drinkin' dirty water kills a man
the story of that stupidly carved revolver (according to a snake)

ocelot and raikov


They scoured the armoury with such an intense scrutiny only reserved for intimidating secrets into the open.

"What about this one?" Ocelot asked, chancing upon a plain but capable revolver. He held it up, and Raikov made a clearly disgusted face.

"No, it's ugly; put it down."

Scowling, Ocelot didn't know why the other Major cared; he wasn't the one who was schooled by a dirty American. But he deferred to the other's judgment on the matter of aesthetics and came calling when Raikov announced that he had found the perfect revolver for him to wield:

It had a design engraved into it that reminded him of a pattern that would have been embroidered on his grandmother's clothes, had he had one.

Picking it up and twirling it experimentally, Ocelot noted how the light reflected off its shiny surface as it made its revolutions. For reasons he couldn't quite verbalize, that was very important to him, and this gun was deemed somewhat satisfactory.

"It makes me look like a poof, though," he observed with a scowl.

Raikov stared at him until he finally accepted the gun into his holster.