Here we go, another chapter! I tried making this one longer, since I thought the previous chapter was short. I hope you're enjoying this so far, those who are reading. Do drop a review! I practically live on feedback. It's almost as good as coffee.
Disclaimer: I would love to work at Pixar, but that does not and never will mean I own anyone here.
Two Firsts and a Second
"I call upon the voice of the Equinox Philosopher!"
From behind the curtains, Flik watched as Manny spun the Cabinet of Metamorphosis. Normally, he would be completely focused on the show, but his mind kept wandering this time. It was almost time for the clowns to act, and each passing second made him more jittery, yet they also seemed agonizingly slow. Part of him wanted to get this thing over with, another part wanted to take some more time to perfect his performance. He glanced at the bird costume at the side, just waiting for its chance to shine, and then looked around the backstage for some distraction.
It didn't really help. The backroom was just as bustling as the outside floor itself. Even when resting, nobody simply laid around and relaxed. To one side, Rosie was praising Dim and giving him treats, and then checking him over in case she accidentally struck him, Judging by the rhino's pleased expression, he was totally fine. Nearer to the curtains, Tuck and Roll were arguing in their unintelligible language and wrestling. As it was an everyday occurrence, they were left uninterrupted. Way in the back, Heimlich was chasing Francis and Slim as last minute practice for their upcoming act. Well, it was either that or Francis had stolen the large clown's pie and everyone knew Heimlich magically became active when he was hungry.
Giving up, Flik looked back outside, where he caught sight of the highwire poles. Thoughts congregated in his head and his heart began to race with excitement. Wouldn't it be amazing if the bird flew down from above?!
"Uh oh, that's the face of someone who's got an idea."
Perfect! Just the person he wanted to ask! "Rosie! I have—"
"No can do. You don't want to overdo it." The ribbon dancer pulled him away from the curtains. "I don't care how much better you think it'll be. If we haven't rehearsed, we can't do it."
"Just think of it as improvisation!" Flik pleaded, putting his hands together. "You just need to lower me—the bird—to the ground for a split second. I don't need to fly!"
"You don't need to try so hard, either. It's just one act, and I'm sure you'll be fine." She gestured to the resting bird. "Besides, do you even have a harness in that thing? I don't think you expect me to just lower you without one." Remembering the frame under the tarp, Flik knew she was right. It wouldn't be easy to float down as is, and untying the silk could be a hassle.
With a defeated sigh, he lost his energetic posture. "Okay, you're right. I just wanted to prove myself, you know? I mean, I don't work everyday like the rest of you do. Only when something needs fixing." It certainly didn't feel like enough to warrant the roof over his head and the food he shared with everyone. "You all took me in when I didn't have anything. Shouldn't I be giving back?"
Rosie huffed and rolled her eyes. "We didn't adopt you on a loan or anything like that. It's all unconditional, got it? Unconditional." She gave him a light punch to the arm as she enunciated. "Just take care of yourself, that's all we want. And I mean it."
Before Flik could retort, he heard a loud applause. He felt his heart pounding as he realized it was time for clowns to go out.
"Magic show is over! You clowns get out there now!" P.T. shouted from the curtain before leaping back out to announce the act.
"Oh, I hate performing on an empty shtomach," Heimlich whined. Dressed as a bee, he followed sulkily after the flowered Slim and Francis, pausing to smile and wave at Flik. "Vish us luck!"
"Break a leg!" the blue clown waved back, hurrying to get to his bird. The costume's wings flapped with as much enthusiasm as he had. "Should I make bird sounds? Or will the music drown me out? What if the music isn't loud enough and I make no sounds and—"
"Flik, honey, nothing's going to happen," Rosie assured him, bringing him to the curtain. "Now, just watch for your cue. And be natural, okay?"
Outside, Slim pranced around, with a seemingly cheerful Francis dancing circles around him. "Tra la la la la, spring's in the air, and I'm a flower… with nothing interesting to say." His nonchalant and bored tone got some of the audience chuckling. Suddenly, they both jumped back as Heimlich flopped where they stood. "A bee!"
"I am a cute little bumblebee! Here I come! Flitting srough zee meadow!" The bee gave chase after the flowers, though they were too quick for him. Huffing and puffing, the large clown began to lose momentum. "Shlow down, you flowers!"
"Here I go!" Flik burst through the curtain, doing his best bird shriek, and charged towards Heimlich. He laughed as the large clown screamed and with renewed energy ran for his life. Well, it was more like he hobbled and flailed like a fish. Flik then began hopping, zig-zagging his movements and circling the wriggling bee.
The crowd roared, some screaming for Heimlich to get away and some cheering for the bird to get him. Taps bounced off the tarp as popcorn launched from the front seats, maybe an attempt to save the bee from the horrifying bird. Formerly edible treats crunched under Flik's feet and he began to make a game of trying to hop on as many as he could whilst chasing Heimlich. Best of all, laughter chorused all around. There was honest-to-goodness laughter and Flik was making it happen! He began to join them, tilting the bird back as it celebrated with him, head high and beak open.
Then he brought it down on Heimlich's head.
Flik had to move back a bit, but there was no escaping his friend's frantic screaming. Trying to bear with ringing ears, he pushed at the handles to open the beak enough for Heimlich to jump through, but then he felt the joints catch. To his horror, the beak wouldn't open any further. "No, no, no!"
"Vat's vrong?!"
"It's stuck!" Flik jiggled the handles, trying to get them to come loose, but they wouldn't budge. Frustration bubbled up as he tried again and again to get the beak to open up. He had been working on this for weeks and it just had to mess up now! "C'mon! Open!"
He heard the music boom, playing up the drama, trying to compete with the crowd drowning everything but their own exhilaration. Seeing shadows fall over the tarp, Flik knew that Slim and Francis were ready to intervene if anything was amiss. Their waving shadows meant they were worried, but he couldn't hear a thing they were saying. Meanwhile, Flik just panicked as the frame crackled. The bird was supposed to eat the bee, not choke on it!
"Wait, that's it! The bird's choking on the bee!" He jerked to the side and lurched the bird forward, eliciting a collective gasp. "Pull me out as soon as I fall!"
Here's to hoping Heimlich heard what he said. The audience's hilarity made it hard to hear his own voice. Flik rattled the bird, giving it enough spasms so as to give it the death throes. Finally, he fell to his knees, taking his creation with him as the music died abruptly. As the bird collapsed, Heimlich grabbed him and pulled him out through the beak, holding him high above the carcass. There was a drum roll as he began to "wake," and a trumpet played the classic "Ta-da!" music.
The viewers came to life once again with applause, a sign of a show well done. For the finishing touch, Heimlich set Flik down and the two of them hunched like villains. Their fingers bent and hands became reaching claws. They smirked at Slim and Francis, who wore faces of fear as the flowers were now faced against two insects. They ran toward the curtain, chased by the bee and his new friend. The audience's joy and laughter saw them off.
Flik was the last to leave the stage. "Whoo! Did you see that? Wasn't that amazing?!" he cheered once he was back behind the curtain. "I feel so alive!"
"Good! Because you're gonna be dead!" Waving a threatening fist, Francis marched up to Flik. "We didn't rehearse any dying bird! You scared Slim to death!"
Said tall man raised a knowing eyebrow. "What Francis means is that we were worried," he corrected with a smirk. He then gave Flik a stern look and crossed his arms. "It was funny in the end, but we were shocked when you hit the floor."
Flik raised his hands in surrender. "I know, I know. I'm sorry," though there was hardly a sign of remorse on the his face. "The beak got stuck, so I had to think fast to save the act. Heimlich can vouch for me! Right, Heimlich?"
"Ja, zee beak vas shtuck," nodded the large clown.
"See?"
The duo sighed, not quite convinced but not unbelieving either. "Just don't do it again," said the shorter of the two, still glaring.
The blue clown took no heed and simply stood proudly. "Still, not bad for a first show, huh?"
"And it's not over yet!" P.T. peeked in before anyone could respond. "Everyone! Finale, now!" Then he hopped out to announce the final act for the night. A few second later, everyone heard the familiar shout of "FLAMING DEATH!"
"Seriously?!" Francis grouched. "We just got back!"
"Already? We normally have a few more seconds."
"It's not so bad," Slim chimed, though he spoke more to a confused Flik than the irritated Francis. "We clowns only need to stand by. Be sure to get the water ready."
"Got it!"
The troupe made it back out in a single file line, taking their places once introduced by the ringmaster. Heimlich and Francis doused a giant adhesive sheet with oil as Slim directed attention to the sheet; Tuck and Roll swung from the trapeze and landed in front of a cannon; Dim took his place on a diving board over that cannon; Manny and Gypsy set a timer to fifteen seconds; and finally Rosie waved to the audience from the highwire. Only Flik stayed out of the spotlight, filling up buckets with water and lining them up. When everything was done, all acts besides the clowns blindfolded themselves as per instructions.
Now, all that was left was to watch. Flik flipped over an empty bucket and took a seat, waiting for P.T. to light the trail of gunpowder. Chances of everything going as planned were almost nil. Sometimes Tuck and Roll would argue and someone else—usually Flea—would get caught in the sheet instead. The true suspense then lied in whether or not something would go wrong, and watching the spectator's reactions was just as entertaining as seeing the finale blind.
So when Tuck and Roll once again accidentally got the gunpowder lit too early, Flik watched the audience. He began to wonder then how Dot was reacting to all of this. The idea that his new friend was as shocked as everyone else did seem funny. He spotted her covering her face, yet peeking out between her fingers. The regal woman next to her, most certainly the Queen, was on the edge of her seat as well.
Time slowed when his eyes fell on the young woman sitting at the Queen's right hand.
The tiara on her head was a clear sign she was a princess, but all that really registered in Flik's mind was that she was beautiful. She held herself with a kind of gracefulness that seemed almost celestial. Her lavender hair was a flowing river about her heart-shaped face, and somehow a halo in the dimness of the tent. Maybe most striking was the somber and almost melancholic air about her. Flik felt a longing to talk to the Princess, to bring out a smile on her face, to hear her laugh.
The world fell away completely once her eyes met his, and he saw hints of… grief? Relief? His breath hitched as he felt the spaces within him getting smaller and smaller, something foreign overflowing and somehow blocking his throat. He clenched his hand over his heart in a vain attempt to keep it from bursting. The invading feeling was both comforting and painful, more overwhelming than any therapy he had gone through. Most of all, this strange feeling was many parts hope.
Maybe... just maybe…
She was the one who broke contact, and reality crashed back onto Flik. The world was so loud with screams and panicked shouts for "Water! Water! Water!" At the stage, he saw his friends scrambling about with the buckets of water, but they would end up throwing it over the flames instead of on them. Those same flames were crawling toward a trapped P.T. Flea.
Wait a second, Flik was supposed to be out there, too!
He sprung to his feet and grabbed one of the remaining buckets of water, rushing to the gunpowder to throw water over it, but he was too late. Blinding light seared away even the sound, heating the entire room. The water evaporated immediately in the inferno, and part of him wondered if his boss could really survive it. As the fire cleared, the crowd gasped and murmured as there was no sign of the ringmaster. Just about everyone else was frozen, too. The stage was the setting of a tragedy.
But then the music rose triumphant and the lights shined on P.T. being lowered to the ground by Rosie's silk. There arose cheering, applause, sighs of relief that went unheard in the euphoria, and a subtle sign to exit.
This time, Flik was the first to leave. Refreshing cold air hit him and he tried to breathe as much of it in as he could. Finding a place mostly cleared of people and out of the way of exiting citizens, he leaned against a nearby pole to get his bearings. The familiar emptiness was much more prominent now that there was nothing to distract him, and it made him miss the weird feeling more and more. Soon, he found it hard to stand, and he slid to the ground.
How strange. He thought he would be celebrating with his friends, listening to any comments and advice, reading written anonymous reviews from the audience. Everything went well for once, so there was really no need for him to try to hide from everyone. Maybe it was a secret fear that Manny would have to fix up his soul again. Part of Flik worried that P.T. might get a little miffed, but if he could handle Tuck and Roll not understanding a thing he said, he could probably tolerate this.
"I'm fine, I'm fine. It'll pass," he repeated to himself over and over again. It never physically helped, but it gave him something to concentrate on. This emptiness was nothing new, but he'd be lying if he tried to convince himself that it wasn't one of the worst bouts he felt in a while.
Images of the Princess flashed back to his mind. No, she did not look familiar at all. Nothing came to mind, no bells rung, no sights nor sounds nor any other sense. True to the curse, there were no memories of her. In spite of it all, she somehow made his soul react. It was impossible, but it was such a wonderful miracle. Just who was she that she could make him feel so complete?
"Is this what falling in love feels like?" Flik mused, an undoubtedly stupid grin growing on his face. How else could he explain this turn of events? It must be love at first sight. If people could call love the most powerful force, then even a fractured soul like his could fall into its sweet influence. It was so silly, he hadn't even spoken a word, but something was there. He saw something in her eyes, too.
But reality was the destroyer of dreams, and the grin disappeared. His crush was a princess, and he was a clown. Moreover, he was a cursed nobody, a nonperson of questionable existence. What were the odds that there was a chance for him?
"Flik! Hey!" The clown's train of thought caught in a wreck of the century as a child's voice called to him. Lilac bounced from the corner of his eye and he turned to see Princess Dot running up to him. "You were great! Was that really your first show?"
Flik gave her an appreciative smile, both for her little review and for the distraction. "Yep. There'll be more where that came from, too."
"I didn't see you use the catapult, though."
"That's because it's not done yet." Seeing that they were rather alone, Flik became worried. "Hey, where's your mother, Princess? Did you really run over here by yourself?"
The little princess crossed her arms and pouted. Her freckles just made her look even more like an adorable little girl. "I said you can call me 'Dot,'" she huffed. "I'm okay, anyway. I'm not little; I can take care of myself."
"You make being little sound like a bad thing."
"Because it is!"
"No, it's not."
"Is too!"
"Is not."
"Is too!"
"Is not!"
"Is too, is too, is too!"
"Is not, is not, is—" Flik's eyes widened as he realized he was a grown man bickering with a child. Not to mention he himself didn't appreciate being called a five-year-old anyway. What a hypocrite. "You know what? We'll get back to that."
"That just means I win," the little princess bragged smugly. "So, why are you on the ground? Are you tired?"
"Just a bit." Flik adjusted himself so that he didn't look so much like a slouch. "Anyway, why aren't you with your mother? It's not safe to be here, and I'm a stranger."
She didn't seem fazed at all. "But you're nice. I should know. I'm a good judge of charcter."
"You mean 'character?'"
"Yeah, that."
Flik sighed, trying not to give her a talk about stranger danger. Right now, she was not with her family and he was the only one who could help her get back to them. "C'mon, let's get you back to your mom, and then promise you won't go following every 'nice' guy." He stood up, glad that he managed to stay stable, and began walking with Dot back to the more populous areas. His mind began to bring up images of the sad-eyed Princess. "Say, Dot, who was that woman next to your mother?" He flinched, for the words had rushed out the moment he thought of her.
"She's my sister: Princess Atta," replied the younger princess. Her tone was unreadable. "Do you like her?"
"What?! No way. I just saw her and I—"
"You like her, huh?" Dot paused, which meant Flik had to stop, too. "It's okay. A lot of people do." Her smile fell a little. "But she can't like anybody."
"Huh? Why not?" O reality why must you be so cruel?
"I don't know. Nobody will tell me." She looked sadly up at Flik. "I want her to be happy, though. Can you make her happy?"
The clown knelt down to her level. "I'll come up with something," he told her, but he was so unsure. What would be good enough for a princess? "What kind of things does she like?"
Dot put a hand to her chin. Already acting like a little thinker. "I can check her room and tell you tomorrow."
"I don't think she'd appreciate that."
"Dot!" someone called, causing both man and child to turn toward the voice. "Dot! Where are you?!"
"It's Mom!" As if their conversation hadn't happened, the little princess brightened up. Her small legs carried her toward the regal Queen and her squad of guards, and Dot briefly looked back to wave farewell. "Bye, Flik! See you tomorrow!"
Flik waved back and kept up a smile until she was out of sight. Only afterwards did he let his body become somewhat limp. He took the time to process what he had just learned. Apparently, his crush is named "Atta" and she was could not "like" anyone. Whether that meant she was not allowed to or simply could not feel attraction, Flik wasn't sure, but the hopelessness he felt just grew deeper.
Tired, he returned to the tent. He'll just let everyone know he's okay, if they were worried, and then go home to work on his catapult.
It was late at night, everyone should be asleep, and the guards never looked into this room.
"Okay, I'm ready," Atta murmured to herself and she looked her reflection up and down. She was dressed in a dark blue robe, a hood covering her head. With the moon out and shining, wearing something black would be too noticeable, too alarming, should anyone happen to look up. No, she was not leaving permanently, but she did need fresh air and space. Lots and lots of space, without any guards.
The princess moved the loose stones behind her dresser, revealing a tunnel to the outside world. She cradled her box to her figure before crawling through the tunnel and closing the opening behind her, and then she opened up the other side. The air was crisp and cool, nothing like the stuffy room. Oh, she had measures let in some air, but it was nothing compared to the infinite supply that was outside.
The outside opening led out below the balcony, or what used to be a balcony. It had been converted into an extension of her tower's room, and now held her bed among other things. This was so anyone who could fly would not be able to enter her room easily, but also so she wouldn't have a platform to fly off of herself. No one really counted on her developing a rebellious streak and making an opening, however.
Carefully, she peeked out to ensure no one was watching nor patrolling. She waited for a few minutes, ducking back as she heard a guard pass by. Quickly, she set her box down and hung off the hole she had made, taking a deep breath and imagining wings on her back. A buzzing later, she felt weight lose its grip on her and she floated effortlessly. Behind her were light blurs like hummingbird wings. She retrieved her box, closed up the exit, and flew off into the night.
Nowhere in the Anterrian capital was safe for her to land. It was not because anywhere was particularly dangerous, but because they would surely report her. After all, she was not supposed to be outside unsupervised. It was dangerous for them. Atta felt a bitterness that caused her to clutch her parcel closer to her. She never thought she would ever resent those sentiments.
It was unbecoming of their Chosen Princess, after all.
But she absolutely could not stay in her room tonight. In all other nights over these few years that she flew away, she could chalk them up to mere whims, but not so for tonight. Her heart was in turmoil. If she remained in her prison, she knew she would have gone mad.
Atta glanced behind her to ensure the castle was still in view before looking down. She spotted a clearing complete with a lake, separated from town and the fairgrounds by a decent stretch of trees. It wasn't too far either, so she reasoned she could rush back home fairly quickly if she needed to.
Her feet soon touched ground, right at the shore of the lake. It was beautiful here. The waters were painted with the stars and the moon above, but the ripples were a telltale sign that it was all simply a reflection. Fireflies danced together, seeming to rise from the lake and filling the space between land and sky with golden orbs.
Atta settled herself down on a boulder embedded in the grass some distance away. Her box was set right next to her and opened, revealing white lilies within. The princess pulled out the base that the flowers rested on: a box no longer than two hands, no wider than a palm, and no taller than any common jewelry box. Embracing its sides were carefully carved green leaves and, despite the dim light, she could see that the remaining spaces were painted both lavender and sky blue. At its front was a daisy that served as both latch and knob.
She smiled at the little thing, though strained at seeing how one of the lilies was clearly clumsily glued on, over and over again. Sighing, she placed her treasure on her lap, turned the daisy, and listened intently to the musical chimes that followed. The unrest in her heart began to settle with each note that the music box played. Even the world seemed to have the courtesy to remain quiet and allow her this moment. All she could hear now was the music so carefully and lovingly made just for her.
Then pain followed.
Atta let out an ungraceful cry and leaned forward, her hands flying to the back of her head. Her heart stopped and blood ran cold once she heard the music stop and something thud on the ground. Eyes widened in horror as she took in the sight of the music box tumbling down, lid snapped off its hinge and leaving behind flowers.
"Oh no! No!" She gave chase, gathering up the pieces and grabbing the box before it touched the wet sand. The stinging behind her head felt like nothing now as she struggled to control the absolute grief in her heart.
"I'm sorry!" someone shrieked behind her and she jolted, horrified to find that she wasn't alone. Spinning around, Atta spotted a male shape running towards her, panic all over his face as "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please forgive me!" tumbled out of his mouth without breath.
Alarmed, she stumbled back and tripped, the music box in its entirety flying into the waters. Now it was her turn to shriek. She scrambled into the water to try to retrieve everything before the waves could wash them away forever. A growl left her as she turned and glared at the intruder. "Don't just stand there! Help me!"
Water splashed all over her as a separate set of legs and arms joined in the search. "I'm really, truly sorry!" he kept rambling. "I didn't know anybody would be here at this time."
"Look, we'll talk about this later. Just find a box, a lid, and some flowers."
Together, much to her relief, they did managed to retrieve everything. Atta practically snatched whatever pieces the stranger had and put everything aside to dry. The box, however, was simply ruined.
"That… that was the last thing he ever gave to me," she murmured, grief slowly heating to rage, "and it's broken." She faced him, intending to give the culprit a piece of her mind, maybe even say things she would regret later, but—
—her heart stopped.
They weren't supposed to meet. Not now, not ever again. She could not go through that heartbreak again!
The clown's blue eyes were wide with shock of his own. "Pr-Princess Atta!" he stammered, and she realized her hood had fallen.
The princess turned to run, pulling her hood back over her head, but a desperate hand grabbed her wrist and she panicked. "Let go!" She slapped him with her free hand, an action she regretted just as soon, but she could not afford to slow down. This was to save his life!
"Please…"
Atta's breath hitched. Her legs refused to move any further. Slowly, she turned back towards him, and found him on the ground. His hand looked like it was trying to rip his own heart out of his chest. His face was so contorted with agony that doing so might actually help him. Even so, he managed to look up at her, as if she could save him.
"Please… do you know me?"
