The first few days went fine, and Elros and Elrond were almost completely obedient. They learned quickly that if they behaved they would be allowed a few minutes, well supervised, free of their bonds to play before bed. After two days however, they began to protest riding and instead asked to walk. When refused they fell silent and allowed themselves to be placed in the saddle.
Two more days however, and the mere mention of the horses was enough to cause tears. Maglor hushed them and asked why they did not like riding, but they wouldn't tell him, so they continued being placed in the saddle every morning. The only thing they seemed to like about the riding was being untied, but after a few days even Maglor taking their ropes off was met with deadened eyes. No amount of singing did any good either, neither boy seemed to care, and even Elrond would not sing with him.
"Stop," Maedhros said finally. "All you are doing is making your throat sore."
Maglor obeyed and stroked the head of the child sitting in front of him. Today it was Elros.
Maedhros glanced sideways at his brother. "What are we going to do?" he asked in Quenya.
Maglor thought for a moment. "I do not know, it seemed a good idea to bring them, but now I am not so certain."
"They're sweet," Maglor volunteered.
Maedhros ignored the comment and refused to agree (or disagree which to Maglor was very telling).
"Do you think we can trade them for the Silmaril?" Maglor asked. We cannot of course, it is gone now, beyond our reach most likely. Valar, what have I done?
"I hope, and if I thought they would listen I would pray."
Maglor offered a supportive smile. "I do not believe we are completely forsaken just yet brother." More than he believed his words he just placed his hope in them.
Maedhros said nothing, and Maglor knew that he considered his capture to be a sign that the Valar had turned his back on him. Elrond, who was seated in front of Maedhros, held his arm out to Elros and gave a quiet cry. Elros answered him weakly.
"They are fading," Maedhros still spoke in Quenya so the children would not understand. Maglor pretended not to notice that he had begun to rub Elrond's stomach (his hand rested there to hold the reins and prevent the boy from falling).
"Yes, I fear they may be." Maglor agreed, looking down Elros whose head lolled to the side in a stupor.
"We cannot allow that, no one would trade a Silmaril for a dead body."
Admit you care for them. Why do you hide behind this façade? Our late brothers would not want this, they loved children too. Maglor did not say what he thought though, instead he replied, "We can help them. Once we reach Amon Ereb there will be time to nurture them."
"You said you wished to give them lessons," Maedhros changed the subject, "what would you teach?"
"They are young, but intelligent. I believe that may be the Blood of Man, listen to how they speak, they have been taught well. But I do not wish to push too hard for now; perhaps writing and music."
Maedhros shook his head. "You and your music," he teased.
"Me and my music," Maglor agreed.
That night when they made camp Maglor was delighted to find a slow and shallow stream. "Would you like to bathe?" he asked the boys.
Predictably Elros said no and Elrond said yes.
Maglor wanted the boys to feel comfortable. "I will remain out of sight, but close enough I will hear if you call."
They twins conferred with one another quietly for a moment, then Elrond said, "Alright."
Maglor showed the boys to a secluded spot in the stream, where they would not be in danger even if there were currents he could not see. He suspected that at one time a tree must have been here, then when it died the trunk had fallen and blocked part of the stream, leading to a small cove being formed.
Still, he did not allow the twins in the water until he had thoroughly checked. His initial plan, and hope, was to be able to untie the boys. However, a glint in Elros' eyes said that would be a terrible and dangerous idea.
Maglor could have smacked himself. He had promised to allow the boys to bathe in privacy, but now he wasn't sure how he could.
"I will turn my back, once you've undressed you will hand me your clothes. That way I know you will not escape."
"How do you know we won't leave our clothes?" Elros challenged.
Maglor knelt by the boy and leaned so close that their noses barely touched. "Because I know you are not that foolish. You would die from exposure to the elements, which I assure you would not be pleasant."
He knew he had won, Elros' eyes dulled again and he nodded in grim understanding. True to his word Maglor turned his back and did not watch the boys as they undressed and bathed. He sat several feet away with his harp in his lap and their clothes beside him. He wanted to wash the clothes, but thought better of it. It would be difficult to find their belongings for a new set, and he couldn't put them to bed in wet clothes.
The boys finished and redressed. Even though their clothes were still filthy and would dirty them soon at least they were a little cleaner. Maglor took them back to their tent and watched them play for several minutes, cheered by their new state of almost-cleanliness.
Maedhros sat beside him and sipped a glass of mead. Occasionally he would wordlessly hold the glass out to Maglor for him to sip. "I have been thinking," Maglor said. "Why did you take them captive?"
"You liked the idea earlier."
"Hmm, yes, I did. But then I started thinking and I realized that more likely than not the Silmaril is never coming back. I assume the Valar have it now."
Maedhros took in a deep breath, then slowly released it. "I had to," he whispered. You won't understand, you don't feel it as I do. It's too much, it eats me and it didn't understand. It wanted them dead, it needed justification.
"Because of the Oath? It wanted you to kill them, or at least you imagined it did?"
"I didn't imagine it!"
Maglor jumped, startled by his brother's tone. Elrond and Elros stopped playing.
Maedhros tried to focus, pushing the stress and fear from his mind. I am sitting on grass. Maglor is beside me, he has his harp. He looks frightened. Elrond and Elros are in front of me, they also look frightened. There is a fire behind them. There is food cooking over the fire. I am hungry. "My apologies," he said, once he was certain he was calm again.
Maglor went back to idly plucking on his little harp and Elrond and Elros resumed crawling in the dirt. Maedhros watched them, and began to realize that they did not move quite right. He wondered if they were hurt. He began to voice he thoughts to Maglor, but the food was pronounced done and in the commotion the thought slipped from his mind.
Maglor watched his brother eat, worrying about him. As tough as Maedhros wanted to be, as tough as he thought he was, he truly was broken inside. Leaving Valinor, his captivity, Fingon's death, their father and brothers' deaths, Elurin and Elred, had ripped something out of him and the wretched oath had grown into the empty spots.
The way Maglor viewed it, in his poetic mind, was that sweet Matimo had fallen asleep, and that Maedhros the Kinslayer was his nightmare. Occasionally Matimo would wake, sometimes for a few blessed years, but then the oath would drug him and pull him down, replacing him with a shadow of his former self.
Maglor had made it his duty to wake Matimo again, for good this time.
He waited until the boys had their fill of supper, then called them to his side. "Bedtime children," he said.
They were tired and full, so it was easy to herd them inside the tent. Maedhros, or someone, had placed their ropes by their nest of furs. Maglor carefully tied them as he did every night, careful to tie tight enough to hold, but lose enough not to hurt too terribly.
They allowed him to tuck the blankets around them and fuss for several seconds before Elros finally growled at him. Elrond cuddled against his twin and went quiet, but Elros watched him all the way out of the tent.
"Maedhros," Maglor called. "Brother?"
He found the elder elf standing by the wagon that bore their brothers' bodies. Maedhros did not acknowledge his presence and they stood in respectful silence. Maedhros finally said he was going to bed and left. Maglor stayed a while longer, singing a lullaby for his brothers, before he retired to bed as well.
Sorry this took a while to post. Just started Junior year of High School. UGH!
On a positive note, I now have a beta reader, TARDIS Blue Carbuncle. But, this chapter hasn't been beta'd yet as they are still a little behind where I am on posting things, and I didn't want to wait any longer to publish this. I will be replacing it with the new version as soon as I see the revisions and make corrections.
Thanks for reading!
