearm. "Perfect timing, I'm just finishing up."
"So it works all right? If not, I can get my mom to give you a ride home with us." She offered, unknowingly biting her lip as a bubble of shyness crept up inside of her.
He smiled. "I appreciate the offer, but I believe Morty will be up and running and ready for the road!" His eyes looked affectionately down at his ride, in the same way he would look at her, Clare noted.
"That's good," she began, then paused. "Uh, listen, Eli, I was wondering if you wanted to go to a party on Friday?"
Eli raised his eyebrows. Clare, wanting to go to a party? he thought. "Who's hosting?"
"Drew is. His parents are visiting his grandma with Adam for the weekend." And before Eli could ask, Clare responded, "Yes, as Adam."
Eli nodded, happy for his friend. "Again, I appreciate the offer, but no thanks."
Clare looked at him, puzzled, and before she could bite her tongue, she retorted, "You could at least try and think about it before you shoot it down."
"Okay," Eli paused. He began tapping his foot on the asphalt. He glanced around, looking up towards the sky, and then to his wrist, pretending to stare at a watch that wasn't there. Finally, he looked up at her, a half-smile etched on his. "No thanks."
"You know what, that's just great," she shook her head, taking a few steps backwards, away from her… ugh, right now she couldn't even think of the word boyfriend. "That attitude, that pushes away more people than you think. I hope you realize that before you're alone for good."
His eyes softened while he watched Clare stalk off. He slowly released a breath he wasn't even aware he was holding, and turned back to his car, his eyes obscured by the dark-brown locks that fell across his face. It's easier that way, Clare; makes it so that nobody gets hurt.
Thursday night found Clare all alone at home. Her parents, surprising her, told her they had dinner plans and were going to be out late that night. She smiled, thinking back on the event that happened a mere half hour ago. At least one thing was starting to look like it was going right in her life.
Her thoughts began drifting towards Eli, as they had been for weeks, since they first met each other. However, after what occurred from Sunday night into Monday, she wasn't sure what was going on anymore. Eli, she thought, mulling over his name, again and again. Why did he have to make things so difficult? "Maybe I shouldn't have asked him to go to that party, I mean, he doesn't strike me as the type that'd… maybe if it would have been more of a small gathering instead…" She groaned, unable to keep her thoughts straight. She shook her head lightly, trying to clear it of the situation, but to no avail. It played as if it were a constant loop, running through her head, over and over, playing the scene from the parking lot on Monday.
I knew he'd say no, said another voice in her head. And we overreacted! Talk about pushing someone away, that's exactly what we did. She sighed, putting her pencil down on her homework that lay in front of her. Rubbing her temples, the voice continued, It's not as if he's just going to come knocking on the do-
Thwack thwack thwack
Clare looked up at the ceiling, silently mouthing, "Are you serious?"
Another round of knocks at the door got her to finally move from her spot at the dining room table and head towards the door. She stopped once at the mirror that hung by the door, checking her reflection. Satisfied with her appearance, she nodded and looked through the shades of the door.
"Eli," she whispered, taken aback. Was this some sort of divine intervention? She shook herself out of her stupor and opened the door.
He stood there calmly, a half-smile worn on his face. He wore a black vest with a white shirt underneath, and the same black jeans with an all-white belt from earlier in the school day. Oddly, although he seemed somewhat aloof, Clare couldn't help but feel some apprehension radiating from him.
"May I come in?" He inquired.
"What do you want, Eli?"
"To talk, Clare." He paused, looking down briefly before meeting her gaze. "Please? We need to talk."
She couldn't help but roll her eyes. She tried not to sound bitter as she said, "It's been four days, Eli."
He stood there, his mouth gaping. Did I really hurt you that much, Clare? I'm sorry. He shook himself from the haze of his thoughts. "Just, give me five minutes. If you don't like what I have to say, I'll..." he stopped as his voice hitched. "I'll leave, okay?"
Clare nodded her head, the two making their way into the living room, except this time found Eli on the chair a few feet away from the couch.
"Thanks for letting me in," Eli said as they both sat down. Clare nodded once, but said nothing. "I know you're upset, and I know it's not because of the party." He looked at her, but she remained rather stoic. Taking the continued silence as an invitation to continue, he did so. "I was incredibly rude and out of line for the way I acted towards you, and for that I'm sorry."
This time, Clare shifted; a brief flash of hurt ran across her blue eyes before being masked by her soft reddish-brown locks.
"I like you, Clare," he said. "A lot. More than you know. It's just that…" he hesitated, licking his lips. When he spoke next, his voice was barely audible, so much so that Clare had to lean forwards to hear him. "I'm afraid that if I get too close to you, I'm going to lose you." He spoke softly; his voice filled with sorrow.
"Eli…" Clare whispered.
"I-I don't want that to happen again," he said, fighting back tears as he tried to continue on with his story. "There's still a lot that," he coughed, "that you don't know about me, yet." He looked up at her, "But I want you to." He waited for her to nod, and then took a deep breath and focused on no spot in particular on the living room floor. "My girlfriend, she died w-when… when I..." he swallowed, fighting the lump in his throat. "Ahem, s-sorry," he paused again, struggling to regain his composure.
Clare could feel tears of her own begin to form, watching as Eli struggled a few feet away. It killed her to see him go through such pain, and finally, when he looked up at her, she gasped; his green eyes were sparkling with tears that were ready to burst forth. The hurt, lost look that just consumed him was too much for her heart. She got up and walked over, sitting down next to him. "It's okay, it's okay," she murmured in his ear.
He turned to her and let the sobs overtake him. He cried into her shoulder as a multitude of emotions ran through him: embarrassment, pain, loneliness, and fear. They all kept pouring through him as Clare's hand rubbed soothing circles on his back while her sweet voice whispered soothing words in an attempt to assuage the teen's raging emotions.
"I don't want to lose you," he spoke, his breath washing gently over the shell of her ear as they held each other close. "I… I feel like I've found… someone that means so much to me, I-I just,-"
"Shhh," she murmured, feeling a few tears of her own spill out as she turned to place a soft kiss on the top of his head. "You won't, Eli." She hugged him, the warmth of her body working to relax his tense muscles. "I'm not going anywhere."
Author's Notes: Chapter three is in the books! Yeah yeah! Anyways, before I go any further (and this will be brief), please, if you like what I read, check out some of my other stuff ^^ and review!
Okay now what else, oh yes! There'll probably be one last chapter after this current one (so 4 chapters in total), and then I might do a longer multi-fic Degrassi thingy. Mayyyyyyybe. I'm not gonna say for sure, although it's looking like it may happen.
Also, I hope you liked the song choice. Heaven's not enough, if when I'm there I don't remember you. How does that NOT tug on your heart strings?
Peace for now
